World Cup Pregame Special: Breaking Down the 2026 World Cup

Trevor Noah 0:00 I was trying to think of how we can, how we can frame this.

Joe Opio 0:02 Mm.

Trevor Noah 0:03 If you're listening or, or watching this, uh, you're about to em- you're about to embark on what I, what I like to think of as the most adversarial friendship you've ever experienced.

Joe Opio 0:15 I think they call it frenemy-

Trevor Noah 0:17 Frenemies

Joe Opio 0:17 ... in America. Yes.

Trevor Noah 0:18 No, uh, so are we frenemies in football?

Joe Opio 0:21 Kind of. Uh, we-

Trevor Noah 0:23 We're friends in life.

Joe Opio 0:25 Yeah, bromance in life-

Trevor Noah 0:26 Yes

Joe Opio 0:26 ... but when it comes to football-

Trevor Noah 0:27 But football-

Joe Opio 0:27 ... yes, no, oh, no, no, we never see eye to eye. We never see eye to eye.

Trevor Noah 0:30 I wonder if it'll change with the World Cup.

Joe Opio 0:32 It should, 'cause the World Cup for me, oh man, I'm so excited. You know me. The World Cup is like the pinnacle. It's like-

Trevor Noah 0:39 Oh man, the World Cup is-

Joe Opio 0:40 How do I explain it? It's funny, 'cause Americans will get it. It's like, for me as a football fan, it's like, it's like going to prom, but also like an Avengers movie premiere-

Trevor Noah 0:51 [laughs]

Joe Opio 0:52 ... but also like the Super Bowl. It's like everything, man.

Trevor Noah 0:54 [laughs]

Joe Opio 0:54 I'm so excited. I'm, oh.

Trevor Noah 0:57 Ah. I'm very excited, man. Thank you for joining me.

Joe Opio 0:59 No, it's a pleasure.

Trevor Noah 1:00 I should thank you for letting me join you-

Joe Opio 1:01 Oh, yes

Trevor Noah 1:01 ... on this football journey. Uh, thank you to everyone who's joining us. This is the first of many episodes where we're gonna be delving into the FIFA World Cup 2026. That's its full name.

Joe Opio 1:14 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:14 I like that some people wanna call it by its government name, the FIFA World Cup, 'cause we just say the World Cup.

Joe Opio 1:19 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 1:19 And then other people are like, "Which World Cup?"

Joe Opio 1:20 You know what I found funny? In South America, they don't even call it the World cup. They just say Mundial, the world. They don't even say Copa. They just, it-

Trevor Noah 1:29 That's how-

Joe Opio 1:30 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:30 ... familiar it is.

Joe Opio 1:31 They just say Mundial.

Trevor Noah 1:31 Yeah, you see-

Joe Opio 1:32 That's it

Trevor Noah 1:32 ... that's what, that's what we need.

Joe Opio 1:33 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:33 Cup.

Joe Opio 1:34 Just-

Trevor Noah 1:34 Cup or world

Joe Opio 1:35 ... yes, or world. That's, and everyone understands what you're talking about.

Trevor Noah 1:38 Damn.

Joe Opio 1:38 But boy am I excited. Let us delve into this rollercoaster ride.

Trevor Noah 1:42 It's also, it's also the biggest World Cup basically-

Joe Opio 1:45 It is

Trevor Noah 1:45 ... that's ever happened, right?

Joe Opio 1:46 It is.

Trevor Noah 1:46 First World Cup to be in three countries.

Joe Opio 1:49 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:49 Right? So it's-

Joe Opio 1:50 Canada, USA, Mexico

Trevor Noah 1:51 ... uh, Canada, the US, Mexico.

Joe Opio 1:52 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:52 Uh, it's the first World Cup that is gonna have how many teams?

Joe Opio 1:55 48 teams.

Trevor Noah 1:56 48 teams.

Joe Opio 1:56 I think, I think of it as a typically American World Cup. It's super-sized.

Trevor Noah 2:02 [laughs]

Joe Opio 2:02 [laughs] Like they, they took it to McDonald's, or they took it to one of their GMO farms and just pump it-

Trevor Noah 2:09 [laughs]

Joe Opio 2:10 ... with those... You know, you've seen those like American chickens where you go like, wow.

Trevor Noah 2:12 [laughs]

Joe Opio 2:13 It's a super-sized-

Trevor Noah 2:14 Oh, man

Joe Opio 2:15 ... American World Cup.

Trevor Noah 2:15 Super-sized American World Cup.

Joe Opio 2:18 48 teams.

Trevor Noah 2:18 And it is, do you know what? Actually, it makes it the perfect American World Cup, because what is America without Canada and Mexico? If you think about it, if you think about honestly, I know a lot of people listening to this or watching this will be like, "Wait, wait, wait. What, what did you say?" F- first of all, for the world, Canada is America.

Joe Opio 2:33 Yes.

Trevor Noah 2:34 I know that's not correct-

Joe Opio 2:35 Yes

Trevor Noah 2:35 ... but for the world, it is.

Joe Opio 2:37 We don't have time to-

Trevor Noah 2:38 And-

Joe Opio 2:38 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 2:39 And what is America without Mexico? Think of all the food people are gonna be eating while watching the games. Most of it will be Mexican food.

Joe Opio 2:46 Mexican food, yes.

Trevor Noah 2:47 You know what I mean? What, you take it out of, what is the Super Bowl without Mexican food? What is, like a, you know-

Joe Opio 2:53 It's very interesting, 'cause the, the, especially the thing you said about Canada and America because Canadians are like, we're like, "No, we're not Americans," but where we come from, we have like, we're like, no, we don't have time to-

Trevor Noah 3:03 Yeah, no

Joe Opio 3:03 ... dice you and splice you.

Trevor Noah 3:04 No, no, no, no.

Joe Opio 3:04 You're all Americans.

Trevor Noah 3:05 No, my friend.

Joe Opio 3:05 Yes.

Trevor Noah 3:05 It's the same way Africa's a continent for them.

Joe Opio 3:07 Yes.

Trevor Noah 3:08 It's like, it's the same vibe.

Joe Opio 3:09 We don't have the... Yes.

Trevor Noah 3:10 It's, it's, it's pretty much the same vibe. And they've got a half, this will be the first World Cup with a halftime show.

Joe Opio 3:14 I think that's the thing that's pissing off most soccer fans. I know that's the thing that's exciting most American fans, but most soccer or football fans, oof, they're pissed off. They're mad about the halftime show. I don't know what you think about it-

Trevor Noah 3:27 Is, is Drake-

Joe Opio 3:27 ... but they're mad

Trevor Noah 3:28 ... doing it or not?

Joe Opio 3:29 No, no, no. It's going to be Shakira, it's going to be Madonna, and it's going to be BTS.

Trevor Noah 3:33 I thought they said Drake was doing it.

Joe Opio 3:34 No.

Trevor Noah 3:34 What happened?

Joe Opio 3:35 No, Drake is not doing it. I think it's, it's going to be curated.

Trevor Noah 3:37 No, but when did that, no, no, no. But when did that change? Because I remember an announcement where they said Drake will be doing the halftime show.

Joe Opio 3:43 Yeah, but then Kendrick happened.

Trevor Noah 3:45 You're telling me that Kendrick roasted Drake so badly-

Joe Opio 3:48 I th- I think, I think, no

Trevor Noah 3:50 ... that-

Joe Opio 3:50 I think-

Trevor Noah 3:50 ... that FIFA came and said, "Drake, you are in, but, uh, after we saw what happened."

Joe Opio 3:55 Yes, 'cause FIFA doesn't like losers. But I think what happened was-

Trevor Noah 3:58 [laughs]

Joe Opio 3:58 No, no, no, no. No, 'cause you are right, actually. Drake was very involved. He was like an ambassador for Canada.

Trevor Noah 4:03 Drake was-

Joe Opio 4:03 Yeah, you're right

Trevor Noah 4:04 ... I thought Drake was doing it.

Joe Opio 4:05 No, it's going to be curated by Coldplay, which means, well, if you're, if there are any...

Trevor Noah 4:12 Any what? CEOs in the audience they need to hide themselves.

Joe Opio 4:14 Yes. I'm just saying stay away from the screens, but it's going to be cur- But the thing is-

Trevor Noah 4:17 You make it sound like Coldplay set that up as part of their show.

Joe Opio 4:21 Well, it worked, didn't it?

Trevor Noah 4:22 It would be an amazing, it would be amazing PR if they just did that at every show.

Joe Opio 4:25 And can you imagine if you did it at the World Cup? 'Cause then it would blow up even larger than-

Trevor Noah 4:29 That is probably my favorite thing at the World Cup, is them cutting to the fans.

Joe Opio 4:34 Or the producers. No, but the thing about-

Trevor Noah 4:35 Not the producers, the cameramen

Joe Opio 4:36 ... the thing-

Trevor Noah 4:36 Like, let me tell you something.

Joe Opio 4:37 Mm.

Trevor Noah 4:37 If anyone who works as a cameraman, their ability to find two things in a crowd of 50,000 people, they will find the most beautiful woman, and they will find the strangest looking fan. I don't know how they do it. I don't know how they find them. I don't know. Like, there's not a single match I've watched where I've gone, "Huh, everyone here is just normal."

Joe Opio 4:56 No, it's funny because when you watch European games, they don't cut to the beautiful women as much as when you watch African Cup of Nations games.

Trevor Noah 5:04 Or, or, or-

Joe Opio 5:05 'Cause in-

Trevor Noah 5:06 ... or Copa Libertadores.

Joe Opio 5:07 Yes. 'Cause like, it, I think it's also like a very cultural thing. 'Cause I think in America and in the West, if you keep cutting to beautiful women, then it's seen as maybe sexist or maybe, while in Africa and South America, it's seen as just appreciation of the beautiful game.

Trevor Noah 5:21 Yes, the beautiful game. But-

Joe Opio 5:21 And in America, I think they're also like cutting to kids crying. But to go back to the halftime show.

Trevor Noah 5:26 Yeah.

Joe Opio 5:27 The reason I think fans are very pissed is you imagine you're watching the World Cup. Let's say the last World Cup.

Trevor Noah 5:32 Yeah.

Joe Opio 5:32 You're a Fran- you're a France fan. You're 2-0 down at halftime, and then you have to watch Madonna and Shakira-

Trevor Noah 5:38 [laughs]

Joe Opio 5:39 ... dancing when all you need is just like the players to come back. So that's why most fans are like, "We don't need-"

Trevor Noah 5:45 [laughs]

Joe Opio 5:46 'Cause American, American fans don't care. They'll watch a halftime show when their team is losing. But football fans, I think there's too much investment.

Trevor Noah 5:52 When it co- when it comes to the Super Bowl, the halftime show is oftentimes more popular than the Super- Like, you'll see the ratings-

Joe Opio 6:02 Than the game, yes

Trevor Noah 6:03 ... spike-

Joe Opio 6:03 Yes

Trevor Noah 6:04 ... during the, the halftime show. But for the World Cup, it's gonna be interesting to see, 'cause- A World Cup half- like a normal halftime is 15 minutes.

Joe Opio 6:12 Yes.

Trevor Noah 6:13 And now this one they say is gonna be 30 minutes.

Joe Opio 6:15 It's going to be... I think it's gonna be 11, but the whole halftime is gonna be 30 minutes, 'cause normally it's 15 minutes.

Trevor Noah 6:20 Yeah.

Joe Opio 6:20 The halftime, halftime-

Trevor Noah 6:21 Wait, so they're gonna make it 11 from 15?

Joe Opio 6:23 No, they're gonna make it 11. They're gonna add m- 11. So your, your-

Trevor Noah 6:26 Oh, they're gonna add 11 minutes

Joe Opio 6:27 ... the halftime is going to be 30 minutes.

Trevor Noah 6:28 Yeah.

Joe Opio 6:28 Normally it's 15 minutes.

Trevor Noah 6:29 Right.

Joe Opio 6:29 But then they're going to add 11 minutes of showtime and dancing, which will make it, like, 26, 30 minutes. So the teams are going to be out there d- in the dressing rooms for 30 minutes. But what I'm saying is-

Trevor Noah 6:41 Do you think, do you think that's gonna-

Joe Opio 6:43 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 6:43 Do you think that's gonna help the teams, or do you think that'll hurt the teams? Like, what, what would you-

Joe Opio 6:46 It would-

Trevor Noah 6:46 What would you rather have if you were a, if you were a winning team or a losing team? Would you rather have more time or less time?

Joe Opio 6:52 No, that's why I think, like, both sets of fans, if you're winning-

Trevor Noah 6:55 Yeah

Joe Opio 6:55 ... you just want the game to be over so that you can get to the... You just want the team to come back out.

Trevor Noah 6:59 So you want a short, you want a short halftime?

Joe Opio 7:00 Yes. And if you're losing, you just want... You, you don't want to, like, linger in that state of losing. You want your team to come back out, maybe mount a comeback. So no one is gonna be happy about the halftime.

Trevor Noah 7:12 Well, it depends on how the halftime is. Maybe it's a boring game and then the halftime saves it.

Joe Opio 7:17 The, the, the Beautiful Game is never boring. You've spoken like a true American.

Trevor Noah 7:21 You never know.

Joe Opio 7:21 It's never, it's a final-

Trevor Noah 7:22 Fi- no, but, but finals-

Joe Opio 7:23 ... even near, near

Trevor Noah 7:24 ... but finals can be... Look, finals can be cagey.

Joe Opio 7:27 Yes.

Trevor Noah 7:27 That's the problem.

Joe Opio 7:27 But-

Trevor Noah 7:27 Finals, you can find everyone's a little tense, everyone's a little nervous. Right now we're not even thinking about that, though, 'cause right now it's all just about, like, who's gonna be in the World Cup.

Joe Opio 7:36 Who's making it to the game. Yes.

Trevor Noah 7:37 Yeah, like the selections of the teams. Yo, bro, have you seen... Have you been watching the Brazil reaction videos to the players being called up to the World Cup?

Joe Opio 7:46 I was watching them with my American friends, and they thought they were over the top. And I told them, "No, they are par for the course." If you get called up-

Trevor Noah 7:53 Wait, what do you m- what do you mean they thought it was over the top?

Joe Opio 7:54 No, because like, you know, again, when you watch American sports, when they call up the Dream Team.

Trevor Noah 7:59 Yeah.

Joe Opio 7:59 You know, LeBron

Joe Opio 8:00 is like, "Okay, we're going to go mess up some Angorans."

Trevor Noah 8:02 [laughs]

Joe Opio 8:02 But he's not, like, losing his mind. And then, like, we watched Neymar-

Trevor Noah 8:07 Oh, yeah. Let me show you, let me show you this, this, this video

Joe Opio 8:08 ... crying and people laugh, and all running around. And then we're like, "Oh, this, this is a bit." Yeah.

Trevor Noah 8:11 This, this was, this was, like, one of my favorite videos. Here, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Joe Opio 8:14 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 8:14 Let me see if I can get this thing going. This was-

Joe Opio 8:15 Yeah.

Trevor Noah 8:16 Yeah, this, this was the Neymar one. Look at this.

Joe Opio 8:19 Look at the tension. Luiz Henrique Zanin. And they're calling them up in- Mateus Cunha- ... alphabetical order. Yes ... Manchester United. So now they know Neymar is coming up. Yes.

Trevor Noah 8:31 The woman, the woman next to Neymar-

Joe Opio 8:33 Yes

Trevor Noah 8:33 ... she's, like, feeling it. Look.

Joe Opio 8:35 Neymar Jr Santos. [crowd cheering] So they thought that was over the top.

Trevor Noah 8:40 Bro, you know what's wild is it's like he won the World Cup.

Joe Opio 8:45 No, just making-

Trevor Noah 8:46 Look at this. Look at this

Joe Opio 8:47 ... and this is Neymar. He's not, like, some scrub player. He's not like some... This is Neymar, probably the greatest talent Brazil has produced in the last 20 years, and that's how much it means to him. He's crying. He got emotional. And so when Americans watched that they went like, "He's just getting called up." And I tried to explain-

Trevor Noah 9:06 Yeah

Joe Opio 9:06 ... to them that it's like, you know, you know what I mean? But-

Trevor Noah 9:09 Yeah, but wait. But the, the thing, the thing for me is, like...

Joe Opio 9:14 He's hugging everyone, his family, his physio.

Trevor Noah 9:17 The... No, no. You know, you know what it is for me is I like that people were filming their own potential pain. 'Cause this is, this is essentially like you-

Joe Opio 9:27 He doesn't know. Yes

Trevor Noah 9:28 ... No, but I'm saying it's...

Joe Opio 9:29 Mm.

Trevor Noah 9:31 First of all, I don't know why they have to do it like this. You could just put it out on the internet immediately. They make it like the Oscars-

Joe Opio 9:41 Yeah

Trevor Noah 9:41 ... 'cause you have to sit there and then w- like wait for your name. He could also phone the players ahead of time and be like, "Yo, you're in the squad."

Joe Opio 9:47 No, but in Brazil it's like the Oscars.

Trevor Noah 9:50 Yeah, but I'm, but I'm-

Joe Opio 9:51 In Brazil getting-

Trevor Noah 9:51 ... but I'm saying, like, why do they have to do it like that?

Joe Opio 9:53 'Cause it's suppo-

Trevor Noah 9:53 I'm just feeling for the fans

Joe Opio 9:53 ... it's supposed to be an event.

Trevor Noah 9:55 I'm feeling for the fans is what I'm saying.

