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ADHD Chatter Podcast

Neuroscientist: "This one superfood WILL improve your ADHD" - Dr Miguel Toribio-Mateas

Alex sits down with clinical neuroscientist, Dr. Miguel Toribio-Mateas!

Alex PartridgehostDr. Miguel Toribio-Mateasguest

Apr 2, 20241h 1mWatch on YouTube

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CHAPTERS

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Chapter summaries

Coffee and ADHD: why caffeine helps some people and harms others
The host asks whether coffee is good or bad for ADHD, and Dr. Miguel Toribio-Mateas explains why the effects vary widely between individuals. He contrasts common claims that coffee makes some people sleepy with his own experience of anxiety and panic from caffeine, and he describes why he switched to decaf.
- •Caffeine responses in ADHD vary; broad generalizations don’t hold for everyone
- •Dr. Miguel describes coffee escalating jitters, spiraling thoughts, and panic for him after multiple cups
- •He notes genetics and how someone clears caffeine can influence effects
- •He describes decaf as a way to keep coffee’s non-caffeine benefits without the anxiety trigger
Why study the brain: fascination with the mind and its link to the body
Alex asks why Dr. Miguel dedicated his life to neuroscience. Dr. Miguel describes the brain as a fascinating organ that connects to and manages the rest of the body, and he highlights his interest in how the brain relates to the mind.
- •The brain is described as deeply connected to the whole body and central to regulation
- •Dr. Miguel emphasizes curiosity about where the mind “is” and how it’s accessed through the brain
- •The conversation frames his perspective as both scientific and experiential
A simpler ADHD life: “make your world smaller” and rebuild from there
Asked about the “secret” to a happy ADHD life, Dr. Miguel emphasizes simplicity and reducing overcomplication and rumination. He outlines an approach of shrinking commitments—especially social ones—then expanding again only with what genuinely supports wellbeing.
- •Simplicity is positioned as an antidote to rumination and overthinking multiple outcomes
- •He describes deliberately limiting social circles to a small group of trusted people after burnout
- •He suggests evaluating relationships by whether they “fill your cup” or deplete you
- •He frames “making your world smaller” as a practical policy for conserving energy
Boundaries, people-pleasing, and fear of rejection
The host asks whether ADHD makes it harder to assert boundaries, and Dr. Miguel agrees, describing people-pleasing as a strategy to avoid rejection. He shares that learning to say no is empowering but difficult, and he ties boundary-setting to staying connected to one’s needs and values.
- •People-pleasing is linked to avoiding rejection and the pain of being turned down
- •He notes how small rejection can lead to rumination for days
- •Saying “yes” when you mean “no” is described as common but draining
- •He describes boundary-setting as easier when you’re connected to what you want from life
RSD in the body: gut sensations, adrenaline, and fight-or-flight
Dr. Miguel describes his personal experience of rejection sensitivity dysphoria as visceral and physically located in the gut. He explains how rejection can trigger a stress cascade that feels like adrenaline and an immediate fight-or-flight response, along with rapid internal decision-making.
- •RSD can feel like a “pit of the stomach” closing or a knot in the bowel area
- •He connects rejection to adrenal stress responses and whole-body activation
- •He describes a split-second mental spiral: argue, ignore, leave, or physically retreat
- •He notes he tends to avoid confrontation and would rather exit the situation
In-the-moment RSD tools: labeling emotions, tracing triggers, and creating a buffer
Dr. Miguel outlines practical reflection steps for handling RSD during a flare-up without positioning them as a replacement for therapy. He emphasizes naming the emotion, identifying its source, and then taking brief actions to detach and return with a clearer perspective.
- •He recommends quickly labeling what you feel and tracing where it’s coming from
- •He suggests acknowledging that emotional processing can take longer in ADHD
- •Creating space—leaving the room, getting water, walking around the block—adds a “buffer”
- •He links impulsive reactions to energy depletion and prolonged rumination afterward
Helping a partner understand RSD: vulnerability over “playing the ADHD card”
Responding to a question about supporting someone with ADHD and RSD, Dr. Miguel stresses meeting halfway and validating both perspectives in a relationship. He argues that open vulnerability about impact works better than repeatedly using ADHD as a catch-all explanation.
- •Both partners’ ways of seeing the world are described as valid
- •He cautions against using ADHD as an “excuse” in conflict
- •He recommends stating honestly that something is affecting you and explaining how it feels
- •He shares that overusing “the ADHD card” has caused friction in his own relationships
Are ADHD emotions more intense? Dopamine, the “CEO brain,” and limbic takeover
Dr. Miguel says the intensity of emotions is often stronger in ADHD and explains this using a brain-systems framing. He describes dopamine’s role in supporting the prefrontal cortex as a regulating “CEO,” and he notes that the emotional centers can take over when this balance is off.
- •He describes stronger emotional intensity in ADHD rather than simply “more emotions”
- •Dopamine is framed as fuel for the prefrontal cortex’s management and responsiveness
- •He mentions dopamine availability and receptor distribution as possible factors
- •He describes a disconnect where limbic/emotional systems can override frontal regulation
“Pampering the ADHD brain”: journaling, handwriting, and dopamine flow
Dr. Miguel shares strategies meant to improve brain communication and emotional processing, with a focus on journaling. He contrasts structured gratitude journaling with “freefall writing,” and explains why handwriting may engage brain circuitry differently than typing.
- •Journaling is presented as a favorite brain-support strategy
