PSYCHOLOGICAL TRICKS To Boost Your Influence, Income, and Impact TODAY! | The Mel Robbins Podcast
Mel Robbins (host), Vanessa Van Edwards (guest)
In this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast, featuring Mel Robbins and Vanessa Van Edwards, PSYCHOLOGICAL TRICKS To Boost Your Influence, Income, and Impact TODAY! | The Mel Robbins Podcast explores charisma Science: Simple Cues To Instantly Boost Influence And Income Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator Vanessa Van Edwards about the science of charisma—defined as the visible balance of warmth (trust/likability) and competence (capability/power).
Charisma Science: Simple Cues To Instantly Boost Influence And Income
Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator Vanessa Van Edwards about the science of charisma—defined as the visible balance of warmth (trust/likability) and competence (capability/power).
They explain that 82% of how others judge you—online and offline—comes from whether you signal warmth and competence through cues in your body language, voice, words, and appearance.
Charisma is framed as a learnable skill, not a personality trait, and they break down specific research-backed behaviors that increase perceived trustworthiness, influence, and professional respect.
The conversation covers how to diagnose your current signals, practical tweaks for Zoom, email, dating, and work, and how to avoid “danger zone” cues that make you seem cold, weak, or inauthentic.
Key Takeaways
Charisma is a skill, not a personality trait.
Research shows highly charismatic people are simply very good at consistently signaling warmth (trust, likability) and competence (ability, power). ...
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Warmth and competence drive 82% of how people judge you.
From first impressions to emails and Zoom calls, people rapidly decide “Can I trust you? ...
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Master the first 10 seconds: hands visible, proper distance, no uptalk.
On video or in-person, show your hands immediately (wave or small gesture), sit about 1. ...
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Use body and vocal cues to intentionally project warmth or competence.
Warmth cues include real smiles (eyes engaged), slow triple nods, slight head tilt, vocalizations (“mm,” “wow,” “oh”), and gentle eye contact. ...
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Audit your current charisma and blind spots with feedback and recording.
Take Vanessa’s charisma quiz yourself and have others take it “as you,” then compare results; also record a Zoom call and code your gestures, voice, and facial expressions to see where you under-signal warmth or competence, or use nervous/danger-zone cues.
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Your words can chemically and behaviorally influence others—even in emails.
Using warm words (connect, collaborate, appreciate, hug, handshake) and achievement words (win, succeed, master, goals) in subject lines and body text can increase motivation, cooperation, and response rates, whereas generic scripts (“Follow-up,” “Best”) dampen engagement.
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Awkwardness and nervousness leak through specific cues—learn yours.
Behaviors like hiding hands, face/stomach touching, fidgeting, fake smiles, or incongruent expressions (saying something is “great” while showing disgust or sadness) signal anxiety or inauthenticity. ...
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Notable Quotes
“Charisma, more than any other attribute, is the single most important aspect of you being successful.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“You can be the warmest, most competent person in the world, but if you don’t show those signals, the world does not believe you.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“Your warmth and competence tell the world how they should treat you.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“If you are too focused on being liked, your need to be liked is getting in the way of your need to be respected.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“You are unintentionally sending signals and cues to people right now.”
— Mel Robbins
Questions Answered in This Episode
How would your life and career change if people consistently experienced you as both highly warm and highly competent?
Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator Vanessa Van Edwards about the science of charisma—defined as the visible balance of warmth (trust/likability) and competence (capability/power).
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
When you watch yourself on video or listen to a voicemail, what mismatch between your words and your body or voice surprises you the most?
They explain that 82% of how others judge you—online and offline—comes from whether you signal warmth and competence through cues in your body language, voice, words, and appearance.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
Do you lean more toward over-signaling competence or over-signaling warmth—and how has that helped or hurt you at work and in relationships?
Charisma is framed as a learnable skill, not a personality trait, and they break down specific research-backed behaviors that increase perceived trustworthiness, influence, and professional respect.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
What nervous or “danger zone” cues do you suspect you use regularly, and what is one concrete change you will test in your next Zoom call?
The conversation covers how to diagnose your current signals, practical tweaks for Zoom, email, dating, and work, and how to avoid “danger zone” cues that make you seem cold, weak, or inauthentic.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
How could you rewrite your standard email templates and meeting intros to intentionally incorporate warmth and achievement words that better align with the impact you want to have?
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
Transcript Preview
Guess what we're talking about today? You and me, baby. We're talking about the it factor. Some people just have it, don't they? And based on the research, when people have the it factor, it means they have charisma. So today, you're gonna meet one of the world's leading researchers and experts on charisma and body language, Vanessa Van Edwards, and she's here to prove to you that you have the it factor. Yes, I'm talking to you. And the skill of charisma, that is how you are gonna bring your it factor to life. Let's go, man. Class is in session. Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to an amazing, buckle up your seatbelt episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast. Guess what we're talking about today? You and me, baby. We're talking about the it factor. That's right, the it factor. I don't even know how to say it, but we're talking about it. Some people just have it, don't they? Just think about who you admire that has the it factor. I'll give you my list. Oprah, The Rock, the Dalai Lama, Taylor Swift. Oh, and the late Robin Williams and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Those folks, they have the it factor. Why? Well, because they have this ability to make me lean in and care about what they're saying. We not only admire folks like this, but we like them and we trust them. That is the heart of having the it factor, and based on the research, when people have the it factor, you know what it means? It means they have charisma. Charisma is a really cool thing, because charisma will make you more influential. It'll help you make a bigger impact, and charisma absolutely is gonna help you make some more money, because according to the research, 82% of people's impression of you is based on whether or not you display charisma. Did you hear that? 82% of someone's impression of you is based on whether or not you got charisma. I know I said it twice. That's how important it is. And here's the coolest thing about charisma. It's really easy to hack when you know the simple things you need to do. So today, here's what we're doing on the show. You're gonna meet one of the world's leading researchers and experts on charisma and body language, Vanessa Van Edwards. She's a behavioral investigator, the founder of the research group Science of People, the author of the bestselling books on these topics, Captivate and Cues, and she's here to prove to you that you have the it factor. Yes, I'm talking to you. And the skill of charisma, that is how you are gonna bring your it factor to life, so you can make an impact, you can influence people, and you can make more income. Let's go, man. Class is in session. I am so excited for this. So, let's dial up the skill of charisma. Let's bring the it factor to life. Let's increase our influence, impact, and income, people, and let's welcome Vanessa to the Mel Robbins Podcast. I'm so excited for this! Vanessa, I'm so glad you're here. Well, welcome. I'm so psyched you're here.
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