Joe Opio 9:57 So this is what happens. In Brazil, the whole country, or, like, in football-loving countries, the whole country comes to a standstill. It's an event.

Trevor Noah 10:04 Everyone waits for the-

Joe Opio 10:04 Yes

Trevor Noah 10:04 ... they wait for the announcement.

Joe Opio 10:05 It's, it's almost like think of it as the night of the presidential election in the US. That's how it is. Everyone is waiting on tenterhooks. It's like there has to be a surprise. It has to be a surprise. So the players are watching. And my American, my American friends went like, "Oh, but this is over the top." And I told them, "No, this is how it feels when you guys get your college admission letters."

Trevor Noah 10:27 I like how you're throwing in that you have American friends. [laughs]

Joe Opio 10:29 I, I have in, in this I-

Trevor Noah 10:30 You're really making sure that we know, eh?

Joe Opio 10:31 I, I-

Trevor Noah 10:31 You're making sure that we know

Joe Opio 10:32 ... I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm-

Trevor Noah 10:33 You're like, "Let me tell you about my American friends"

Joe Opio 10:35 ... I'm, I'm, I'm like a white guy in the South. "Let me tell you about my Black friends."

Trevor Noah 10:38 [laughs]

Joe Opio 10:39 I've collected a bunch of them.

Trevor Noah 10:40 You make it m- like [laughs] you make it seem like we don't have the, "Uh, so my American friends. Uh, to those of you-"

Joe Opio 10:46 No.

Trevor Noah 10:47 What are you trying to, like, shine on your Ugandan back home?

Joe Opio 10:49 No, no, no, no, no, because if I was watching this with Ugandan-

Trevor Noah 10:50 Joe, Joe's trying to be like, "This, uh, my, uh, my American friends."

Joe Opio 10:54 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 10:54 Why are your American friends more special than your other friends, Joe?

Joe Opio 10:56 If, if I'm watching this-

Trevor Noah 10:57 This guy

Joe Opio 10:57 ... with, if I'm watching this with my Ugandan friends, they get it, totally get it. They'll be like, "Oh, we understand the reaction."

Trevor Noah 11:03 Do your, do your American friends know who is or isn't your American friend? You should do these announcement videos for them.

Joe Opio 11:08 And it's-

Trevor Noah 11:08 You should announce, like, who's in your American-

Joe Opio 11:10 No, you see-

Trevor Noah 11:11 Welcome, welcome-

Joe Opio 11:11 Yes

Trevor Noah 11:11 ... welcome to Joe's, uh, American friends list. Ah.

Joe Opio 11:15 And then people are surprised that they're not here.

Trevor Noah 11:15 These are the people who have made it. Uh-

Joe Opio 11:17 This is a top five

Trevor Noah 11:18 ... uh, John B.

Joe Opio 11:19 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 11:20 John B., congratulations, sir. You are my friend. You are my American friend.

Joe Opio 11:24 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 11:24 Uh, look at this. Yeah, this was, this was crazy. This was one of my favorites, bro. Like, this is where you go.

Joe Opio 11:29 Yeah, this is the one where-

Trevor Noah 11:30 This is the Brazil goalkeeper. Look at this

Joe Opio 11:31 ... third-choice goalkeeper.

Trevor Noah 11:33 Third.

Joe Opio 11:34 Yes.

Trevor Noah 11:34 Look, look at this.

Joe Opio 11:35 He gets called up.

Trevor Noah 11:36 He's not even gonna play.

Joe Opio 11:37 Yes. He's the guy. So he's the guy on the ground, and he totally passes out. He blacked out, out of excitement, and no one in his family noticed, 'cause they're busy doing laps around the couch.

Trevor Noah 11:49 If you, if you pass out from an announcement, I'm gonna take you out of the team if I'm the coach.

Joe Opio 11:54 No, but that's the passion you need.

Trevor Noah 11:55 No, no, no, bro.

Joe Opio 11:56 That's someone who's willing to put their life on the line.

Trevor Noah 11:57 Hey, man, let me tell you something. If you lose consciousness because of an exciting moment, I'm not taking you to the World Cup, my brother.

Joe Opio 12:03 You don't need p- you don't need players fainting before he has to save a penalty.

Trevor Noah 12:06 Imagine, bro. The guy, the guy's so excited-

Joe Opio 12:08 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 12:08 ... or he saves a penalty, and then he faints 'cause of his excitement. This for me-

Joe Opio 12:13 No, you need a player-

Trevor Noah 12:14 Yo, yo

Joe Opio 12:14 ... that has videos of the goats.

Trevor Noah 12:15 Yo, yo, yo.

Joe Opio 12:15 Trevor, you're going to war.

Trevor Noah 12:17 Yo, yo, videos of the goats.

Joe Opio 12:17 Yes.

Trevor Noah 12:18 Yo.

Joe Opio 12:18 Okay.

Trevor Noah 12:18 Let me tell you something You are out. If I'm the coach and you faint because I've selected you, you're out. You know why?

Joe Opio 12:26 If you're a dating app, do you want a girl who passes out in excitement when you swipe right?

Trevor Noah 12:31 No.

Joe Opio 12:31 Or do you want a girl who goes like, "Ah-

Trevor Noah 12:32 No, you don't

Joe Opio 12:33 ... I want a girl who passes out in excitement when I swipe right."

Trevor Noah 12:36 My man-

Joe Opio 12:36 What are you talking about?

Trevor Noah 12:36 ... first of all, I don't know what app you're on.

Joe Opio 12:38 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 12:39 If somebody faints because you've selected them on a dating app-

Joe Opio 12:42 Yes

Trevor Noah 12:43 ... you need-

Joe Opio 12:43 I feel chosen. They feel chosen

Trevor Noah 12:44 ... my friend, you need to run in the opposite direction-

Joe Opio 12:47 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 12:47 ... because this person is-

Joe Opio 12:50 This is-

Trevor Noah 12:51 This is, this is psychopathic behavior.

Joe Opio 12:52 Exactly. Trevor's spoken like a man who has options.

Trevor Noah 12:56 [laughs]

Joe Opio 12:56 I'm t- [laughs] I'm speaking, I'm speaking like a normal man. And then-

Trevor Noah 12:59 You know, um, you know, so you, you know what this, this, this got me thinking about? Like, with the selection, now the big news is, like, who was left out. I mean, this, this happens to every team.

Joe Opio 13:07 The funny thing about the keeper, before you get out, we get to the person who was left out. Funny thing about the keeper, he got called up for Qatar 2022, and he played only 10 minutes. So he knows he's not going to get, like, a full game.

Trevor Noah 13:19 Yeah, but it's, but it's-

Joe Opio 13:19 But-

Trevor Noah 13:19 ... being chosen as-

Joe Opio 13:21 Yes

Trevor Noah 13:21 ... you know what I mean? It's, it's, it's the Brazil national team, and you're 38. I get it. The, the, the surprising thing to me is, like, who coaches choose to leave out sometimes.

Joe Opio 13:32 Yes, 'cause when they call up someone, they have sac- sacrifice another.

Trevor Noah 13:34 Yeah.

Joe Opio 13:35 Mm.

Trevor Noah 13:35 I was surprised that João Pedro didn't get selected for, for the Brazil national

Trevor Noah 13:40 team.

Joe Opio 13:41 I was surprised as well.

Trevor Noah 13:42 I know Chelsea hasn't-

Joe Opio 13:43 Yes

Trevor Noah 13:43 ... I know Chelsea hasn't done well, but-

Joe Opio 13:46 He was their player of the season

Trevor Noah 13:47 ... I th- if you watch every single minute that João Pedro has been on a pitch this season, and in previous seasons-

Joe Opio 13:54 He's been a difference maker, yeah

Trevor Noah 13:55 ... there are few players who make more of an impact, and also few players who are as dynamic and versatile as he is. João Pedro can hold up the game for, and if you look at his size and stature-

Joe Opio 14:10 Mm. Mm-hmm

Trevor Noah 14:10 ... you don't think he can hold up the game the way he does, but he does. João Pedro can spur an attack on the wing. João Pedro can play like an, like an advanced forward position-

Joe Opio 14:20 Mm

Trevor Noah 14:20 ... where he's just waiting for a through ball and he's gonna finish it. He can cut back. He can dribble. He can trap the ball. You, like, literally like it's got glue.

Joe Opio 14:28 He's a complete package, yes. No, you're right.

Trevor Noah 14:29 I was surprised that they left him behind.

Joe Opio 14:30 The irony is-

Trevor Noah 14:31 They took, they took Ryan.

Joe Opio 14:32 Yes.

Trevor Noah 14:33 By the way, and can I just say, Ryan is, yo, shout out to Ryan. Ryan is one of my favorite, like, you, you know in our football group-

Joe Opio 14:39 Mm-hmm

Trevor Noah 14:39 ... I talked about him long ago.

Joe Opio 14:40 Yes, yeah. He, he did come, yes.

Trevor Noah 14:41 I love Ryan from Bournemouth-

Joe Opio 14:42 Mm

Trevor Noah 14:42 ... in the, in the English Premier League.

Joe Opio 14:44 And he had a better season than-

Trevor Noah 14:44 He's one of, he's one of my-

Joe Opio 14:45 ... they had a better season than Chelsea. But the thing is, the thing with João Pedro, the irony-

Trevor Noah 14:48 He's, he's one of my, he's one of my favorite, favorite, favorite players.

Joe Opio 14:50 I think the irony was João Pedro actually was interviewed short, I think, three or four weeks before the call-up, and he went to call, "I want Neymar to come." He was pro Neymar coming because he didn't think that Neymar coming-

Trevor Noah 15:01 You're lying

Joe Opio 15:01 ... to the World Cup would affect his place on the team.

Trevor Noah 15:04 No, man, you're lying.

Joe Opio 15:04 No, he did.

Trevor Noah 15:05 João Pedro in an interview said, "I hope Neymar comes"?

Joe Opio 15:07 Yeah, of course.

Trevor Noah 15:07 But you, you see that they didn't listen to him. He said, "I hope he comes."

Joe Opio 15:10 Yes.

Trevor Noah 15:10 As in he was assuming he's already on the trip.

Joe Opio 15:13 Yeah, no, no. He, yeah, he said-

Trevor Noah 15:14 He didn't say, "I hope he goes."

Joe Opio 15:15 Yes.

Trevor Noah 15:15 He said, "I hope Jo- I hope Neymar comes to the World Cup."

Joe Opio 15:18 Yeah, and then also the crazy thing is João Pedro also had a call-up party, watch party with his family, and unlike Neymar's, his was-

Trevor Noah 15:28 Did we see the video?

Joe Opio 15:28 Yeah, I thought... Yeah, I can't, yeah.

Trevor Noah 15:30 Can we try and find that video? I want to see.

Joe Opio 15:32 It's, it's right there. You know, you-

Trevor Noah 15:33 Where, where?

Joe Opio 15:33 Yeah. He, yeah.

Trevor Noah 15:33 Oh, let's see. Okay, we got this. Hold on. Let's see here.

Joe Opio 15:35 Yeah, and it turned into a wake.

Trevor Noah 15:36 Oh, man.

Joe Opio 15:37 It was- [laughs]

Trevor Noah 15:38 Oh, man. Let's see here.

Joe Opio 15:40 It's crazy to see a party-

Trevor Noah 15:41 Wait, wait, wait. Hold on, hold on. Sh, let's see

Joe Opio 15:41 ... turn into a funeral. Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 15:43 Let's see. I want to see. [crowd cheering] Okay.

Joe Opio 15:49 Yeah, so this is the family waiting there. Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 16:00 This is his whole family.

Joe Opio 16:00 Yeah, so the moment they call out Raphinha, 'cause they're calling them in alphabetical order. Yeah. [crowd cheering] So you can see them realizing that he's not making the plane. So this-

Trevor Noah 16:22 Okay, can I, can I just say-

Joe Opio 16:23 This is like if you swipe right on-

Trevor Noah 16:25 Can I just say a few... Wait, Joe-

Joe Opio 16:25 Okay

Trevor Noah 16:25 ... can I just say a few things?

Joe Opio 16:26 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 16:28 Number one, why do you put the video out?

Joe Opio 16:35 They were live-streaming.

Trevor Noah 16:37 They were live-streaming it?

Joe Opio 16:38 Live-streaming, yeah. All the videos were being live-streamed.

Trevor Noah 16:40 Oh, my goodness, man.

Joe Opio 16:40 So they didn't even have the option of recording and not-

Trevor Noah 16:42 What, what had, what has happened in the, in the world-

Joe Opio 16:44 'Cause you're so sure you're gonna get called up

Trevor Noah 16:45 ... yeah, but what has happened in the world? I, you know, I, I, I'll see videos on the internet all the time where people broadcast their shame and pain, and I'm like, "What are you, what are you..." Have you ever seen these videos of people who are like, "This was the moment I found out that I got fired," and it's just them, like, in a meeting, and it's like [laughs] I'm like, "What, what?" You know why you got fired? Because you film yourself in meetings, bro.

Joe Opio 17:10 [laughs] The whole time.

Trevor Noah 17:11 That's why you got fired.

Joe Opio 17:12 No, but I-

Trevor Noah 17:12 Why, like, why-

Joe Opio 17:13 No, but I think he was-

Trevor Noah 17:14 Yeah, but why didn't he-

Joe Opio 17:14 ... he was so sure he was going to. He was so sure he was going to.

Trevor Noah 17:16 No, but Joe, why not record it and then put it out afterwards? You, you can-

Joe Opio 17:22 No

Trevor Noah 17:22 ... you can also do that.

Joe Opio 17:23 No, no, but the-

Trevor Noah 17:23 Also, also, I love how [laughs] can I just say, 'cause I'm a João Pedro fan-

Joe Opio 17:28 Yes

Trevor Noah 17:28 ... but I do think it's funny how [laughs]

Joe Opio 17:31 His videos are not-

Trevor Noah 17:32 ... he's bring his, you bring your whole family. You bring everyone, and then, like, your family's basically shitting on other players now.

Joe Opio 17:39 Yes. No, 'cause I think-

Trevor Noah 17:40 'Cause you hear, like, when some of the names are called-

Joe Opio 17:42 Yes. Yes. They-

Trevor Noah 17:42 ... it's just like, "Nah, that loser. Nah, that idiot."

Joe Opio 17:46 You know what? Okay, okay, I'll say this. You know, I feel like that's what would happen if we had, like, livestreams of families of Oscar contenders actually watching the Oscar ceremony.

Trevor Noah 17:55 We need to pitch that.

Joe Opio 17:56 Yes. 'Cause you know those-

Trevor Noah 17:57 Yo, that's a great idea

Joe Opio 17:58 ... yes.

Trevor Noah 17:58 We need to pitch that.

Joe Opio 17:59 'Cause what happens is the Oscar losers normally, you know, react in a very-

Trevor Noah 18:01 In fact, we should trademark that.

Joe Opio 18:02 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 18:02 We'll do it, we'll do it when I host the Oscars. We'll do that. We're going to-

Joe Opio 18:05 Yes. You should have the families there

Trevor Noah 18:06 ... we're gonna, we're gonna have the families live-streamed at home-

Joe Opio 18:09 They're like, "No"

Trevor Noah 18:09 ... just so, just so that they can scream out things.

Joe Opio 18:11 "Michael B. Jordan was trash." [laughs]

Trevor Noah 18:15 [laughs] That'll be so dope, bro.

Joe Opio 18:17 No, but I-

Trevor Noah 18:17 Oh, that would be so much fun

Joe Opio 18:19 ... no, but you are, you are laughing at me-

Trevor Noah 18:20 Oh, man. It's just a vampire movie.

Joe Opio 18:23 Yeah. [laughs] You know, you-

Trevor Noah 18:23 Nobody deserves anything

Joe Opio 18:24 ... you are laughing at me for saying swipe right. Now you see what happens when you swipe right on a girl and she ghosts you? That's what happened with João Pedro.

Trevor Noah 18:31 Yeah, but this-

Joe Opio 18:32 Mm-hmm

Trevor Noah 18:32 ... but again, why? You don't have to tell... You know, you know what's nice about a dating app? It's between you and the app

Joe Opio 18:38 Yeah, but when, so when, if you're so sure-

Trevor Noah 18:39 It's be- it's between you-

Joe Opio 18:40 If you're so sure the girl is going to say yes

Trevor Noah 18:42 ... yes. Why are you live streaming you swiping on a dating app?

Joe Opio 18:46 Because I'm so sure the girl's going to swipe right-

Trevor Noah 18:47 Well, then, then you know what? This is a lesson in humility, my friend. Don't press anything. We've got more What Now? after this. The Spanish team was the same. This was, um, I mean, these are your boy- Who are you supporting for the World Cup?

Joe Opio 19:09 I'm supporting Messi because I would want Messi to do... I'm a huge Messi fan.

Trevor Noah 19:13 I mean, you don't have to tell us that

Joe Opio 19:14 And I think,

Joe Opio 19:15 I think, I think he has given so much football and-

Trevor Noah 19:16 It's crazy that you don't even say, "I'm supporting Argentina"

Joe Opio 19:18 No, I'm supporting Messi. I don't care about Argentina. I want Messi to do a repeat. But while my heart says Argentina, I think my brain says France or Spain.

Trevor Noah 19:29 Hmm. My mind's telling me Messi.

Joe Opio 19:32 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 19:32 But my body, my body wants France or Spain.

Joe Opio 19:36 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 19:37 That song didn't do as well-

Joe Opio 19:38 Yes, 'cause-

Trevor Noah 19:38 ... on the charts. But now there's a gap.

