EVERY SPOKEN WORD
150 min read · 30,104 words- 0:00 – 2:03
Intro
- LALabrinth
My tour manager came back stage and he was like, "You know you almost killed someone today." Like, literally it's like blackouts. (dramatic music) Labyrinth, come in. (energetic music) We can make an earthquake up in here. Let's build it. I signed to Simon Cowell because my manager at the time was like, "It's a bigger check. You're in a label that is gonna prioritize you 'cause you're not like anything on their label." This business comes around it and it says, "We can turn this into money," but allowed someone else to tell me what my next direction is. Yeah. Everyone was like, "Be a star, have an entourage, and who you gonna go out with?" And I was like, "What do you mean?" "Oh, maybe Cher Lloyd." And I was like, "What? (laughs) None of this shit means anything to me." I just was like, "I'm not enjoying this." I didn't ask myself what I wanted because I was always accommodating what everyone else wanted.
- SBSteven Bartlett
When did you realize that something had to change?
- LALabrinth
Well, that's a deep one now. (dramatic music) I was at a place where I couldn't actually talk to people 'cause I had social anxiety. My manager was being weird. Our relationship was breaking down. I had no confidence. I felt suppressed. (energetic music) I got, like, diagnosed with ADHD. When I read about what it's like, I was like, "Oh, shit, that makes sense." I can't even hold a conversation with someone.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Was it prohibiting your life?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, 100%. Still does today, but I've learned to be aware of it. Let's just do something. Just let it go. Euphoria was the first time I felt people actually heard the rawest form of Lab. Getting to that point was true freedom.
- SBSteven Bartlett
What are your goals now?
- LALabrinth
The most important thing in my career is to- (music stops)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Before this episode starts, I have a small favor to ask from you. Two months ago, 74% of people that watch this channel didn't subscribe. We're now down to 69%. My goal is 50%, so if you've ever liked any of the videos we've posted, if you like this channel, can you do me a quick favor and hit the subscribe button? It helps this channel more than you know, and the bigger the channel gets, as you've seen, the bigger the guests get. Thank you, and enjoy this episode. (upbeat music)
- 2:03 – 6:39
Early context
- SBSteven Bartlett
Lab, if this podcast has taught me one thing, it's that we're all created by, and defined and shaped and molded by our earliest context. So when you think about your earliest context and how that shaped who you are today, and the person you went on to be, I'm talking about the, like, deep characteristics you have, the deep passions you have, and all those things that were nurtured in those earliest years. What is your early context? What do I need to know about that context to understand you?
- LALabrinth
Well, that's a deep one now. Um, I... The first thing that comes to my mind is church. Um, family was super religious, not always in the best way. Um, and not that I don't think there's anything wrong with religion, it just was, it was wrapped in a lot of things, um, that I don't always think is healthy. But, um, a lot of, there was a lot of beauty as well, uh, in terms of music, um, worship, and for me in worship was work with energy. Like seeing somebody connect with an energy or taking them from their body with a sound or with an, with a, um, with connection in a church, like seeing that happen like every Sunday can do something to you, and you kinda learn from it. Um, so that, that was always beautiful and just watching my family 'cause they're... Like, I don't know how this happened, but just everyone can sing or play an instrument or they have some kind of musical talent. That was super inspiring to be around. Um, and then having a massive family as well was, I think, uh, heavily shaped me because I always say this to people about standing in the middle of my house when I was, I don't know, 10. I would have my sisters upstairs singing, like, R&B records, my brother downstairs with his friends playing, like, Yellowjackets jazz music and, like, I don't know, like, um, Weather Report. And then my other brother ciphering in a room with his friends, rapping and, um, banging on an MPC drum machine, and, like, being in the middle of that was like, "I wanna do all of them." (laughs) Um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Wow.
- LALabrinth
... um, and, like, it was just mad, like, insanely inspiring just to be around all of these big personalities, um, that even today when I make music, I'm like, "Would, would my sister like this? Would my brother like this? Would my family feel this?" Um...
- SBSteven Bartlett
Where did that come from, that musical household? Who inspired that? Parents? Grandparents?
- LALabrinth
It's weird 'cause on my mom's side, I think it's the church, honestly, 'cause my mom and dad were both in, in the church. Um, and they both went to the same church. My granddad was a reverend at, um, this, uh, the church and his... Uh, my aunties and uncles used to sing around, uh, and, and like kind of do praise and worship and, and do like a circuit around the country, and that kind of passed down to us, um, on my mother's side. And then on my dad's side, he's a guitarist. He's, uh, well, rest in peace, he's, he was a guitarist. He was a bass player. Um, and his whole family were also in the musical side of the church, so it'd be like my mom and her family singing and my dad in the kind of, uh, um, playing with the musicians. So it was just kinda like always, always, it was always around when I was a kid, and I think music has been like, I guess like my, the other sibling that I didn't know was there, you know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
That, um, that was related to us. And I think, um, yeah, I think it was between Christianity and thing, that was the beginning to me because my house was very, very heavily bordered around church. Everything, like literally we couldn't watch, uh, TV and if, uh, without like, uh, the TV being turned off when somebody was kissing. So that romance was like, "Oh, whoa, that's just of the devil." And then when I went to school, that's when the...... it was like the kaleidoscope went wild and it was like, "Oh, shit." (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs) Too much stuff.
- LALabrinth
All of this stuff exists. Um, I really did feel like that when I was a kid. I was... 'Cause it was so sheltered, going to Central London was like going to another country to me. Like, that's how sheltered it was. And it was like home, church, and then everything else around that was like, "I'm in a whole other world." So growing up for me was just like discovering this other, other universe or other dimension, if that makes sense too.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah,
- 6:39 – 13:03
Your relationship with your mother and father
- SBSteven Bartlett
yeah.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
What was your, what was your relationship like with your mother and father?
- LALabrinth
Woo. Um, my mother was, um... Like I was saying, the church was beautiful but also toxic, and my mother was, um, sh- kind of shunned from the church because she had, uh, children out of wedlock, and, um, like I'm saying, it's very heavily guarded and boarded. So she was, um, she was kind of, uh, disowned by a lot of, uh, our family. And, um, she, she had moved from North London to Hackney, and from then on, I didn't, I don't think I saw my grandparents for years, like, um, after that, like, after she was kind of put out. One thing that happens in Jamaica is because of a lot of them came over here to the land of milk and honey, um, with race, anything white was better. So my mom was one of the darkest of her family, and she grew up with, um, being kind of very, uh, a, a lot of her life was very shunned. Like, it was like, "You're, you're the darker one of the family, so, um, don't, don't shoot for the, don't shoot for the stars. Just, just stay on the ground," you know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Um, and so because she was around a lot of that energy, when she was on her own, she kind of... It's like she made a promise to herself to not do that to her kids. And so growing up with my mom, it was very super supportive.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Really?
