What Now? With Trevor NoahWorld Cup Pregame Special: Breaking Down the 2026 World Cup
EVERY SPOKEN WORD
90 min read · 17,587 words- 0:00 – 2:02
Welcome to the World Cup Journey
- TNTrevor Noah
I was trying to think of how we can, how we can frame this.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
If you're listening or, or watching this, uh, you're about to em- you're about to embark on what I, what I like to think of as the most adversarial friendship you've ever experienced.
- JOJoe Opio
I think they call it frenemy-
- TNTrevor Noah
Frenemies
- JOJoe Opio
... in America. Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
No, uh, so are we frenemies in football?
- JOJoe Opio
Kind of. Uh, we-
- TNTrevor Noah
We're friends in life.
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah, bromance in life-
- TNTrevor Noah
Yes
- JOJoe Opio
... but when it comes to football-
- TNTrevor Noah
But football-
- JOJoe Opio
... yes, no, oh, no, no, we never see eye to eye. We never see eye to eye.
- TNTrevor Noah
I wonder if it'll change with the World Cup.
- JOJoe Opio
It should, 'cause the World Cup for me, oh man, I'm so excited. You know me. The World Cup is like the pinnacle. It's like-
- TNTrevor Noah
Oh man, the World Cup is-
- JOJoe Opio
How do I explain it? It's funny, 'cause Americans will get it. It's like, for me as a football fan, it's like, it's like going to prom, but also like an Avengers movie premiere-
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
... but also like the Super Bowl. It's like everything, man.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
I'm so excited. I'm, oh.
- TNTrevor Noah
Ah. I'm very excited, man. Thank you for joining me.
- JOJoe Opio
No, it's a pleasure.
- TNTrevor Noah
I should thank you for letting me join you-
- JOJoe Opio
Oh, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... on this football journey. Uh, thank you to everyone who's joining us. This is the first of many episodes where we're gonna be delving into the FIFA World Cup 2026. That's its full name.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
I like that some people wanna call it by its government name, the FIFA World Cup, 'cause we just say the World Cup.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, yes.
- 2:02 – 8:00
The Biggest World Cup Ever & The New Halftime Show
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs] Like they, they took it to McDonald's, or they took it to one of their GMO farms and just pump it-
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
... with those... You know, you've seen those like American chickens where you go like, wow.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
It's a super-sized-
- TNTrevor Noah
Oh, man
- JOJoe Opio
... American World Cup.
- TNTrevor Noah
Super-sized American World Cup.
- JOJoe Opio
48 teams.
- TNTrevor Noah
And it is, do you know what? Actually, it makes it the perfect American World Cup, because what is America without Canada and Mexico? If you think about it, if you think about honestly, I know a lot of people listening to this or watching this will be like, "Wait, wait, wait. What, what did you say?" F- first of all, for the world, Canada is America.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
I know that's not correct-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... but for the world, it is.
- JOJoe Opio
We don't have time to-
- TNTrevor Noah
And-
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
And what is America without Mexico? Think of all the food people are gonna be eating while watching the games. Most of it will be Mexican food.
- JOJoe Opio
Mexican food, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
You know what I mean? What, you take it out of, what is the Super Bowl without Mexican food? What is, like a, you know-
- JOJoe Opio
It's very interesting, 'cause the, the, especially the thing you said about Canada and America because Canadians are like, we're like, "No, we're not Americans," but where we come from, we have like, we're like, no, we don't have time to-
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, no
- JOJoe Opio
... dice you and splice you.
- TNTrevor Noah
No, no, no, no.
- JOJoe Opio
You're all Americans.
- TNTrevor Noah
No, my friend.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
It's the same way Africa's a continent for them.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- 8:00 – 13:40
Brazil's Emotional Squad Announcements & Neymar's Return
- JOJoe Opio
is like, "Okay, we're going to go mess up some Angorans."