Joe Opio 19:39 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 19:39 There's a... I think you can get the, the remix rights to that song very cheap, Joe.

Joe Opio 19:43 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 19:43 I know you've always been wanting to make it, and it's been, it's been very expensive for you to get the rights.

Joe Opio 19:47 I, I-

Trevor Noah 19:47 I think you can get them now. You can-

Joe Opio 19:48 I, I, I think Spain is to start. And I think even the fact that Gavi...

Trevor Noah 19:54 Why was Gavi so surprised, though? Didn't he-

Joe Opio 19:56 No, because he just came off an injury.

Trevor Noah 19:57 Oh, okay, okay, okay.

Joe Opio 19:58 He was player. He was injured.

Trevor Noah 19:59 Okay, got it

Joe Opio 19:59 He was injured for a year and a half.

Trevor Noah 20:01 No, good for him.

Joe Opio 20:01 And again, again, it shows that this is not just a Brazilian phenomenon. It's like-

Trevor Noah 20:05 Wait, wait, wait. Is, is, is-

Joe Opio 20:07 Lamine Yamal

Trevor Noah 20:08 ... is Gavi the same as Gabi?

Joe Opio 20:10 No.

Trevor Noah 20:11 Is Gabi another player?

Joe Opio 20:12 Gabi's another player.

Trevor Noah 20:12 Oh.

Joe Opio 20:12 Gabi used to play for Atletico.

Trevor Noah 20:14 Okay. I thought-

Joe Opio 20:15 Gavi is the young-

Trevor Noah 20:15 I thought Gabi and Gavi were the same-

Joe Opio 20:16 No

Trevor Noah 20:16 ... but depending on how you speak Spanish.

Joe Opio 20:17 No, Gavi, Gavi's a new, young... Yeah, he's, I wouldn't call him new. He's 19 now. He's a player for Barcelona, got injured.

Trevor Noah 20:23 No, no, no, I know.

Joe Opio 20:24 Yeah.

Trevor Noah 20:24 I always, I called him Gabi, though.

Joe Opio 20:25 No, he's Gavi.

Trevor Noah 20:26 So he's Gavi?

Joe Opio 20:27 Yes, Gavi.

Trevor Noah 20:27 Oh.

Joe Opio 20:28 Yeah, mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 20:28 Okay. All right, I got it.

Joe Opio 20:29 Gavia, mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 20:30 That's your boy.

Joe Opio 20:31 Like Pablo Gavia Escobar.

Trevor Noah 20:33 Look at you getting excited, my man.

Joe Opio 20:34 Yes.

Trevor Noah 20:34 Huh? Is there enough space in those-

Joe Opio 20:36 Plana Oclop

Trevor Noah 20:36 ... is there enough space in those pants?

Joe Opio 20:37 [laughs] You know I love these-

Trevor Noah 20:39 Stop talking about Barcelona players

Joe Opio 20:40 ... you know I love these young boys of Barcelona

Trevor Noah 20:41 ... stop talking about Barcelona players. We've got to get Joe into some sweats.

Joe Opio 20:44 You know I love these-

Trevor Noah 20:44 Get out of those jeans

Joe Opio 20:45 ... you know I love these young boys of Barcelona. You know I love them.

Trevor Noah 20:47 Yeah. Hey, relax yourself here, Epstein.

Joe Opio 20:50 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 20:50 Relax yourself, Jeffrey.

Joe Opio 20:51 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 20:51 Hey, busy out here talking about young boys. Whoa-ho.

Joe Opio 20:54 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 20:54 Hey, people will clip that, my man.

Joe Opio 20:56 Mm.

Trevor Noah 20:57 You want to relax your... Hey, yo. Hey, yo, as the streets would say-

Joe Opio 20:59 There are many of us, though

Trevor Noah 21:00 ... hey, yo. [laughs]

Joe Opio 21:01 When it comes to football, there are many Jeffrey Epsteins-

Trevor Noah 21:03 [laughs]

Joe Opio 21:03 ... many Barcelona fans.

Trevor Noah 21:05 [laughs] Joe does not care about being clipped.

Joe Opio 21:06 Oh, we love them young.

Trevor Noah 21:08 At all. [laughs]

Joe Opio 21:09 Oh. [laughs] Lamine Yamal, Gavi, Pedri.

Trevor Noah 21:12 [laughs]

Joe Opio 21:12 Oh, the younger, the better. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 21:13 You know, I don't know what's worse, the fact that you're saying it like that or the fact that you're so good at rubbing your hands like a villain.

Joe Opio 21:18 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 21:18 'Cause, like, your technique is flawless. You have flawless rubbing hand villain tech-

Joe Opio 21:22 It's, it-

Trevor Noah 21:22 Oh, man. Yo, you know what we have to talk about? England.

Joe Opio 21:27 Oh, that's... Yeah, no, that's... I, I don't even know what to talk. Like, it's such-

Trevor Noah 21:30 No, okay, let's, let's... Okay, let's break it down. Let's set the stage.

Joe Opio 21:32 Okay.

Trevor Noah 21:32 So, uh, uh, um, for those who don't know, England is probably the... How, how can I phrase this? I would argue England is probably the most talented team to not

Trevor Noah 21:50 do as well as they should at World Cups over the past-

Joe Opio 21:52 Or maybe they're the most hyped team, 'cause they-

Trevor Noah 21:55 No, they're, they're... Look, no, no. Look, look. They're definitely hyped.

Joe Opio 21:57 Yes.

Trevor Noah 21:57 But if we're honest, if we're honest, let's be fair to them. I know it's easy to hate on the English.

Joe Opio 22:02 Yes.

Trevor Noah 22:02 And we should because of their history.

Joe Opio 22:04 Yeah, they colonized us. Yeah.

Trevor Noah 22:04 Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have, we have scars of colonization.

Joe Opio 22:07 We, we, we, we, yeah, we-

Trevor Noah 22:08 Yes

Joe Opio 22:08 ... we owe it to our ancestors.

Trevor Noah 22:09 Of course, of course.

Joe Opio 22:10 Yes.

Trevor Noah 22:10 Of course. I mean, the language we're speaking right now is a gift from them. How can we not use it to slander them back?

Joe Opio 22:15 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 22:15 Do you know what I mean? What a waste of language that would be.

Joe Opio 22:17 They, they brought it on themselves.

Trevor Noah 22:18 You... No, we ga- they gave it to us. Before, they wouldn't have heard these things we were saying.

Joe Opio 22:22 Yes.

Trevor Noah 22:22 Now they'd be like, "Why are you talking sh- about us? Why are you talking sh-?" 'Cause you gave it to us.

Joe Opio 22:25 You gave us the power, yeah.

Trevor Noah 22:26 So you could hear. Before, it would just, it would just be sounds. So what I'm, I'm-

Joe Opio 22:30 God, don't save the Queen. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 22:33 [laughs] But wow, this guy, shots fired. No, me, I'll always say, I'll always say it. Um, well, now it's God save the King, I guess.

Joe Opio 22:40 Yes.

Trevor Noah 22:40 The, um... It's amazing how they just switched that up, eh? I always thought that was weird.

Joe Opio 22:44 Yes.

Trevor Noah 22:44 Like literally overnight, they're like-

Joe Opio 22:45 Yes

Trevor Noah 22:45 ... "All right, all right. All right, God save the King now."

Joe Opio 22:47 All right, we've, we've changed our pronouns now.

Trevor Noah 22:48 Yeah, we've changed.

Joe Opio 22:48 Yeah.

Trevor Noah 22:48 We've changed now.

Joe Opio 22:49 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 22:49 Um-

Joe Opio 22:49 We'll go back in now. Mm.

Trevor Noah 22:51 No. Let's be fair. Talent, talent, just talent-wise, England has always had extremely talented players.

Joe Opio 22:59 I beg to differ, but okay.

Trevor Noah 23:01 Wow.

Joe Opio 23:01 I think they've always had a pretty good league that's made up of players from-

Trevor Noah 23:06 Okay, Joe

Joe Opio 23:06 ... other countries.

Trevor Noah 23:07 Joe. Joe, let's, let's pause for a moment and let's-

Joe Opio 23:11 How many English players are playing-

Trevor Noah 23:12 I, okay, I think it's, I think it's fair to explain to people-

Joe Opio 23:14 How many English players-

Trevor Noah 23:14 If anyone is gonna, if anyone is watching this or listening to this-

Joe Opio 23:17 Okay

Trevor Noah 23:17 ... I think it is good for them to know that you are biased. I think it's good for them to know that you are a hater. I think it's good for them to know that you don't rate English football at all.

Joe Opio 23:28 I think it's hoof and hope.

Trevor Noah 23:29 There we go.

Joe Opio 23:30 I think it-

Trevor Noah 23:31 And in case you don't know what that is-

Joe Opio 23:33 Yes

Trevor Noah 23:33 ... a hoof is something you find on an animal, not on a human being. And so hoof and hope is Joe basically saying that English football is a bunch of cows-

Joe Opio 23:43 Or as we call it these days, hoof and inshallah. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 23:46 Yes. [laughs]

Joe Opio 23:50 No, look.

Trevor Noah 23:51 Basically. No, no, Joe. Let me set the stage. Don't defend yourself at all. I first need to explain this. You're a hater, which is good for the game.

Joe Opio 23:58 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 23:59 Haters are good in, in certain aspects. You keep people honest. You're a hater of, uh, of English players.

Joe Opio 24:07 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 24:07 You don't rate them at all.

Joe Opio 24:10 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 24:10 And so for you, for you, you're not shocked when England ever, quote-unquote, "underper-" Don't say anything. I'll let you know-

Joe Opio 24:16 Okay

Trevor Noah 24:16 ... when it's time for you to respond.

Joe Opio 24:18 Okay. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 24:18 You don't think it's ever, uh, England underperforming. You think that they're lucky to be there.

Joe Opio 24:24 Yes.

Trevor Noah 24:24 Like Make-A-Wish kids or something.

Joe Opio 24:25 Yes.

Trevor Noah 24:25 Right. Now, I'm saying England has always had some of the most talented players in the world. We can go back decades, you know?

Joe Opio 24:34 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 24:34 We can go back to, like, the generations of Scholes and, and then you can jump forward to, like, the Lampards and the Gerrards and the Beckhams, and you can, like, you can keep skipping. This current crop as well is one of the most talented group of English players we've seen

Joe Opio 24:49 Vehemently, vehemently

Trevor Noah 24:51 I'll let you know when. Con- silence

Joe Opio 24:53 Vehemently

Trevor Noah 24:54 Cone of silence

Joe Opio 24:55 All right

Trevor Noah 24:57 Well, not cone of si- si- vow of silence

Joe Opio 24:58 Okay

Trevor Noah 24:59 Vow of silence. I don't want to be in a cone with you. Um, the current English squad, though, has created a bunch of waves because the coach, uh, is it... It's not the first time, but it's like, it's one of the few times that England hasn't had an English coach

Joe Opio 25:19 Yes. The last one they had was, uh, Fabio Capello. Uh, the last time they had a non-English man as a coach

Trevor Noah 25:26 Who was- didn't they have, like, the, the, the, the, the... Who was the guy from Scandinavia, I feel like, for a moment? Sven-Göran Eriksson Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah

Joe Opio 25:33 Oh, Sven, yeah, no, no, but Sven came after Capello

Trevor Noah 25:34 He was after Capello? Okay, cool

Joe Opio 25:35 After. Uh, no, it was before Capello

Trevor Noah 25:36 Before Capello

Joe Opio 25:36 So that's why I'm saying-

Trevor Noah 25:36 All right, yeah, yeah, yeah

Joe Opio 25:37 ... the last one was Capello

Trevor Noah 25:37 Okay. Right

Joe Opio 25:38 And then, yeah

Trevor Noah 25:38 So they, but generally, they have English coaches. Now they went with, um, Thomas Tuchel because-

Joe Opio 25:44 Yeah, which-

Trevor Noah 25:44 Because things were not going right for them

Joe Opio 25:46 Yes

Trevor Noah 25:46 And then eventually-

Joe Opio 25:46 They went with a German

Trevor Noah 25:47 You-

Joe Opio 25:47 That's how badly things were going

Trevor Noah 25:49 I mean, if you want to get things done, you go with the Germans

Joe Opio 25:51 Yes

Trevor Noah 25:52 Yeah

Joe Opio 25:52 But the English tabloids didn't receive that very well-

Trevor Noah 25:54 Yeah, my man

Joe Opio 25:55 ... because

Trevor Noah 25:55 My man, my man, hey, you go with what works

Joe Opio 25:58 No, but, no, but, no, because especially when it comes to-

Trevor Noah 25:59 Made in Germany

Joe Opio 26:00 So they could, they c- they could, they could allow a Swede, they could allow an Italian, but England and Germany have such a rivalry in soccer. It's almost like if Americans named, wow, should I say an Iranian now as the coach of the American team? That's how badly they hate each other

Trevor Noah 26:16 Damn, that's another great pitch. We should do that

Joe Opio 26:18 So, yes, so England and Germany-

Trevor Noah 26:20 You're just coming up with some great ideas here.

Joe Opio 26:22 [laughs] Yes

Trevor Noah 26:22 Everything that you think is wrong and crazy-

Joe Opio 26:23 England and-

Trevor Noah 26:23 ... I want to live in that world

Joe Opio 26:25 ... they hate each other so much. And by the way, to go back to the vehement argument, I think England has modestly talented players who normally get way more hype than they deserve. There's a reason why no English player has won the Ballon d'Or since Michael Owen

Trevor Noah 26:39 Can we throw internet sounds on some of these things you're saying? Fwah, fwah, fwah, fwah

Joe Opio 26:42 No, it's-

Trevor Noah 26:43 Fwah, fwah, fwah, fwah

Joe Opio 26:44 Eng- England has always had modestly talented players, but they never-

Trevor Noah 26:47 Modestly

Joe Opio 26:48 ... yeah, they have never had, like, the most talented player of their generation

Trevor Noah 26:51 Sho

Joe Opio 26:51 You talked about Beckham and Scholes. That was the generation of Zidane and Alessandro Del Piero and Raul, and here, all these other countries had way better players. Ronaldinho, Ronaldo

Trevor Noah 27:02 This guy said way better

Joe Opio 27:03 England has never had a generation where you go like, "Oh-"

Trevor Noah 27:06 Yo, are the cameras rolling on this trash-

Joe Opio 27:08 No

Trevor Noah 27:08 ... or are we just-

Joe Opio 27:09 No, no, no, no

Trevor Noah 27:09 ... is this just me, is this just me talking to a madman in a corner?

Joe Opio 27:11 No, no, these are facts. So every time England has had a player who's good, other countries have had way more players who are way, way better. When you talk about the current generation, they have, who's the most talented player? Harry Kane. Still not the best striker in the world. Still not the best player in the world

Trevor Noah 27:25 Who's, who's a better striker? Who's a better striker than Harry Kane right now?

Joe Opio 27:28 I would say... Hmm

Trevor Noah 27:32 Elevator music

Joe Opio 27:33 No, no. Hold, hold, hold on. Look-

Trevor Noah 27:33 Blum, blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:34 ... look, look

Trevor Noah 27:34 Blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:35 Look

Trevor Noah 27:35 Blum

Joe Opio 27:36 Look

Trevor Noah 27:37 Blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:37 Look

Trevor Noah 27:37 Blum, blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:39 No, no, no

Trevor Noah 27:39 Blum, blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:40 Look

Trevor Noah 27:40 Blum, blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:41 There's, there, there's a, there's a death-

Trevor Noah 27:42 What floor would you like, sir? Blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:44 No, no, no. Listen

Trevor Noah 27:44 Blum, blum, blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:45 Listen

Trevor Noah 27:45 Blum, blum

Joe Opio 27:45 There's a, there's a death, there's a death of proper number nines in the game right now

Trevor Noah 27:49 My friend, my friend, my friend-

Joe Opio 27:50 But-

Trevor Noah 27:50 ... your, your fancy English is not gonna save you here-

Joe Opio 27:52 I'm s- I'm not- [laughs]

Trevor Noah 27:52 ... talking about a, a death

Joe Opio 27:54 But-

Trevor Noah 27:54 A death of-

Joe Opio 27:55 No, I'm saying-

Trevor Noah 27:55 Hey

Joe Opio 27:56 ... I'm saying still not the... Maybe, maybe I shouldn't, I sh- I shouldn't have said-

Trevor Noah 27:58 Just use a lot and let's keep it moving

Joe Opio 28:01 I should, I should have said, I should have said the best striker

Trevor Noah 28:01 Tell me-

Joe Opio 28:02 Yes

Trevor Noah 28:02 ... a better striker than Harry Kane right now

Joe Opio 28:04 No, no, I should, I shouldn't have said better striker. I should have said-

Trevor Noah 28:06 You-

Joe Opio 28:06 ... they are still not the best player

Trevor Noah 28:08 Tell me a better str-

Joe Opio 28:09 Still not the best player

Trevor Noah 28:10 Tell me a better striker than Harry Kane right now

Joe Opio 28:14 Good goalscorer

Trevor Noah 28:15 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Tell me-

Joe Opio 28:17 Great goalscorer

Trevor Noah 28:18 Say me who? Great-

Joe Opio 28:18 But still not the best-

Trevor Noah 28:19 Great-

Joe Opio 28:19 Not the best player in his own team

Trevor Noah 28:21 Great, great goalscorer. Is he from Peru?

Joe Opio 28:22 Yes

Trevor Noah 28:22 Who's that?