- LALabrinth
Um, she used to teach us... My mom, like I was saying, it was very sheltered around, uh, uh, and very religious. She wasn't taught, because women were supposed to be in the house, women are supposed to clean and do all this, uh, have a husband, and your husband will go and make the money and do all that stuff around it. So she, she came out of this kind of, uh, uh, community and had no understanding of taxes, no understanding of how to keep a house, no understanding of a business. N- Nothing. She didn't know anything. And so she literally had to learn from scratch, and would study psychology and study transactional analysis and study willpower, and she would teach us and sit us all around the table and be like, "What is willpower?" And I remember, I remember like vividly like nine of us sitting around a table, and at the time, we're like, "Mom, come on. This is so boring. Why do we have to do this?" But she would kind of pull us into it, and then we would end up having these big conversations about things that we just n- we never understood or never got, and she just wanted to make sure she could give us something, because she had no money and she was just kind of surviving. She, she nurtured our musi- uh, music. She nurtured our creativity. And when she was coming up, that wasn't nurtured. It was, "Shut up, sit down, and don't get in our way." Um, that was-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
... her upbringing. And it j- i- it wasn't just my grandparents. That was very much common in a lot of the parents of the '60s. It was just like, "Children are to be seen and not heard," you know? And, "Don't, don't embarrass me in front of my friends." That was very much that. And then with my dad, my dad was... He was, um, very much ab- abused when he was a kid by, um, his grandparent, by, by his stepfather. He was beaten a lot when he was a kid, and I think that affected him as a, as a man, like as a father, and he left home when he was 15. So he wasn't r- there for me. I didn't see my dad when I was a kid. Um, but I, I pity his beginning, like, 'cause I get why he became who he became.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Um, he was super musical, and I think that was maybe the most inspiring thing, and that's the thing I, I got from him. I always used to see him playing his guitar.
- SBSteven Bartlett
When did he leave your household?
- LALabrinth
He left...
- SBSteven Bartlett
How old were you?
- LALabrinth
Shit, I don't even remember. That's, that's how long ago... Like, I was young. I was super young, and I think he came back... Well, he must've came back twice because my... (laughs) I have two brothers and sisters younger than me. So, um, and my... Yeah, he came... Um, uh, um, I think he left, I think he left on me. Um, and then my two sisters, um, that are younger than me, Rachel and Jessica, um, he came back around and they were trying to like kind of, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Rekindle.
- LALabrinth
... rekindle, yeah, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Do you not remember the, the household changing in any way when, when he left?
- LALabrinth
I think I was too young. Like, I was, I was really young. So, so when I grew up not giving a shit that I didn't have a dad, uh, like if, if that makes sense.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Like, um, I didn't have a connection with him. I didn't s- um, I didn't know him that way. A lot of my older brothers and sisters were very close and very like, "This is my guy. This is..." You know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- LALabrinth
Like, my kids are v- like, I'm best friends with my kids. I love, I... Like, I'm, I'm... We have our own private jokes. We... You know? Like-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Like, we have that. I never had that with my dad, so I didn't feel like anyone left. I only noticed how important he was when he died. Like, I was like, "Oh, shit, you needed that," and like, it was like, it was like, "Whoa." It got-
- SBSteven Bartlett
You only noticed how important he was when he died?
- LALabrinth
Yeah. Honestly. Like, honestly. B- before then, I was just like, "Oh, he's just a spern, sperm donor." Like, I don't really... It does, it doesn't matter to me. It doesn't... Like, it's like... It was... Uh, and it wasn't even by my mom. It was just like I, I didn't, I wasn't bothered about it, you know? Um, but then when he died, I was like... I, I, I had kids then. He hadn't met my, my kids. And I remember my... I was putting my daughter to sleep, and she had a bad dream and I said, um, "I got you. Don't worry, I'm here." And I was like, "Shit, I've never heard that." And I was like, "Oh, that's what... Like, that's a dad." If you get me, like, that's, that's how important that part of your life is. And then I was like, also you inherit things from your parents. Like, and that's not money. That's not wealth.You do, of course, inherit those things. But I think the most important thing you inherit from your parents is memories, even, uh, like, mental health support. Like, my dad always said this. Like, that sometimes is like petrol in your tank when you're like, "Um, I don't know how to get this business off the ground. I remember dad always said this. I remember mom said don't ... never give up." That, all that stuff, like, I didn't grow up with that. Like, if you get what I mean. So, um, that hit me when I, when I was like, "My dad's gone." And, and I understood how, like, instrumental a parent could be in your life when those, um, when those things are around, you know? Um, yeah, so that's what I saw anyway. But, but yeah, that's really, like, my parents in terms of how they affected
- 13:03 – 18:40
Comparing yourself to others
- LALabrinth
me.
- SBSteven Bartlett
I often, like, f- ... I think I figured myself out in hindsight by ... almost by comparison of, like, comparing me to my peers. At a very young age, you kinda-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... notice how you're different from your peers.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Even from your brothers and sisters.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
I've got four. There's four of us in my family, kids. I'm the youngest of four. And much of how I've understood myself is by realizing what I'm not.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
You know what I mean?
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
So when you think about, like, at that young age, under the age of 18, what ... Who do ... were you figuring out that you were in comparison to the, the outside world?
- LALabrinth
Even with my brothers and sisters, I remember coming home with, um, indie records, and I remember I was working with a girl. And she played me Blondie and, uh, like, like loads of, loads of, like, like, kind of, uh, 70s, 80s, uh, indie records. I was like, "Shit, this is fun." Like I've ... I always wanted to delve in things that were foreign to me, 'cause I was like, "Okay, I grew up with grime, I grew up with hip hop. I get it." But it was like, "Where ... What are these things I don't understand?" And, and then when I would bring them home, I'd be like, "Check this out." (laughs) And they would be like, "Okay, bro." (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
Especially coming from the background of, like, gospel and, um, like, kind of like, you know, Black music.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Um, um, it was weird to come home with music that, that was so foreign, you know? And so nobody even knew how to compliment me on it, but go like, "You're doing your thing, I guess." Like, (laughs) you know? And, and I feel like I've seen that happen, uh, consistently in my life, where I grew up around grime, grew up around grime artists. I went to grime raves. But I never wanted to make grime, and I never felt like I was, um, the kind of Black guy that I was supposed to be when I was in th- those environments. I was like ... I was always weird, or like, I never knew all the dances. I used to dance funky, and like, I was just ... I just knew, like, "I don't know if I'm supposed to be here." (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
If, if I had 16-year-old you-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... s- 16, 16-year-old self.
