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Stanford Graduate School of BusinessMatt Abrahams: "How to Make Your Communication Memorable"
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CHAPTERS
Chapter summaries
Why memorability matters: remembering your message and being remembered
Matt Abrahams frames the session around two common worries: forgetting what you planned to say and having the audience forget what you said. He previews a two-part approach—first helping the speaker remember, then helping the audience remember—using practical, participatory techniques.
- •The two most common fears: speaker forgets content; audience forgets content
- •The session will be participative, with live exercises
- •The talk will first address speaker memory, then audience memory
- •The goal is actionable tips and tactics for real communication situations
Presentation hygiene: food, caffeine, exercise, and sleep as preparation
Matt argues that memory and confidence begin before practice, with basic preparation habits he calls “presentation hygiene.” He shares a coaching story illustrating how diet and caffeine choices affected a presenter’s memory and nerves, and emphasizes exercise and sleep for stress reduction and memory formation.
- •Presentation hygiene is life preparation, not just rehearsal
- •Diet can impact nervousness and forgetfulness; improving nutrition restored confidence for a coachee
- •Use caffeine while preparing, but not right before delivering communication
- •Exercise reduces stress; sleep is critical for memory formation and energy
Using technology to prepare: tools that reduce disfluencies and simulate audiences
Matt describes technology as a practical part of communication preparation, especially in a tech-heavy environment. He highlights tools that can track filler words, vocal intensity, flow, and even simulate an audience via virtual reality.
- •Apps can help reduce disfluencies like “um,” “uh,” “like,” and “I mean”
- •Tools can provide feedback on vocal intensity and speaking flow
- •VR tools can simulate different audience sizes and attitudes
- •Leverage tech as an early step toward more memorable communication
Start with a clear goal: what you want them to know, feel, and do
Matt says effective high-stakes communication must begin with a goal defined by information, emotion, and action. He explains how having a goal improves focus and provides a real success criterion beyond merely “getting through it.”
- •A goal has three parts: what the audience should know, feel, and do
- •Define the goal before creating content
- •A goal enables evaluation of success beyond survival
- •Without a goal, people often treat “I got through it” as the success metric
Structure as a memory tool: don’t lose your audience
Matt explains how structure helps both attention and recall by setting expectations and providing a “map.” Using his tour-guide training story, he emphasizes that once you lose an audience, it’s hard to get them back—so structure is essential for keeping people with you.
- •Structure sets audience expectations and improves memory
- •The tour-guide rule “never lose your tour group” parallels “never lose your audience”
- •Setting expectations increases audience comfort and attention
- •A structure functions like a map that prevents people from getting lost
Three practical structures: comparison/contrast, problem-solution-benefit, and what–so what–now what
Matt introduces three go-to structures and explains when they work well. He highlights what–so what–now what as broadly reusable across presentations, agendas, emails, feedback, and Q&A, and briefly calls attention to his “meta” use of the structure to teach itself.
- •Comparison–contrast–conclusion: similarities, differences, then conclusion
- •Problem–solution–benefit: define the issue, propose fix, end with payoff (or opportunity variant)
- •What–so what–now what: define, explain importance, outline next steps
- •The what–so what–now what structure can also structure meetings, emails, feedback, and answers
Interactive exercise: selling a Slinky with problem–solution–benefit
Matt has participants practice structuring a pitch by inventing a non-toy purpose for a Slinky and selling it using problem–solution–benefit. The debrief reinforces that structure supports memory, flow, transitions, and concise endings.
- •Participants create and pitch an invented product use for a Slinky
- •Matt demonstrates with an example pitch using problem–solution–benefit
- •Debrief: structure helps focus, remember what comes next, and finish cleanly
- •Structure provides built-in transitions and reduces rambling
Practicing to remember: stand up, warm up, chunk content, and rehearse in the real setting
Matt outlines practice methods that strengthen delivery under pressure. He advocates standing while rehearsing, warming up the voice, chunking sections in different orders, and practicing in an environment similar to where you’ll speak to improve recall.
- •Practice by standing and speaking, not silently reading slides in your head
- •Warm up your voice; Matt leads a quick “teacup/hiccup” warm-up
- •Chunk practice: rehearse parts separately and in different sequences to avoid script dependence
- •Practice in conditions similar to the delivery environment to improve recall
When you go blank: repeat to retrace or ask a ‘back pocket’ question
Matt addresses the fear of forgetting mid-delivery and recommends not calling attention to it. He offers two recovery tactics: repeat what you just said to get back on track, or ask a prepared question to buy time while the audience reflects or discusses.
- •Don’t announce you forgot; avoid drawing attention to it
- •Repeat what you just said to retrace steps and regain the thread
- •Use a prepared ‘back pocket’ question to give yourself time to recover
- •Reflection or partner discussion can engage the audience while you check notes and reorient
Helping the audience remember: variation in voice, evidence, and visuals
Matt pivots to audience memory and starts with variation, emphasizing humans habituate to sameness. He demonstrates vocal variety with different ways to say a single word, then expands variety to supporting evidence (data, testimony, stories) and to visuals, warning against overusing bullet points.
- •Variation and novelty sustain attention; monotony leads to habituation
- •Use vocal variation; emotive words and exaggerated practice help preserve range under stress
- •Mix evidence types: data, third-party testimony, and stories/examples to reach different listeners
- •Use engaging visuals; he cautions that repeated bullet points cause disengagement
Relevance and engagement: tailor to audience knowledge, expectations, and attitudes
Matt argues memorability depends on relevance, requiring research and adaptation for each audience. He explains tailoring by knowledge, expectations, and attitudes, including reordering a structure (leading with benefits) for resistant audiences, and adds tactics for physical and mental engagement.
- •Tailor messages audience-by-audience, even though it’s more work
- •Consider audience knowledge level to calibrate depth and complexity
- •Account for expectations and attitudes; for resistance, consider leading with benefits before problems
- •Increase engagement: have audiences do something (polls, chat, questions) and think vividly (imagine/what-if, analogies)
Emotion, reflection, and continuing improvement: repetition, reflection, feedback, and resources
Matt explains emotion strengthens retention and can be conveyed through delivery and by highlighting meaningful consequences. He closes with a reflection exercise, then emphasizes improvement through repetition, reflection, and feedback, and points to resources and practice avenues before moving into Q&A.
- •Emotion helps ideas stick; bring appropriate passion and congruent feeling to delivery
- •Use acting-style recall of an emotion to convey excitement more authentically
- •Improvement loop: repetition, reflection on what worked/didn’t, and getting feedback (including recording yourself)
- •He mentions resources and practice options, including his curated website and organizations/classes for skill-building
Audience Q&A: great speakers, humor, culture, feedback conversations, interruptions, and staying on track
In Q&A, Matt answers a wide range of practical questions about real-world speaking challenges. He discusses who he finds most moving as speakers, how to use humor safely, how techniques translate across cultures, how to apply structure in coaching/feedback, how to handle distracted or interrupting participants, and how paraphrasing can redirect conversations toward your goal.
- •He says he has been moved by teenagers speaking after a tragedy in Florida and finds them highly impactful and memorable
- •On humor: it can help if you’re funny; test jokes with similar audiences and prefer self-deprecating humor
- •On culture and organizations: adapt to norms and company culture while still using goals, structure, and engagement
- •On challenges in the room: assume distractions may have reasons, engage people, and sometimes enlist devices via polls/searches
- •On interruptions and off-track conversations: acknowledge and redirect using paraphrasing; he emphasizes goals, structure, and paraphrasing as essential tools