Joe Opio 28:22 No, no, no, I'm saying-

Trevor Noah 28:23 I don't, I'm not familiar with that name

Joe Opio 28:24 Listen, listen. Harry Kane

Trevor Noah 28:25 Who, who's great goalscorer?

Joe Opio 28:26 Harry Kane-

Trevor Noah 28:27 Maybe the way you're pronouncing it is throwing me off

Joe Opio 28:28 ... Harry Kane-

Trevor Noah 28:29 Great, great goalscorer. Is he Greek?

Joe Opio 28:30 Still not-

Trevor Noah 28:30 Who's great, great, great-

Joe Opio 28:31 ... the best player in his own team

Trevor Noah 28:32 Great goalscorer-

Joe Opio 28:33 He score, he sc- he scored a hat full of goals, but when it come to choosing the best player-

Trevor Noah 28:35 You see what-

Joe Opio 28:35 ... the Bundesliga

Trevor Noah 28:36 ... you see what you've just done here?

Joe Opio 28:37 Okay

Trevor Noah 28:37 What you've just done here is something that I'm glad we do not see in football. You have just moved the goalposts

Joe Opio 28:43 Shifted

Trevor Noah 28:43 That's what you've done, Joe

Joe Opio 28:44 All I'm saying-

Trevor Noah 28:45 That is what you have done, Joe

Joe Opio 28:46 No, all I'm saying is-

Trevor Noah 28:46 Harry Kane-

Joe Opio 28:47 Yes

Trevor Noah 28:48 ... I asked you the question

Joe Opio 28:49 Yes

Trevor Noah 28:49 Respond to me

Joe Opio 28:50 Yes

Trevor Noah 28:51 Who is a better striker than Harry Kane right now?

Joe Opio 28:53 He's, right now-

Trevor Noah 28:55 Ah

Joe Opio 28:55 ... I struggle to, I struggle to think of a better striker, but he's still not the best player in the world.

Trevor Noah 28:59 [laughs]

Joe Opio 28:59 Not even top three. No, not even top three. He's not the best player at Bayern Munich-

Trevor Noah 29:04 Oh, my man

Joe Opio 29:05 ... in his own club

Trevor Noah 29:06 My man

Joe Opio 29:06 And that's what I keep talking about. So Michael Olise voted Bundesliga Player of the Year

Trevor Noah 29:09 Yo, my man, my man, my man

Joe Opio 29:10 Lamine Yamal-

Trevor Noah 29:11 Joe, Joe, Joe

Joe Opio 29:11 ... a far better player than Harry Kane

Trevor Noah 29:12 Joe, wait, wait, Joe. I see that you're spiraling, and I understand why.

Joe Opio 29:17 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 29:17 Okay, I understand it

Joe Opio 29:18 Okay. Let's talk about-

Trevor Noah 29:18 As a hater, as a hater-

Joe Opio 29:20 Let's talk about, let's talk about the English league, okay

Trevor Noah 29:20 ... I understand haters. I understand haters. I'm saying this team in every position-

Joe Opio 29:27 Okay

Trevor Noah 29:27 ... has somebody who can hurt you. Do not sleep on Bukayo Saka

Joe Opio 29:33 Still not anywhere near the best winger in the game

Trevor Noah 29:35 Hey, my friend, my friend, do not sleep on that boy

Joe Opio 29:38 Okay

Trevor Noah 29:38 He will hurt you

Joe Opio 29:39 Okay

Trevor Noah 29:39 Okay? Do not sleep on that boy

Joe Opio 29:41 Struggles to beat his man every time

Trevor Noah 29:43 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

Joe Opio 29:44 He's not Lamine Yamal

Trevor Noah 29:45 Hey, my man

Joe Opio 29:46 He's not Khvicha Kvaratskhelia. He's not Dembele

Trevor Noah 29:49 By the way, how do we say that guy's name?

Joe Opio 29:50 He's not Khvicha Kvaratskhelia

Trevor Noah 29:52 Ah, d- try again I don't know if that is right, Joe

Joe Opio 29:54 Khvicha Kvaratskhelia

Trevor Noah 29:56 S- try it again

Joe Opio 29:57 Khvicha Kvaratskhelia

Trevor Noah 29:59 I think you've said it three-

Joe Opio 30:00 And Neymar [laughs]

Trevor Noah 30:00 I think you've said it three different ways three different times

Joe Opio 30:01 Hey, the guy's from... Let him, let him try saying my name.

Trevor Noah 30:04 [laughs]

Joe Opio 30:04 He's from Georgia. In fairness, let him try saying my name-

Trevor Noah 30:06 No, what I'm saying is, like-

Joe Opio 30:07 At least I tried

Trevor Noah 30:07 ... no, I'm saying every single commentator says his name differently

Joe Opio 30:10 Yes, says it very differently. Yes

Trevor Noah 30:10 I've heard some commentators say K- Kvaratskhelia

Joe Opio 30:13 Yes

Trevor Noah 30:14 And then I've heard some commentators say Kvaratskhelia

Joe Opio 30:16 Yes

Trevor Noah 30:16 And then I've heard some commentators say, like, Kvaratskhelia

Joe Opio 30:19 Yes

Trevor Noah 30:19 I, so I don't know how anyone says his name. I've never heard. But he's not in the World Cup, so it doesn't matter.

Joe Opio 30:23 Yes

Trevor Noah 30:23 The point is England. Let's go back to England

Joe Opio 30:24 Okay, let's talk about England. Yes

Trevor Noah 30:24 England, so England has, um, put forward their team. Um, one of the biggest things that's come out is people saying, especially the English press, saying that this was a terrible selection because some of the most prominent English players were omitted

Joe Opio 30:39 Creative player

Trevor Noah 30:39 So, uh, off the top of my head, players that they feel were omitted, um, Phil Foden from Manchester City

Joe Opio 30:44 Yes

Trevor Noah 30:45 Um-

Joe Opio 30:46 Cole Palmer

Trevor Noah 30:46 Cole Palmer from Chelsea

Joe Opio 30:48 And of course, Trent Alexander-Arnold

Trevor Noah 30:49 Uh, Maguire

Trevor Noah 30:50 from Manchester United, Harry Maguire Uh, Luke Shaw from Manchester United. Wait, wait, who else? Who has left out? Who's-

Joe Opio 30:56 Trent Alexander-Arnold

Trevor Noah 30:57 ... Trent Alexander-Arnold from Real Madrid.

Joe Opio 30:59 Can I just say, if as a nation you're lamenting Maguire not making the team, you're already not in a good starting place.

Trevor Noah 31:05 [laughs]

Joe Opio 31:05 Let me just say that. If as a nation you're bemoaning and making noise because Maguire isn't on the plane-

Trevor Noah 31:13 [laughs]

Joe Opio 31:14 ... you're already starting from a losing position. And I'll say, I'll say this, yeah.

Trevor Noah 31:22 [laughs] This guy. Yo, man.

Joe Opio 31:24 I, I, I'll, I'll say this. The selection, very controversial.

Trevor Noah 31:28 Yeah.

Joe Opio 31:28 Actually, so many in the English press, especially the tabloids, think, uh, Thomas Tuchel is [laughs] a German double agent sent to sabotage England from-

Trevor Noah 31:37 Is that what they're saying?

Joe Opio 31:37 From inside. Yes, 'cause they're saying, "Oh, you left out the best players we have." I think the selection made sense.

Trevor Noah 31:42 Okay, I, here's the thing I don't understand.

Joe Opio 31:43 I think the selection made-

Trevor Noah 31:44 Here, so here's a ... Let's go through this. Let's go through this ourselves, right?

Joe Opio 31:47 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 31:47 Because, I mean, if we're honest-

Joe Opio 31:48 Mm

Trevor Noah 31:48 ... we are probably the foremost experts in football in the world, right? We don't, we don't like to toot our own horn, but we are.

Joe Opio 31:55 We love the beautiful game, yeah.

Trevor Noah 31:56 We are.

Joe Opio 31:56 Mm.

Trevor Noah 31:56 So let's talk about the players who-

Joe Opio 31:59 Who are left out

Trevor Noah 32:00 ... who are left out.

Joe Opio 32:00 Mm.

Trevor Noah 32:01 And agree or disagree about why they should've been left out. So Phil Foden. I love Phil Foden. I think he's one of the most talented players in the world, but we cannot deny that Phil Foden has had a wishy-washy season.

Joe Opio 32:14 Yes.

Trevor Noah 32:14 Far from his best.

Joe Opio 32:15 Yes.

Trevor Noah 32:15 Right? And, and I'm gonna go on the record and say I blame the Manchester City system. My opinion is because Manchester City has so many players and so many options, when you experience a dip, you're just on the bench immediately.

Joe Opio 32:29 Pep kicks you out, yes.

Trevor Noah 32:30 Right? Pep Guardiola can just put you on-

Joe Opio 32:31 Oh.

Trevor Noah 32:31 'Cause he can afford to-

Joe Opio 32:32 Yes, definitely

Trevor Noah 32:32 ... put you on a bench. Other teams can't afford that, right? So if you're playing for, you know, Liverpool, Manchester United, Arsenal, any of them, if you're having a bad game, you're having a bad game, and then if you have another bad game, you have another bad game because they don't-

Joe Opio 32:47 Because they can't bench anybody, yes

Trevor Noah 32:47 ... they don't have a whole-

Joe Opio 32:48 Mm

Trevor Noah 32:49 ... first team sitting on the bench like Manchester City does.

Joe Opio 32:51 Mm.

Trevor Noah 32:51 So Pep benches you as Foden, I think it does two things to you. One, mentally it messes with you because you go, "My mistakes are punishable-

Joe Opio 33:00 Yes

Trevor Noah 33:00 ... in, in a really big way. Number two, it also means you don't get to rectify the mistake.

Joe Opio 33:06 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 33:07 So in the next game-

Joe Opio 33:07 You don't get a chance. Yes

Trevor Noah 33:07 ... you're not there. And then if they win, you don't play again.

Joe Opio 33:09 Yes, it's like-

Trevor Noah 33:10 And if they win, you don't play again.

Joe Opio 33:10 Yes. It's like if you swipe right on a girl-

Trevor Noah 33:12 You're really swiping right.

Joe Opio 33:13 And then you go-

Trevor Noah 33:13 What's happened to your dating?

Joe Opio 33:14 Yes, and then you go-

Trevor Noah 33:14 What's going w- why is everything about dating?

Joe Opio 33:15 They discover a- discover this thing called apps, and then you go on a first date-

Trevor Noah 33:18 This guy. You know, he's like a-

Joe Opio 33:19 ... and then you mess up

Trevor Noah 33:19 ... yo, this guy's like a-

Joe Opio 33:20 And then [laughs]

Trevor Noah 33:20 ... it, it's like we found some guy-

Joe Opio 33:21 And then [laughs]

Trevor Noah 33:22 ... like, it's like some guy just came to America, and the first thing they introduced him to were dating apps.

Joe Opio 33:26 Oh, I'm loving the 12.

Trevor Noah 33:27 Everything is swiping right here.

Joe Opio 33:28 Ooh. In Africa, I had to walk five miles-

Trevor Noah 33:29 To, to, to swipe

Joe Opio 33:30 ... to find a girl, and now I just swipe. Yes.

Trevor Noah 33:31 You have to walk five miles, and then you swipe right. [laughs]

Joe Opio 33:33 I swipe, yes, physically. Oh, I'm loving the 12.

Trevor Noah 33:35 So, so, so what I'm saying is this.

Joe Opio 33:36 I think, I think even beyond Pep Guardiola, for me-

Trevor Noah 33:38 Yeah

Joe Opio 33:38 ... even if Phil Foden had not had a wishy-washy season-

Trevor Noah 33:41 Yeah

Joe Opio 33:42 ... he still, he has never delivered in an English shirt. He has never.

Trevor Noah 33:44 Yeah, but that's not the point. But that's not the point though. I think, I think the point is should he ... I, I think we, we're both agreeing-

Joe Opio 33:51 Mm

Trevor Noah 33:51 ... that it, when you look at the other players, it doesn't make s- it does make sense that Phil Foden-

Joe Opio 33:55 For you to be left out. Yes

Trevor Noah 33:55 ... got left behind, unfortunately. Um, Cole Palmer. Yo, man, he-

Joe Opio 33:59 Same exact here.

Trevor Noah 34:00 Yeah, but he's one of the most ... I mean, he's, he's just, he's a game changer.

Joe Opio 34:06 Yes.

Trevor Noah 34:06 You know?

Joe Opio 34:07 He can turn it on any time.

Trevor Noah 34:08 Cole Palmer is one of those players who can create everything out of nothing.

Joe Opio 34:13 Mm.

Trevor Noah 34:14 Every time he touches a ball, you don't know what'll happen.

Joe Opio 34:17 He's unpredictable. Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 34:18 He's unpredictable. But ever since the injury-

Joe Opio 34:20 Yes

Trevor Noah 34:20 ... he hasn't been the same, and he's been struggling.

Joe Opio 34:22 Yes.

Trevor Noah 34:23 I think it's just a case of, like, injury at the wrong time.

Joe Opio 34:26 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 34:26 That, that's all it is.

Joe Opio 34:27 Yes.

Trevor Noah 34:27 So i- it makes sense that he's-

Joe Opio 34:28 Worst season ever. Yes

Trevor Noah 34:29 ... that he's out. Okay, let's talk about Harry Maguire. Who did they pick instead of Harry Maguire?

Joe Opio 34:34 I think they're going to go with, uh, Marc Guehi. They're going to go with Dan Burn from Newcastle.

Trevor Noah 34:40 Yeah.

Joe Opio 34:40 When you look at their, um, at the people they have in defense, I think Maguire was harshly done by.

Trevor Noah 34:47 He was harshly done.

Joe Opio 34:48 I think he should have made ... He has ... If you, if, if you're using form as the metric-

Trevor Noah 34:53 Yeah

Joe Opio 34:53 ... Maguire should've been on the plane.

Trevor Noah 34:54 Yeah, because, okay, look, I can see why Marc Guehi and, um-

Joe Opio 34:58 Dan Burn and-

Trevor Noah 34:59 And Dan Burn will get in ahead of him, but I don't get why he's not in the squad.

Joe Opio 35:05 That's, that's, that, that's the argument.

Trevor Noah 35:06 Because, because who else is there in the squad? Surely you can take more than two center-backs with you.

Joe Opio 35:09 Yeah. No, no, they have ... They, they, they have way more center-backs. I th- but the thing is-

Trevor Noah 35:13 Who, who else? Yo, Ryan, who else is in the, is in, is in the squad?

Joe Opio 35:15 Jarral Quansah.

Trevor Noah 35:17 Yeah, Jarral Quansah instead of-

Joe Opio 35:18 Yeah, the Liverpool player who went on loan-

Trevor Noah 35:19 ... Jed Spence

Joe Opio 35:20 ... who went on loan to Bayer Leverkusen. Yeah.

Trevor Noah 35:20 Yeah, but Jed Spence is a, is a, is a full back.

Joe Opio 35:22 He's a, he's a, yeah, he's a full back. But I'm saying Jarral Quansah, the fact that Jarral Quansah made it on the team and Maguire didn't, that's why I think it was hard them-

Trevor Noah 35:29 No, but now, okay, now I'll be fair to Jarral- But Jarral Quansah's name was used also to keep Trent out of the equation by Thomas Tuchel. He said-

Joe Opio 35:36 L-

Trevor Noah 35:36 ... "We don't need Trent because we have people like Jarral Quansah who can play both-

Joe Opio 35:39 No, yeah

Trevor Noah 35:39 ... positions."

Joe Opio 35:39 Yeah, who are versatile, who can play both. But, uh, but also now this takes me to the point I wanted to make about this England team. The players who bet on themselves, the players who stepped out of the comfort zone that's England in a way-

Trevor Noah 35:50 Yeah

Joe Opio 35:51 ... ended up benefiting. So I'll start with Marcus Rashford. He went to Barcelona, ended up getting on the plane.

Trevor Noah 35:57 I knew you were gonna bring him up 'cause of Barcelona.

Joe Opio 35:58 I'll start, I'll, I'll, I'll give you another one. Jarral Quansah left England, went to Bayer Leverkusen, ended up playing, ended up getting on the plane. Uh, who's the other player? Noni Madueke left Chelsea, went to Arsenal, ended up going on the plane, while Cole Palmer didn't. Another player, Ivan Toney, left the continent, went to Saudi Arabia, gambled big on himself, bet big on him-

Trevor Noah 36:23 Do you include Noni Madueke? He went from London to London.

Joe Opio 36:27 Yeah, but he went from a team where, you know, this is his boyhood club.

Trevor Noah 36:30 Okay. Wait, wait. Okay, so-

Joe Opio 36:31 I'm sa- I'm saying-

Trevor Noah 36:31 Let's, let's amend your statement then.

Joe Opio 36:33 Yes.

Trevor Noah 36:33 So you're saying all the players-

Joe Opio 36:35 The players who bet there

Trevor Noah 36:35 ... okay, the players who moved-

Joe Opio 36:36 Yes

Trevor Noah 36:36 ... and bet on themselves to try something different-

Joe Opio 36:38 Yes. To get more minutes, to-

Trevor Noah 36:40 Yeah, yeah. They, they have all-

Joe Opio 36:42 Yes

Trevor Noah 36:42 ... s- succeeded.

Joe Opio 36:42 Yeah, they go- all benefited. Ivan Toney, people thought his career was over.

Trevor Noah 36:46 Wait, Ivan Toney's in the squad?

Joe Opio 36:47 He's in the squad, yes.

Trevor Noah 36:48 Oh, I didn't know that, actually.