- LALabrinth
Weird. Weird as hell. Just, just remember when my girlfriend told me about how when she met m- uh, my wife now, but w- when she was my girlfriend, she was like, "I remember seeing you years ago, and um, uh, you would wear a durag. I would be wearing like a, um ..." You know those capes, like Marilyn Manson capes?
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
Like, it was like fucking black-ass ja- like long-ass jacket. I would have like a ... You know those metal fingers? Um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
- LALabrinth
... They're night fingers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
The tube.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, the tube. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah, yeah.
- LALabrinth
I used to have a night finger on, and it had like, uh, a crucifix on it, and it was crazy. I don't know why I was wearing it, but I wore it. And then I had like a Dunlop cap-
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- 18:40 – 21:54
When did you start music
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
When did you start focusing on music? What age?
- LALabrinth
I don't know, because-
- SBSteven Bartlett
You don't know, just s- yeah.
- LALabrinth
It was just kind of like, I, I guess in school I had a band called Dynamics and one of the guys that was in it, um, you might know him, is Flow. He's a sick producer. He done Little Simz album. He's done so many cool albums. Like most of the stuff that everyone's loving right now he's kind of had a hand in. Um, and, um, we had a band in school, in s- um, Stoke Newington. Yeah, that would, (laughs) that would inspire, that would inspire a lot of stuff like, um, we were making our own music. We were like, "We're going to be the biggest band in the world." We used to argue all the time like we were like, like flipping Rolling Stones. We thought we were like, like rock stars. And in our school we would give out flyers and make our own flyers. Um, and like stick them up around the school, like, "Come to our concert," and all this stuff. So we were just very, very like brashy and like, "We got this."
- SBSteven Bartlett
What age was this?
- LALabrinth
This, this was like what-
- SBSteven Bartlett
When that, when that band started popping?
- LALabrinth
14.
- SBSteven Bartlett
So you leave secondary school at like 16 years old, right?
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
That's around when-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Uh, at that point what, what's your orientation in life? If I'd asked you what, what you're going to be when you grow, grow up, what would you have told me at 16 upon leaving school?
- LALabrinth
Everyone knew I was going to be a musician. Everyone.
- SBSteven Bartlett
By that point?
- LALabrinth
Literally like I remember leaving, like I, we had that in my classroom in school. They were like, everyone wrote down, "Who do you think is going to be the most successful? Who do you think is going to be rich first? Who do you think is this?" And they were just like, "Lab," and like, "Tim, Tim, Tim." And I was like, I didn't even believe it. I was like, "Okay, cool. I, I know I want to do these things," but like I was super mega focused. I used to get in mad trouble just so I could go to the music room. So literally like my whole existence has been like, "I want to write records. I want to write records." And like that's all I'd do. (laughs) I was on a mission to write records. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
And that, what age did-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... that start? 'Cause I know when it, it started to, when you got signed and when you released your debut album and stuff. But I'm trying to understand how long your like mastery process was, from the first time you picked up an instrument or rapped or sung or wrote a lyric.
- LALabrinth
But it's weird because like my brother Josh, um, amazing drummer, Mick Nasty, bad boy drummer, he taught me how to play the bass, taught me how to play the drums. And I would see him doing that so I would just copy my older brother. But because I have so many, then I would go to Jamie's room and Jamie would teach me how to use the MPC. So I would go to his studio and him and his boys would be smoking, drinking, um, and like on a madness. And I, I would, I, he kind of took me under hi- his wing for a bit. And I would like go around with him to like in his world, which was very much more like, it was much more like hip hop, urban, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
So you got this full kind of-
- LALabrinth
Kind of gritty, like more hip hop, like we were listening to Pete Rock, Wu-Tang, all that shit. And then my other brother who was more musical, like a bit more like, like instrument, drums, uh, and I would be around his friends that were musicians, you know? So-
- SBSteven Bartlett
We spoke to someone on your team-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... and they said that w- we could put any instrument in front of you and you'd play it.
- LALabrinth
(laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
I'm just kind of, like I'm, I, now I kind of understand where that came from.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like everything's an instrument to me, honestly. Everything.
- 21:54 – 25:40
ADHD
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
Like this table?
- LALabrinth
Yep.
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
The sound of your voice is a tone.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Like, uh, like I, I, I can just hear music all the time. Like I, it doesn't stop. Um, and I might be, I don't know, might be like I, um, re- I got like diagnosed with ADHD because I thought I may have had it. And, um, and so I went to go check and I was like, when I read about what it's like, I was like, "Oh shit. Um, it makes sense why I'm so..." That's literally, this is all I do. My life is that, it is I, I raise my children, I make music. That's literally been my life.
- SBSteven Bartlett
You got diagnosed with AD- ADHD?
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
It's funny because I was sat here recently.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
With a, with an expert on the topic so it's very front of mind, the topic of ADHD.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Um, and one of the things he said was that, you know, there's been this rise in ADHD in our-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... in, in the world, specifically western countries. I'm only saying specifically because I know the stats where I think it's 30 years ago one in 20 kids had ADHD, now it's one in nine. Um, and his take on it was that ADHD is an early response... Basically when we were young and there was stress in our, in our households, the, the, the child when there's stressful events learns how to basically turn off their attention-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... as a way to protect themselves.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Like switch their attention away from that thing. So, and they've looked at all these studies and really inspired by them where they get 65,000, 65,000 parents and the parents who have the most stress in their lives end up having kids with ADHD.
- LALabrinth
Yeah. Makes sense.
- SBSteven Bartlett
And it's just interesting, so it's just front of mind, I thought, you know, so it goes back to your childhood but...
- LALabrinth
(laughing) Yeah, mad stress- sounds mad stressful, (laughs) so-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah. Yeah.
