The 7-Day Reset for More Time, Energy, & Happiness (Backed by Science)

You and I live in a moment in history where the world is now designed to steal your time, your energy, your joy, and your focus. You may have had this, kind of, feeling or you've been wondering, "Why am I exhausted all the time? Why do I never have time for myself? W- why can't I focus? Why can't I make progress on something that's important to me?" Well, I'll tell you why. It's because the world is designed to steal your time and energy. From social media to the crazy headlines that make you feel helpless, to endless work, to to-do lists that never end. I mean, I'm sure that there are so many weeks where you just crawl through your week and you get across the finish line and then you collapse over the weekend, and the next thing you know, oh my God, it's Sunday night and you have the Sunday scaries and you're just right back in it again. You're just trying to survive. I did something about it and I want you to do something about it, and I've boiled it down into this super simple seven item checklist that will help you fight back against a world that's stealing your time, your energy, and joy. Enough. The fact is, you can take control of this and you need to, and it begins by taking your week back. (clock ticking) Hey, it's your friend Mel. I am so thrilled you're here. I am fired up. Can you tell I'm fired up for today's conversation? Welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. I am so excited that you're here, and, you know, it's always such an honor to spend time with you and to be together, but today's conversation, this feels urgent to me. And that's why if you're a new listener, I wanna take a moment and intentionally, purposefully welcome you to the Mel Robbins Podcast family. I am thrilled that you're here for this conversation, and because you made time to listen to this particular episode, I know that you're the type of person who values your time, you wanna use it wisely, and here's what I'm gonna tell you. This episode values your time too, because I'm gonna teach you how to take your time back from a world who is stealing it. I'm gonna teach you how to take your energy and your focus and your joy back from a world that is designed to rob you of it. That's right. You heard me right. I mean, have you stopped to think about how you are now living in a moment in history where everything about the world today, it is purposefully stealing your time. You've heard the phrase time is money. Well, so is your energy, your focus, your joy. I mean, the headlines make you feel helpless, work is endless, social media, oh my gosh, doom scrolling, stealing joy, stealing time, stealing energy. And your friend Mel Robbins, I'm gonna tell you something. You have to wake up and take your power back. And if somebody forwarded this episode to you and recommended that you listen to it, I wanna remind you of something. You have people in your life that care about you. You have people in your life that believe that your time and energy is valuable. That is a very cool thing. And you're now with your friend Mel, and I believe your time and energy is valuable. And so thank you for making the time to listen to this, because the seven things on the checklist that I'm about to share with you, these are the secret, the foundational building blocks to you taking your power back from a world that is trying to steal it and purposefully, purposefully putting in place the seven things that will help you create a great week. And when I go through the seven things on this checklist, I'm gonna warn you, this is not like some super fancy intellectual crazy complicated thing. On the surface, every one of the seven things is gonna be like, "Oh. Well, that's a low bar." But they're so deep and so profound. The research you're about to hear is going to not only make every one of the seven things feel urgent, it's gonna make you know why they matter, and you're also gonna go, "Oh. Well, I'm not currently doing, doing these things. No wonder I feel powerless. No wonder I have no time. No wonder my energy is drained." And I can't wait to share this with you because you can do every single thing on this checklist, and the checklist is what makes this research that you're about to hear from Harvard Medical School, Harvard Business School, all of these incredible, uh, studies that have been done around the world. It makes all of this knowledge actionable and doable. And before I jump in, and I cannot wait to jump in because I can't wait for you to take your power back and start having great weeks again, I know you're gonna be going, "Oh my gosh. Slow down, Mel. Do I need to write these down?" I wanna make this so easy for you. I want you to have a great week every week, so I have a one-page download for you that you can print out, you can hang it on your fridge, you can put it on your desk, you can put it on your dresser. It's free. Just go to melrobbins.com/week. That's it. Melrobbins.com/week. Put in your email, I'll email you a download. Boom. Now you got the checklist for every week. And I want you to have the checklist because when you see it, it will remind you, "Oh. These are the seven things I need to check off, and if I check off these things, then I can plan to have a great week." But here's what we're gonna do, regardless of the day of the week that you're listening. Regardless of if it's a good week or it's a lame week or it's a hell week or it's a amazing week. I want you to listen to the entire conversation right now with me. I want you to learn and absorb everything. I want you to truly embrace the truth, the simplicity, and the brilliance of what I'm about to say to you, that having a great week isn't what you think it is. Having a great week is a combination of seven simple things.... and I'm gonna unpack all of them. But I wanna make sure that you understand, before you try to implement it, the whole process, the research, the step-by-step stuff. You're gonna be nodding along, you're gonna be thinking of a million people you need to send this to, so be generous with it, and listen, and then you can go to melrobbins.com/week and get the one-page download so that you're reminded of everything we talked about, and then you can implement it. I'm gonna do all the heavy lifting. I wanna set you up for success, because you chose to hit play, you chose to make the time for this, and so, by God, I'm not only gonna make this fun to listen to, you are going to feel so excited about the week ahead of you, because you're gonna have the seven-item checklist that's gonna make it great. All right, you ready to jump in? Me too. Let's start with number one, and the very first thing on the checklist to creating a great week is you gotta do a brain dump. Now I know what you're thinking: what is a brain dump? It is as simple as it sounds. You're gonna take everything that's up in your brain that's weighing you down and you are gonna get it out of your brain and dump it onto a piece of paper. It is the equivalent of mental vomiting. You're just gonna, blah, put it all out on paper. I have done this for years, and for years, the way that I've used a brain dump is any time I feel overwhelmed or I start to feel like I'm starting to ruminate, or if you get a case of the Sunday scaries and you're starting to dread the week ahead, or you feel like you've got a lot to do and you didn't get it done over the weekend, you need a brain dump. And here's what you do. You take out a piece of paper and you just start writing down everything that is in your head. And it's gonna be random stuff. Like, it is fascinating how much you actually carry upstairs in your mind, and you're probably not even aware of it, 'cause you're gonna start writing things like, "I gotta pick up the dry cleaning. I gotta make lasagna. I gotta call my mother. I've gotta finish that presentation at work. I