How to Speak So That People Listen: #1 Rule for Getting the Support You Need

Let's change some lives.

Let's change some lives. When you know you don't like where you are-

(sighs)

... it's a great start. I started to realize I had been swallowing my dreams for eight years. Why? And so it all came to, what- what got me stuck in the first place? It was the word when. "I will do this when." The when is so powerful to us, that keeps us stuck. And what I had to ask myself is, what happens if the when never came? So, I'm going to do X, Y, and Z when this happens. What if that thing never happens? What now? And so taking away that when was very powerful for me.

I am so glad you're here. I'm just honored to be able to spend some time with you today. Welcome to the Mel Robbins podcast family, and thank you. Thank you for making this podcast one of the most popular podcasts in the entire world. And I also wanna start by acknowledging you for something. You decided to listen to this, and I know why you did, because you're committed to making your own life better. And I just wanna say, I think that is so cool. I am so proud of you. So go you. I'm Mel Robbins. I'm a New York Times bestselling author and one of the world's leading experts on confidence and motivation. And I have a simple mission, and it's this. I just wanna inspire and empower you with the tools and the expert resources that you need and deserve in order to create a better life. And lately, I've been seeing so many of you writing in from around the world, and you are having so much trouble shaking free of the guilt that you feel. It's almost like I can feel the weight of it as I'm reading your questions and reading your stories. And, you know, the fact that you have all these things that you would like to do, there are things about who you are, but it doesn't fit the expectations of other people in your life. Whether it's what your family thinks that you should be doing with your career, or what your spouse thinks you should be doing with your life, or maybe you don't wanna get married, maybe you don't want kids, maybe you don't wanna work in the family business or go to the school that your brother and your sister went to. Or maybe people are upset with you, and they don't really say it directly, but you know it, and it's because you no longer practice the religion of the household that you grew up in. Or perhaps you're just questioning yourself every single day because you're on this totally different path that your friends are on right now. And you think about it, and then you feel conflicted, and you wanna talk to the people in your life about it, but you don't know how to bring it up or... Have you ever done this? You actually do bring it up. This is what happened to me. You bring up this thing that you wanna do. "You know, I think I might start an online business." And the reaction, "Wait, you? What- what are you gonna sell? What do you know about that?" That happened to me. See, 20 years ago when I first decided I wanted to go into something called life coaching, it wasn't really this big thing, but I went through this big training program, and when I was done with the training program, I told a friend of mine that I was gonna start a life coaching business. And she looked me in the face and said, "You? Who is gonna hire you to coach them?" I felt myself disappear, and I bet you can relate. That may be the message that you're getting right now from the people in your life. So I wanted to track down someone who's not only insanely successful, but she is also radically confident. And I am absolutely thrilled that one of my dear, dear friends, I love this person, Lisa Bilyeu hopped on a plane in Los Angeles and flew all the way to our studios here in Boston just to coach you. So let me tell you a little bit about Lisa. Lisa is the co-founder of Quest Nutrition. You know that brand. Every single grocery store on the planet has like an entire aisle of their cookies and their chips and their bars, which by the way, was ultimately sold for a billion dollars. But that isn't just the whole story. Lisa's journey to becoming unapologetically and confidently herself began being a young gal dreaming of the film business, but she grew up in a conservative Greek family in the UK, and they were not all that thrilled about the film business. In fact, she was told, "Don't worry about those dreams 'cause you're gonna go on and get married and just support your husband." And you know what? Ultimately, that's where her path started to lead. And for the first eight years of her marriage, she put all those ambitions and dreams on the back burner. So it begs the question, how on earth did Lisa Bilyeu go from feeling like a bored, insecure housewife to one of the most successful, confident, and absolutely unbelievable people that I know and love? Well, you're about to hear the whole story, and more importantly, the advice, the tactics, the tools, and the scripts, I love scripts, that you need in order to take control of your life and own how you want to live it regardless of what everybody else thinks about it. And after leaving Quest Nutrition, Lisa is now the co-founder and president of Impact Theory Studios. She's a New York Times bestselling author. Her YouTube channels and all the shows that they launch have billions of views, and she is here today to be with you and me. So please help me welcome the remarkable Lisa Bilyeu.