- LALabrinth
It's not, it's not far off like in terms... But yeah, um, it, even talking about it sometimes sounds silly because everyone thinks they have ADHD. Um, and everyone says it. So I, I was like I, I hate kind of, I'm not, uh, hate's a strong word but like talking about ADHD I don't enjoy trying to victimize myself with it.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
Um, and that's why I checked because I was like I think it's disrespectful for a person with, um, something that affects their mental health or something that affects them, uh, their ability to, to do what they want to do or like to just live a life that is supposed to be, I don't know, what is normal?
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
But yeah, you know, um, and that prohibits them, um, and I think it's disrespectful to be like, "Oh, I'm autistic, I'm this," um, without really like kind of knowing, um, and-
- SBSteven Bartlett
And was it prohibiting your life?
- 25:40 – 30:13
Creativity
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
I wonder if there's a relationship between ADHD and, uh, creativity, 'cause, you know, I hear very similar thing from pretty much all of the artists-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... that I've, I've sat here with about, about, um, what you, what you've just described there. Going back to the, this, this, uh, all these instruments you can play, and all these brothers and sisters that are playing a different variety of, um, instrument and learning different sort of art forms, as it relates to, like, creativity, um, how important do you think it has been for your creativity, and the, the art that you've created in your career, to have all of these... I remember one, one person I spoke to talked about creativity as being like all of these different clouds in your mind, and then sometimes the clouds hit each other-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... and that it's like a new idea.
- LALabrinth
Yeah. Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
But in order to be creative, you have to have as many clouds as possible.
- LALabrinth
I, I feel that. Um, I think that's, in learning, like, it's like, um, being able to create variety in your ability to, um, transmit, um, like, an idea. 'Cause I always look at, I don't, I look at creativity as, um, articulating your soul. And that, that's the true form for me. Like, 'cause you can be creative, but not really tell the truth while you're being creative. Like, you're just like, "Oh, I, I'm making something that I think people will like." Um, and that, there's... And, and you can still be creative while doing that where it's like, "Okay, cool, here's something that I know people are gonna respond to, I'm gonna get a reaction out of you." And then there's the other side where I think, to me, I believe it's art, where you're transmitting and you're articulating the sound or the frequency of your soul to a person. And I feel like every soul has a song. Even, even if it's not in music. Like, every soul, um, has a, uh, a direction or a place it wants to go, and it has purpose. And it's like, I, I can... And I, I always ask artists, I'm like, "What do you hear in you?" Like, not, "What do you hear outside of you?" And, "Oh, um," what's said, "Burna Boy's doing this, and that guy's doing this, and if I mix these together then it maybe makes me." And it's like, no, no, no. What's in you? What do you hear, like, right here, like, just internally? And so, um, for me, I had to do that to, to find, um, what I wanted to say. And, and I'm s- I'm still finding out, I'm still kind of like, um... I, I guess it's learning how to, like, uh, be unafraid to be, like, totally naked, because baring your soul is naked. Like, it's like, it's like, if I do this, someone's gonna be like, "This is shit," and it's gonna hurt. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
If you're in the process of learning to be unafraid-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... was there a time that you were taught to be afraid?
- LALabrinth
Um, my whole life. Ev- like, everything. Um, I'm still afraid now, but, but I can see it, and I think that makes a difference, um, um, in terms of, um, w- whether I choose to be afraid. But before, I had no choice. I was just like, "I don't even know what this is." I just was like, "I'm not enjoying this." I wasn't enjoying my career, so I was like, "I'm not enjoying, why am I not enjoying this?" And then I was like, "Okay, I'm not saying what I wanna say. I'm not saying what, what I feel like saying or what I feel excited about saying." And I feel like my world is being governed by, um, accommodating my periphery. Like, my manager says, "If you do this, this is gonna gain a reaction," and it's kind of like your inner child says, "Oh, I want somebody to say he's cute. I want someone to say he's worthy." And so you run towards th- that energy. Like, and, and I, I was always saying, um, in the music industry, it's like a bunch of kids trying to get a pat on the back. That's what we're all doing. And it's like, if you see it in your ANR or you see it in your peers, and everybody's trying to get that pat on the back, like, "Well done. Good boy," and everybody wants to get the good boy, and so we're all running after good boy. But when you finally realize that I don't give a shit about your good boy, I don't want it, I want, I want a good boy for myself, I wanna, I wanna be like, "You said it," like, "You actually said what was internally going on," and I'd, um, doesn't matter what people, um, uh, say on the other side. Like, it... And getting to that point where you're like, um, "I am comfortable with what I will receive after I've said what I said, um, from my soul," I think for me is, like, true freedom. It's like, "Okay, cool, I'm gonna say what I need to say."
- SBSteven Bartlett
That's a journey, right?
- LALabrinth
Yo.
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
That shit's scary, man.
- SBSteven Bartlett
That's a journey.
- 30:13 – 36:56
Doing things you don't want to do
- SBSteven Bartlett
So you start, you know, you start out in your career-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... you're trying to, you're trying to get on, you're learning the ropes. People are telling you, giving you advice you don't know better.
- LALabrinth
Yep.
- SBSteven Bartlett
So you follow the advice, which-
- LALabrinth
Church boy in, in the music industry. Woo.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Sometimes the advice pays off, so you go-
- LALabrinth
Yeah. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
... "Okay, I'm gonna listen to you more."
- LALabrinth
Yeah. Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
And then at some point in your career-
- LALabrinth
And that's the worst part is when it pays off-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Then you've got, then you're-
- LALabrinth
... 'cause you think it works. You're like, "Well, I, I did everything I didn't wanna do, but it worked, so maybe I should do more of this." And then it-
- SBSteven Bartlett
What are you referring to?
- LALabrinth
I mean, and just, like, records or, like, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
What phase, what part of your career is this though?
- LALabrinth
I think, uh ... Okay, so like with Simon Cowell, and, uh, when I signed to Simon Cowell, I signed to Simon Cowell because my manager at the time was like, "It's a bigger check. You're in a label that, um, isn't gonna know, uh, is- isn't, is gonna prioritize you 'cause you're not like anything on their label." I was like, "Yeah, great idea." But I didn't think about it for myself. I allowed someone else to tell me w- what my next direction is, because, um, I did- I don't think I had the strength at the time to even think about what I wanted for myself, if you get me. Same way I owned a restaurant. M- uh, that was my manager that was like, "You should own a restaurant!" I was like, "Yeah, let's own a restaurant." And then I was like, "I don't know shit about restaurant. I've never cared about a restaurant." (laughs) And, and I only realized that later, but it kinda felt like you're supposed to look like a mogul, and you're supposed to look important, and you're supposed to gather all these things that, that, that start to create, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
What I'm hearing from that-
- LALabrinth
... keeping up appearances. That's what it is. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah. Th- what, what I was hearing from that-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... is like, because you didn't... I was gonna say because you didn't know what you wanted, someone else told you what you wanted-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... but it's more like, part of it sounded like you didn't have the conviction to stand up for what you wanted.