need to finish reading that chapter. I gotta clean out the drawer in my bathroom." And it's gonna, it's gonna go, "Bah-bah-bah, bah-bah-bah, bah-bah-bah." You might have to put down, "I gotta stop crying." I've got, like ... It's going to be unbelievable. "I gotta buy the birthday present for that friend of mine. I gotta call that friend back." It is incredible, once you rip that seal open, how much is gonna come pouring out of your mind and onto a piece of paper. And one of the reasons why a brain dump is so liberating is because, first of all, every time you write something down, you feel a little space in your mind free up. It's really cool. The second thing that you're gonna notice is, holy cow, I actually carry a lot around, and you're gonna be kind of impressed with your mental capacity, and it's also gonna show you, no wonder I can't focus on anything, because I've been walking around up here with, "Clean out the back closet. Don't forget to call your sister," and, "You gotta pick up that thing." Oh, my ... You know, one thing that's on my brain dump is, we went on a family trip for my dad's 80th birthday, and one of the things that I've been carrying around ever since is, "I gotta get the photo album done. I gotta get that photo album done." You know how you do, like, one of those family photo albums with an online print photo thing? "I gotta get that done, gotta get that laid out, gotta get everybody to contribute their photos to the family album." I am carrying that around. And so, you're just gonna brain dump it out. In fact, I did one yesterday and I used an entirely new approach, so I wanna show it to you. Normally what I do is I dump it on one piece of paper. That's step one. Just get it out, get it out, get it out, get it out. It might take you 15 minutes, and then what you'll notice is, 30 minutes from now, you're gonna see that thing and be like, "Oh, there's that thing that I forgot. I forgot that I needed to do that thing at work, and so let me put that down. Oh, I forgot that I needed to send that email. Let me put that down. Oh, I forgot that I need to, uh, pull my sweater out of the washing machine and hang it up so that my roommate doesn't throw it in the dryer and then shrink my sweater into a Barbie-sized thing." And so you've got all of this upstairs. Yesterday, I did one of these because a brain dump is always number one on the checklist for how I set myself up to have a great week, 'cause we don't wanna carry that with us, right? We wanna get all that out so we c- have a clear head and we're also have a sense of what's actually important on paper. So yesterday, check this out, yesterday, I was so overwhelmed because I'm about to go on a business trip to Los Angeles, so that means I gotta pack, which always throws me into a complete frenzy. So yesterday, I decided, here's what I'm gonna do. Instead of putting it on one sheet, I got three big Post-it notes out. I'm gonna show you them, actually. I'm gonna show you one of them right now. 'Cause normally what I do is I'll put the brain dump ... 'Cause I know you're gonna ask. I'm holding up, if you're listening, I'm holding up just a garden variety notebook, and I keep this by my desk. I'm not gonna show you this 'cause I do not want you to actually zoom in on the insanity that is my mind that I write in here. But I'll often be at a meeting in work and I'll draw a line down the right-hand side of the paper and literally start a little brain dump there. It's not a to-do list. Very important, not a to-do list. I have no intention of getting any of this stuff done. I'm just dumping it down on paper to get it out of my brain because I'm starting to notice that I'm swirling and I'm getting overwhelmed. So again, very important to understand that a brain dump, not a to-do list. Here's another notebook. This one's prettier, I know. Even has my name on it, Mel. This one is the notebook that I use for, like, my therapy notes and important things, but occasionally, oop, there's the, there's a brain dump there. There's sketching of something that I wanna redesign at my house. Oh, here's another brain dump right here. Here's ano- Wow. I got a lot of brain dumps in this fancy notebook. But again, it's not a to-do list, and that's what's so liberating about this. You're actually just creating space in your mind. But that brings me to, how did I do it yesterday? This is a level up on the Mel Robbins brain dump, let me tell you. What I did is, I have these kinda big Post-it notes.I literally put three Post-It Notes out on the, uh, island right here. Check this out. And I put work at the top of one, and then I put personal, and then I put home. So it was work, personal and home, and I put 'em on the counter in the kitchen. And all day long, it was the most liberating thing over the weekend, I would just walk past and be like, "Oh yeah, I gotta get ready for the speech I'm giving for Microsoft. Oh yeah, I gotta remember to pack three microphones for LA. Oh yeah, I gotta make sure to, uh, do this thing that's not gonna make any sense to you, but the code is map and the blueprint and map it to the marketing ops job," which means absolutely nothing, but it means something to me, and more importantly, now that it's on this little Post-It Note, it is not in my brain. And that's what you need, and so whether you start this checklist by just taking out a piece of paper that is from your printer paper, or a spiral bound notebook or your journal, or you use this three Post-It note- note system, work, home and personal, and you just keep it out. Keep it out, and you just are dumping it out. That's what you're doing, and one of the things that you're gonna notice, and this is where things get liberating, is especially the things that were on my list for home, 99% of the stuff on my list is not happening this week, and yet I'm carrying it around in my head. I'm not gonna organize my bathroom drawers right now. That's not what I'm gonna do. I am not gonna go through the pantry and find everything that's expired and actually don't, uh, like, get rid of it. That's not what I'm gonna do. In fact, you wanna know what's come up on my to-do list for, uh, home over and over and over and over again? I'm almost embarrassed to tell you this because I've talked about this on social media. (laughs) I've... Think I've talked about this on the podcast before, but what comes up every single time I do a brain dump? Every weekend, literally, I have lived in this house in Southern Vermont for four years. We don't have a single photo of anyone in our family hanging on any wall. Not one. (laughs) Not one. Four years I have lived here. Four years, and not a single photo of our family hanging on any of the walls. And so every single time I do a brain dump, do you wanna know the two words that ends up on that single piece of paper th- or this weekend in my elevated home brain dump list? Picture wall. (laughs) I mean, I know you have something like this. In fact, as we were talking as a team about this, our executive producer Tracy was like, "Oh my God, I can't believe you just said that. My husband and I have lived in this apartment for almost a year. I am sitting next to a shelf that still has baggies on it. It is on my to-do list to organize the shelf. I'm not gonna get this done this week." And I'm like, "Exactly," and you still need to dump it on the brain dump list because this is not a to-do list. The whole purpose of this is to get you to get everything out of your mind so that you do not succumb to the Sunday scaries. Get everything out of your mind so you don't start the week in a state of overwhelm. Get everything out of your mind so you're not dragging all of this stuff that's knocking around in your brain like a pinball machine into this week. We're not doing that. So if you start with the checklist item number one and you just do a brain dump, and just write everything down, and