The Poop Episode

1. 0:00 – 0:01

   Intro

   1. BEDr. Becky0:00

      [instrumental music]

2. 0:01 – 0:30

   Why talk about poop: de-stigmatizing a universal body function

   1. BEDr. Becky0:01

      I'm Dr. Becky, and this is Good Inside. I'm a clinical psychologist, I'm a mom of three, and I'm on a mission to rethink the way we raise our children. So while everybody poops, we don't always like talking about it, unless it's somebody else's poop, like your kids. Well, my guest today is going to help us change all of that. Abby Meyers is a physician assistant at the Mayo Clinic in the gastroenterology and hepatology department. I'll let her introduce herself.

3. 0:30 – 2:09

   Abby’s personal medical story and why it shaped her GI career

   1. SPSpeaker0:30

      My name is Abby Meyers, and I am a wife and a mother of twin boys who are almost 5 years old. Uh, they are the love of my life, and after a long bout with infertility, uh, I'm so happy that they are here. I am a physician assistant, and I have been in the medical field, combined gastroenterology, but also colorectal surgery, for the past 11 years. Um, and that was spurred by an interest. Uh, as a young child, I was sick with ulcerative colitis and, um, needed to undergo some pretty significant surgery by the eighth grade, and I kind of noticed that healthcare professionals were telling me, "Oh, I know how you feel, I know how you feel." And then when I'd ask them, "Oh, you have an ileostomy?" They would say, "Oh, no, no, no. I don't, I don't have that, but I know how you feel." So I told my mother, "I don't want, I don't want to be a teacher anymore. I want to go into healthcare, and I promise I will never say that to anybody unless I actually know how they feel." And so that's kind of what spurred my interest in GI and colorectal surgery, and from there, it's just kind of, that's been my passion, and I've kind of stuck in that area for the past 11 years.

   2. BEDr. Becky1:39

      Wow. Thank you for, for sharing that. It is so amazing to find a career that is, like, in line with your experience and passion. It's amazing when it's all so aligned. So there's so many different things we could talk about, and I feel like, I was about to say the thing we're gonna start with, but maybe it will just be the thing we talk about for the whole time, is, is poop.

   3. SPSpeaker2:03

      My favorite topic. [laughs]

   4. BEDr. Becky2:04

      Okay. So you go first then. Like, talk to me about poop. Just you, you start. You're the expert.

4. 2:09 – 3:38

   Modeling bathroom behavior early: building a no-shame foundation

   1. SPSpeaker2:09

      Sure. Well, I am a mom and a physician assistant [laughs] in the area of poop, uh, but I'm not a pediatrician, and I'm not a potty training expert by any means. But I have seen in my career healthy poops and unhealthy poops and healthy ways of evacuating our poop and unhealthy ways of evacuating our poop, and how significantly incomplete evacuation or learned behaviors over many years, um, have then perpetuated evacuation disorders, and how that disrupts one's life completely. And so I, I knew early on, even before we had children, that I was gonna come at this potty training thing, um, with open curiosity about poop and open dialogue in our home and sharing body mechanics and why we do it and how we do it and what makes poop. The moment that my kids could move, I started saying to them, "Ah, Mommy's got that poopy feeling or pee-pee feeling. I gotta go to the potty." And so w- we would say, "Drop everything," and they would crawl and follow me to the bathroom. Um, and they would sit by the bathroom and, you know, even to this day, I really don't have, you know, my own privacy [laughs] in the bathroom, but that's okay. I can get all worked out that, you know, we're just normalizing that this is a bodily function that everybody has. There's nothing special about it. There, you know, there's no pressure about it. Everybody does it. And so that's kind of where I started with the children, as we've got that potty feeling, we've gotta go now.

5. 3:38 – 5:01

   Dr. Becky’s shame framework: connection as the antidote

   1. BEDr. Becky3:38

      You know, when you were talking about that, Abby, one of the things I think a lot about is shame in general, and how the antidote to shame in my mind is connection, right? So anything that we've stored with shame, we've stored in a state of aloneness, right? And as humans who are oriented by attachment, um, things that we learned we had to be alone with were almost learned as, oh, well, this is inherently non-conducive with attachment, so it must be bad. And it, it's interesting. I haven't really thought about this extension until you were talking about it, but as you were modeling that pee-pee feeling, that poopy feeling, and then your kids learn that, oh, like, I can be connected to my mom while she's pooping. What you're doing is something so much more than saying, "I want my kids to be in the bathroom while I poop." What you're saying really is you're laying the groundwork for poop isn't shameful. Poop isn't bad. Poop is part of the normal human experience, the same way you would be with me when I'm, I don't know, happy and excited or when I'm in a moment of sadness. Like, we can be together in this. And, and I think a lot of us fast-forward, right? Like, like I'm pretty sure when your twins are 28, you're not gonna be like, "Mommy has that poopy feeling," and they're gonna be like, "Oh, I'm gonna follow Mommy to the bathroom."