- LALabrinth
No, yeah, that's what it is.
- SBSteven Bartlett
You didn't-
- LALabrinth
It's, I, I didn't ask myself what I wanted. I never did, because I was always accommodating what everyone else wanted. And I still do it now sometimes, but, but I've learned to, to, to be aware of it. And, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Is that because of, is that in part because of like, when we're coming up, we're a little bit desperate just to get on, that we just, we don't have the power yet to say like, "I wanna do it my way," because we're still trying, we still need the check, or because we're, we still-
- LALabrinth
I think one thing I love about the ADHD is I don't think about money the same way most people do. So, like I've, a lot of my peers in the music industry, they're building a business because they can. Like they're, they're going, "Okay, this, yeah, we're gonna do this, and that's gonna come with that." And they have this whole internal plan, and I'm like, my plan is like, well, if I can take a sound out of heaven and put it on a fucking computer, that is mad to me. Like, that, that is like, that literally lights up my whole soul, and I feel so excited. I literally sometimes, when I'm making music, I cry, because I'm like, it hit me that hard, if you get what I mean. And so like, that for me is like, it literally like, I would live for that. I could, that's enough for me. But then, then around that like taking stardust from the clouds or from wherever you want, from the universe, um, this business comes around it, and it says, "We can turn this into money, but you have to do this with it. And then you've got to funnel it, and you can, you can only do this in order to get that." And you're like, "Oh, shit, okay, cool." "Be a star." "What does a star look like?" "Oh, um, be in a car with flipping tinted windows, have an entourage, and go on like you're the shit." "Okay, co- cool, but I don't really know how to do that. I'm kind of really a geek." Like, 'cause that's what I was when I was 16. And then before you know it, you're like, "I don't, none of this shit means anything to me." And I felt like I was being ... That's the time I think when you're talking about this place where I, I don't believe I belong. I was in the music industry, and like I was around, I remember like in Psycho day when, "Who are you going out with?" Like when I was first signed, it was like, "Who you gonna go out with?" And I was like, "What do you mean?" It was like, "Oh, maybe Sherer Lloyd." And I was like, "What?" I was like, "What do you mean?"
- 36:56 – 49:27
When did you feel like something had to change?
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
Hmm. What were the symptoms then for you? When did you realize that something had to change?
- LALabrinth
I was smashing guitars on stage. And I know rock stars do that. I was a church boy, so it was, that was big for me. Um, and I ... One show I was performing, and I was like, "I hate this." But I was saying, "I hate this," but I wasn't saying it in my mind. I was like, uh, I could feel it. I was like, "Why am I ... I'm in this, front of this crowd." This is not even the audience I wanted to be in front of. "What am I doing?" They're loving it, but, but I'm still just like, "What is this?" And, um, my band, when I was talking about accommodating, my band's eating my, um, rider before I get into my room, because I was accommodating everyone to the point where it was like, "Like me, please." Like, "I'll do whatever I can to make sure you're comfortable in my space, even if it means giving you all my space." So my band was eating out my rider. My, some of the people on my, um, team, were taking my, uh, like stuff from my, um, like they would, you know like brands, when brands give you stuff, they would take it and give it to their families. Nothing was given to my family, and my missus had actually noticed this. Um, and I was like, "No, no, no." I was always making excuses for, for everyone that was doing what they were doing.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Where does that come from in you? That people pleasing, trying to, trying to, f-
- LALabrinth
It, it must be my dad. It must, it must be like that my dad ... Because I think I've silenced, uh, my dad's absence in me. So it was just like, "Ah, sperm donor, don't worry. Bleh." And I had to ... I had this thing in my head where it was like, "I don't need this guy." But it's like, um, I think, uh, him not being present is like, "What do I need to be for you to be here?" If you get me.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
And I think, um, that happened. And also, I think the music industry helped create some of that as well, where it was like ... 'Cause before the music industry, I was that guy. I'd throw my durag on.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Dinko.
- LALabrinth
I looked wonky as hell, bro. It was, I, I look back at some of the pictures and I'm dying. I'm like, "Who is this guy?" But, but I was confident enough to walk around London looking like this m- like, hodgepodge guy. And-
- SBSteven Bartlett
So because of-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... because of that-
- LALabrinth
I think the music industry was like, "You need to be this." And I was like, "Whoa. How?"
- SBSteven Bartlett
In order to be accepted.
- LALabrinth
Yes, in order-
- SBSteven Bartlett
And from a young age you'd learnt that like you had ... I guess at some stage you felt not accepted by your father. Is that what you're saying?
- LALabrinth
I think-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Is that where that came from?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, I think there's an element of that. Yeah, yeah. I think that church as well was there, um, where it was like there was a way to behave, there was a way to be-
- SBSteven Bartlett
What was right and wrong.
- LALabrinth
There was a way to be, to, to be loved. If you behave this way, this is what you get, you know, like, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
God loves you.
- LALabrinth
Yeah. God, God loves you if you behave like this. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Interesting.
- LALabrinth
(laughs) And that's not true.
- SBSteven Bartlett
I'm really intrigued by, by the idea of like how, how we become people pleasers. Because ... And it typically, even from, from speaking to Gabor, who has literally wrote a book about this, um, he says the same thing. In those early years when, you know, we, we're seeking the acceptance or validation from a parent, and we're struggling to get it. We have that battle with them of trying to, trying to prove that we're good enough. So that becomes our adult tendency to seek approval and seek, trying to-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... you know, fit into others' expectations. You, you become an artist, that becomes really prevalent in your, in your life, in, in your music, to the point that you're on stage performing music that it sounds like-
- LALabrinth
Uh, what is this? (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
... to a crowd that, um-
- 49:27 – 53:46
Panic attacks
- SBSteven Bartlett
it out. (paper crinkling) I mean, you mentioned panic attacks.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Something Fern told me about from her experience.