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
But he's not, like, losing his mind. And then, like, we watched Neymar-
- TNTrevor Noah
Oh, yeah. Let me show you, let me show you this, this, this video
- JOJoe Opio
... crying and people laugh, and all running around. And then we're like, "Oh, this, this is a bit." Yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
This, this was, this was, like, one of my favorite videos. Here, hold on, hold on, hold on.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm-hmm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Let me see if I can get this thing going. This was-
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, this, this was the Neymar one. Look at this.
- JOJoe Opio
Look at the tension. Luiz Henrique Zanin. And they're calling them up in- Mateus Cunha- ... alphabetical order. Yes ... Manchester United. So now they know Neymar is coming up. Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
The woman, the woman next to Neymar-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... she's, like, feeling it. Look.
- JOJoe Opio
Neymar Jr Santos. [crowd cheering] So they thought that was over the top.
- TNTrevor Noah
Bro, you know what's wild is it's like he won the World Cup.
- JOJoe Opio
No, just making-
- TNTrevor Noah
Look at this. Look at this
- JOJoe Opio
... and this is Neymar. He's not, like, some scrub player. He's not like some... This is Neymar, probably the greatest talent Brazil has produced in the last 20 years, and that's how much it means to him. He's crying. He got emotional. And so when Americans watched that they went like, "He's just getting called up." And I tried to explain-
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah
- JOJoe Opio
... to them that it's like, you know, you know what I mean? But-
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, but wait. But the, the thing, the thing for me is, like...
- JOJoe Opio
He's hugging everyone, his family, his physio.
- TNTrevor Noah
The... No, no. You know, you know what it is for me is I like that people were filming their own potential pain. 'Cause this is, this is essentially like you-
- JOJoe Opio
He doesn't know. Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... No, but I'm saying it's...
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
First of all, I don't know why they have to do it like this. You could just put it out on the internet immediately. They make it like the Oscars-
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah
- TNTrevor Noah
... 'cause you have to sit there and then w- like wait for your name. He could also phone the players ahead of time and be like, "Yo, you're in the squad."
- 13:40 – 19:15
João Pedro's Snub and the Pain of Missing the World Cup
- TNTrevor Noah
team.
- JOJoe Opio
I was surprised as well.
- TNTrevor Noah
I know Chelsea hasn't-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... I know Chelsea hasn't done well, but-
- JOJoe Opio
He was their player of the season
- TNTrevor Noah
... I th- if you watch every single minute that João Pedro has been on a pitch this season, and in previous seasons-
- JOJoe Opio
He's been a difference maker, yeah
- TNTrevor Noah
... there are few players who make more of an impact, and also few players who are as dynamic and versatile as he is. João Pedro can hold up the game for, and if you look at his size and stature-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm. Mm-hmm
- TNTrevor Noah
... you don't think he can hold up the game the way he does, but he does. João Pedro can spur an attack on the wing. João Pedro can play like an, like an advanced forward position-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm
- TNTrevor Noah
... where he's just waiting for a through ball and he's gonna finish it. He can cut back. He can dribble. He can trap the ball. You, like, literally like it's got glue.
- JOJoe Opio
He's a complete package, yes. No, you're right.
- TNTrevor Noah
I was surprised that they left him behind.
- JOJoe Opio
The irony is-
- TNTrevor Noah
They took, they took Ryan.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
By the way, and can I just say, Ryan is, yo, shout out to Ryan. Ryan is one of my favorite, like, you, you know in our football group-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm-hmm
- TNTrevor Noah
... I talked about him long ago.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, yeah. He, he did come, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
I love Ryan from Bournemouth-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm
- TNTrevor Noah
... in the, in the English Premier League.
- JOJoe Opio
And he had a better season than-
- TNTrevor Noah
He's one of, he's one of my-
- JOJoe Opio
... they had a better season than Chelsea. But the thing is, the thing with João Pedro, the irony-
- TNTrevor Noah
He's, he's one of my, he's one of my favorite, favorite, favorite players.