just keep coming back to the list, here's for work, here's for personal, here's for home, here's for work, here's for personal, here's for home, here's for work, here's for personal, here's for home, boom, you're done, and you're gonna feel lighter. It's sort of like a mental spray tan. I got one of my first spray tans ever, you know, my 25-year-old daughter was like, "Mom, you gotta have a spray tan. You're looking really zombie-like, uh, lately in the videos." And so I tried a spray tan. I swear to God, I'm like, "I need to own a spray tan machine. I feel like I'm 10 years younger and five pounds lighter." You are gonna feel the same way after you do a brain dump. Okay, so that's checklist item number one. So now you're standing there, you got your brain dump, barfed out mental stuff piece of paper, or you got your three Post-It Notes, right, like I did this weekend, which I just loved because the other thing that I loved about the Post-It Note, I can then stick it into the journal that I carry around, so now I've got the reminder, you know, kinda right there. But you're gonna be standing there feeling 10 years younger and five pounds lighter now that you did your brain dump. That brings me to item number two on the checklist for having a great week. You ready? You're gonna free yourself. What does that mean? Oh, honey, you're gonna free yourself of all the things on that little brain dump that you're carrying around mentally. Here's how you're gonna do it. This is the most liberating thing in the world. You are gonna cross things off. There is so much on that list that you have zero intention of doing this week. Just put a cross right through it. Just take a Sharpie, wipe it right off the list. That's where you're gonna... You're gonna free yourself of the burden of carrying this around. My, uh, friend Tracy, our executive producer, she's not organizing her bookcase. Cross it off the list. I'm gonna tell you about another thing that I crossed off the list. So I have this, this box right here. I'm gonna show it to you if you're watching YouTube, but you can, you can hear it as you're listening to me. This is a FedEx box, okay? This big priority mailbox. It is full... of photos, full of photos. These are all photos. These are now photos in baggies that are photos that I sent to, I believe, the Today Show, like, four or five years ago so that they could scan some photos and show some photos, you know, like when they're introducing somebody. They have been sitting in a box next to my desk. Is, this is like a tractor trailer that I drag around mentally with me because they sit next to my desk, and I look at it and I think, "I gotta go through that. I gotta get those back in the photo album things. I, I, I, I gotta do something with it." Uh, like, you can hear this as you're listening to me. I, I pulled out, I pulled out some of them and I, I, I have... Look at this right here. I have a photo right here of me getting dropped off freshman year of college. This is a photograph from 1986. Why is this in my brain right now? Here's another photograph from December 1981 of me and Jody and my brother, an exchange student whose name I've now forgotten, ice skating on the lake by my... Uh, I, uh, this is in my brain. I do not need to carry it into the week. I guarantee you, whether it's a bookcase or it's photos that you need to organize or it's the junk drawer in the kitchen or it's the bag of clothes that you keep meaning to drop off and donate, there are things on that brain dump list that are staring you in the face. And now that they are out of your mind, dear Lord, checklist item number two, set yourself free. You're not doing it this week. Cross it off. Zero guilt. You are just claiming space. You are saying, "You're not going into my brain. Not this week. No, thank you. Nope. We're not doing it." Doesn't this feel good? Can't you already feel like, man, I'm gonna have a great week? I am not doing the family photo album for Peru this week, just not happening. Cross it off the list. Because without doing this, you know what I would have done? I would have been on the plane to Los Angeles going, "You know, I should probably work on that Peru photo album. I should probably do this." And then I would spend a bunch of time sitting there thinking about the things I needed to do. No. No. And neither are you, because you're gonna start this week with checklist item number two. After you do your brain dump, you're gonna set yourself free, free of all these things that you carry around, and you're gonna cross it off and you're not gonna have any guilt about it. You are gonna claim your time because as I said to you at the beginning, we live in a world that is now programmed and designed to steal your joy, to steal your energy, to steal your time. You and I, we are taking it back. That's what you're doing. You are mo- making room in your brain and in your body and with your energy to not carry this stuff around with you. You're setting yourself free. Isn't this fricking awesome? Don't you already feel like it's gonna be a great week? Of course you do. That's why you're gonna love this checklist that you're gonna print out and you're gonna have it right by your desk or sitting on your fridge to remind you, "Saturday or Sunday, this is what I do. This is how I create a great week." I don't even care if it's a Monday or Tuesday or Wednesday. If you've had a terrible week, get the checklist out. Start right now. You can reclaim this. Step one, brain dump. Step two, set yourself free. Cross off absolutely everything that you're not doing this week. See that? You are in control. I love this. Now, the third thing on the checklist. You've done your brain dump. You have now set yourself free. Oh, baby. Now, now is where you take control. Now is where you set the priority. I am holding in my hand one of these, what they call chisel tip Sharpie permanent marker. No, they're not a sponsor of the Mel Robbins podcast. This just happens to be my favorite marker on the planet. It is a big, fatty Sharpie. I love this thing. Big tip on this sucker. Don't get dirty in your mind. Come on. This is all art. I take this Sharpie, and the reason why I love this Sharpie is it's big, it is bold. If you're gonna mark something up with this thing, it's 'cause you mean it, and so you're gonna take whatever is that version of it for you. It can be a pencil for all I care. You can write it with a thing of lipstick. You can take... If you're a spray paint person, you can use spray paint. I don't care, because the third thing on the list is you're going to choose one thing. You're gonna circle that sucker. Of all the things that you've written down, I want you to stand in front of that brain dump. I want you to look at all the things that you've been like, "Nope, nope, not the bookcase, not the box of photographs, not the bathroom door, not the kitchen junk drawer. I'm not gonna get to the donation pile. I'm not gonna cut the lawn this week. Nope, I'm not cleaning out the garage. These projects are not getting done." You're going to see that there are things there that you're sorta like, "Mm, can't quite cross it off. Mm, can't quite set myself free." So as you stand in front of the things that are left, I want you to take a deep breath, and I want you to look at those things, and I want you to say to yourself, "Hmm, of all the things that are left on this list, what's the one thing on this list that if you were to fast-forward to next weekend, and you look back on this week that you're about to live, you fast-forward seven days from now, if you actually got a little progress done on that, if you actually moved the ball down the field..."