- LALabrinth
Lost hair, everything.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Lost hair?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, I had ... Uh, like, I had clumps of hair falling out.... it was mad. Like, it was like, I, I got to that- and my wife was a big, like, part of supporting that, 'cause she, um ... Yeah, she just was like, she could see it all happening, um, and funny enough, I couldn't fight for her at the time as well. Like, um, like, she could see it all happening. She was like, "This is not the way business should be done. It shouldn't be treated this way." And then- and a lot of the people that were around me, uh, made her, like, the monster.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Ah.
- LALabrinth
She became the, I don't-
- SBSteven Bartlett
'Cause she was the one with the boundaries.
- LALabrinth
Yeah. Yeah, yes, that's right. And so, you know, like, um, have you ever seen Spinal Tap? (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
No, I don't think so. (laughs)
- LALabrinth
Okay.
- SBSteven Bartlett
No.
- LALabrinth
But I, I kinda, I call it the Spinal Tap moment, where the missus becomes the manager, and she wasn't managing me. She wasn't even trying to. She hates the music industry, but she wanted to be like, "I wanna protect this guy's sanity," and everyone else around me was like, "We've got a gig for flippin' 100-and-something grand. What do you mean?" Like, "Why is, why are you not gonna do the show?" And it's like, "Yeah, yeah. No, I know you're feeling tired. You're feeling ... You're, ah, you're feeling a bit emotional. Okay, okay. Don't worry, man. Don't worry." Like, "Look at what he's doing. He's doing all this work," and, uh-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah.
- LALabrinth
... comparisons and all this stuff, and so there was a lot of manipulation, and she was seeing it, and I think they kinda didn't like, um, that, so she got, she got intensely, like, kind of, um ...
- SBSteven Bartlett
Protective.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, but also, d- then she became the martyr, like the, she became the ... There was a witch hunt, and it kind of felt like it was directed at her, and I wasn't strong enough to support her, uh, in that time, if you get what I mean. Like, I was, I was still too ...
- SBSteven Bartlett
You m- you were taking the wrong side?
- LALabrinth
I was accommodating. No, I wasn't even taking sides. It was like-
- SBSteven Bartlett
You just went-
- LALabrinth
... "No, no. It's, it's because of this, and ..."
- SBSteven Bartlett
Okay, so you were just-
- LALabrinth
Like ...
- SBSteven Bartlett
Okay.
- LALabrinth
"I'm supposed to have it together, but I don't have it together, but, like, no, I don't think they meant that," and, and I didn't hear the stuff that was going on, but when I heard what was going on, I was like, "Oh, shit. This is crazy." Um ...
- SBSteven Bartlett
Have you ever spoke to her about that?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what built strength in our relationship, was that I said, I said to her, I apologized to her, and I, I think a lot of people don't notice how strong and powerful women are beside people that are in the public eye or, like, in-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm-hmm.
- LALabrinth
... the music industry or entertainment industry. It's like some of them, some of them are, like, of course, wonky or whatever, but a- and are there for the wrong reasons, but the ones that are there for the right reasons sometimes get, um ... They're kind of ... Yeah. They, they don't get treated very well, if you get what I mean, 'cause it's like, you're the guy, you're the person with the guy.
- 53:46 – 55:16
How do you feel about your old music?
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
When you look back on the art that you created in that time-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... in that phase of your life, the music, the hits, Pass Out, Frisky, that, you know, all of that music you created, how do you feel about the music now? So if you walked in here and it was playing, how would you, like, how would you-
- LALabrinth
(laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
How would you feel?
- LALabrinth
Um, I laugh now. I'm like, "Ah, that's vibes. That's fun." Like, it's kinda like it's fun, um, and sometimes I see the brilliance and I'm like ... Like, Pass Out still hits me and I'm like, I can see the energy. I s- I, and it was a moment where I kind of pulled up my sleeves and I was like, "I'm not doing this shit anymore. I'm not gonna fake it. I'm gonna make something I wanna hear." And, and then it paid off. But I have moments like that, and then I get scared again. Like, it's like, "Pass Out, yeah," and it, and it takes me a lot to get there where I'm like, "I'm gonna do something good," and then it's like, everyone's like, "Well done! Do more!" And I'm like, "I'm too scared." (laughs) Yeah, like-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Like, that could happen, where I get too shook. Um, it's just dealing with yourself. It's being, um, uh, being aware of yourself, like what I was saying. To be conscious of yourself, um, or aware of your behavior helps you, um, create peace in your life, like, and, and make choices in a moment that are gonna, um, support you in more ways than one, if you get me. Mm-hmm. More than just finance or achieving things.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, and finance just becomes such a big thing in this industry, even-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Status and finance.
- LALabrinth
... being a father of finance is like, you run, you run for it because you're taught that's the way a man's supposed to be. Um
- 55:16 – 57:34
Leaving the uk
- LALabrinth
...
- SBSteven Bartlett
Why did you go to ... Eventually you go to LA-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... at, what, 24 years old or something?
- LALabrinth
Why'd I go to L- LA, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Was it 24 years old you, you-
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... you left the UK and went to LA?
- LALabrinth
I wanted to go to LA to get away from the UK. Um, not even just get away. I think that was going on internally, like I was like, "I need to do something different." Um ...
- SBSteven Bartlett
But this was after you released your first album with Syco?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, and I was getting ... I was take- it took me, like, e- ages to do a second, and I was like-... I don't know, I was just in my head about it. And so I went to LA to go and just, just be somewhere different, try working with some other writers, and like maybe, uh, kind of get new fresh energy, you know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
"I was getting in my head about it."
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Your- that second album. So you released the first album on Syco.
- LALabrinth
Yeah. They always call it the diff- difficult second album. That's what they call it, the second album-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah.
- LALabrinth
... 'cause it's like you had a moment, and then it's like, "Oh, I gotta do that again." It's like (laughs) that was on accident. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Lewis Capaldi.
- LALabrinth
And it is always on accident. It's like nothing, um... Like, you can paint anything by numbers, but you, you can never... Even in business, you can't recreate exactly the same thing unless it was supposed to happen, you know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
'Cause the world's changed as well.
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah. That's it. Yeah, yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
So it's-
- LALabrinth
So it's like, yeah. Like, we're even in this industry now, like, um, me and my team have been talking about it, but it's like we're in a whole new world. Most records are sold online, like heavily, like it's-
- SBSteven Bartlett
TikTok. (laughs)
- LALabrinth
Like now, (laughs) like TikTok, that's it. That's, that's, that's how you sell records.