- JOJoe Opio
I think the irony was João Pedro actually was interviewed short, I think, three or four weeks before the call-up, and he went to call, "I want Neymar to come." He was pro Neymar coming because he didn't think that Neymar coming-
- 19:15 – 21:50
Messi, Spain and the Players Fighting Back From Injury
- JOJoe Opio
I think, I think he has given so much football and-
- TNTrevor Noah
It's crazy that you don't even say, "I'm supporting Argentina"
- JOJoe Opio
No, I'm supporting Messi. I don't care about Argentina. I want Messi to do a repeat. But while my heart says Argentina, I think my brain says France or Spain.
- TNTrevor Noah
Hmm. My mind's telling me Messi.
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
But my body, my body wants France or Spain.
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
That song didn't do as well-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, 'cause-
- TNTrevor Noah
... on the charts. But now there's a gap.
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
There's a... I think you can get the, the remix rights to that song very cheap, Joe.
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
I know you've always been wanting to make it, and it's been, it's been very expensive for you to get the rights.
- JOJoe Opio
I, I-
- TNTrevor Noah
I think you can get them now. You can-
- JOJoe Opio
I, I, I think Spain is to start. And I think even the fact that Gavi...
- TNTrevor Noah
Why was Gavi so surprised, though? Didn't he-
- JOJoe Opio
No, because he just came off an injury.
- TNTrevor Noah
Oh, okay, okay, okay.
- JOJoe Opio
He was player. He was injured.
- TNTrevor Noah
Okay, got it
- JOJoe Opio
He was injured for a year and a half.
- TNTrevor Noah
No, good for him.
- JOJoe Opio
And again, again, it shows that this is not just a Brazilian phenomenon. It's like-
- TNTrevor Noah
Wait, wait, wait. Is, is, is-
- JOJoe Opio
Lamine Yamal
- TNTrevor Noah
... is Gavi the same as Gabi?
- JOJoe Opio
No.
- TNTrevor Noah
Is Gabi another player?
- 21:50 – 30:50
England's World Cup Debate Begins
- TNTrevor Noah
do as well as they should at World Cups over the past-
- JOJoe Opio
Or maybe they're the most hyped team, 'cause they-
- TNTrevor Noah
No, they're, they're... Look, no, no. Look, look. They're definitely hyped.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
But if we're honest, if we're honest, let's be fair to them. I know it's easy to hate on the English.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
And we should because of their history.
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah, they colonized us. Yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have, we have scars of colonization.
- JOJoe Opio
We, we, we, we, yeah, we-
- TNTrevor Noah
Yes
- JOJoe Opio
... we owe it to our ancestors.
- TNTrevor Noah
Of course, of course.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Of course. I mean, the language we're speaking right now is a gift from them. How can we not use it to slander them back?
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
Do you know what I mean? What a waste of language that would be.
- JOJoe Opio
They, they brought it on themselves.
- TNTrevor Noah
You... No, we ga- they gave it to us. Before, they wouldn't have heard these things we were saying.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Now they'd be like, "Why are you talking sh- about us? Why are you talking sh-?" 'Cause you gave it to us.
- JOJoe Opio
You gave us the power, yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
So you could hear. Before, it would just, it would just be sounds. So what I'm, I'm-
- JOJoe Opio
God, don't save the Queen. [laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs] But wow, this guy, shots fired. No, me, I'll always say, I'll always say it. Um, well, now it's God save the King, I guess.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
The, um... It's amazing how they just switched that up, eh? I always thought that was weird.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Like literally overnight, they're like-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- 30:50 – 46:45
Tuchel's Squad Selection and England's Chances
- TNTrevor Noah
from Manchester United, Harry Maguire Uh, Luke Shaw from Manchester United. Wait, wait, who else? Who has left out? Who's-
- JOJoe Opio
Trent Alexander-Arnold
- TNTrevor Noah
... Trent Alexander-Arnold from Real Madrid.
