Your Dreams Are NO Joke: It’s Time to DREAM BIG Again & 3 Ways to Get Started | Mel Robbins Podcast

(ticking clock) (upbeat music) So this is one of those episodes where you're gonna hear a side of me you've never heard before, because I wanna talk to you about something that matters more than just about anything else, and that's your dreams. Your dreams are not a joke. Your dreams are not a bunch of fluff. Your dreams are not self-help. Your dreams matter. And step-by-step coach you on recognizing what your dreams are. And today, we are going to get into the business of your dreams. (upbeat music) Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to an incredible episode of the Mel Robbins Podcast. Okay, so this is one of those episodes where you're gonna hear a side of me you've never heard before. I am showing up with a level of intention and a level of, gosh, what's the right word for how I feel right now? I feel a sense of urgency to deliver the message I wanna deliver you today, because I wanna talk to you about something that matters more than just about anything else, and that's your dreams. Because you have given up on a dream that is buried deep inside you, and I am showing up today with a message that you need to hear at this exact moment in time. This is one of those episodes where I already have goosebumps because I know that you're meant to hear this exactly at the moment you're hearing it, that there is no mistake here. And I am expecting you to write to me after you listen to this and to tell me, "Oh my God, Mel, I needed to hear this," because there is a dream that is meant for you. Your dreams matter, and you may be sitting here going, "But Mel, I don't know what my dreams are," and I'm gonna tell you, baloney. You're probably so afraid that they can't happen, you won't give yourself permission to get in touch with them. And we're gonna change that today, because I believe that you were born with dreams buried inside of you, hardwired into your DNA, into your soul, that are personal to you, that you have a calling, a purpose that is personal to you, and you were born with it. It is wired into your curiosity. It is wired into your imagination, your creativity, your self-expression. One of the reasons why you're drawn towards certain things or certain people or you're repelled by certain things or certain people is because inside of your energy and DNA and your heart and your soul is something that is trying to come to the surface. And your life is always sending you signals. It is trying to get you to see and to hear and to feel all of these clues about what's meant for you. And even more than that, these dreams that are inside you, there is a flame inside of you that is always burning, and I realize when times are tough, you may not be in touch with that flame. You may be like, "There's no flame inside me, Mel. That pilot light has gone out." Well, in a human being, it is impossible for the flame to burn out. That flame goes out when you die. As long as you're breathing, there is a flame inside you that is burning, and your job is to start to fan that flame, that flame of desire, that flame of purpose. That flame is so tied to your dreams and to things that are meant for you, and here's another reason why we're gonna talk about dreams and why this is so important, because I know you're like, "Oh my God, Mel, I did not realize that we were gonna be doing this today. (laughs) I thought this would be a January episode." No, you need this right now. The- the- the- the signs are there for me. I'm a person that pays attention to signs and coincidences, and it is not lost on me that you have sent an avalanche of emails to my website about dreams. It is not lost on me that your DMs are now starting to say, "Hey, Mel, I- I've always dreamt of doing this," or, "I've always wanted to do that, and I just can't get started. I don't know what to do," and, or, "Mel, I don't know what I want. I feel that I'm meant for more, but I don't know how to tap into it." I am talking about this because it is very clear that this is something that you want me to talk about. This is something that's in the air, and so we're also gonna talk about this because this is foundational to you being successful in life. See, this is not a show for losers. The Mel Robbins Podcast, it's funny that, you know, this is like, quote, self-help. I don't think this is self-help. I don't think creating a better life is self-help. I think creating a better life is your birthright. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be successful. You deserve to wake up every day and feel like you're living a life that is fun and meaningful. You deserve to have great relationships. Why is that self-help? Why does that mean something's broken? I'm here talking about your potential. This is a show for winners. Let's just ask Harvard Business School about the importance of dreams. Do you realize 83% of people, according to the research reported by the Harvard Business School, do not have life goals and dreams? Can you imagine how sad it would be to go through life and not have dreams for what your life is gonna be about? That- that sucks. That's not what you and I are doing. In fact, I'd like to move the needle. I don't want it to be 17% of people have dreams and the- the rest of the 83% are, like, shit out of luck. I want this podcast to be part of a movement that shifts that so that it's 83%. Hell, 100% of us have dreams. And why does