... that you personally would feel better? What is that one thing? Is it picking up the guitar and playing for a half an hour? Is it cleaning out the junk drawer? Is it taking 30 minutes and spending that time sorting through some health insurance claims? Is it fixing lunch and driving it over to a friend of yours that isn't feeling well? Is it the bookcase? Like, really look at that list, because there's something on there that is meaningful to you, and if you were to just move the ball down the field, spend 15 lousy minutes on the thing, it would make you feel better, because it matters to you. This is so important. That's why I've got the chisel tip marker out here, because this is not about work, it's not about your family, it's not about what your friends want you to do, it's not about what your parents need. This is something that matters to you. And as I'm gonna keep on reminding you, we live in a moment in history where the world is engineered and deliberately programmed to steal your joy, to steal your time, to steal your energy, and to steal your attention, and if you're not careful, and this is step three of this checklist, the world will steal meaning from you as well. And so whatever that thing is for you, this is where you get to be selfish, this is where you get to say, "This is something that I really would like to find a little time on." Can you take a guess what it is that I circled this week after four years of putting it on the list? That's right, the damn picture wall. Mm-hmm. I circled the picture wall, honest to God, that's what I've circled. I have been wanting to do this for four years. I have been carting around these photos that I keep next to my desk, some w- of the photos in there are things that I would like on the wall. I- I- I- I literally said, "I am going to move from talking and thinking about this," which I'd been doing for four years, and it has continued to be on my brain dump for four years, and you're gonna have things like that too, this was the week. This was the week that I'm like, "I'm doing it. I'm doing it." And so I want you to do the same thing. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I want you to circle it. When you circle this thing, you're now committing to getting it done. This is a really important nuance here, and there's a lot of research that explains why I'm telling you I'm not expecting you to complete it. If you were to circle the bookcase, you don't have to get the bookcase organized. All you gotta do in circling it is find 15 minutes, I call this your hot 15, this is 15 minutes where you are gonna schedule time to just work on it and make progress, because you and I both know, in 15 minutes, I can't even find half the photos I need. I- I- I mean, I can't get much done in 15 minutes, but here's what I can do. I can actually move the ball down the field. Now, here's the reason why it's critical for step three of the checklist for you to put it in the calendar. The reason why is it's not real until it's scheduled. If it's not in your calendar, it's not happening. This can't be an accident. Now is where you get serious. Now is where you move from having plans to planning. And there's this famous quote, maybe you've heard it, "Plans are nothing. Planning is everything." And so what I am committing to doing, and I've now already done it, I did it this morning, is I did a Google search, "picture wall services" (laughs) . Turns out there's a lot of them. There's a lot of places online that can help you organize a wall of photos on your wall. I had no idea this was a thing. I guess I'm not the only idiot that's struggling with this. I also found a retail store in Boston that provides this service. I'm not gonna name them, 'cause they're not a sponsor of the show, but I found it, and in 15 minutes flat, I also was able to look in my calendar and find a Sunday, which is normally the day that I travel down from our home in Vermont down to Boston ahead of the weeks where we tape our expert interviews for the show, so I found this Sunday, and I figured out a Sunday where I could come in earlier than I normally drive in, and I made an appointment. Oh my God, I actually made an appointment. This is going down in three weeks from now. How freaking cool is that? I'm actually have an appointment, I've actually planned it in my calendar, I not only made the appointment, I was smart enough to realize I'm probably gonna be there for four hours because I'm gonna show up with this box that's been by my desk for four years (laughs) and my folders that I've got of all my favorite photos online, and I'm gonna get started. Do you know how liberated I feel? You now get to decide what matters to you. This is like the theme of the week for you. And what's super cool is you don't have to do it right then. Just flip open your calendar and say, "Where's a 15-minute block that I could work on this?" If you just get that block in, I'm gonna pick up the guitar and I'm gonna schedule it right here.... and I'm gonna schedule it for this period. My classes get out at three o'clock. I'm gonna walk back to my dorm room, and by 3:30, I'm gonna be sitting there with my guitar in my hand. And make sure to put it in your calendar, and make sure to put an alarm on it, because again, the world is designed and is trying to steal your joy, your time, your energy, and your focus. This checklist and these simple little tools help you take it back. When you get those things done, you do feel liberated. You do feel more in control. And there's a lot of research around this, and it taps into something called the progress principle. And if you and I have been hanging out for a while or you've read either The 5 Second Rule or The High 5 Habit, or you've been listening to the podcast, you've probably heard me talk about this. But I wanna unpack this, because the progress principle is one of the key principles that is foundational to my success, it's foundational to the way that I approach productivity, and this will change your life. And I wanna tell you about how this comes from amazing research that has been done at Harvard Business School. See, there, there was a study at Harvard Business School where they found that one of the most important things that you can do every single week is to have this sense that you're moving forward on things that matter to you. Now, it's important to say, they didn't say that one of the most important things you can do is to get a ton of things done on your checklist, did they? No, they didn't say that. They said, based on the research, the most important thing is simply to feel like you made progress, and this is a critical difference, because you're probably so focused on getting things done that you're missing where the real juice is, so you don't know what to squeeze. See, the researchers at Harvard Business School, they looked at 12,000 accounts. What they did is they had people who were working across seven different companies in different industries, they had them keep these journals about what they were focusing on during the week, and when they crunched all the data on 12,000 people across seven different companies, do you wanna know what they found? That the most common event that triggered someone saying, "Boy, I just had 'the best day,'" was that they made progress in some important work, either personally or with the team. Progress. The best day was not when they got the project done. The best day was feeling like, "Oh, I was actually able to make some progress on something that's important." This makes sense, doesn't it? I mean, just think about it. Have you ever had to paint a room? Uh, I mean, hasn't everybody? I, I feel like I've painted my entire house, every apartment I've ever lived in. My poor parents, every time Chris and I moved, I'd be like, "Come visit," and they'd show up and be like, "Okay, let's go to Home Depot and get some paintbrushes. We're gonna paint." Doesn't it feel good to just cut out the edges? Like, it almost feels better to make progress and get the edges cut than getting the whole thing done. See, here's the thing that they found based on