- JOJoe Opio
Can I just say, if as a nation you're lamenting Maguire not making the team, you're already not in a good starting place.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
Let me just say that. If as a nation you're bemoaning and making noise because Maguire isn't on the plane-
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
... you're already starting from a losing position. And I'll say, I'll say this, yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs] This guy. Yo, man.
- JOJoe Opio
I, I, I'll, I'll say this. The selection, very controversial.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah.
- JOJoe Opio
Actually, so many in the English press, especially the tabloids, think, uh, Thomas Tuchel is [laughs] a German double agent sent to sabotage England from-
- TNTrevor Noah
Is that what they're saying?
- JOJoe Opio
From inside. Yes, 'cause they're saying, "Oh, you left out the best players we have." I think the selection made sense.
- TNTrevor Noah
Okay, I, here's the thing I don't understand.
- JOJoe Opio
I think the selection made-
- TNTrevor Noah
Here, so here's a ... Let's go through this. Let's go through this ourselves, right?
- JOJoe Opio
Mm-hmm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Because, I mean, if we're honest-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm
- TNTrevor Noah
... we are probably the foremost experts in football in the world, right? We don't, we don't like to toot our own horn, but we are.
- JOJoe Opio
We love the beautiful game, yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
We are.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
So let's talk about the players who-
- JOJoe Opio
Who are left out
- TNTrevor Noah
... who are left out.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
And agree or disagree about why they should've been left out. So Phil Foden. I love Phil Foden. I think he's one of the most talented players in the world, but we cannot deny that Phil Foden has had a wishy-washy season.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- 46:45 – 51:05
World Cup Selection Drama Around the World
- JOJoe Opio
has had so much drama. You know, you have England, you have Spain, you have Germany. You know what's happening in Germany?
- TNTrevor Noah
Well, I mean, German drama-
- JOJoe Opio
With the goalkeeping situation, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... with Neuer.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
I don't get why that's a drama. I'll be honest.
- JOJoe Opio
He retired. Sat out the qualifiers.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah.
- JOJoe Opio
Another goalkeeper had to actually go through the qualifiers.
- TNTrevor Noah
So what?
- JOJoe Opio
Did a good game, did, did, did, did a good job, and now Neuer comes back, and he's going to play in the World Cup.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, but-
- JOJoe Opio
And then the keeper who helped them qualify-
- TNTrevor Noah
But Neuer, Neuer was fantastic with Bayern Munich.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, but I'm saying if I-
- TNTrevor Noah
The, the keeper, it, let me ask you this. The keeper who helped them qualify, is he in the squad?
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Then that's fine.
- JOJoe Opio
But he was supposed to be guaranteed-
- TNTrevor Noah
Joe
- JOJoe Opio
... a starting role.
- TNTrevor Noah
Joe, it's fine.
- JOJoe Opio
Trevor.
- TNTrevor Noah
Joe.
- JOJoe Opio
Think of it this way.
- TNTrevor Noah
Joe, Joe, Joe, if you bring another Tinder analogy here, my man-
- JOJoe Opio
If I swipe right-
- TNTrevor Noah
I'm gonna swipe, I'm gonna swipe left on you, eh
- JOJoe Opio
... if I swipe right on this girl, and then I take her on a date, and I treat her very, very well, and she says, "I had an amazing time," and then she goes like, "Your place or mine?" And I go like, "Oh, my place," and then we go back to my place, and then my friend who was discouraging me from actually swiping right on this girl goes like, "Now it's my time to shine," as you sit in the cock chair, it just feels unfair.
- TNTrevor Noah
So let's, let's-
- 51:05 – 55:05
The Last Dance of Messi, Ronaldo and Neymar
- TNTrevor Noah
yes, he is one of the greatest goalkeepers of all time.