Joe Opio 36:48 People thought his career was over. He made a big bet, moved-

Trevor Noah 36:51 He's made, definitely made big bets.

Joe Opio 36:52 Yes. And some person can even bet on his games.

Trevor Noah 36:54 [laughs] He's definitely made big bets.

Joe Opio 36:56 In Saudi Arabia. Yes.

Trevor Noah 36:56 By the way, I wanna go on the record and say, as you know, I'm not a fan of sports betting. However- I think players should be allowed to bet on themselves. I see no reason that a player shouldn't be allowed to bet on themselves winning. I see no reason.

Joe Opio 37:10 I see a conflict though.

Trevor Noah 37:11 No, bro, what's the conflict? What's the conflict? I'm going into a match.

Joe Opio 37:17 Okay.

Trevor Noah 37:17 I go to the bookies and I say, "I bet you I'm gonna win this match." What's the conflict? You shouldn't be allowed to bet against yourself.

Joe Opio 37:25 Against yourself, yes.

Trevor Noah 37:26 And you shouldn't be allowed to bet on other teams-

Joe Opio 37:27 No, but I think it's a slippery-

Trevor Noah 37:28 ... 'cause you may have information

Joe Opio 37:29 I think it's a slippery slope argument.

Trevor Noah 37:31 People always talk-

Joe Opio 37:31 'Cause-

Trevor Noah 37:31 ... about slippery slopes like we're in Diddy's parties here

Joe Opio 37:33 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 37:33 Hey, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. Guys.

Joe Opio 37:37 You make it seem like Diddy actually had a literal slope with like baby oil and people just-

Trevor Noah 37:41 He definitely did, my friend

Joe Opio 37:42 No.

Trevor Noah 37:42 My- I'm saying this. I'm saying this

Joe Opio 37:43 No, the thing i- the thing is if you ke- if you allow players to bet on games, whether for or against themselves, then it's just going to spiral. 'Cause betting-

Trevor Noah 37:52 How can it spiral?

Joe Opio 37:52 ... by its very nature. No, betting by its very nature means you get more addicted to winning. So how are we going to control... You might start out betting on yourself, and maybe you don't score the goals you wanted to score, and then you end up betting. It's-

Trevor Noah 38:07 No.

Joe Opio 38:07 I see the argument.

Trevor Noah 38:07 Guys, we make a simple system where players can bet publicly on themselves.

Joe Opio 38:14 And then privately?

Trevor Noah 38:16 You're not allowed to bet privately. The same way it is now.

Joe Opio 38:20 But then why not just-

Trevor Noah 38:22 Because in my world-

Joe Opio 38:23 Okay

Trevor Noah 38:23 ... I think a player who goes, "My salary is not that high. Maybe I'm not one of the top-

Joe Opio 38:29 There's no soccer players saying that

Trevor Noah 38:29 ... earning players in the world." No, no, no, no, no. They go like, "I, I wanna bet on myself. I'm, I bet that I'm gonna do it this game." Why aren't they allowed to do that?

Joe Opio 38:38 Because what if they don't score? I- if he says, "I'm going to score a hat trick," and doesn't score a hat trick.

Trevor Noah 38:43 That's h- then he's lost his money.

Joe Opio 38:44 No, but come on. Then the repercussions, mental health, and then-

Trevor Noah 38:47 Yo, you bet

Joe Opio 38:49 ... he's going to recoup, he's going to recoup that. He's going to try to recoup that money somehow.

Trevor Noah 38:51 Yo. Why? Why can they not bet on themselves?

Joe Opio 38:54 I like how you make it seem like-

Trevor Noah 38:55 Why can a team take sports bets and they can't?

Joe Opio 38:57 I like how Trevor makes it seem like sports bettors actually have control. Most of them have no control. That's why they're betting in the first place. So they'll start out good faith betting on themselves, and then if they lose enough times, you know what they're going to do?

Trevor Noah 39:09 Okay, okay, so what you're saying is-

Joe Opio 39:10 Yeah

Trevor Noah 39:10 ... you're saying we're doing this to protect them.

Joe Opio 39:12 Yes.

Trevor Noah 39:12 I can accept that argument.

Joe Opio 39:13 Yes.

Trevor Noah 39:13 'Cause I'm against sport bet- sports betting, so I can accept this argument.

Joe Opio 39:15 You didn't sound like you were against sports betting.

Trevor Noah 39:17 No, no, no, no. I-

Joe Opio 39:17 You sounded like a mouthpiece-

Trevor Noah 39:19 What I'm-

Joe Opio 39:19 ... for FanDuel and DraftKings-

Trevor Noah 39:20 [laughs]

Joe Opio 39:21 ... at the same time. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 39:23 No.

Joe Opio 39:24 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 39:24 What I'm saying is this: I don't understand how you can have a system that then excludes one part. Because I'm accept- the reason you've beaten me in this, and the reason I'm accepting defeat in this argument, is because you used the elements of sports betting that I'm against.

Joe Opio 39:40 Yes.

Trevor Noah 39:40 It's addictive.

Joe Opio 39:41 Yes.

Trevor Noah 39:41 It's a spiral.

Joe Opio 39:42 Yes.

Trevor Noah 39:42 It takes you down a rabbit hole. That's, that's why you've won. Do you get what I'm saying? But I'm saying if we are going to allow sports betting to exist, why don't we let the players bet on them- that's all I was saying.

Joe Opio 39:53 If human being-

Trevor Noah 39:54 But-

Joe Opio 39:54 If human beings were robots without emotions-

Trevor Noah 39:57 Yeah, but I'm saying it's-

Joe Opio 39:58 ... we can't sp-

Trevor Noah 39:58 So I'm saying if it's not good for the players, why is it good for the people?

Joe Opio 40:00 'Cause then that's one way for the people to be invested. They can't play. They can't get the rush from playing the games.

Trevor Noah 40:05 So they must get it by being broke and losing their houses.

Joe Opio 40:08 By trying to win something.

Trevor Noah 40:10 See, you-

Joe Opio 40:10 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 40:10 It sounds like you are a lobbyist for DraftKings and-

Joe Opio 40:13 You know, the funny thing-

Trevor Noah 40:13 ... and FanDuel and all of them

Joe Opio 40:15 Be- before we even move on, you know the funny thing about England? The funny thing, the thing I love about England as it is now, as you said, I'm a hater. The thing I love about England is the English media, who are notorious, by the way, for always picking a scapegoat-

Trevor Noah 40:29 Yeah, they are

Joe Opio 40:29 ... who's always Black every time they don't perform, are, are caught in a very interesting spot. Because they don't want... They want Tuchel to succeed because he's coaching the English team.

Trevor Noah 40:39 But?

Joe Opio 40:40 But then if he succeeds, he'll get a knighthood.

Trevor Noah 40:43 [inhales]

Joe Opio 40:43 And there's nothing worse for an Englishman than to feel like they owe something to a German. So I, I just want to see how that will play out, 'cause if Tuchel doesn't succeed, then they're going to frog march him out of-

Trevor Noah 40:55 Of course.

Joe Opio 40:55 Yes.

Trevor Noah 40:56 Of course.

Joe Opio 40:56 They're going to Brexit him. They would love that, but then they would also love him to win, but then that comes with such a huge payoff and such a huge debt.

Trevor Noah 41:07 What do you, what do you think their chances are?

Joe Opio 41:09 I think-

Trevor Noah 41:09 How far do you think, how far do you see them getting in this tournament?

Joe Opio 41:11 I think England are going to struggle in the opening games. They always do struggle in the op-

Trevor Noah 41:14 Wait, wait, okay.

Joe Opio 41:14 Yeah.

Trevor Noah 41:14 So who are the games? We have-

Joe Opio 41:16 They always know. I, I alwa- I always know. I don't... Whether they're playing Uganda, whether they're playing the US-

Trevor Noah 41:21 Who do we have? Yeah

Joe Opio 41:21 ... whether they're playing, they always struggle in the opening games, but then they'll make it deep. They'll make a deep run. And I think then they will-

Trevor Noah 41:27 Ryan, who's the, who are the, um... Who's England playing against in their, in their opening games? What's the group stages? I'll have a look for you. 'Cause I, depending on who it is, 'cause one thing England does really well is they thrash small teams.

Joe Opio 41:40 No, they don't actually.

Trevor Noah 41:41 What are you talking about?

Joe Opio 41:42 In the World Cup, they always struggle.

Trevor Noah 41:43 Oh, in the World Cup they struggle.

Joe Opio 41:44 They always struggle.

Trevor Noah 41:44 England, Croatia.

Joe Opio 41:45 They always struggle.

Trevor Noah 41:46 Oh, that's-

Joe Opio 41:46 Yeah, that's, yeah

Trevor Noah 41:47 ... that's tough. England, Ghana. Didn't... Wait, wait, wait, wait. England, Croatia. Didn't Croatia beat England in Qatar?

Joe Opio 41:52 No, in Qatar they were beaten by, uh, France. Harry Kane missed a penalty last minute.

Trevor Noah 41:56 No, no, what do you mean?

Joe Opio 41:57 In Qatar, yeah. Harry Kane missed a penalty last minute, and France dumped them out. Croatia-

Trevor Noah 42:03 What?

Joe Opio 42:03 ... Croatia was beaten by Argentina 3-0.

Trevor Noah 42:06 Oh.

Joe Opio 42:07 Yes. The thing is, England al-

Trevor Noah 42:08 Croatia did beat a big team, though. I can't remember right now.

Joe Opio 42:10 Yeah, England always struggles.

Trevor Noah 42:12 Wait, wait, wait, wait. What game? We were at a game where England was up 1-0. It was a knockout game. Who were they playing?

Joe Opio 42:18 They were playing France. Olivier Giroud equalized.

Trevor Noah 42:21 And then they tried to-

Joe Opio 42:22 Yes, and then-

Trevor Noah 42:22 Was that, was that a France game?

Joe Opio 42:23 Yeah, France. France took a 2-

Trevor Noah 42:25 Oh, damn

Joe Opio 42:25 ... a 2-1 lead. Harry Kane missed a penalty.

Trevor Noah 42:27 Oh, damn.

Joe Opio 42:27 That famous English mentality, folding and folding-

Trevor Noah 42:31 [laughs]

Joe Opio 42:31 ... when the pressure is on. The-

Trevor Noah 42:33 Okay, so who else? Uh, England who?

Joe Opio 42:35 I feel like England are the-

Trevor Noah 42:35 And then Ghana.

Joe Opio 42:36 Yes.

Trevor Noah 42:36 The second match. Okay, so England, Ghana, that's the second match. That can also be a anything can happen game with Ghana.

Joe Opio 42:45 They could be out two games in. That would be a dream scenario for me. [laughs] But no, but England always, England always struggle, but they always make it through.

Trevor Noah 42:50 Okay, wait, wait, wait.

Joe Opio 42:51 Always make it through.

Trevor Noah 42:52 But wait, but wait. Those are two games they could easily lose.

Joe Opio 42:54 Yes.

Trevor Noah 42:54 Yeah, they could.

Joe Opio 42:54 That's what I'm saying.

Trevor Noah 42:54 They could lose or draw them. The final game's against Panama. That they should win.

Joe Opio 42:58 They will struggle. England always struggle when they are the favorites 'Cause they don't have-

Trevor Noah 43:03 But they're always the favorites

Joe Opio 43:04 ... they don't have, no, no-

Trevor Noah 43:05 But they're not favorites this year

Joe Opio 43:06 ... they don't know how to, no, no. When they're playing against a team which is an underdog, 'cause they don't know how to break down low blocks. When a team sits back and defends-

Trevor Noah 43:14 Yeah

Joe Opio 43:14 ... England always struggles 'cause they don't have the tools to break down a low block team.

Trevor Noah 43:19 Damn.

Joe Opio 43:19 So I think, I think they'll make it to the knockout rounds, but there's always going to be, with England, there's always drama 'cause if they lose o- their opening game to Croatia, then the tabloids are going to fire up. You know what-

Trevor Noah 43:28 Yeah, yeah

Joe Opio 43:28 ... the tabloids do

Trevor Noah 43:29 It's on. No, it's on.

Joe Opio 43:29 It's going to be crisis-

Trevor Noah 43:30 It's on

Joe Opio 43:30 ... all hands on deck.

Trevor Noah 43:31 The Eng- the English media takes for granted how detrimental they are to the English game.

Joe Opio 43:37 Incredibly detrimental. Yeah

Trevor Noah 43:38 Like, I don't understand how they think the team will win when they are constantly bombarded with some of the most negative rhetoric-

Joe Opio 43:47 No, they do-

Trevor Noah 43:47 ... ever

Joe Opio 43:47 ... they do what tabloids do. They build you up. So pre-tournament, they go like, "We're going to win. It's coming home."

Trevor Noah 43:52 Yeah, yeah.

Joe Opio 43:52 "England are the favorites."

Trevor Noah 43:53 And then they try to give you-

Joe Opio 43:53 "We have the best team, the most talented team."

Trevor Noah 43:55 Then they try to bring you down.

Joe Opio 43:56 Then the moment there's a setback, they jump onto the team, and I think that's going to happen. It happens every World Cup, but I think this time England are going to make it. They always make it deep-

Trevor Noah 44:06 Wow

Joe Opio 44:06 ... into the knockouts, but then they always, always struggle. [laughs] They always, always struggle when the pressure is on.

Trevor Noah 44:14 Okay. We'll see.

Joe Opio 44:15 It's been the English curse, like, since 1966.

Trevor Noah 44:18 I mean, you know, there's, there's players-

Joe Opio 44:20 Mm

Trevor Noah 44:20 ... that I love in the team, so I, I hope they at least do well, but I mean-

Joe Opio 44:25 I like it-

Trevor Noah 44:26 I want Ghana to go through in that group

Joe Opio 44:27 ... I like it, I like it when they win enough games that they have just enough hope, and then it all comes-

Trevor Noah 44:32 To have it all taken away

Joe Opio 44:33 ... crashing down, and then you watch the media melt down.

Trevor Noah 44:36 Shame, man.

Joe Opio 44:36 I love it. Oof.

Trevor Noah 44:37 It's a big one.

Joe Opio 44:38 I almost love it more than the World Cup.

Trevor Noah 44:40 You know what you probably love-

Joe Opio 44:42 Mm

Trevor Noah 44:42 ... is how the Spanish team snubbed all the Real Madrid players.

Joe Opio 44:46 They had a terrible season. They, none of them deserve to make it. Which Madrid player ma-... Also, also I like how they make it seem-

Trevor Noah 44:50 I love, I love, I love how-

Joe Opio 44:51 No

Trevor Noah 44:51 ... you see, let's just pause for a second there, Joe-

Joe Opio 44:54 Okay. Mm

Trevor Noah 44:54 ... and look at how, look at how your face changed. You got, you, you, you tried to fake it, and you were like, you were like, "Hmm, hmm." You were like, "Oh, they had a terrible season, and they, um..." You don't think a single Real Madrid player-

Joe Opio 45:07 None of them

Trevor Noah 45:07 ... deserved to be called up to the Spanish team.

Joe Opio 45:08 Also, the thing, the thing people forget is that Real Madrid doesn't have those many Spanish players.

Trevor Noah 45:12 Okay, actually, no, that's-

Joe Opio 45:13 Mm

Trevor Noah 45:13 ... a good argument. Yeah, because you've got Mbappe, you've got Vinicius. Who plays on the right these days?

Joe Opio 45:18 The team is filled, it, it was Rodrigo-

Trevor Noah 45:20 'Cause Rodrigo got injured

Joe Opio 45:21 ... who got injured. Then they tried, I think Arda Güler there. It, they don't-

Trevor Noah 45:24 And Carre- Carreira's, Carreira's playing.

Joe Opio 45:26 Carreira's had a terrible season. He was playing left-back.

Trevor Noah 45:27 And who's, uh, who's the Argentinian boy? Mascas, uh-

Joe Opio 45:29 Yeah, Mastantuono.

Trevor Noah 45:30 Yeah, Mastantuono.

Joe Opio 45:31 Yes.

Trevor Noah 45:31 Yes. He-

Joe Opio 45:32 They don't have-

Trevor Noah 45:32 Okay, he's Argentinian

Joe Opio 45:33 ... they, they never have, the Real Madrid team, when you look at it, it's always like it feels lucky when they have two Spanish players in there.

Trevor Noah 45:39 Yeah, you're not wrong.

Joe Opio 45:39 'Cause they had Din Hansen-

Trevor Noah 45:41 Y- yeah

Joe Opio 45:41 ... who then had a dip in form, which means now he was replaced by Militao and Rudiger. So they don't even have any Spa-

Trevor Noah 45:49 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Joe Opio 45:49 Dani Carvajal is too old.

Trevor Noah 45:51 Yeah.

Joe Opio 45:51 And he was replaced by Trent Alexander-Arnold in the team. So I don't know why Madrid fans are saying-

Trevor Noah 45:56 Yeah, those don't sound-

Joe Opio 45:57 I don't, I don't know why they're surprised

Trevor Noah 45:58 ... no, you're not wrong. Those don't-

Joe Opio 45:58 Yes, and, and they had a terrible season on top of that

Trevor Noah 46:00 ... those don't seem like snubs for me, actually.

Joe Opio 46:02 Yes. So I th- I-

Trevor Noah 46:03 They don't, they don't seem like snubs at all

Joe Opio 46:04 ... I think the thing Madrid fans don't like is the fact that way too many Barcelona players ended up making it. But then Barcelona had the best season, a- and Barcelona plays way more Spanish players. So-

Trevor Noah 46:16 No, uh, it makes sense

Joe Opio 46:17 ... it makes sort of sense, yes.