the research: simply moving the ball forward, simply spending 15 minutes, simply making a small amount of progress. I'm talking, you made the phone call, you made the appointment, you watched the video, you picked up the guitar, you actually sat on hold and had one more conversation that is going to help you eventually solve the healthcare claim. Progress creates more positive emotions in you. See, you're in a more upbeat mood in general, and you also feel this sense of joy, and warmth, and pride when you know you're actually moving things forward. You also kinda have this sense of motivation. You feel more naturally motivated and interested in what you're doing when you make progress. It's almost like a little bit of forward motion keeps you feeling like you wanna keep it in motion, and that's what you're gonna also find. I guarantee you, if you find 15 minutes to start working on that bookcase, you'll probably do it for 30 or 40 minutes, because it's not the actual project that is difficult. It's carving out the time and getting yourself started and moving a little bit forward in a world that is constantly screaming at you for your attention. That brings me to number four on our checklist for having a great week, and this one has some awesome research around it too. You're gonna love this. So while you're standing there with the calendar open and you've done all these amazing things and you got the hot 15 scheduled, I want you to scan the week ahead, and here's what you're gonna do next, because item number four is plan your meals, and I'm only gonna ask you to plan one. Let me unpack this. I'm not trying to get you on a diet or have you lose weight. That's not what this is about. This is about having a great week, and one of the things that I've learned and one of the things that the expert after expert after expert comes onto this podcast and says is that food is medicine, and what you put in your body fuels your body and fuels your mindset. And one of the mistakes that I used to make is I used to let this happen by accident. You know, literally, I would not plan out the week. I would go to the grocery store with the rest of the planet every Saturday. I would be hungry, which basically means you're buying everything that looks good to eat right now. I do not have a plan. I'm just filling up the cart. Half of the stuff that I buy is probably going to spoil because I don't know what I'm gonna do with it.And if you, if you're kind of nodding your head or you're in that rut where you DoorDash every meal, you never cook, you don't have anything in your fridge, you get to work, you work till lunch, then you go, "What am I eating?" How about we stop that? Because one way to have a great week is to actually put on the checklist, meal prep. And meal prep in the Mel Robbins world is not meal prep on Instagram, okay? You do not have to make 75 meals, you do not have to prep high protein stuff. I'm talking about planning in one simple way so that you have a great week, and here's what this looks like. You're gonna have your calendar out, just scan the week, and then say to yourself, "What could I actually plan ahead?" And there's so many ways that this could look, it's incredible. You might have the kind of week that is so nutso that the only thing that you can do is make a brunch reservation for Saturday after you army crawl your way through this week. You're good. If you've planned that meal and it makes you happy, you're good. This could look like, um, looking at the week and if you have a roommate or you live with a significant other, or you're married like I am, or you have kids that are living at home that can actually cook, or e- or adults that are living back at home, it might look like going, "Oh, check this out. Uh, on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday we're all here. Why don't we figure out what we're gonna have for dinner that night?" And actually look and say, "Okay, I'm gonna make spaghetti on Monday night, I'm gonna roast a chicken on Wednesday, I'm gonna try this new we- recipe on Thursday." And then write out the ingredients that you need so that when you go to the grocery store, it's not like a traumatic experience. You're literally, you got a plan, you got your list, you know, Monday, Wednesday, Thursday. Another tip that I loved is that whenever I do cook or whenever my husband and I get together and we say, "Okay, you're gonna take Monday, you're gonna take Wednesday," what I love about it is we double the recipe, and then that means we got dinner or lunch covered for the next day. And when you do this, you feel more in control of the week. I mean, this has been a big thing for me and my husband because we are now officially, what's the term? Empty nesters. I prefer bird launchers 'cause they always fly back. But right now, it's just Chris and I, the two dogs, and the cat. And what has happened because I kind of slacked off on my checklist and I didn't think about the meal planning, is d- night after night, Chris and I literally emerge in the kitchen at like 6:45 after a day of both sitting separately, I'm above the garage working on the podcast and The Let Them Theory, he's down in his office working on his men's retreat, Soul Degree. We're basically busy all day and then we wander into the kitchen at 6:45 and because life has stolen our time, our energy, our joy, and our focus, we both look at each other and we're like, "What are we having for dinner?" "I don't know." "I don't know. You plan it." "I don't know." And now it's 6:45 at night, we don't live in a part of the world where restaurants are open past 8:00 PM so that's out the window, now we're opening up the- the pantry and I'm like, "Breakfast for dinner again? I guess it's breakfast for dinner again." And I'll be honest, I'm kind of annoyed because we don't have anything planned. And whose responsibility is it to plan? Both of ours. And if you want a great week, you don't wanna walk into the kitchen and feel like when you open the fridge the only thing that you see in there is a mirage in a desert because you haven't gone to the grocery store and you haven't planned this. So, that's what you're gonna do as part of the checklist. This is item number four. And it could also look like this. So last week, I was in Boston all week and I don't know what it was that got me all excited. Oh, I know what it was, it was this checklist. I pulled out this checklist and I was gonna be traveling to Boston and as I looked at the calendar and I'm thinking, "I am going to be living in a hotel five days a week. Every day we bring lunch into the studio and I know that the team's gonna ask me, 'What do you want to eat?' And I'm gonna be like, 'Mm-mm.'" And I thought, "Well, why don't I just make something? Why don't I make a soup that I love and just load it up into Tupperware and then eat it every day for lunch? Why not just meal prep for this big work week?" I'll tell you what, I made my favorite thing to make, our daughter Kendall found it online, it is fantastic, it's like chicken and spinach and jalapenos and scallions and ginger and garlic and it's like health in a bowl and you put rice in there and chicken broth and it's, like, so fantastic. And so I make this thing and then I put it in a huge Tupperware dish, and this is a funny thing, I literally put it on the floor of the passenger side of my car. Thank God I have rubber mats. I'm thinking, "Oh my gosh, I am so, um, organized, I'm so productive, I'm gonna be so healthy." I'm driving down to Boston for a big production week to interview all the experts and as I'm driving down, I'm talking to friends and catching up with people. I get to the parking lot at the studio and I park the car and I walk around and open up the passenger side, the fricking thing had leaked all over the front of the car. Thank God I didn't put it on the seat, thank God it was on the rubber mat, but literally