   2. SPSpeaker4:53

      [laughs]

   3. BEDr. Becky4:53

      Like, I have a feeling that's not the way it's gonna go. But you've set this foundation for a total absence of shame.

6. 5:01 – 7:14

   Real life normalization: public poop talk and believing kids’ signals

   1. SPSpeaker5:01

      Absolutely, and we saw this actually the other weekend. We went, we went out to dinner, and in the middle, there's not a lot of people at the restaurant. I have four-year-olds. We have to go early, right?

   2. BEDr. Becky5:09

      Right.

   3. SPSpeaker5:09

      [laughs] So when we're sitting at the restaurant, there are some other people there, and all of a sudden, one of my twins says, " [gasps] " really loudly, of course, "I need to poop so bad." And I said, "All right. Let's go." And so we just stand up, and that's the other thing, you know. When, when our kids say that they have the poopy feeling or have a pee-pee feeling, we just believe them. Yeah, do we have to go to the bathroom 1,000 times? Do we know that they want to just look at what this bathroom looks like in this new place? Yes. Is it disgusting when it's a port-a-potty in a park that we've never been in? Probably. But we believe them every time. And so I take him into the bathroom. He sits down on the toilet, and I always say, "Do you need privacy, or are you fine?" And sometimes he'll want privacy, and sometimes he won't. And then he'll say, "Do you need to go poop too?" And I have to remind myself when other, you know, women are in the bathroom, that it's okay for me to say loud and proud, "Yes, I do have to poop right now." But I think that's still hard, and that's a, you know... And when we talk about the shame and, you know, having a bowel illness as a child, you know, I was embarrassed to go to the bathroom. I was embarrassed what that meant, and I think I wanna make sure that my children are not embarrassed, and they're actually teaching me to become more comfortable with pooping in public or talking about pooping in public.

   4. BEDr. Becky6:22

      It's so obvious, but such a big shift. A- and I think about my own early years, and even now, right? As someone who I consider myself a, a pretty confident person, but yeah, like, poops and farts, it's like, "Oh, no, no, that wasn't me. Nope, mm-mm." Right? Like, it, it is literally a part of being a healthy human being. Everyone poops. Everyone farts. Everyone has diarrhea. Like, everyone has been constipated, right? And you're right, the things we can w- learn from our kids, right? It's almost like when your kid says in a restaurant, "I have to poop," it's almost like we should look around the restaurant and just know internally, instead of that, "Oh, so embarrassing," say to yourself, "I just did all of these human beings a favor. I just de-shamed their poop for them. You're welcome, you're welcome. You could pay me $5. You could pay me $5 for that." Right? Like-

   5. SPSpeaker7:11

      [laughs]

   6. BEDr. Becky7:11

      ... it is such a gift to other adults.

7. 7:14 – 8:53

   Poop as information: observing shape, hydration, movement, and diet

   1. SPSpeaker7:14

      Yes. So when you talk about, you know, everybody having poops, we live on two acres, so we often go outside, and we look at, you know, the poop in the yard, and animals' poop, and we talk about, like, the different shapes of poop and the different types of poop that we see. And then, you know, they talk about their own poop as well. Um, and now that I don't have control over, you know, seeing what's in their diaper and things like that, oh, do they need more hydration? Do they need, you know, more movement? Those things, I do talk to them about, you know, take a look at your poop. Your poop tells us a story. Your poop tells us what we have been eating. Your poop tells us how your body is feeling. Your poop tells us if you're sick or if you need more water. And so there are times that my kids will, um, [laughs] even last night one of them came out to me and said, "You know, Mom, I had little poop that looks like the deer poop, and I think I probably need to drink a little more water." You're exactly right. You do need to drink a little bit more water, and let's move our bodies. So, you know, first thing he woke up this morning, "I gotta drink water, Mom." Yep, you do. And so we, we really talk about why does poop happen, why is it different per animals based upon what we're eating, and then I translate that into human beings, that we all eat different things. We all have different practices of hydration and movement, and that all leads to different types of bowel movements.