Trevor Noah 46:18 It, it makes complete sense.

Joe Opio 46:19 But it's the first time in decades that Madrid hasn't had a representative to the Spanish team, and that I think is a damning indictment. [upbeat music]

Trevor Noah 46:28 Don't go anywhere 'cause we got more What Now? after this. [upbeat music]

Joe Opio 46:39 But I think that's the funny thing about this World Cup is almost every call-up, every selection

Joe Opio 46:45 has had so much drama. You know, you have England, you have Spain, you have Germany. You know what's happening in Germany?

Trevor Noah 46:52 Well, I mean, German drama-

Joe Opio 46:53 With the goalkeeping situation, yes

Trevor Noah 46:54 ... with Neuer.

Joe Opio 46:55 Yes.

Trevor Noah 46:55 I don't get why that's a drama. I'll be honest.

Joe Opio 46:57 He retired. Sat out the qualifiers.

Trevor Noah 47:00 Yeah.

Joe Opio 47:00 Another goalkeeper had to actually go through the qualifiers.

Trevor Noah 47:03 So what?

Joe Opio 47:04 Did a good game, did, did, did, did a good job, and now Neuer comes back, and he's going to play in the World Cup.

Trevor Noah 47:09 Yeah, but-

Joe Opio 47:09 And then the keeper who helped them qualify-

Trevor Noah 47:11 But Neuer, Neuer was fantastic with Bayern Munich.

Joe Opio 47:13 Yes, but I'm saying if I-

Trevor Noah 47:13 The, the keeper, it, let me ask you this. The keeper who helped them qualify, is he in the squad?

Joe Opio 47:17 Yes.

Trevor Noah 47:17 Then that's fine.

Joe Opio 47:18 But he was supposed to be guaranteed-

Trevor Noah 47:20 Joe

Joe Opio 47:20 ... a starting role.

Trevor Noah 47:20 Joe, it's fine.

Joe Opio 47:24 Trevor.

Trevor Noah 47:24 Joe.

Joe Opio 47:25 Think of it this way.

Trevor Noah 47:26 Joe, Joe, Joe, if you bring another Tinder analogy here, my man-

Joe Opio 47:29 If I swipe right-

Trevor Noah 47:30 I'm gonna swipe, I'm gonna swipe left on you, eh

Joe Opio 47:31 ... if I swipe right on this girl, and then I take her on a date, and I treat her very, very well, and she says, "I had an amazing time," and then she goes like, "Your place or mine?" And I go like, "Oh, my place," and then we go back to my place, and then my friend who was discouraging me from actually swiping right on this girl goes like, "Now it's my time to shine," as you sit in the cock chair, it just feels unfair.

Trevor Noah 47:53 So let's, let's-

Joe Opio 47:54 The goalkeeper is this

Trevor Noah 47:55 ... let's improve on this analogy. Let's make it better. Your friend said that he's out of the dating pool.

Joe Opio 48:01 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:02 Okay. You went on a date.

Joe Opio 48:03 He said-

Trevor Noah 48:04 Your friend said, "I'm out of the date. I'm not dating-

Joe Opio 48:05 Yes

Trevor Noah 48:05 ... anymore." But outside the restaurant window, your friend was breakdancing.

Joe Opio 48:13 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:13 Your friend was doing things.

Joe Opio 48:14 My friend is a 10, yes.

Trevor Noah 48:15 Your friend was cooking.

Joe Opio 48:16 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:17 Your friend was singing.

Joe Opio 48:18 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:18 Your friend was juggling. Man, your friend was putting on a show.

Joe Opio 48:21 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:21 And outside the window, your date sees your friend.

Joe Opio 48:24 Yes. I was also putting on a semi-show.

Trevor Noah 48:27 Fine.

Joe Opio 48:28 Yes.

Trevor Noah 48:28 But as we know, semis are not exactly the best.

Joe Opio 48:31 They don't count, okay?

Trevor Noah 48:33 And then your date saw your friend and went, "You know what? I would like to date that guy. Would that guy like to date me?" And then your friend goes, "You know what? I'm back in the mix." That's exact- That's more what happened.

Joe Opio 48:48 Yes, but I'm saying it feels unfair.

Trevor Noah 48:49 So, so, so, I mean, all is fair.

Joe Opio 48:52 So I guess the, I, I guess the moral of the lesson is if I ever take a girl out on a date, I don't want Trevor breakdancing outside the window.

Trevor Noah 48:58 Hey, my friend, choose your restaurants wisely.

Joe Opio 49:01 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 49:01 I, I just don't think there's, there's drama.

Joe Opio 49:02 No, no, but for me-

Trevor Noah 49:02 You know what? I'll tell you what's-

Joe Opio 49:03 For me, it's funny

Trevor Noah 49:03 ... I'll tell you what's more dramatic.

Joe Opio 49:04 Yes.

Trevor Noah 49:05 I'll tell you what's more exciting. This is the final World Cup where we get to see... It's, it's the changing of a guard in one of the biggest ways possible.

Joe Opio 49:15 I think before you move-

Trevor Noah 49:15 This is the fi-

Joe Opio 49:15 I think before you move on to that, the fact that Germany is having mini drama, for me, tells me a lot about this World Cup. And I think I told you this, I think this World Cup has so much drama, it should be airing on Bravo.

Trevor Noah 49:26 [laughs]

Joe Opio 49:26 Because Germans normally are very, like, matter of fact. Teams are chosen-

Trevor Noah 49:30 You, you think it's this, it's, it's that dramatic?

Joe Opio 49:32 This, this is huge. It's, like, causing waves in Germany, 'cause they th- they, they think it's very unfair to the keeper who led them. They s- they said Neuer, Neuer is amazing. Everyone wants him on the team.

Trevor Noah 49:40 I mean, now you, now you just-

Joe Opio 49:41 But-

Trevor Noah 49:41 You just sold me another brilliant idea. We should go to Bravo and sell them the, The Real Housewives of the World Cup.

Joe Opio 49:49 Of the World Cup, yes.

Trevor Noah 49:50 And it's just the players. And then now, 'cause now they'd be in the confessional-

Joe Opio 49:53 Well, it'd be, yes

Trevor Noah 49:53 ... and then the other goalkeeper-

Joe Opio 49:54 Yes

Trevor Noah 49:54 ... would be like, "So, you know, I don't even understand what happened here because, you know-

Joe Opio 49:58 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 49:58 ... the whole time I was playing for the national team, and I was the main player."

Joe Opio 50:03 10 games, yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 50:03 10 games, and I took the team to the World Cup. We qualified with these hands in these gloves.

Joe Opio 50:09 And now [laughs]

Trevor Noah 50:09 And so all of a sudden, that bitch Neuer-

Joe Opio 50:11 Yes

Trevor Noah 50:11 ... comes out of nowhere-

Joe Opio 50:12 Just swoops in, yes

Trevor Noah 50:12 ... and takes the spot. I mean, what are we doing here, guys? Ugh." And then they cut to Neuer, then Neuer's like, [laughs]

Joe Opio 50:19 I like, I like, I like the f- I like the fact that your dramatic German is still not dramatic at all.

Trevor Noah 50:23 Yeah, I mean, that-

Joe Opio 50:24 Like, no, like-

Trevor Noah 50:24 That was very dramatic German

Joe Opio 50:25 ... like, he's being, he's being sassy, but he's not like dramatic, dramatic Real Housewives.

Trevor Noah 50:28 Yeah, but this is like, this is, like, for a German, this is-

Joe Opio 50:31 It's like peak sass.

Trevor Noah 50:32 What-

Joe Opio 50:32 Peak. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 50:33 Germans who watch what I just did now are gonna be like, "Damn, that was in- that was intense."

Joe Opio 50:38 That's ... Oh, they, they'll be like, "That German needs to-

Trevor Noah 50:40 Yeah, that-

Joe Opio 50:40 ... control their emotions."

Trevor Noah 50:41 You know what I mean? Like, the scale for Germans. Um, no, the thing I'm most excited for is the changing of an era, my friend. Last World Cup where we get to see Messi, Ronaldo, and Neymar.

Joe Opio 50:52 Yeah, their last dance.

Trevor Noah 50:53 These were-

Joe Opio 50:53 And Neuer.

Trevor Noah 50:56 As I said-

Joe Opio 50:56 Yeah

Trevor Noah 50:56 ... last World Cup where we get to see Messi, [laughs] Ronaldo-

Joe Opio 51:00 Just, yes

Trevor Noah 51:00 ... and Neymar. This guy just threw in-

Joe Opio 51:02 In a goalkeeper

Trevor Noah 51:02 ... [laughs] a goalkeeper.

Joe Opio 51:04 Yes.

Trevor Noah 51:04 Who,

Trevor Noah 51:05 yes, he is one of the greatest goalkeepers of all time.

Joe Opio 51:07 Top three, yes.

Trevor Noah 51:08 But-

Joe Opio 51:08 But he's not, yes

Trevor Noah 51:09 ... come on.

Joe Opio 51:09 Mm.

Trevor Noah 51:10 Come on, mm.

Joe Opio 51:11 He shouldn't be in the same, yeah-

Trevor Noah 51:12 Come on

Joe Opio 51:12 ... in the same, yeah. He shouldn't be-

Trevor Noah 51:13 We're talking about players who-

Joe Opio 51:15 Who made you sit at, on the edge of your seat, yes

Trevor Noah 51:17 ... who made you want to play like them.

Joe Opio 51:19 Mm. Mm.

Trevor Noah 51:20 Neymar, arguably the greatest talent that, again, didn't achieve the heights that he was supposed to, a- arguably because he didn't, like, want to.

Joe Opio 51:32 Mm.

Trevor Noah 51:32 Neymar never seemed to enjoy the pressure nor the lifestyle.

Joe Opio 51:36 He was Brazilian.

Trevor Noah 51:37 But ... No, but other Brazilians, they reached their peak.

Joe Opio 51:40 Nah. No, Brazilians-

Trevor Noah 51:41 Ronaldinho did it.

Joe Opio 51:41 No, he didn't.

Trevor Noah 51:42 What do you mean Ronald-

Joe Opio 51:43 Brazil ... Ew. Ronaldinho could have had. He could-

Trevor Noah 51:44 Does Ronaldinho have a Ballon d'Or?

Joe Opio 51:46 Yeah, but he could have, he could, he should have five.

Trevor Noah 51:48 Yeah, but he could, but he should have had two, if we're honest.

Joe Opio 51:50 Yes, at least two, yes.

Trevor Noah 51:51 He should have had two.

Joe Opio 51:51 But, but I w-

Trevor Noah 51:52 You know what? I think he was a little bit robbed of one.

Joe Opio 51:54 One-

Trevor Noah 51:54 He should have had two.

Joe Opio 51:54 Yes.

Trevor Noah 51:55 He did his Champions League. He did his leagues. He did his World Cups. He did amazing things. No, no, no, you want-

Joe Opio 52:01 Brazilians always shine brightly-

Trevor Noah 52:03 Yeah, but you-

Joe Opio 52:03 ... but for such a short period of time because-

Trevor Noah 52:04 Yeah, but you want Brazilians to not be Brazilian. That's your problem.

Joe Opio 52:06 Yes. No, that's, that's why I said Neymar is Brazilian.

Trevor Noah 52:08 No.

Joe Opio 52:09 He did the Brazilian thing.

Trevor Noah 52:10 Brazilian ... Neymar underperformed for a Brazilian even. How many World Cups does Neymar have?

Joe Opio 52:15 None.

Trevor Noah 52:16 Okay.

Joe Opio 52:17 Yeah, but he was-

Trevor Noah 52:17 How many Champions League?

Joe Opio 52:17 Yeah, but he was also-

Trevor Noah 52:18 Wait

Joe Opio 52:18 ... he was, he was also cursed with the worst team-

Trevor Noah 52:20 Wait

Joe Opio 52:20 ... in Brazilian history.

Trevor Noah 52:20 Joe?

Joe Opio 52:21 Mm.

Trevor Noah 52:22 Answer my questions.

Joe Opio 52:24 Okay.

Trevor Noah 52:24 How many World Cups does Neymar have?

Joe Opio 52:25 He has none.

Trevor Noah 52:26 How many Champions Leagues does he have?

Joe Opio 52:27 He has one.

Trevor Noah 52:28 How many leagues does he have?

Joe Opio 52:29 He has, like, three, four.

Trevor Noah 52:32 In a career of how long?

Joe Opio 52:34 A career that's been cut short because of injuries, because of off the pitch-

Trevor Noah 52:36 How many Ballon d'Ors does he have?

Joe Opio 52:38 None.

Trevor Noah 52:38 Okay.

Joe Opio 52:39 Yes.

Trevor Noah 52:40 When you look-

Joe Opio 52:41 It's, it's a travesty

Trevor Noah 52:42 ... when you look at what-

Joe Opio 52:42 Yes

Trevor Noah 52:42 ... Neymar is capable of-

Joe Opio 52:44 Yes

Trevor Noah 52:44 ... there is no person in this world who can dispute-

Joe Opio 52:48 I c-

Trevor Noah 52:48 Even Messi has said-

Joe Opio 52:50 I can't ... Yes

Trevor Noah 52:50 ... let's, let's use your Lord and Savior Messi.

Joe Opio 52:53 Okay.

Trevor Noah 52:54 Even Messi has said-

Joe Opio 52:55 Okay

Trevor Noah 52:56 ... when they've asked Messi, "Who are some of your favorite player?" He says, "When I watch Neymar play the game, I'm mesmerized."

Joe Opio 53:05 Brilliant, beautiful. Joga bonito, as you say.

Trevor Noah 53:06 Messi says that.

Joe Opio 53:07 Yes.

Trevor Noah 53:09 Neymar. So I'm excited that we get to see ... It's like one last chance for Neymar to come out and just, like, just even if it's, like, for two games-

Joe Opio 53:18 Yes, yes. The flashes

Trevor Noah 53:19 ... just to, just remind everybody why-

Joe Opio 53:22 Yes

Trevor Noah 53:22 ... he was supposed to be that thing. In fact, I would even hope that Neymar wins a World Cup just because, man, it would be amazing.

Joe Opio 53:29 It will be, it will be, yeah, it will be good for him to win. But the thing is-

Trevor Noah 53:31 It would be great for Brazil

Joe Opio 53:32 ... but, but as I, as I'm saying again-

Trevor Noah 53:34 It would be great for Neymar

Joe Opio 53:34 ... his cast, his generation. 'Cause Ronaldinho, for all his talents, he still played alongside Ronaldo-

Trevor Noah 53:41 Esh, Ronaldo

Joe Opio 53:41 ... Rivaldo.

Trevor Noah 53:42 Esh.

Joe Opio 53:42 He played against ... Neymar has been carrying this team on his back.

Trevor Noah 53:47 That's true.

Joe Opio 53:47 And when you look at p-

Trevor Noah 53:48 That's true

Joe Opio 53:48 ... players like Raphinha and players like Vinicius, they're great at their clubs-

Trevor Noah 53:51 Yeah, but they're not-

Joe Opio 53:52 ... still don't perform when they put on the golden shirt.

Trevor Noah 53:54 Yeah.

Joe Opio 53:54 So I don't hold the Ballon d' against him because he was competing in the same, same era as Ronaldo and Messi. It was a bit tough for him to break through. Uh, but I also think-

Trevor Noah 54:05 Yeah, but I don't think he played to-

Joe Opio 54:06 I, I think his-

Trevor Noah 54:07 ... perform at this level

Joe Opio 54:07 ... I think he didn't have the discipline.

Trevor Noah 54:09 Yeah, but-

Joe Opio 54:10 Def-

Trevor Noah 54:10 And I ... He talks about it. You see him, he likes playing video games.

Joe Opio 54:12 Yes.

Trevor Noah 54:13 He likes living a different kind of life.

Joe Opio 54:14 Yes.

Trevor Noah 54:14 And I think his dad puts too much pressure on him, but that's just from what I've seen. I mean, that's, you know. Um-

Joe Opio 54:19 His dad is like any sports dad. He's like-

Trevor Noah 54:22 Yeah, but he's o-

Joe Opio 54:22 ... Michael Jackson's dad. He's like any sports ... He's like, you know, Serena Williams' dad. He's like any, any sports dad who is invested in their kids becoming the next big thing, will always put them under-

Trevor Noah 54:31 Immense amounts of pressure

Joe Opio 54:32 ... yeah, immense amounts of pressure.

Trevor Noah 54:33 Yeah, that's true.

Joe Opio 54:33 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 54:34 Messi is just Messi.

Joe Opio 54:35 Yes.

Trevor Noah 54:35 He, he can do anything.

Joe Opio 54:37 Because-

Trevor Noah 54:37 What do you think of the, what do you think of the Argentina squad for this one?

Joe Opio 54:39 I think it's better than the squad in 2022.

Trevor Noah 54:41 I agree.

Joe Opio 54:42 I think it's more balanced. I think the fact that Messi's four years older might count against them, but he's Messi.

Trevor Noah 54:49 Ah, but he's Messi, man.

Joe Opio 54:49 All he needs is a moment of brilliance.

Trevor Noah 54:51 He's Messi.

Joe Opio 54:52 I think Ronaldo, Port- the Portugal team, funny enough, the most stable team.

Trevor Noah 54:56 It's a good team.

Joe Opio 54:57 No drama.

Trevor Noah 54:58 It's a good team.

Joe Opio 54:59 No selection drama.

