Feeling Used? 5 Ways to Take Your Power Back | The Mel Robbins Podcast

(ticking sound) I don't know what is in the air, but wow, you guys are flooding melrobbins.com and the DMs with questions about whether or not you're getting used. There is a big difference between being used by somebody and being in a situation where somebody is used to the situation. I've got five takeaways that I'm gonna share with you, and the first one is this. (instrumental music) Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to an extremely useful episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast. I don't know what is in the air, but wow, you guys are flooding melrobbins.com and the DMs with questions about whether or not you're getting used, and I'm noticing a theme that as you listen to more and more episodes of The Mel Robbins Podcast, something is coming alive inside you, and you're realizing that there are changes that you want to make, that there is a version of you, uh, that you wanna bring forth, that there's a higher or truer or more empowered you. And as you start to make the changes, you start to notice, hmm, other people around me are not changing, and, um, starting to feel like maybe I'm getting a little used. And so today, you are going to hear from two listeners who are struggling with this topic, am I getting used, and more importantly, what do I do about it if I think I am? And I wanna just say something about this in case you're new. Uh, welcome, by the way. I'm Mel Robbins. I'm a New York Times best-selling author and one of, uh, the world's leading experts on habits and motivation and change, and I do believe that inside all of us, there is this higher calling. There is a truer version of you that is longing to come forth, and if you're starting to tap into that for yourself, you'll notice that you get impatient with people around you who are not. You start to notice people who are not growing the way that you are growing, and that's normal, and today, we're gonna unpack the topic of how do I know if I'm getting used and what do I do about it if I am? And we're gonna start that process with a question from a listener named Crystal.

Hey, Mel, it's Crystal, and I have a big question: how to know if you're being used. I have two adult siblings that have always lived with me. One has been unemployed for more than three years. Last week, my working sibling was placed on PIP. I've always been the big breadwinner, and they and my mom all lived in my home. My mom passed away four years ago. It's becoming increasingly difficult to motivate them and/or get them to understand the weight of responsibility is on me. I'm beginning to think they don't care and are enjoying the stress-free lifestyle they've become accustomed to, or they don't understand because they've never had this type of responsibility. I'm growing tired of carrying all the obligation, accountability, and responsibility. When are they going to grow up and be equal contributors or move out? Thanks for any advice. This is really eating up bandwidth in my head. I will add we had a horrendous childhood and largely why we all stayed together. There is safety in numbers, and we had to have a united front against a very abusive father and ex-husband. He abused us all well into adulthood. Thanks for any insight. Thanks for all you do.