- JOJoe Opio
Top three, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
But-
- JOJoe Opio
But he's not, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... come on.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Come on, mm.
- JOJoe Opio
He shouldn't be in the same, yeah-
- TNTrevor Noah
Come on
- JOJoe Opio
... in the same, yeah. He shouldn't be-
- TNTrevor Noah
We're talking about players who-
- JOJoe Opio
Who made you sit at, on the edge of your seat, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... who made you want to play like them.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm. Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Neymar, arguably the greatest talent that, again, didn't achieve the heights that he was supposed to, a- arguably because he didn't, like, want to.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Neymar never seemed to enjoy the pressure nor the lifestyle.
- JOJoe Opio
He was Brazilian.
- TNTrevor Noah
But ... No, but other Brazilians, they reached their peak.
- JOJoe Opio
Nah. No, Brazilians-
- TNTrevor Noah
Ronaldinho did it.
- JOJoe Opio
No, he didn't.
- TNTrevor Noah
What do you mean Ronald-
- JOJoe Opio
Brazil ... Ew. Ronaldinho could have had. He could-
- TNTrevor Noah
Does Ronaldinho have a Ballon d'Or?
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah, but he could have, he could, he should have five.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, but he could, but he should have had two, if we're honest.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, at least two, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
He should have had two.
- JOJoe Opio
But, but I w-
- 55:05 – 58:30
Can Portugal Win With Ronaldo?
- TNTrevor Noah
team.
- JOJoe Opio
I think accommodating Ronaldo in that team might hold them back.
- TNTrevor Noah
It will. It will.
- JOJoe Opio
But then he's Ronaldo. Again, you can't, like, count him out. But-
- TNTrevor Noah
You shouldn't count him out, but I, but I think-
- JOJoe Opio
He'll do more harm than good
- TNTrevor Noah
So, so here, here, so here's my opinion. Might be controversial if you're a Ronaldo fan, but I think the greatest thing Ronaldo can do is use-
- JOJoe Opio
We're going get to get- we're going to get burnt at the stake.
- TNTrevor Noah
That's fine.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
The greatest thing Ronaldo can do at this World Cup-
- JOJoe Opio
Is be a cheerleader
- TNTrevor Noah
... yes, is, is allow his team to do things without him. If you look at what, what Portugal did at the Euros without him, I'm not saying that he's not good, and I'm not saying he shouldn't be in the team. But I'm saying, like, if Ronaldo is able to lessen his gravitational pull, both in terms of being on the pitch-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... and in terms of, like, wanting the ball and, and... Man, that Portugal team, guys, we're talking about, like, you've got Vitinha-
- JOJoe Opio
Vitinha, João Neves
- TNTrevor Noah
... João Neves.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
You've got-
- JOJoe Opio
Bruno Mendes
- TNTrevor Noah
... Bruno Mendes.
- JOJoe Opio
Yeah.
- TNTrevor Noah
You've got Bruno Fernandes-
- JOJoe Opio
The whole team, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... who just cannot-
- JOJoe Opio
Bernardo Silva
- TNTrevor Noah
... kick a ball wrong.
- JOJoe Opio
The whole team, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Bernardo Silva. You've got, like, decent defenders at the back as well.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes. It's frankly between them, France, and Spain.
- 58:30 – 1:03:30
Iran, Politics and the Unique Power of the World Cup
- JOJoe Opio
speak-
- TNTrevor Noah
Okay, fine
- JOJoe Opio
... the language of the common man.
- TNTrevor Noah
All right, bubble.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
We'll go with bubble then.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
Damn.
- JOJoe Opio
Hm?