Trevor Noah 55:00 Yo-

Joe Opio 55:01 I think Ronaldo-

Trevor Noah 55:02 ... it's a good team

Joe Opio 55:02 ... I think Ronaldo might help, might hold them back.

Trevor Noah 55:04 It is a good

Trevor Noah 55:05 team.

Joe Opio 55:06 I think accommodating Ronaldo in that team might hold them back.

Trevor Noah 55:09 It will. It will.

Joe Opio 55:10 But then he's Ronaldo. Again, you can't, like, count him out. But-

Trevor Noah 55:13 You shouldn't count him out, but I, but I think-

Joe Opio 55:16 He'll do more harm than good

Trevor Noah 55:17 So, so here, here, so here's my opinion. Might be controversial if you're a Ronaldo fan, but I think the greatest thing Ronaldo can do is use-

Joe Opio 55:26 We're going get to get- we're going to get burnt at the stake.

Trevor Noah 55:28 That's fine.

Joe Opio 55:29 Yes.

Trevor Noah 55:29 The greatest thing Ronaldo can do at this World Cup-

Joe Opio 55:32 Is be a cheerleader

Trevor Noah 55:33 ... yes, is, is allow his team to do things without him. If you look at what, what Portugal did at the Euros without him, I'm not saying that he's not good, and I'm not saying he shouldn't be in the team. But I'm saying, like, if Ronaldo is able to lessen his gravitational pull, both in terms of being on the pitch-

Joe Opio 55:52 Yes

Trevor Noah 55:52 ... and in terms of, like, wanting the ball and, and... Man, that Portugal team, guys, we're talking about, like, you've got Vitinha-

Joe Opio 56:00 Vitinha, João Neves

Trevor Noah 56:01 ... João Neves.

Joe Opio 56:02 Yes.

Trevor Noah 56:02 You've got-

Joe Opio 56:02 Bruno Mendes

Trevor Noah 56:03 ... Bruno Mendes.

Joe Opio 56:03 Yeah.

Trevor Noah 56:03 You've got Bruno Fernandes-

Joe Opio 56:05 The whole team, yes

Trevor Noah 56:05 ... who just cannot-

Joe Opio 56:06 Bernardo Silva

Trevor Noah 56:06 ... kick a ball wrong.

Joe Opio 56:07 The whole team, yes.

Trevor Noah 56:07 Bernardo Silva. You've got, like, decent defenders at the back as well.

Joe Opio 56:11 Yes. It's frankly between them, France, and Spain.

Trevor Noah 56:14 The weakest player is probably-

Joe Opio 56:15 Yeah

Trevor Noah 56:15 ... the weakest player is probably the goalkeeper. So-

Joe Opio 56:17 Who saves penalties for fun.

Trevor Noah 56:19 True, but-

Joe Opio 56:19 Yes

Trevor Noah 56:20 ... beyond penalties, though, he's not the-

Joe Opio 56:21 The weakest player-

Trevor Noah 56:22 ... greatest goalkeeper

Joe Opio 56:22 ... the weakest player is by far Ronaldo. And again, we're go-

Trevor Noah 56:24 Did they bring-

Joe Opio 56:25 We're going to get canceled

Trevor Noah 56:25 ... did they bring Rafael Leão as well?

Joe Opio 56:26 Rafael Leão is in there.

Trevor Noah 56:27 Yeah, man.

Joe Opio 56:28 Big difference maker. I think for me, the thing is about Ronaldo, and that's what makes this team a Greek tragedy, is the thing you're saying is the exact thing Ronaldo can't do naturally.

Trevor Noah 56:39 That's why I'm saying Ronaldo-

Joe Opio 56:40 He can't step away-

Trevor Noah 56:41 Cristiano Ronaldo-

Joe Opio 56:42 ... for the benefit of the team

Trevor Noah 56:43 ... if you are out there, this could be the moment where you shock the world.

Joe Opio 56:47 No, he can't. It-

Trevor Noah 56:49 Joe-

Joe Opio 56:49 It goes against everything in his DNA.

Trevor Noah 56:51 Yes, but-

Joe Opio 56:51 Yeah

Trevor Noah 56:51 ... this is the mo- We love movies.

Joe Opio 56:55 Yes.

Trevor Noah 56:55 What do we love about great movies? The unexpected happens. If Cristiano Ronaldo, if Cristiano Ronaldo comes out with that team and at a moment where we don't expect it, takes a back seat, Portugal can win the World Cup.

Joe Opio 57:10 But what also makes great movies is the fact that normally the character or the protagonist or e-ve-even the antagonist, they have a character flaw that they can't quite overcome, and Ronaldo has that as a character flaw. He has to be the main character. He can't step away.

Trevor Noah 57:26 Man, but if he does it-

Joe Opio 57:27 Can't

Trevor Noah 57:27 ... at the right moment-

Joe Opio 57:28 He won't step away. I watched-

Trevor Noah 57:29 ... at the right moment

Joe Opio 57:30 ... I watched his team play in the Saudi league. He can't step away. He can't help himself.

Trevor Noah 57:34 Yeah, but that's the Saudi league.

Joe Opio 57:35 Yes.

Trevor Noah 57:35 You can't tell Ronaldo to step away at the Saudi league.

Joe Opio 57:37 [laughs] He was costing them more than he was helping them.

Trevor Noah 57:39 Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Joe Opio 57:39 That's what I'm saying. So-

Trevor Noah 57:40 That's what, that's what I worry about though

Joe Opio 57:41 ... so for me, that's the funny thing. They have to accommodate him.

Trevor Noah 57:44 That's what I worry about.

Joe Opio 57:44 And, and as, and as I've said, Ronaldo can put the chances away. But then when he's not putting the chances away, he can't press, he can't hold up play, so you're basically playing with 10.

Trevor Noah 57:55 It's going to be interesting. I mean, not as interesting as-

Joe Opio 57:57 And also-

Trevor Noah 57:58 ... as Iran playing in the World Cup. A lot of people have been shocked by this 'cause they, I guess they don't understand how, special is the wrong word. Come on, you're, you're a, you're a d- dictionary. What's, what's a better word to describe Iran, or rather like how the World Cup creates-

Joe Opio 58:18 This bubble of-

Trevor Noah 58:19 It's a world-

Joe Opio 58:20 Yes.

Trevor Noah 58:20 Oh, I didn't know you were gonna use bubble. I also have bubble in my vocabulary.

Joe Opio 58:23 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 58:23 I thought you were gonna give us something magical. But I-

Joe Opio 58:26 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 58:26 ... bubble I could have said as well.

Joe Opio 58:27 No, I also want, I, I, I want to show that I have the common touch, you know. I

Joe Opio 58:30 speak-

Trevor Noah 58:30 Okay, fine

Joe Opio 58:30 ... the language of the common man.

Trevor Noah 58:31 All right, bubble.

Joe Opio 58:31 Yes.

Trevor Noah 58:31 We'll go with bubble then.

Joe Opio 58:32 Yes.

Trevor Noah 58:32 Damn.

Joe Opio 58:33 Hm?

Trevor Noah 58:33 I'm glad I, I, I, I [laughs] am glad I deferred to you, Joe. No, the World Cup, I was, I was trying to explain, um, to my American friends, uh-

Joe Opio 58:43 Oh, you have some as well. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 58:45 [laughs] I didn't want to mention it, but I was trying to explain to my American friends why Iran is playing in the World Cup. They were like, "But America-

Joe Opio 58:54 We at war, yes

Trevor Noah 58:54 ... is at war with Iran. How can you, how can..." Then I was like, "Guys, the World Cup is something that goes beyond your petty grievances-

Joe Opio 59:05 Yes, yes, yes, yes

Trevor Noah 59:06 ... and these ideas-

Joe Opio 59:07 Plus they hate us. Yes

Trevor Noah 59:07 ... you have of world leaders-

Joe Opio 59:09 Mm

Trevor Noah 59:10 ... and political affiliations. And yo, everything stops.

Joe Opio 59:15 Stops, yes.

Trevor Noah 59:18 During the World Cup in South Africa in 2010, do you know how much crime we had? None.

Joe Opio 59:24 Plummeted, yes.

Trevor Noah 59:26 None, Joe. It was just shh. When FIFA comes to your country-

Joe Opio 59:32 FIFA takes over the country

Trevor Noah 59:33 ... it is like being invaded-

Joe Opio 59:35 Yes, yes

Trevor Noah 59:36 ... by a very polite-

Joe Opio 59:38 Benevolent, yes

Trevor Noah 59:38 ... invading force. It's a benevolent-

Joe Opio 59:40 Occupying force

Trevor Noah 59:41 ... yes.

Joe Opio 59:41 Mm.

Trevor Noah 59:42 They come in, they bring festivity and joy, and immense fi- financial pressure, if we're honest, to your country.

Joe Opio 59:49 What people forget, FIFA actually enacts its own laws.

Trevor Noah 59:52 Yes, they don't

Joe Opio 59:52 They come-

Trevor Noah 59:52 ... know that

Joe Opio 59:53 ... and take over the legal system.

Trevor Noah 59:54 Yes.

Joe Opio 59:54 Because when someone violates any copyright, they want to try them immediately, prosecute them.

Trevor Noah 59:59 It's FIFA who does it.

Joe Opio 59:59 Yes. Your, your, your, your legal system.

Trevor Noah 1:00:03 It just pauses.

Joe Opio 1:00:05 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:00:05 So Iran playing in the World Cup is not as crazy as people think because Iran made it into the World Cup, but I do want to see what it'll be like when Iran is on the pitch.

Joe Opio 1:00:16 It'll be interesting because there's a huge Iranian diaspora in America.

Trevor Noah 1:00:21 Yeah, but like-

Joe Opio 1:00:22 So-

Trevor Noah 1:00:23 I, I'm with you there

Joe Opio 1:00:23 ... yes.

Trevor Noah 1:00:24 I'm with you there, but you know what-

Joe Opio 1:00:25 They wouldn't be wanting for fans. Like, they'll have enough fans. Like, people will show up.

Trevor Noah 1:00:30 That's true.

Joe Opio 1:00:30 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:00:31 Yeah, that's true actually.

Joe Opio 1:00:31 Uh, but it's gonna be very interesting because they were initially based in America, and then the Iranian, the, the, the, the, their delegation demanded that they be moved out of America. So they're gonna be flying into America, playing the games, and then going back to, to Mexico.

Trevor Noah 1:00:46 Why would they do that?

Joe Opio 1:00:46 They moved their base to Mexico.

Trevor Noah 1:00:47 Why would they do that though?

Joe Opio 1:00:48 They didn't want to be in America.

Trevor Noah 1:00:51 Man, now you're hurting, now you're cutting off your nose to spite. That's, that's-

Joe Opio 1:00:53 No, they, they were like, "We'd rather train in Mexico," because they're playing all their games in America.

Trevor Noah 1:00:58 Yeah, but that's, uh, you see, you've hurt your- that to me, like, you've now your team is tired. They, you know, you, you don't want to, you don't want to do that. I mean, we'll-

Joe Opio 1:01:05 Yeah

Trevor Noah 1:01:05 ... we'll see what. I, I, I predict-

Joe Opio 1:01:06 No, but no-

Trevor Noah 1:01:07 I predict that, that won't go well.

Joe Opio 1:01:08 No, no, but you're right. I remember in South Africa again, I was, I was explaining to my South African friends, uh, during 2010. I have-

Trevor Noah 1:01:15 Is that me?

Joe Opio 1:01:15 Yes. No, I have some. Uh, I have some besides you.

Trevor Noah 1:01:17 When were you explaining to me?

Joe Opio 1:01:20 You mean South Africa when North Korea played in South, in South... And people were like, "Oh, North, we didn't know North Korea is even allowed to play-

Trevor Noah 1:01:25 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Joe Opio 1:01:25 ... in the World Cup."

Trevor Noah 1:01:26 Yeah.

Joe Opio 1:01:26 But that's the thing, that's the special thing about the World Cup. Eng- England played Argentina in '86.

Trevor Noah 1:01:31 Yeah.

Joe Opio 1:01:32 Just, I think two, three years after they had fought over the Falklands. That's the special thing about the World Cup. Once the World Cup starts, forget your wars, forget your... It's the game. And so that's-

Trevor Noah 1:01:44 They should include a new rule. If two countries-

Joe Opio 1:01:47 Are fighting

Trevor Noah 1:01:48 ... are fighting and play against each other in the World Cup, whoever wins that game wins the dispute.

Joe Opio 1:01:53 You know, that's funny because in 1998 Iran played, 'cause Iran and the US have been mortal enemies forever.

Trevor Noah 1:02:00 Right.

Joe Opio 1:02:00 They played in '98. Iran won 2-1. They played in Qatar, which was supposed to be like the revenge game, and it turned out to be because the US won 2-1. So-

Trevor Noah 1:02:10 So now this is the final-

Joe Opio 1:02:10 ... fingers crossed. Yeah, fingers crossed, yeah. They, they meet in the knockouts, and then whoever wins, that should be the rule. Whoever wins will open up the Strait of Hormuz. Whoever wins close it.

Trevor Noah 1:02:23 Oh, who closes the Strait of Hormuz.

Joe Opio 1:02:24 Yes, yes. It should be the trophy.

Trevor Noah 1:02:25 Yeah. Now this is-

Joe Opio 1:02:25 Yeah

Trevor Noah 1:02:25 ... this is sports betting now.

Joe Opio 1:02:27 Yeah, that's, that's high stakes now. Yeah.

Trevor Noah 1:02:27 This is ultimate sports betting now.

Joe Opio 1:02:30 That should be it. Yeah.

Trevor Noah 1:02:30 Bet, put your money where your mouth is. Who do you think would win, Iran or USA? 'Cause Team USA, if we're honest, is not looking that great.

Joe Opio 1:02:38 I think Iran-

Trevor Noah 1:02:38 Like, the, the tools that they have

Joe Opio 1:02:39 ... I, I think Iran would win simply because of the stakes. Like, when, I feel like the US when they are playing, especially when... The few times I've seen them play against Iran, and, and it's just two times, it feels like the Iranians know that there's more at stake than just the result.

Trevor Noah 1:02:53 Oh, they're playing for their family.

Joe Opio 1:02:54 Yeah, they're playing for everything. They're playing for national pride, and also, like, they're a smaller country geopolitically, so this means everything to them. The Americans are playing, yeah, you know, but they're not playing the way, they don't play with the same passion they play against Mexico.

Trevor Noah 1:03:08 Oh.

Joe Opio 1:03:08 If you've watched America play-

Trevor Noah 1:03:09 Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Joe Opio 1:03:10 ... against Mexico, American fans, American players are really locked in. There are fights happening. When they play against Iran, they, it's not their rival.

Trevor Noah 1:03:17 They don't see them.

Joe Opio 1:03:17 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 1:03:18 That's the problem.

Joe Opio 1:03:18 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:03:18 They don't see them. Okay, so what are your predictions?

Joe Opio 1:03:21 Uh.

Trevor Noah 1:03:22 Who do you think is gonna win the World Cup?

Joe Opio 1:03:24 I think-

Trevor Noah 1:03:24 Let's, let, let's start with the easy ones. My prediction is France. I say France is gonna win the World Cup.

Joe Opio 1:03:29 I would love to say France,

Joe Opio 1:03:30 but I think history forces me not to, because no team has won-

Trevor Noah 1:03:33 What does that mean?

Joe Opio 1:03:34 Because no team has made three World Cup finals and won two out of them. So France made the final-

Trevor Noah 1:03:40 You're gonna, you're gonna let history co- block you.

Joe Opio 1:03:41 Yes, 'cause France, France, France made the final in 2018, won it.

Trevor Noah 1:03:44 My friend.

Joe Opio 1:03:44 Made the final-

Trevor Noah 1:03:45 My friend

Joe Opio 1:03:45 ... in the last World Cup.

Trevor Noah 1:03:46 History-

Joe Opio 1:03:46 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:03:47 ... has shown that no one has responded to you swiping right, but that doesn't stop you.

Joe Opio 1:03:51 We can change that right now. Where's my phone?

Trevor Noah 1:03:53 That doesn't stop you, Joe.

Joe Opio 1:03:54 We can change that right now.

Trevor Noah 1:03:55 That doesn't stop you, Joe.

Joe Opio 1:03:55 Because now you forget one thing, I'm on a podcast.

Trevor Noah 1:03:57 Exactly, Joe. Anything can happen now.

Joe Opio 1:03:59 And ladies love guys on a podcast. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:04:00 Anything can hap- Women love guys on podcasts. Women are always like, "Oh, more of this, please."

Joe Opio 1:04:04 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:04:04 "Oh, please."

Joe Opio 1:04:05 Give more guys mics.

Trevor Noah 1:04:05 "More guys. Just talk."

Joe Opio 1:04:06 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:04:06 "Oh please, we need more of this." Women are like, "Oh."

Joe Opio 1:04:09 Okay.

Trevor Noah 1:04:09 "Oh wow, you have a microphone and you're espousing opinions-

Joe Opio 1:04:12 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:04:12 ... that are not based in fact nor in expertise. Please, more of this."

Joe Opio 1:04:15 Give me more times. Yes. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:04:16 "Give me more." Oh, you're gonna have a great time, Joe. So forget history.

Joe Opio 1:04:20 Okay.

Trevor Noah 1:04:20 What are you saying?

Joe Opio 1:04:21 I think Spain is going to win it.

Trevor Noah 1:04:22 You think, you think Spain will win the World-

Joe Opio 1:04:24 Yes. I think, I think Spain is-

Trevor Noah 1:04:25 Let's, let's-

Joe Opio 1:04:25 ... too balanced

Trevor Noah 1:04:26 ... can we, can, can you do me a favor?