an inch of the soup was now on the rubber mat, bright green. I'm like, "Ugh, oh my gosh." Anyhoo, that doesn't matter because I got it upstairs, washed it off, because of course it was all sloppy and I didn't wanna put it in the fridge, and I had it all week. And everybody... You would've thought that I had shown up at the studio having lost 100 pounds and having six pack abs. Everyone was like, "What did you do? Oh my gosh, that looks so good. You're eating that? That looks amazing." Everybody wanted the recipe. It truly changed my life. And, you know, I'm kind of making a joke of it, but here's the other thing that happened for me.... because I had taken the time to go through the checklist and I had decided that one way I was gonna take care of meals this week and my food, and food is medicine and food is fuel, was to make this soup and just take care of my lunches, is that it's a really healthy soup, and it's a really filling thing. And not only did I feel less stressed and I felt more focused, but the team kind of noticed it. My executive producer, Tracy, the one who still needs to organize her bookshelf, literally was like, "You need to make that soup every single week, because your body clearly runs well on it, and you're just, like, dialed in. You would come out of one interview, now you're eating your soup that you prepared, now you're ready to do the next thing." It was like boom, boom, boom, boom. Because I'm taking away the decisions and I've actually set myself up to be fueled by something that tastes great and is gonna help me perform. And so now that I've done it, I don't know that I'm ever gonna go a week without trying to prep something that sets me up for success, and that's why I want you to do it too, because based on the research, and the research is really interesting around this, people who take the time to prep their meals, and again, the bar is low for you and me. If you just prep one meal this week, you're winning. People who plan their meals, the research says you have better nutrition, you maintain a healthier weight, you save money, and it's better for your mental health. No joke, the research has shown that people who take the time to prep meals for the week have lower stress. Why? Because they have it covered. It makes sense, doesn't it? And again, this is one of those things, and every one of the things on the checklist is clear and obvious and sort of a duh, but because you have so much going on and because of the state of the world, I think we have forgotten the basics that actually made life good. And so do this. I mean, one pot of soup versus four takeout meals? Way less money, better mental health because you got no decision fatigue and you know that in doing this, you're taking care of yourself. And check this out, people who prep their meals have lower stress because they've covered something that can be a source of stress, and don't you also notice that if you wander into the kitchen at 7:00 at night and it's takeout yet again, it's kind of stressful. And if it's takeout, it's not gonna be that healthy. Certainly not as healthy as what you can make in your own home. Now let's move on to checklist item number five, one workout. That's it. Because that's another thing that makes up a great week. Can you just get one great workout in? That's all I'm asking. Not five, not seven, not three, one. If you wanna do more, yay for you, you're fantastic. And you might be going, "Mel, why just one great workout?" Well, first of all, if you're not working out because you don't have the time, because of course you wouldn't, you live in a moment in history when the world is designed to steal your time and your attention and your energy and your joy, so if you can't find the time to get that great workout in, then it's not actually a habit for you yet. And so it's never gonna be realistic if you feel like you don't have any time to say, "Well, I'm gonna work out every day." All I'm asking you to do, find one good workout, okay? One, because you can do that. You might not even be able to do it during the week, but you could do it over the weekend. I mean, have you ever had one of those weekends where you go away with friends or you are, uh, planning to do something in the city that you live in? Like let's say you live in New York City and you decide you're gonna walk the loop at Central Park. That's six miles, and you do it with a friend, and that takes, like, a couple hours. You look back on that weekend as one of the best weekends of the year. Why? Well, because you were out doing something. That's available to you now, and you can get it in if you plan and if you say, "All I'm asking of myself is one, one really good workout, one of my favorite yoga classes, just one." You know, I'm about to head to Los Angeles and there's a studio there that I love 'cause it's dark and hot and sweaty and I love the music. You better believe I'm checking the box on this checklist and I am gonna head to that yoga studio and be in that class and I can't wait. And the other reason why I'm saying just one awesome workout, because there's research around the power of one workout, even if it's just 15 minutes. Remember how I talked about the hot 15? Yes, one 15-minute workout makes a big difference in your health. This research comes from the University of Sydney, and the research was done in collaboration with institutions around the world and it was published in the European Heart Journal. Now, this study enrolled, check this out, 72,000 people and it tracked their physical activity over five years. So we're talking big study. And in the published findings, even the people who only did 15 minutes per week of vigorous physical activity had a 17% lower risk of death from any cause and death from cancer compared with people who did nothing. And with about 50 minutes per week, death from any cause reduced by 36%. But if you can get just 15 minutes in, oh my gosh, that's amazing. And how are you gonna get that in? You're not gonna do it while you're standing there with your brain dump and your things you've crossed off and the thing that you've circled and your meal planning. You're going to plan for it. And here's why. Because when you look ahead at the week, I bet you can find an afternoon or a morning where you can find time to go for a walk or you can ping a friend and say, "Hey, I'm gonna go to this yoga class or I'm gonna go to this, like, CrossFit thing. Do you wanna go with me?"And one of my favorite hacks to make sure I get this in is if I'm gonna stream a class ahead of time, I take the link to the class and I actually put it in my electronic calendar with an alarm. That way, when it comes time to exercise, I'm not searching for that thing that I thought I would do. In fact, I have exercised the last two mornings in a row because I selected a mat Pilates class when I did this checklist last weekend, and two days ago and yesterday, I'm like, "I can find the time. I can do it at 2:30 in the afternoon." And I scheduled it in my calendar and I put the link in there, and that way, when the alarm went off, I'm like, "Oh, and there's the class I'm gonna take." Isn't that cool? That's so cool. Just one workout a week helps make it a great week. Love that. You know what else I love? The sixth thing that makes for a great week, plan time for rest. Just find one moment of quiet for you. That's all I'm asking. You've opened up the calendar and you've found time for that one thing that you're gonna make progress on, and now you've layered in what you're gonna plan for your meals to the extent you're gonna do that, and you've found the one day that you're gonna do exercise and what it is and what you're gonna be doing and what time, all of that's taken care of. Now what I want you to look for is I want you to find a moment of quiet. That's it. Can you pick a night after work where you can just do something for