- TNTrevor Noah
I'm glad I, I, I, I [laughs] am glad I deferred to you, Joe. No, the World Cup, I was, I was trying to explain, um, to my American friends, uh-
- JOJoe Opio
Oh, you have some as well. [laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs] I didn't want to mention it, but I was trying to explain to my American friends why Iran is playing in the World Cup. They were like, "But America-
- JOJoe Opio
We at war, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... is at war with Iran. How can you, how can..." Then I was like, "Guys, the World Cup is something that goes beyond your petty grievances-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, yes, yes, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... and these ideas-
- JOJoe Opio
Plus they hate us. Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... you have of world leaders-
- JOJoe Opio
Mm
- TNTrevor Noah
... and political affiliations. And yo, everything stops.
- JOJoe Opio
Stops, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
During the World Cup in South Africa in 2010, do you know how much crime we had? None.
- JOJoe Opio
Plummeted, yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
None, Joe. It was just shh. When FIFA comes to your country-
- JOJoe Opio
FIFA takes over the country
- TNTrevor Noah
... it is like being invaded-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... by a very polite-
- JOJoe Opio
Benevolent, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... invading force. It's a benevolent-
- 1:03:30 – 1:07:15
World Cup Predictions, Dark Horses and African Teams
- JOJoe Opio
but I think history forces me not to, because no team has won-
- TNTrevor Noah
What does that mean?
- JOJoe Opio
Because no team has made three World Cup finals and won two out of them. So France made the final-
- TNTrevor Noah
You're gonna, you're gonna let history co- block you.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, 'cause France, France, France made the final in 2018, won it.
- TNTrevor Noah
My friend.
- JOJoe Opio
Made the final-
- TNTrevor Noah
My friend
- JOJoe Opio
... in the last World Cup.
- TNTrevor Noah
History-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... has shown that no one has responded to you swiping right, but that doesn't stop you.
- JOJoe Opio
We can change that right now. Where's my phone?
- TNTrevor Noah
That doesn't stop you, Joe.
- JOJoe Opio
We can change that right now.
- TNTrevor Noah
That doesn't stop you, Joe.
- JOJoe Opio
Because now you forget one thing, I'm on a podcast.
- TNTrevor Noah
Exactly, Joe. Anything can happen now.
- JOJoe Opio
And ladies love guys on a podcast. [laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
Anything can hap- Women love guys on podcasts. Women are always like, "Oh, more of this, please."
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
"Oh, please."
- JOJoe Opio
Give more guys mics.
- TNTrevor Noah
"More guys. Just talk."
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
"Oh please, we need more of this." Women are like, "Oh."
- JOJoe Opio
Okay.
- TNTrevor Noah
"Oh wow, you have a microphone and you're espousing opinions-
- JOJoe Opio
[laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
... that are not based in fact nor in expertise. Please, more of this."
- 1:07:15 – 1:10:20
New Nations, American Fans and Growing the Game
- TNTrevor Noah
I'm excited, bro.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm.
- TNTrevor Noah
This is gonna be a big one.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes, so-
- TNTrevor Noah
We're gonna be doing the, we're gonna be doing the watch party.
- JOJoe Opio
Yes.
- TNTrevor Noah
That's gonna be dope.
- JOJoe Opio
But also remember, there are also so many small teams. That's the thing I also love about this World Cup. There's so many small, small teams. Cape Verde, Curaçao, Uzbekistan
- TNTrevor Noah
Are you just making up names now?
- JOJoe Opio
No, no, these are teams [laughs] these are teams that are going to be playing. And I think, I, I-
- TNTrevor Noah
I feel like now you're just like-
- JOJoe Opio
I think-
- TNTrevor Noah
... making up words
- JOJoe Opio
... I think it sounds [laughs] it-
- TNTrevor Noah
First of all, it's Cape Town, okay?
- JOJoe Opio
Cape Town. [laughs]
- TNTrevor Noah
I don't know why this guy, you're just, like, making up things.
- JOJoe Opio
There are white people watching going like, "Is he casting spells?"
- TNTrevor Noah
Corazon, Corazon-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... is an, is a Spanish word.
- JOJoe Opio
Corazao. I don't, yeah. But I think, I think it's gonna-
- TNTrevor Noah
No, I'm joking, man.