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
And so to come into that and go, "How do I find myself amongst this without losing, um, my authenticity?" Um, like, what do you do? Like, you know? Like, and, and so then it kinda goes back to a lot of the things that have happened where it's like, don't be that guy. Don't, don't be that guy and just, like, keep up appearances. Um, find your way. Find a way of saying it in a way that means something to you, you know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
I'm really com- You said... 'Cause I sat with Lewis Capaldi, and he said-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... to me, "I'm shitting it." He's-
- 57:34 – 1:03:36
Being a small fish in a big pond
- SBSteven Bartlett
When, when artists and when people generally make that move, and they, and they make, they make their way out to America-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... they become like a small fish in a big pond-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... in many respects.
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Like, people aren't stopping you in the street like they are out here.
- LALabrinth
(laughs) Oh, that was sick. Just like, I remember going to the Grammys (laughs) , and I was, like, standing next to John Legend, and who else was there? There was m- massive artists, yeah, worldwide success, massive records. And I came to stand in, and my publicist put me in there, and the cameramen just, like, they were taking pic- "John, John, stand here. Oh, um, what's the..." Chrissy. "Chrissy, stand there."
- SBSteven Bartlett
Chrissy Teigen, yeah.
- LALabrinth
And then I came in, and it was just like this.
- SBSteven Bartlett
They dropped the cameras. (laughs)
- LALabrinth
And then the guy was like this. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
I was like, "Oh, shit." (laughs) That was... But do you know what? Uh, l- uh, you know when you're talking about losing, um, or not getting the reaction you wanted? It was the best reaction for me. I loved it. It was like, "They don't give a, give a shit. I can, I can go be that guy again. I can go be the guy that was-"
- SBSteven Bartlett
Expectation gone.
- LALabrinth
That was... Yes, there was no expectation. So I was in this environment where there's no expectation. And then it was like, "Now I can make me. Now I can go and make who I am." And I was in an environment on... And when I'm talking r- racially, the reason why I'm talking racially is because I felt pulled by these two races in this country sonically, and, and then when I was over there, there was none. There was none, like, "Lab, you need to be hood. Go do another this. Lab, we need more pop music. You need to be a bit more, uh, regional. Connect with the radio more. Do more Simon Cowell music." Um, and it was that, there was a pull between me, like... And, and I felt like I don't belong anywhere, like, because I like both, and I find I can see myself in both. But, um, there's always somebody that doesn't like it, and that's what, um, w- kept on affecting me, was that there's always someone that doesn't like what I'm doing. And so I kind of became comfortable with that feeling of being like, "Yeah, someone's not gonna like this." Like, and, and, and-
- SBSteven Bartlett
And if you're a people pleaser, that's gonna make you procrastinate. (laughs)
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah, 100%. But then I'm like... I kind of fell in love with it in LA where it was just like that guy doing that was just like, "I don't know who this guy is. Don't care." And then I had to, like, work my way up, but in a way that was more pure, where it was like, "I'm just gonna do what I love." And I was working with people-
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
... over there that just kind of like... It shed, it pulled away all of the, the kinda mess that, that kind of, uh, created this thing in my head, you know, about creativity.
- SBSteven Bartlett
And that's a, kind of a pro- process of, like, reinvention, right? You're kind of reinventing yourself from, from again because the expectation is gone or?
- LALabrinth
No, not reinventing. Um, realizing.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Realizing, hmm.
- LALabrinth
Because reinvention is trying to get somewhere. Realizing is, n- actually going, "This is who I am." Like, peel away the onion, like, what's underneath? And it's like in that, for me, that's, that's the most important thing in my career, the most important thing in, in my existence is to go, "What's the rawest form of Lab, of my person, of my existence? What's, what's the raw, rawest form of me even without this body? Like, what's the soul? What's, what's my center saying?"
- SBSteven Bartlett
What is that?
- LALabrinth
Um, what do you mean? Like what-
- SBSteven Bartlett
What is the center? Who is Lab? I- What's the purest form? If I peel back all those airs- layers on that onion, what is at the core of Lab? It's a difficult question, one that I'd struggle to answer, so.
- LALabrinth
No, I call it calling your tears.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah.
- LALabrinth
So sometimes, sometimes when I sing (singing) I call this calling your tears. Like, it's like I wanna hear the fucking center of you as well. I give you the center of me, and I wanna hear the center of you. And even bummy notes, whatever the fuck is coming out, it's like can I, can I, can I speak to you n- beyond your, like, "Oh, I have this thing, and I've got money, and I'm thing?" Well, who's the guy?And I'm like, if I can sing and do this to you, and you see you, and you s- and, and we both see, uh, uh, beyond our flesh, beyond the things that bind us on, on, on earth, um, that shit for me, is like, that's what I wanna see. That's, that's what, what I'm always tryin' to get to. Not, not what you were taught when you were five.
- 1:03:36 – 1:06:23
Your new music
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
You got music coming out soon?
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
What was, what's the process been like making this, this new body of work?
- LALabrinth
It was fun.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah?
- LALabrinth
It was fun. It was fast. Um, I, I s- I worked with a band, my band LSD, me and CR and Diplo have a band. And in that, in working with CR, I kinda learned how to let go a bit. And, um, when I went to go write my album, after the long album, the long number two, um, I just kind of was like, "Yeah. Let's just s- do, just do something. Just do it. Let it go. Don't think about it." I did think, I did end up thinking about it lat- a little later on because I've had the album for a while. But, um, um, it was, I just was like, "I enjoy these melodies. I enjoy what I'm doing. I'm gonna leave it there." And, um, uh, alongside euphoria was like, um, it kind of, a lot of these things were teaching me to do that, like come out of that, the pleasing and just go, "What are you hearing? Write what you hear from the sky, and that's it, and just leave it there." So, that's what I did with this record as well.
- SBSteven Bartlett
How much is this record a reflection of how you're feeling and where you are in your mind and your psychology? How much of that is reflected through the music and what you've created?