   2. BEDr. Becky8:24

      Okay, so now, uh, now I feel like I, I need to learn a lot of things from you. So can you go over some of the things you just named and help me learn, help all of us here learn, like, what could I be seeing in a poop that's a sign of, y- you know, not just naming it unhealthy poop, but as a sign of some of the things y- you named. More movement is needed, or maybe I'm sick, or maybe I need more of a certain nutrient. Can you, can you teach us about, you know, what to notice and what it might mean?

8. 8:53 – 9:23

   Red flags, boundaries, and consent: blood in stool and who can look

   1. SPSpeaker8:53

      Sure. So I think first we clear out the red flags that, you know, we tell ... I talk to my kids, especially as a child with ulcerative colitis, I didn't tell my mom that I was seeing blood in my poop. I didn't understand. And so n- I tell my children, "If you see blood in your poop, we can't flush that down. Mom or Dad need to see that." Then also safety here, we also tell them that nobody else should really be looking at their poop or watching them poop, that only Mom and Dad, you know, can be there for that, or a doctor if Mom and Dad say it's okay. So, okay, now that we got those two big ones

9. 9:23 – 10:39

   The Bristol Stool Scale: what “healthy” poop looks like

   1. SPSpeaker9:23

      out of there [laughs] , um, what we want or what we strive for is one to two kind of soft formed stools. That's called a Bristol type four [laughs] . Kind of snake-like stools, maybe once a day up to, you know, every even, every three days, depending upon people's diet and, you know, how much they're moving, whether they are taking different medicines or, you know, maybe they have underlying medical conditions that cause them to be a little bit more constipated.

   2. BEDr. Becky9:51

      I, I like to know the names of things. Bristol four?

   3. SPSpeaker9:53

      Yeah. Bristol is the stool scale, and it goes one to seven. And one are gonna be those, like, hard pebble stools.

   4. BEDr. Becky10:01

      Okay.

   5. SPSpeaker10:01

      Kind of like a rabbit or a deer poop.

   6. BEDr. Becky10:04

      Mm-hmm.

   7. SPSpeaker10:05

      Um, seven is gonna be pure liquid-

   8. BEDr. Becky10:07

      Mm

   9. SPSpeaker10:07

      ... maybe some, like, sandy sediment in the bottom.

   10. BEDr. Becky10:10

       So this is not a higher is better-

   11. SPSpeaker10:13

       No

   12. BEDr. Becky10:13

       ... situation.

   13. SPSpeaker10:14

       This is not. [laughs]

   14. BEDr. Becky10:14

       This is like you wanna be perfectly average. [laughs]

   15. SPSpeaker10:16

       This is like a Goldilocks: not too hard, not too soft.

   16. BEDr. Becky10:19

       Amazing.

   17. SPSpeaker10:20

       Somewhere just right.

   18. BEDr. Becky10:21

       Got it.

   19. SPSpeaker10:22

       [laughs] And, but knowing that we can all exist within that spectrum, and it can just be a part of maybe-

   20. BEDr. Becky10:28

       Mm

   21. SPSpeaker10:28

       ... we had an entire, you know, carton of blueberries.

   22. BEDr. Becky10:32

       Mm.

   23. SPSpeaker10:32

       Yeah, you're gonna have some diarrhea from that. [laughs] Maybe that's gonna be a looser stool. So we strive for kind of right in that middle there-

10. 10:39 – 12:14

    Constipation vs diarrhea basics: fiber + water, sugar, and hydration watch-outs

    1. BEDr. Becky10:39

       Okay

    2. SPSpeaker10:39

       ... and easy to pass. And so if somebody is having harder to pass stools, maybe those little pebbles, um, they look kinda dry. So number two on the Bristol sterile-

    3. BEDr. Becky10:49

       Mm

    4. SPSpeaker10:49

       ... scale is like a dry sausage looking. They always have equated to food. Um, my kids get that, so we do kinda talk about that in our home. But, um, when it's a little bit more dry or a little bit harder balls of stool, we encourage, um, my, in my home and in my patients, I encourage them to increase their fiber. Now, kids aren't gonna know what fiber is, um, so we do that as parents. We increase maybe some of the fruits and vegetables that they're drinking. But fiber's no good if we're not pairing that with some water too. So making sure, oh, has my kid been outside running a lot and sweating playing sports? Maybe they need more water.