- •He describes “freefall writing” as writing thoughts without worrying about grammar or perfection
- •He links handwriting to cerebellum engagement and a front-to-back brain connection
- •He describes emotional writing as a way to identify feelings, sources, and alternate perspectives
Rest, daydreaming, and the default mode network: why “do nothing” helps
The conversation expands into how rest and mental meandering can support brain function. Dr. Miguel explains the default mode network, when it switches on, and why activities like baths without distractions and “do nothing time” can feel restorative.
- •He describes the default mode network as connecting many brain areas and activating during unfocused states
- •He distinguishes resting/meandering from attentive viewing (e.g., watching Netflix intently)
- •He frames daydreaming as a natural mode for the ADHD brain and part of brain “repair”
- •He suggests allowing laziness/rest as legitimate recovery time
Alexithymia: difficulty labeling emotions and building emotional granularity
Alex introduces his diagnosis of alexithymia, and Dr. Miguel defines it as difficulty labeling emotions despite feeling them. He discusses overlap with autism and ADHD and emphasizes that targeted practice—especially writing—can strengthen emotional recognition over time.
- •Alexithymia is described as feeling emotions but not knowing what they are
- •He notes it can occur in autism and there can be overlap with ADHD
- •He ties improvement to neuroplasticity and intentional practice
- •He suggests tools like emotion wheels and regular written check-ins to build nuance beyond “stressed”
The “supermarket” food: kefir, gut–brain connection, and reported symptom changes
Dr. Miguel identifies kefir as the food highlighted by newer research and describes work he’s been involved in studying it with children and young adults. He explains kefir as fermented milk, discusses the role of microbes and gut–brain communication, and shares observed improvements alongside basic dietary guidelines.
- •Kefir is presented as a fermented milk food linked to gut-focused benefits
- •He describes a study approach including kefir plus basic guidance to reduce ultra-processed foods
- •He reports noticing improvements in impulsivity, hyperactivity, and sleep in participants
- •He emphasizes the gut–brain connection and the diversity of microbes in kefir
Foods he highlights for ADHD: protein, fiber diversity, and healthy fats
Asked what other foods are good for ADHD, Dr. Miguel focuses on foundational nutrition themes rather than a single “miracle” ingredient. He emphasizes starting the day with protein, eating diverse colorful fiber-rich plants, and including healthy fats, while noting options for different diets.
- •Protein is linked to steadier blood sugar patterns and dopamine building blocks (tyrosine)
- •He encourages a “rainbow” of plant colors to support gut bacteria and downstream brain effects
- •He frames dietary diversity as fitting the idea of neurodiversity
- •He mentions healthy fats (including fish oils) and notes alternatives for people who don’t eat fish
Foods to limit: ultra-processed items, high added sugar, additives, and questionable frying oils
The host asks for three foods to avoid, and Dr. Miguel frames it broadly as limiting ultra-processed foods and excessive added sugar while staying non-judgmental about occasional comfort eating. He also calls out artificial colors, many additive codes, and fried takeaway foods with low-quality oils and flavor enhancers.
- •He prioritizes reducing ultra-processed foods with long, hard-to-pronounce ingredient lists
- •He discusses high processed sugar and “unnatural” brightly colored sweets as frequent-use targets to avoid
- •He mentions foods heavy in additives (including many “E numbers”)
- •He cautions about fried takeaway foods, questionable oil quality, and added flavor enhancers like MSG
Late diagnosis and burnout: his path to assessment and childhood signs
Dr. Miguel shares that he was diagnosed at 47 after years of overdoing work and eventually burning out. He recounts intense work patterns, anxiety before presentations, and classic inattentive and hyperactive traits from childhood that made more sense after diagnosis.
- •He describes years of overwork, people-pleasing, and exhaustion culminating in burnout
- •A colleague’s ADHD diagnosis and medication experience helped prompt him to seek assessment
- •He recalls frequent forgetfulness as a young person (keys, books, birthdays)
- •He describes being academically strong but often disruptive and humorous as a dopamine-seeking coping style
Friendships, marriage, and acceptance: living with intensity and quirks
The conversation turns to how ADHD shows up socially and in his marriage. Dr. Miguel describes patterns of intense focus on people followed by moving on, and in marriage he emphasizes learning each other’s quirks, making space for processing, and practicing acceptance on both sides.
- •He describes a small “core” friend group that understands gaps in attention or contact
- •He links relationship stability to making life easier and more comfortable with ADHD’s challenges
- •He describes himself as “full on” and not suited to a drama-free, low-intensity partnership
- •He highlights acceptance, self-compassion, and finding middle ground as key relationship principles
ADHD life details: headphones, the ADHD tax, and big impulsive moves
In the closing segments, the host asks quick-hit community and personal questions. Dr. Miguel explains why headphones represent ADHD for him (noise sensitivity and music repetition), shares how ADHD tax shows up in forgotten subscriptions and fees, and recounts impulsive decisions like moving countries and spontaneous travel.
- •Headphones help with noise sensitivity and also deliver dopamine through music repetition
- •He describes replaying favorite tracks many times and long-term repeat listening habits
- •He names forgotten subscriptions, trial cancellations, and unexpected fees as common ADHD-tax traps
- •He shares impulsive choices including moving to the UK at 21, quitting jobs dramatically, and buying a one-way ticket to Greece

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