Joe Opio 1:04:27 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:04:27 Remove the word think.

Joe Opio 1:04:29 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:04:29 This is not about thinking.

Joe Opio 1:04:30 I firmly believe Spain is going to win.

Trevor Noah 1:04:31 Thank you very much.

Joe Opio 1:04:32 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:04:32 Okay, so Spain's winning the World Cup.

Joe Opio 1:04:33 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 1:04:34 I say France is winning the World Cup. All right, now who do we think as a backup, a dark horse winner of the World Cup?

Joe Opio 1:04:41 Discounting Argentina because of Messi, I think Norway.

Trevor Noah 1:04:44 No, you can't discount Argentina. You have to choose one.

Joe Opio 1:04:47 No, because, no because a team with Messi can't be a dark horse.

Trevor Noah 1:04:49 No, they are a dark horse.

Joe Opio 1:04:50 No, a dark horse is one you don't expect to win.

Trevor Noah 1:04:52 So you expect them to win?

Joe Opio 1:04:53 I expect Messi to reach-

Trevor Noah 1:04:54 Okay, so Norway

Joe Opio 1:04:55 ... yeah, to go far. Yes. Norway because they have, they went through their qualifiers almost unbeaten, uh, they have-

Trevor Noah 1:05:02 Erling Haaland

Joe Opio 1:05:03 ... Erling Haaland. They have Sorloth.

Trevor Noah 1:05:04 Yeah.

Joe Opio 1:05:05 They have, like, a very good, they have, uh-

Trevor Noah 1:05:06 They have a solid team.

Joe Opio 1:05:07 Yeah, they have a solid team. I th-

Trevor Noah 1:05:08 Oscar Bob is, isn't he?

Joe Opio 1:05:09 Yeah. Um, Ødegaard.

Trevor Noah 1:05:11 Yeah.

Joe Opio 1:05:12 They have, like, a very-

Trevor Noah 1:05:12 It's a solid team.

Joe Opio 1:05:13 Yeah, they have a very, very good team. Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:05:14 If you can get the ball from the back-

Joe Opio 1:05:15 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:05:15 ... to the middle to the front-

Joe Opio 1:05:16 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:05:16 ... you can win any game.

Joe Opio 1:05:17 They have a very, very good team, so I think they're the team that might surprise, surprise us the most. If you're talking about dark horses-

Trevor Noah 1:05:23 Yeah

Joe Opio 1:05:23 ... that's a team that might go farther than we expect.

Trevor Noah 1:05:25 Which African team do you think has the best chance?

Joe Opio 1:05:28 [sighs] Wow. [sighs] I, I, I would love to be hopeful and say maybe Ghana, but I watched their friend against Mexico. They were not... I, I, I, look, I-

Trevor Noah 1:05:46 Senegal?

Joe Opio 1:05:47 Senegal is always in there, but I don't think they have-

Trevor Noah 1:05:50 Discipline?

Joe Opio 1:05:51 No, no. I think, I think Mane is a bit older. I think they played well in the Africa Nations Cup, which they won under, you know, the circumstances-

Trevor Noah 1:05:58 Egypt

Joe Opio 1:05:58 ... they won in. I feel like the North African teams never go far in the World Cup. They always-

Trevor Noah 1:06:05 Um, um, Morocco had the darling run.

Joe Opio 1:06:08 Yeah, okay. Yeah. I th- I, I, I think I would look at Morocco. I would look at M- but Morocco surprised us in Qatar because they were the surprise. I think teams are going to be-

Trevor Noah 1:06:16 Ready for them now

Joe Opio 1:06:17 ... prepared for them. Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:06:17 Yeah. Okay.

Joe Opio 1:06:18 So I would go, and then the other team, like DR Congo, I think they would just, I think they'll be, I think, I'm not thinking, I'm not thinking they're making up the numbers, but I'm thinking they will just hope that they have a better outing than they did-

Trevor Noah 1:06:31 Right. Yeah

Joe Opio 1:06:31 ... the last World Cup they went in, which was 1974. And they lost so badly that their president almost threatened to not allow them back into the country. So I hope anything better than that, anything better than your c- president going like, "Oh, you're gonna become persona non grata," will be a win for DR Congo.

Trevor Noah 1:06:49 Oh, man. [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:06:53 [laughs] As someone said, they left not with their heads held high, but at least they still had their heads.

Trevor Noah 1:06:59 Oh, man.

Joe Opio 1:06:59 So anything better than that I think will be... I, I think Morocco. I think Morocco and Senegal. They're the two teams that also made it to the final of the Nations Cup.

Trevor Noah 1:07:06 Yeah, so they have the-

Joe Opio 1:07:06 So if you're going by the form book-

Trevor Noah 1:07:07 ... they have the best chance of the-

Joe Opio 1:07:08 ... yeah, they have the best chance

Trevor Noah 1:07:08 ... the best chance of the not-best-chance havers.

Joe Opio 1:07:10 But I think Morocco really surprised us because they were a surprise. Now teams are gonna be ready for them.

Trevor Noah 1:07:15 I'm excited, bro.

Joe Opio 1:07:15 Mm.

Trevor Noah 1:07:15 This is gonna be a big one.

Joe Opio 1:07:17 Yes, so-

Trevor Noah 1:07:17 We're gonna be doing the, we're gonna be doing the watch party.

Joe Opio 1:07:18 Yes.

Trevor Noah 1:07:18 That's gonna be dope.

Joe Opio 1:07:19 But also remember, there are also so many small teams. That's the thing I also love about this World Cup. There's so many small, small teams. Cape Verde, Curaçao, Uzbekistan

Trevor Noah 1:07:29 Are you just making up names now?

Joe Opio 1:07:30 No, no, these are teams [laughs] these are teams that are going to be playing. And I think, I, I-

Trevor Noah 1:07:33 I feel like now you're just like-

Joe Opio 1:07:34 I think-

Trevor Noah 1:07:34 ... making up words

Joe Opio 1:07:35 ... I think it sounds [laughs] it-

Trevor Noah 1:07:37 First of all, it's Cape Town, okay?

Joe Opio 1:07:39 Cape Town. [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:07:39 I don't know why this guy, you're just, like, making up things.

Joe Opio 1:07:42 There are white people watching going like, "Is he casting spells?"

Trevor Noah 1:07:44 Corazon, Corazon-

Joe Opio 1:07:45 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:07:45 ... is an, is a Spanish word.

Joe Opio 1:07:46 Corazao. I don't, yeah. But I think, I think it's gonna-

Trevor Noah 1:07:48 No, I'm joking, man.

Joe Opio 1:07:48 Look, it-

Trevor Noah 1:07:49 It is-

Joe Opio 1:07:49 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:07:49 ... it's great, it's great for them, but-

Joe Opio 1:07:51 That's, that's the great thing about expanding the World Cup. It gives every country a chance. Uzbekistan, who knew, are gonna be at the World Cup. I think it also gives Americans a chance to learn geography without invading countries.

Trevor Noah 1:08:02 [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:08:02 'Cause normally, [laughs] normally the only way Americans learn about countries is-

Trevor Noah 1:08:08 You know what I-

Joe Opio 1:08:08 ... they bring, they bring democracy-

Trevor Noah 1:08:09 You know why I'm laughing?

Joe Opio 1:08:09 Hmm?

Trevor Noah 1:08:09 I'm laughing because you think Americans are gonna be watching the World Cup. [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:08:14 [laughs] At home.

Trevor Noah 1:08:15 You think Americans are gonna watch-

Joe Opio 1:08:17 The, the-

Trevor Noah 1:08:17 ... the Corazao game?

Joe Opio 1:08:18 I, I think they're going to b- be watching the Corazao game if we do it as part of our World Cup watch party.

Trevor Noah 1:08:24 I mean, we'll, we'll see. It's gonna be fun, man.

Joe Opio 1:08:26 It's the perfect, it's the perfect way for Americans to watch the game.

Trevor Noah 1:08:28 It's, it's, it's gonna be fun. As long as they score a lot of g- goals-

Joe Opio 1:08:31 Mm-hmm

Trevor Noah 1:08:31 ... and they make it exciting. Here's, here's what I, I pitch to FIFA. If you want as many Americans watching this as possible, you should engineer a few moments. So-

Joe Opio 1:08:42 So you should rig the games?

Trevor Noah 1:08:43 No.

Joe Opio 1:08:44 Okay.

Trevor Noah 1:08:44 Not the games.

Joe Opio 1:08:44 Okay.

Trevor Noah 1:08:44 Engineer a few moments. So, like, at the beg- like, have a fight break out between two teams-

Joe Opio 1:08:53 [laughs]

Trevor Noah 1:08:53 ... before a game, and then have it go viral.

Joe Opio 1:08:56 Oh, you mean the teams, not the fans?

Trevor Noah 1:08:58 Not the fans.

Joe Opio 1:08:58 Okay.

Trevor Noah 1:08:58 The teams. Have a few, like, moments, 'cause I think that's also something that, that, that hampers, um-

Joe Opio 1:09:04 Oh, you, yeah, oh, you mean-

Trevor Noah 1:09:05 ... hampers soccer

Joe Opio 1:09:06 ... yeah.

Trevor Noah 1:09:06 F- like, soccer.

Joe Opio 1:09:06 Yeah, yeah.

Trevor Noah 1:09:06 The thing that hampers soccer in America is there aren't enough personal storylines. You see, so in America they'll go, "It, it's LeBron James-

Joe Opio 1:09:15 Yes, yes

Trevor Noah 1:09:15 ... and the Lakers-

Joe Opio 1:09:15 And Steph Curry, yes

Trevor Noah 1:09:16 ... going up against, you know-

Joe Opio 1:09:17 Hmm

Trevor Noah 1:09:17 ... Shai Gilgeous-Alexander-

Joe Opio 1:09:19 Steph, yeah, whatever. Yeah, yeah

Trevor Noah 1:09:19 ... and the OKC."

Joe Opio 1:09:19 Hmm.

Trevor Noah 1:09:20 It's like they make it a personal story. They, they make it a thing that, that gets you vested. We just go like, "Ah, Corazao. Uzbekistan." That, that doesn't get Americans in.

Joe Opio 1:09:28 Yes, yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 1:09:28 Americans wanna know-

Joe Opio 1:09:29 You need dramatic stakes to be hyped, yes

Trevor Noah 1:09:30 ... they want the anti- they want Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader.

Joe Opio 1:09:33 Yes, yes.

Trevor Noah 1:09:33 So Americans gotta create that. They should also encourage the players to, like, make videos. Like Messi, Ronaldo, it'd be great if they made videos to each other. Like-

Joe Opio 1:09:41 Oh

Trevor Noah 1:09:41 ... "Let me tell you something, brother"

Joe Opio 1:09:43 ... okay, okay, okay, okay.

Trevor Noah 1:09:43 "I want you to understand."

Joe Opio 1:09:44 Okay, okay, yeah.

Trevor Noah 1:09:44 "This might be my last World Cup, but I'm coming for you, Messi. I'm coming for you, brother. And a lot of people say that you're gonna beat me, but you ain't got what it takes. Ah."

Joe Opio 1:09:54 So turn this into, into a bit of wrestling, WWE style.

Trevor Noah 1:09:56 Just a little bit.

Joe Opio 1:09:57 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 1:09:58 And I think you're gonna bring the American crowd in.

Joe Opio 1:10:00 I'm, I'm, I'm... Here's my [laughs] I-

Trevor Noah 1:10:03 And if they don't do it-

Joe Opio 1:10:04 Look-

Trevor Noah 1:10:04 ... I'll, I'm more than willing to do it for them.

Joe Opio 1:10:05 Look, I'm a huge-

Trevor Noah 1:10:05 We'll use AI

Joe Opio 1:10:06 ... I'm, I'm a huge, huge World Cup fan, but here's the thing about a World Cup held in the US, and I was just thinking about this when you, when you were talking about how we can court more, uh, American fans. You know, when the World Cup was held in Qatar-

Trevor Noah 1:10:18 Yeah

Joe Opio 1:10:18 ... there was a huge backlash to the-

Trevor Noah 1:10:19 Yes

Joe Opio 1:10:20 ... controversial, controversial project. And we went like, "Okay, next World Cup, the host should have a proud footballing history," 'cause Qatar had none.

Trevor Noah 1:10:28 Yeah.

Joe Opio 1:10:29 "They should have a great LGBTQ record," 'cause Qatar had none.

Trevor Noah 1:10:34 [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:10:34 "Uh, they should, uh, have no corruption, no stench of corruption," 'cause Qatar had a lot of that. We went like, "There should be, women's rights should be respected by the next host," 'cause Qatar clearly disrespect human rights. And then we're like, "You know what? They shouldn't have, like, an immigrant labor crisis."

Trevor Noah 1:10:51 [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:10:52 That's what, th- th- that's the checklist. Oh, and also we went like, "Okay, there should be no gun violence. There should be no, they shouldn't have a broken healthcare system. They shouldn't have systemic racism. And they should be, okay, the next host at least should not be a failed democracy." And what did FIFA do? FIFA chose the USA.

Trevor Noah 1:11:11 Mm. I hope you have a green card, eh?

Joe Opio 1:11:13 They had one job.

Trevor Noah 1:11:14 Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm.

Joe Opio 1:11:15 And they somehow managed to pick a team-

Trevor Noah 1:11:18 Fighting words

Joe Opio 1:11:19 ... with the worst record than Qatar

Trevor Noah 1:11:20 ... fighting words.

Joe Opio 1:11:21 But still-

Trevor Noah 1:11:21 I hope you, you don't have any international flights planned soon, buddy

Joe Opio 1:11:25 ... [laughs] but still super excited, because you know when the World Cup starts, then all that flies out of the window. The moment the kick-off happens-

Trevor Noah 1:11:30 Hey, man, that's, look, one of the biggest things about it-

Joe Opio 1:11:33 The soccer party begins. Mm-hmm

Trevor Noah 1:11:34 ... as soon as the FIFA World Cup kicks off, the world stops, comes together. And I don't even say this in, like, a cheesy way. There are few moments other than wars-

Joe Opio 1:11:47 That unite, yes

Trevor Noah 1:11:48 ... that bring as many people together in one spectacle. There's, there are few moments that connect as many human beings as a World Cup. There are no moments where Corazao's gonna be having a conversation with-

Joe Opio 1:11:59 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:12:00 ... New Zealand, having a conversation with Iran, having a conversation with South Africa-

Joe Opio 1:12:03 Yes

Trevor Noah 1:12:03 ... having a conversation with Brazil, having a conversation with the United States, having a conversation with Mexico, having a... There's no other event.

Joe Opio 1:12:10 There's, forget conversation, there's no other event where people from Uzbekistan are going to be trash-talking America.

Trevor Noah 1:12:16 Yeah, man.

Joe Opio 1:12:16 And that's the good thing about the World Cup. Like, you get a chance-

Trevor Noah 1:12:18 It's gonna be amazing

Joe Opio 1:12:18 ... to trash talk. And I think our World Cup watch party is going to give fans who are not as deep into the game a very good outlet, because it just won't be-

Trevor Noah 1:12:29 Well, I mean, if you're gonna be there-

Joe Opio 1:12:30 It, it just won't be like-

Trevor Noah 1:12:31 If you're gonna be there, even if people don't like football, if they're fans of dating apps, ha ha, they've come to the right place.

Joe Opio 1:12:37 That's wh-

Trevor Noah 1:12:37 I'll tell you that much

Joe Opio 1:12:37 ... maybe that's what we should call the, the World Cup to Americans. Maybe that's how, that's how, that's a perfect way to describe it. It's like Coachella meets Burning Man meets you swiping right on dating apps-

Trevor Noah 1:12:47 [laughs]

Joe Opio 1:12:47 ... and getting swiped right back. Not being left on read. That's, to me, how it feels. And I'm-

Trevor Noah 1:12:53 All right

Joe Opio 1:12:53 ... pretty excited for it.

Trevor Noah 1:12:54 You know what I'm gonna do now, Joe?

Joe Opio 1:12:55 I'm really, really excited.

Trevor Noah 1:12:56 I'm gonna swipe left on this episode and say that it's done. Uh, this was great, man.

Joe Opio 1:13:01 All right.

Trevor Noah 1:13:01 I'll see you, I'll see you next week, and we'll, um, we'll see where we go from here. It's gonna be exciting.

Joe Opio 1:13:06 It's on the app.

Trevor Noah 1:13:06 And, uh, for everyone else who's joining us, welcome to the World Cup.

Joe Opio 1:13:10 Ooh, it's going to be a rollercoaster ride of emotions.

Trevor Noah 1:13:12 Or as they say in South America, mundial.

Joe Opio 1:13:15 W- welcome to mundial.

Trevor Noah 1:13:16 Welcome. Bienvenido a mundial.

Joe Opio 1:13:19 Oof.

Trevor Noah 1:13:21 All right, dope.

Joe Opio 1:13:21 Mm-hmm.

Trevor Noah 1:13:24 Thank you so much for watching the episode. If you enjoyed it, pass it on to a friend. If you didn't enjoy it, pass it on to your friends still. Let them suffer for a change. And don't forget to engage with us in the comments. Uh, if you wanna, uh, suggest a guest, maybe there's questions you want, maybe there's ideas that you have, you can chat to us. We will read through the comments, and we'll get into it. Either way, I appreciate you taking the time. Thank you for hanging out with us on What Now? And remember, we do this for you, so we would like to hear from you. Till next time, thank you. [upbeat music]