dreams matter? Not just because they're hardwired into your soul. It's like this mandate that you're born with. You know, there's a reason why a baby crawls towards things that they're curious about. Curiosity is a baby exploring things that calls to them.You as an adult have stopped following the call. We gotta change that. Harvard Business School says that you're 10 times more successful if you have dreams in life. And so, we're not only gonna identify those dreams, we're gonna start fanning the flame inside you today. That's what we're doing here on the episode today. And you can tell, I am showing up with a level of intention and intensity that you have not heard in me before. This is because this is serious business. Your dreams are not a joke. Your dreams are not a bunch of fluff. Your dreams are not self-help. Your dreams matter. Your dreams are what will make you successful, and happy, and connected, and alive, and your dreams deserve your attention. And here's the final thing, your dreams are your responsibility. See, they're inside you for a reason. They're inside you because those dreams are what are gonna make you come alive and grow into who you're meant to be, and they are your responsibility. Your dreams are your responsibility to pursue, they're your responsibility to argue for, they're your responsibility to believe in, to work for. And I'm here in your life because I believe in your dreams, I believe in your ability to create them, I believe in the fact that you're a winner, and I believe that you deserve to have a life that you love. And that's why I'm here, like your biggest fan, clapping on the side of a road race, "Go, go, go, go, go, you can do it, you can do it." That's how much I believe in this stuff, and I believe in it because there have been many years of my life where I have not had dreams, where I have been lost, where I have been spinning, where I have not been fanning the flame inside myself. I have been taking a bucket of water, and with my excuses, and fears, and self-doubt, I have been trying to extinguish that flame inside myself. It doesn't work. It just makes you miserable. So here's what we're gonna do today. Number one, your dreams matter, period. Number two, having dreams and fanning the flame of those dreams, it's gonna make you 10 times more successful than ignoring them. Number three, your dreams are your responsibility, and that's a good thing because when you accept responsibility for not only tapping into those dreams and giving yourself permission to claim those dreams, and to feel those dreams, and to work toward those dreams, you take responsibility for creating meaning in your life, for momentum, for growth, for goodness, for purpose, like all the good stuff that you deserve. And so, the times in my life where I have given myself permission to dream, to want something, to just desire the things that I want just because I desire them, that's when I'm on fire in life, that's when things are working. When I'm arguing against myself, when I'm putting out my own flame, that's when I'm miserable. And so today, we are going to get a masterclass in knocking it off. You're gonna get a master coaching session. In fact, you're gonna get to listen in live where I'm coaching somebody else, and I'm gonna, like, use this coaching session that happened a couple weeks ago in Los Angeles as a way to hold your hand and step-by-step coach you, coach you on recognizing what your dreams are, and to coach you on knocking it off. Your dreams are not a joke. Your dreams are serious business, and today, we are going to get into the business of your dreams. And then I'm gonna coach you on a simple thing you can do every single day to get deeply connected to those dreams, to train your brain to help you achieve those dreams. And don't you worry, don't you worry, we're gonna do lots of other episodes about tools, and momentum, and continuing to make them a reality, but we gotta get clear that your dreams matter. Enough with denying, okay? So here's how we're gonna do this. Couple weeks ago, I was in Los Angeles, and I was doing a live event with a friend of mine named Cathy Heller. Now, you may know of Cathy Heller, she's an incredible podcaster, and she is a bestselling author, and she and I did this live event, it was really awesome, with this audience, uh, in Los Angeles a couple weeks ago. And during the event, it was my birthday, Cathy surprised me with a birthday cake, and her sister, Barbara, came up, and her sister, Barbara, is this really awesome comedian and actor, and she did an impersonation of me. Here's the catch, one of my gifts is I have, I'd say, 100% accurate intuition. And the second Barbara got on that stage, my intuition went crazy, and I just knew this was a person who had given up on her dreams, and so I decided to go there. And what you're about to listen in on is a coaching session between me and a woman named Barbara. Barbara has a dream. She's very clear about what it is. Since she was 18 years old, she has known that she has wanted to be an actor, she has known that she has wanted to tour as a comic, she's known that she'd love to have a stand-up special on Netflix. She's been working at it, everyone, for over 25 years. She has come so close. And when I met her a couple weeks ago, she had given up on that dream. She had left LA, she had moved to Florida, and little did she know, she was about to get an ass-kicking of a lifetime. Okay, so what are you not doing?