you? My only requirement is that you're not looking at your phone. That's it. You gotta rest. Could you make a cup of tea? Do you have a book that you're reading that you would love to just sit down in your favorite chair and do that instead of turning on the TV or doom-scrolling? What constitutes rest is not being on your device, and this is hard because it's very weird. One of the reasons why we doom-scroll on social media and hours can go by is because it kinda lulls you into this trance, and we mistake it for rest. That's not rest at all. It's actually keeping your brain really wigged out and active and keeping your nervous system on edge and screwing with your dopamine. That's what it's doing. So that's not rest. What I'm talking about is scan your calendar and I want you to find a time this week where you can give your brain and your body a little rest. And here's some ideas. Could you carve out a half an hour? Just take a bath or stand in a hot shower a little longer than you normally do. Could you have a cup of tea or make a mocktail and sit down in a chair and do nothing? Could you pack up a towel and walk over to a park and just lay it out and lay down on the grass and just look up at the sky and watch the clouds? Could you go for a walk in the woods with the dogs? That's what my husband does. I think those are his moments of walking meditation and solitude and a reset. But don't take your phone. Don't be listening to anything. If you have your phone, keep it in your pocket. Don't be looking at it. Just be outdoors. How about picking up the guitar and just strumming for the sake of playing music and resting, or sitting down at the piano and just playing? Or if you're somebody that loves crafting, I mean, I'm a big knitter. Um, when's the last time that you knitted anything or you picked up your needlepoint project or you picked up your paintbrushes? I mean, if you're like me, you think that rest gets nothing done and therefore you don't wanna do it. You think that you gotta always be doing something. Well, I wanna tell you a little bit about the research on this, because the research says that if you are resting, you're just sitting there, feet are up, (sighs) reading the paper, or just letting the cat sit on your lap, if you're doing that, you're getting something incredibly important done. First of all, you're reducing your stress levels. This comes from a study from the University of Konstanz in Germany. They found that a short period of rest, even just 10 minutes, can activate your body's parasympathetic nervous system. Now, why do you wanna activate your parasympathetic nervous system? I know, I know, it's a big word. Parasympathetic nervous system is basically your calm, resting, confident state. This is the opposite of fight, flight, or freeze. Your parasympathetic nervous system is just this rest and digest. That's what you'll hear the medical experts say, and it helps you counteract your stress response. And see, your stress response is on all day long, so the first thing that happens when you put your feet up and you just rest is that it reduces stress levels. You are intentionally flipping the switch between the world that is stealing your energy and stressing you out and your inner world where you have the capability-... of resting and putting yourself back into a de-stress state. Pretty cool, huh? What's the second thing that you're doing while you rest? You're increasing your mental clarity and focus. Now, this is research from Harvard Medical School that found that activities like mindful meditation gives you mental clarity and focus. I mean, the fact is, you need to give your brain a boot. It's just like turning your phone off. How many times has your phone been like, "This is not..." Like, okay, turn the thing off, give it a reset, and then you power it back up. You're the exact same thing. So when you're resting, you're actually increasing your ability to process things, to face the rest of the day and the third thing that rest does? Well, it improves your physical and emotional health. A study from the National Institutes of Health and University of California found that allowing yourself time to relax can lead to better physical health and prevent stress-related illnesses. This is one that, in today's world, we do not do, and if you do not prioritize it, the world will steal it from you. And so if you feel burnt out, if you feel constantly on edge, if you feel c- chronically overwhelmed, you're procrastinating so much, you're gonna tell yourself you don't have time to rest. I'm gonna tell you, you can't afford to not rest. You gotta take this part of your critical life and health back, and the only way it's going to happen is if every weekend, you look at this checklist and you're like, "Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta fight back. I gotta do this act of defiance. I gotta rest in a world that is telling me I need to be constantly doing something." That's not true. That's not true, and this checklist is what's gonna help you start to make this a part of your week, and when you make this a part of your week, you're gonna have a great week. And that brings me to the seventh thing that is going to be part of your great week, and it is the seventh item on the checklist. You gotta connect with somebody, okay? So while you're still standing there and you've got the calendar out, and again, you've already gone through and done your brain dump. You have set yourself free. You've circled the thing that's meaningful to you. You found your hot 15 and scheduled it in for when you know you're gonna make progress on it. You have identified the one lousy meal you're gonna make, and if you make more, fantastic. You have also identified the one workout you're gonna do and you've put it in the calendar. You have also identified why rest is important, and you've actually scheduled time to do nothing. Fantastic. Put your feet up. You earned it. And by the way, what you just learned is while you got your feet up, you're doing three important things that you really need. Go you. See? It's a great week. And finally, icing on the cake. You ready? Connect with someone. That's number seven. Look at that calendar. When can you connect with somebody? Do you have time to meet for coffee? I mean, are you even leaving the house these days? Do you know I went five days, I was sick, but I went five days last week and I didn't even leave my house. So if that's you, I'm, I'm the same kinda person. You know, I, I, I c- I like my house and I also can just get so stuck in here, because I'm always working or busy doing something, but then I'm like, "Oh my God, I haven't left the house." Can you take a walk with somebody? Because it's not just the people that you see on Zoom or at work that matter. What about the people in your life that bring you meaning? And so if you look at your calendar, now you can find a time to either invite somebody over for dinner or go out for dinner or go for a walk or make a date to go to a museum or go meet for coffee or go meet for, like, go do something. Go walk your dogs together. And the reason why this is cool is because if you have the time, "Oh, I'm gonna go to this yoga class," this is how you can get a twofer in. "I'm gonna go to this yoga class. You wanna come?" Now that you have the time in mind, now you can reach out to somebody and say, "Would you like to meet up for coffee? Would you like to get together and cook dinner? Would you like to go do this volunteer thing with me?" And because you have this spot in your calendar, you can now make it happen. So I've mentioned that I often will go down to Boston. We, uh, tape all of our expert interviews one week a month, and so we do a huge production week and I'll drive down the night before the production week starts, which means I have hours and hours in the car, and you know what I love about that drive? The