- LALabrinth
I believe that this record is w- one of the steps towards, um, me being naked. Like I'm, I don't think I'm as naked as I wanna be yet. But, but, um, I, I believe that it's getting me there. And like, even with this album was dedicated to my missus, um, a lot of the songs on the album are dedicated to my missus, because like I was talking about, where she stood up for me and supported me, uh, through the mus- through like my experiences. Um, uh, I kind of wanted to ... I turned our relationship in the music industry into a, um, like two lovers, uh, Bonnie and Clyde riding through the, the cosmos. So, so literally it's like, um, Natural Born Killers in space. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
That's what the whole album was. And that was my like, um, uh, inspiration for the record is that, it's all love songs, but, um, all of the love songs are me taking photos of moments with my, with my wife and things we've been through together. Um, and so I didn't even write, I didn't write in a like, way where it was like, I'm gonna say, "Oh, a couple of weeks ago on Saturday when this happened." (laughs) No, it's not that. It's more-
- SBSteven Bartlett
(laughs)
- LALabrinth
... it's more, um, it's more like, um, loosely based on, on, on like, those moments. And every song has like, it's me, uh, um, amplifying like, uh, like little moments that me and my wife have had.
- 1:06:23 – 1:09:19
Where do you find your inspiration?
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
Where do you get ... Where, where, like sort of physically do you, does mo- does your inspiration show up?
- LALabrinth
Everything is a song, bro.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Like-
- LALabrinth
Everything.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... in here, in the streets, in the, in the gym?
- LALabrinth
This is a song, this is a song, I wait for you. This bottle's sitting here, and if you imagine that everything on earth is alive, this bottle was made just to sit here, to wait to be poured into my, my cup. So, that's a song. I wait for you. I wait for, at your beck and call, whenever you need me, and it's like, I'm, I'm, I'm turning this bottle into a person and I'm like, "Oh, um, um, don't you know how long I've needed to be wanted?" Or, "Don't, don't you know I have a, my own things, or things that I want for myself?" If you get what I mean. So every, every like, little thing like, um, can be like, like turned into, or dr- dra- dramatized into a song, you know? Like, does that make sense? (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
I'll ... It makes sense. I'll wait for you to ...
- LALabrinth
(laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
... and I'll nutritionally complete you. (laughs)
- LALabrinth
Yeah. (laughs) No, but it's like, I'll complete you.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah.
- LALabrinth
I'll, I'll, like I'm the, I- I'm, I'm ... It's like I'm, I'll be your servant. It's like, um, um, but like, "W- when is my moment?" Like, oh, you can just find things in it. Like there's just one thing sitting there and like, start to, uh, peel the onion of, "Okay, what would it feel like if I just had to sit there? Like I was created and I just had to sit there to replenish somebody's..."... health, like-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Have you always thought like that? 'Cause that's-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... quite an abstract way to think, like, the, the s- the metaphor or the symbolism of what-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
... that bottle is doing there. A lot of people would say, "Oh, that's a, a, you know, a drink."
- LALabrinth
(laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
Yeah.
- LALabrinth
Um, yeah, that's everything, bro. (laughs)
- SBSteven Bartlett
And have you cultivated yourself to think in such a way over time, where you've leant into that? Or is that something that you've just always had as a-
- LALabrinth
No, that's, that's it, that's it for me. Like, with everything, it's like... 'Cause I guess, um, like you were saying, when, with growing up, um, you're going, "How do people see the world?" And you try to see the world through other people's eyes, especially with, when you grow up with, like, either traumas or, like, an intense home, you learn to kind of observe a lot. And so, like, in observation, you go into, like, um-
- SBSteven Bartlett
Storytelling, almost.
- LALabrinth
Bro, like, it's like layers and layers of storytelling, like. Um, yeah, so I just see every, every song. Even sounds, for me, have colors. Sounds, for me, have pictures. Um, so I always have an idea. Usually what scares the idea away is people pleasing, honestly. Like, I know, I, I know what my idea is, but it's like learning how to, in a business, um, especially that we go from writing in our bedrooms to becoming CEOs of companies without knowing it. Um, you have to learn how to run your business and turn, like, get your business to articulate what you want to say without being frightened of judgment.
- 1:09:19 – 1:10:55
Advice for younger lab
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
I'm the lad that just got signed to Syco.
- LALabrinth
Okay.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Day one of Syco, I get to meet you, here now, and I get to come and ask you for advice. I'm, I'm you, on that day that you sign with Syco. What advice do you give me?
- LALabrinth
Just live your life, whatever it's supposed to be. I, I don't, I wouldn't take back anything that's happened, honestly. Like, because, um, I believe that, um, everything happens to build you, and I wouldn't have learnt the things I've learned in order to become who I am today. So, all my challenges are turning me into who I'm supposed to be, so.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Do you think if you'd told me-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
Do you think if you'd given me advice-
- LALabrinth
Yeah.
- SBSteven Bartlett
So, I'm you at, you know, when you signed that deal with Syco. Do you think if you'd given me the advice, I would've listened?
- LALabrinth
No. Uh, uh, no, no, no. I, I wouldn't have listened. To me, I would've been like, I'd be like, "Yeah, man, people love my music, let's go." Like, uh, 'cause you just don't know then, it- you don't know what you're gonna experience. Um, yeah, so I would, I would, I would say go and experience what you need to experience, 'cause it, like, you're gonna head to your, to your north in whatever way you can. And, and some people don't ever find their north, because they don't learn to go, "Okay, um, let me take a look at myself." You know? Like, I think that's the, the l-... My dad did that, where he just, he wasn't able to be vulnerable enough to go, "Okay, maybe this, or may- uh, like, could I change this? Or actually, I'm not happy here." You know?
- SBSteven Bartlett
Mm.
- LALabrinth
Um, um, and so I feel like if you can do that in your life, um, I don't think anything's wrong with it. I think, um, you'll, you'll be able to find your north, like, by, by being able to observe yourself.
- 1:10:55 – 1:26:41
Goals now
- LALabrinth
- SBSteven Bartlett
What are your goals now? I imagine that-
- LALabrinth
To make the cosmic opera. << Ba da da da >> Okay, bro, it's mad.
- SBSteven Bartlett
No, tell me. That's your goal. I wanna hear it. What's your-
- LALabrinth
Oh, yeah, yeah, I do. I wanna make an opera.
- SBSteven Bartlett
You wanna make an opera?
- LALabrinth
Yeah, yeah. I wanna write an opera. I can hear the sounds, I can hear how it looks, feels, um, and, um, yeah, I just, I wanna, I wanna, like, make, um... Like, uh, I wanna do things with choirs that nobody's done. I can hear all these things that I'm like, "Nobody's done this. I'm gonna go do it." Like, literally, I'm there.
Episode duration: 1:31:17
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