![Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast [ENCORE]](https://img.youtube.com/vi/Vl8vAJ42R80/hqdefault.jpg)
Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast [ENCORE]
Mel Robbins (host), Vanessa Van Edwards (guest), Narrator
In this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast, featuring Mel Robbins and Vanessa Van Edwards, Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast [ENCORE] explores master Charisma Cues: Body Language That Increases Influence and Income Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator and charisma expert Vanessa Van Edwards on the science-backed cues that shape how others perceive your confidence, warmth, and competence.
Master Charisma Cues: Body Language That Increases Influence and Income
Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator and charisma expert Vanessa Van Edwards on the science-backed cues that shape how others perceive your confidence, warmth, and competence.
They explain that charisma is not personality-based or innate; it’s a learnable set of verbal, non-verbal, and vocal signals that make people think, “I can trust you, and I can rely on you.”
Research from Princeton shows that warmth and competence account for roughly 82% of how others judge you across contexts—from Zoom calls and emails to interviews and dates.
The conversation breaks down specific, practical tactics to boost charisma in the first 10 seconds of interactions, avoid “danger zone” cues, and use small body language shifts to increase influence, impact, and even income.
Key Takeaways
Charisma is learned, not innate—and it’s about signals, not personality.
Highly charismatic people consistently signal high warmth (trust, likability) and high competence (capability, reliability). ...
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Your first 10 seconds on Zoom can make or break perceived credibility.
Show your hands immediately, sit at least 1. ...
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Uptalk quietly sabotages your authority and income potential.
Ending statements like questions (“I’m looking for $100,000? ...
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Use purposeful gestures and facial congruence to reinforce your message.
Visible, congruent hand gestures (e. ...
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Warmth without boundaries kills respect; competence without warmth kills likability.
Overly warm people become people-pleasers who are liked but not respected, while hyper-competent types seem cold and intimidating; intentionally balancing both cues improves promotions, sales, and relationships.
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You’re always signaling—on email, in photos, and even while silent.
LinkedIn photos with fake smiles, sterile email sign-offs like “Best,” and disengaged body angles all communicate inauthenticity or disinterest; consciously adding warm words, collaborative language, and front-facing posture increases connection and response rates.
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Know your own nervous and lying tells to avoid sending the wrong message.
Filming yourself answering truth, embarrassment, and fabricated stories reveals your personal tells (e. ...
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Notable Quotes
“Charisma is not an innate trait. Anyone can learn it through a very specific set of cues.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“If you under-signal warmth, people don’t believe your competence.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“Your warmth and competence tell the world how they should treat you.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“If you’re highly warm, your desire to be liked can get in the way of your need to be respected.”
— Vanessa Van Edwards
“Right now, you are unintentionally sending signals and cues to people.”
— Mel Robbins
Questions Answered in This Episode
How can I quickly diagnose whether I lean too far toward warmth or competence in my own interactions?
Mel Robbins interviews behavioral investigator and charisma expert Vanessa Van Edwards on the science-backed cues that shape how others perceive your confidence, warmth, and competence.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
What are some practical ways to shift from people-pleasing warmth into more respected competence at work without feeling fake?
They explain that charisma is not personality-based or innate; it’s a learnable set of verbal, non-verbal, and vocal signals that make people think, “I can trust you, and I can rely on you.”
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
How can leaders use these charisma cues to create psychologically safe yet high-performing team cultures?
Research from Princeton shows that warmth and competence account for roughly 82% of how others judge you across contexts—from Zoom calls and emails to interviews and dates.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
What adjustments should neurodivergent people (e.g., ADHD, autism) make to apply these charisma principles in a way that still feels authentic and sustainable?
The conversation breaks down specific, practical tactics to boost charisma in the first 10 seconds of interactions, avoid “danger zone” cues, and use small body language shifts to increase influence, impact, and even income.
Get the full analysis with uListen AI
How can I design a systematic practice routine—on Zoom, in person, and via email—to retrain my default cues over the next 30 days?
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Transcript Preview
Oh, boy. Are you and I in for a treat today? We are gonna talk about the hacks and tips and tricks and research that you can put to use in your own life so that you appear more confident to other people. It's gonna help you make the impression and the impact with other people that you really wanna make. (upbeat music) Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins podcast. Oh, boy. Are you and I in for a treat today? I am super excited to talk to the expert that I have tracked down and gotten on the show for both of us. We are gonna talk about the hacks and tips and tricks and research that you can put to use in your own life so that you appear more confident to other people. How cool is that? See, I wanted to do this topic now because here in the United States, anyway, uh, it's gonna be September soon and fall is always like this second new year. A lot of people go back to school, they go back to work, they think about going to different jobs, they think about changing up their life in September. And so I thought since so many people are taking on new jobs or going back to school, right now is the time for you to have in your back pocket the best research, the best tools, and the best scripts that you can use to do a number of things. Wait till you hear the amount of things you're gonna learn today. First of all, you're gonna learn that there are three things based on the research that you must do in the first 10 seconds of a Zoom call. I bet you didn't even know that there were three things you needed to do. I didn't either. We're gonna give you tips for nailing an interview. You're gonna learn why you keep getting passed over for the promotion. You're gonna learn that a second impression is just as important as the first impression that you make. You're gonna learn why you should never, ever, ever fake a smile. A simple test that you can use to learn what people think about you in the first impression. You're gonna hear the major mistake that you make or a lot of people make when they speak, how to ask for a raise, how to be better at selling. So buckle up because this is gonna be an episode you're gonna wanna bookmark. If you are in real estate, if you are running your own business, if you have one of the social selling or multi-level marketing businesses, this is something you're gonna wanna forward to everyone because we're talking the foundational research, in fact, shocking research out of Princeton that you're gonna hear about that is gonna help you sell more. It's gonna help you be more effective. It's gonna help you get the money that you deserve. It's gonna help you nail that job that you want. It's gonna help you make the impression and the impact with other people that you really wanna make using hacks, tips, and strategies. And by the way, if you're introverted, guess what? So is our expert. So who is our expert? Her name is Vanessa Van Edwards. She's a bestselling author. She is a behavioral investigator. She is one of the world's most respected experts on the topics of charisma, communication, confidence, and influence. She's the founder of the research group Science of People, and she is here. That's right. Vanessa Van Edwards is here in the house and ready to make you and me more effective in just about absolutely everything we do. Vanessa, welcome to the Mel Robbins podcast. We are thrilled that you are here. And for those of you on YouTube, I'm gonna throw to the interview where I was actually dressed appropriately to talk to somebody of this caliber. And so one quick thing, you subscribe right now. Do not be a moocher on this kind of information. I need you to subscribe. Why? Because I can bring you a brand new video every single day because of the support of the ads that roll here on YouTube. You don't have to listen to the ads on the podcast, so please do a gal a favor and hit subscribe. It means a lot to me. It means a lot to our experts. And that way all new videos just get dumped right into your feed and you don't even have to think about it. I love you. Let's go talk to Vanessa Van Edwards. Well, welcome. I'm so psyched you're here.
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