entire time I'm in cell range, I literally call old friends, and it's not the same people every week. I use the drive as a way to catch up with people, and it is so freaking cool to be able to catch up with people that way. I feel so connected to a lot of people because I use driving time as a way to just call somebody, and you know, oftentimes you'll find that you're like, "Well, I don't have a lot of time." No problem, call them, and when they pick up, be like, "I was just thinking about you. I only have seven minutes and then I'm gonna lose cell reception," or, "Seven minutes and I'm gonna get to where I'm going," and you can catch up and cover a lot of ground in just seven minutes. Another tip that's helped me a lot is, remember how I referred earlier to the fact that a good zone for me to find that hot 15 is to arrive at my desk about a half an hour before the workday is gonna start and to use that time at my desk to make progress on something? It's also a time where I will send a text or an email to somebody I've been thinking about.And it really does help. Or it's a time where I'll send a quick text to somebody saying, "Hey, I'm gonna be in LA and I'm going to this yoga class. Do you wanna go?" And this has helped me stay connected to people, and this really matters. It really matters. First of all, because I know you don't see your friends as much as you want to, and it matters because making friends and keeping friends tight as an adult is really challenging because everybody's super busy, and everybody's drained, and everybody's moving in a million directions. And so it's really hard to organize, but this matters, and if you don't go through this checklist at the beginning of every week and plan for it, the connection starts to fade, and you start to feel like you don't see your friends and you don't have friends, and it's not true. They're there. But you have to, in a world that's gonna steal your time and energy and joy and focus, you have to steal it back. And the reason why this matters so much that you find a moment every week to either connect with somebody on the phone or connect with them in person, it relates to the most important study that's ever been done on human connection and happiness of all time. I'm sure you've heard of it. It is called the Harvard Study of Adult Development. This study started in 1938. It is still continuing to this day. It is one of the largest running studies on human happiness and health. It's been running for over 80 years, and it's given scientists and you and me profound insights into what actually are the factors that contribute to a fulfilling life. So, what did they find about studying health and happiness in human beings for 80 years? Well, let me give you the findings in a nutshell. So Dr. Robert Waldinger is the fourth director of the study. He's been on this podcast. He's actually one of the favorite experts that has ever appeared on the show. And Dr. Waldinger said that the study is conclusive. You need relationships to make you happy and healthy, and the key findings are undisputed. Number one, close relationships, more than wealth, m- more than fame, more than anything, are crucial for you to have a happy and healthy life. So, that's why we're gonna put them on the checklist. And relationships protect you from life's challenges. They help delay mental and physical decline. Participants in this 80-year-long study that had strong social ties, they experienced longer, healthier lives compared to those who were less connected. People who were lonely and didn't make it a priority, they didn't have it on the checklist. They had it in the back of their mind, "Oh, I need to call so-and-so," but again, remember, you have to get it out on paper. You have to plan for it. Otherwise, it's not happening. People who were lonely had earlier health decline and were less satisfied with their life. And as I'm saying this, aren't you kind of thinking to yourself, well, this is why the week gets away from me? It's true. Like, it's kind of one of those conversations when you're like, Mel, you're just reminding me of what I know. You do know all of this. I know it too. But it's so easy to have your time and what's important robbed from your attention, and instead, you find your days just filled with this meaningless nonsense, or other people's emergencies, or your energy drained by stupid stuff. It's happened to me. And I love this checklist because you can come back to it over and over and over again, and this checklist summarizes into action the foundational research that creates the building blocks to not only a great week, but a much better life. You can find this checklist at melrobbans.com/week, but I'm gonna walk you through it real quick. Brain dump, free yourself by crossing it off, choose one thing that's important and schedule the hot 15, plan one meal that you're gonna cook, plan one workout, plan one moment that is time for rest, and intentionally plan the time when you're gonna connect with someone. You do that, you put it in your calendar, you check that list, you are having not a great week, but a fantastic one. I promise you. And don't just take my word for it. You can count on it because of all the research that supports everything that I'm telling you and everything that I'm doing in my own life. And what's also interesting about this checklist is that the weeks that I have a terrible week, guess what? I can look back and see that I didn't do any of these, or I only did one or two of them. This truly is the guarantee and the checklist to make the next week of your life a little bit better, a little bit brighter. And if you do all seven, I actually think your week is gonna be way better than you think it's gonna be, and you deserve that. And in case no one else tells you, I wanted to be sure to tell you that I love you and I believe in you, and I believe in your ability to create a better life. And what's interesting about creating a better life is that you don't do that over the course of years. You do that with the decisions that you make every day, and everything that you learn today is something you're capable of doing. It's something that you know how to do. It's something that I think deep in your heart you know actually works, and that's why I'm so excited not only to see what happens in your life, but I'm also excited to see what happens in the lives of everybody that you share this with when you use this episode as a way to connect with them and you share this with them as well. I just think the ripple effect is gonna be incredible. And so thank you for taking the time to listen. Thank you for spending this time together with me. Thank you for sharing this with people that you care about and want to connect with. And I'll talk to you in a few days. And in fact, I'm gonna be waiting for you in the very next episode. I'll be there to welcome you in the moment you hit play. I'll see you there. And for you, thank you, thank you, thank you for being here with me on YouTube. I just love spending this time with you. I'm so excited that you're watching videos that are helping you have a brighter future, that are empowering you to improve your life. That's so cool. Thanks for being generous with this and sharing this with people that you care about. You know, I know that you love supporting people who support you, and one of my goals is that 50% of the people that watch this channel are subscribers. It is free to subscribe, and the reason why it's important to subscribe is it's a way to support me and the team so that we can continue to bring you extraordinary videos at zero cost every single day. And so please hit subscribe. Thanks for doing that. I really appreciate it. And I know you're thinking, Mel, what do I watch next? I think you're gonna love this video, for real. Check this video out. I'll welcome you in the moment you hit play. I'll see you there.