- JOJoe Opio
Look, it-
- TNTrevor Noah
It is-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... it's great, it's great for them, but-
- JOJoe Opio
That's, that's the great thing about expanding the World Cup. It gives every country a chance. Uzbekistan, who knew, are gonna be at the World Cup. I think it also gives Americans a chance to learn geography without invading countries.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
'Cause normally, [laughs] normally the only way Americans learn about countries is-
- 1:10:20 – 1:13:20
Why the World Cup Brings the Entire World Together
- JOJoe Opio
... controversial, controversial project. And we went like, "Okay, next World Cup, the host should have a proud footballing history," 'cause Qatar had none.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah.
- JOJoe Opio
"They should have a great LGBTQ record," 'cause Qatar had none.
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
"Uh, they should, uh, have no corruption, no stench of corruption," 'cause Qatar had a lot of that. We went like, "There should be, women's rights should be respected by the next host," 'cause Qatar clearly disrespect human rights. And then we're like, "You know what? They shouldn't have, like, an immigrant labor crisis."
- TNTrevor Noah
[laughs]
- JOJoe Opio
That's what, th- th- that's the checklist. Oh, and also we went like, "Okay, there should be no gun violence. There should be no, they shouldn't have a broken healthcare system. They shouldn't have systemic racism. And they should be, okay, the next host at least should not be a failed democracy." And what did FIFA do? FIFA chose the USA.
- TNTrevor Noah
Mm. I hope you have a green card, eh?
- JOJoe Opio
They had one job.
- TNTrevor Noah
Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm.
- JOJoe Opio
And they somehow managed to pick a team-
- TNTrevor Noah
Fighting words
- JOJoe Opio
... with the worst record than Qatar
- TNTrevor Noah
... fighting words.
- JOJoe Opio
But still-
- TNTrevor Noah
I hope you, you don't have any international flights planned soon, buddy
- JOJoe Opio
... [laughs] but still super excited, because you know when the World Cup starts, then all that flies out of the window. The moment the kick-off happens-
- TNTrevor Noah
Hey, man, that's, look, one of the biggest things about it-
- JOJoe Opio
The soccer party begins. Mm-hmm
- TNTrevor Noah
... as soon as the FIFA World Cup kicks off, the world stops, comes together. And I don't even say this in, like, a cheesy way. There are few moments other than wars-
- JOJoe Opio
That unite, yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... that bring as many people together in one spectacle. There's, there are few moments that connect as many human beings as a World Cup. There are no moments where Corazao's gonna be having a conversation with-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... New Zealand, having a conversation with Iran, having a conversation with South Africa-
- JOJoe Opio
Yes
- TNTrevor Noah
... having a conversation with Brazil, having a conversation with the United States, having a conversation with Mexico, having a... There's no other event.
- JOJoe Opio
There's, forget conversation, there's no other event where people from Uzbekistan are going to be trash-talking America.
- TNTrevor Noah
Yeah, man.
- JOJoe Opio
And that's the good thing about the World Cup. Like, you get a chance-
- TNTrevor Noah
It's gonna be amazing
- 1:13:20 – 1:13:57
Final Thoughts and Outro
- TNTrevor Noah
All right, dope.
- JOJoe Opio
Mm-hmm.
- TNTrevor Noah
Thank you so much for watching the episode. If you enjoyed it, pass it on to a friend. If you didn't enjoy it, pass it on to your friends still. Let them suffer for a change. And don't forget to engage with us in the comments. Uh, if you wanna, uh, suggest a guest, maybe there's questions you want, maybe there's ideas that you have, you can chat to us. We will read through the comments, and we'll get into it. Either way, I appreciate you taking the time. Thank you for hanging out with us on What Now? And remember, we do this for you, so we would like to hear from you. Till next time, thank you. [upbeat music]
Episode duration: 1:13:58
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Transcript of episode Tbp020Y0UmY