    5. BEDr. Becky11:23

       Wait, 'cause I, I don't know that. So fiber, if I'm just giving my kids a lot of fiber, but I'm not watching their hydration, like I'm not getting the most from my intervention.

    6. SPSpeaker11:33

       You're not.

    7. BEDr. Becky11:33

       Okay.

    8. SPSpeaker11:33

       No. Making sure that hydration is helping, so the fiber helps to bulk, but the l- the water helps us to not make it hard.

    9. BEDr. Becky11:41

       Oh. Okay. Great.

    10. SPSpeaker11:43

        Now, if we're swinging the other direction in liquidity, we have to ma- see is, my kid's sick. Are we able to maintain hydration here? You know, those are gonna be the worrisome features. Are they urinating enough? Does, do their lips look chapped? Uh, especially in our younger babies, um, and potty training, that they might not be able to tell us they're thirsty. So that could tell us that they might be sick, or did they just eat a, an entire carton of blueberries? Do they have a bunch of juice? So sugar promotes more liquid type stools because, um, that f- the water kind of follows with the sugar.

11. 12:14 – 13:41

    Poop color and floating stool: what matters and what usually doesn’t

    1. BEDr. Becky12:14

       Huh. Okay, this is all so helpful. A couple other questions. Color. Color.

    2. SPSpeaker12:18

       Yeah.

    3. BEDr. Becky12:19

       Tell me about that.

    4. SPSpeaker12:20

       Okay. So everyone want, wants to talk about color of their poop. I don't get too excited as a-

    5. BEDr. Becky12:24

       Oh

    6. SPSpeaker12:24

       ... medical professional about the color, um, so much. Red is an important color, you know, blood. If it's kind of pale, I might think about, you know, hydration component of it. If it's a little bit more like dark black green kind of looking, that makes me think a little bit more about bile and maybe they're having like a rapid transit. Maybe they're not feeling very good. You can imagine those times when you've been diarrhea sick and you are having lots of stool, but then coming after that might be that yellowy bile, greenish, dark green looking stools. That can usually be more of an indicator that you're having like a sickness, an illness there.

    7. BEDr. Becky12:56

       Okay, what about those floaters?

    8. SPSpeaker12:59

       [laughs] Yeah. That's normal too.

    9. BEDr. Becky13:01

       Oh.

    10. SPSpeaker13:01

        That's just depending upon what we're eating and what we're drinking, the fat content of the stool, and so, um, you're gonna notice that it changes. And usually what I kind of counsel with my patients and when I look at with my children and even myself is, you know, is this a sustained change that's lasted more than like three, four days? And if so, maybe it is something that I should bring up to somebody if it doesn't seem quite right. So we always talk about our kids, you know, trusting like intuitive eating and, you know, do you got that poopy pee pee feeling. But also, if as a parent we're worried about something and it's prolonged more than just a couple of days, I think it's still worth bringing it up. And maybe you're told, "Normal, let's just watch it." Okay, great. But you spoke up for yourself, so we have to trust ourselves too as parents.

12. 13:41 – 15:20

    Voicemail: potty trained for pee, but demands a diaper to poop

    1. BEDr. Becky13:41

       Okay. I want to bring in a voicemail I got-

    2. SPSpeaker13:44

       Okay

    3. BEDr. Becky13:45

       ... that I would love to listen to together because I feel like together we could brainstorm some helpful ideas. So let's play it.

    4. SPSpeaker13:53

       Hi. So I have a question that I really have not been able to get an answer about. Um, my son just turned three, and he potty trained at the end of April. He hardly has any accidents. He hasn't had accidents for months, um, and he only had a couple of pee accidents at the beginning. Uh, he has refused to poop in the potty and demands to have a diaper. At first we would, you know, encourage him to go in the potty, and he did a couple of times when he was first learning, and then after that, he started holding his poop in and he just will not go unless we put a diaper on him. We were worried about his health and his digestive system, and he was clearly in a lot of pain, so we let him go in the diaper, but he still will not go in the potty. And I'm just wondering, is there something else we should try to do, or will he come along to this, come around to it on his own? Is there a timeline we should be sticking to? He is going to preschool. He just started preschool, and they don't do any diapers there, so we've told him that he, if he has to poop when he goes there, he needs to go in the potty or wait until he gets home. And, um, I just don't know what to do, so thanks.

    5. BEDr. Becky15:18

       What does this bring up for you, Abby?

13. 15:20 – 18:38

    Comfort, pressure, and the ‘fast-forward error’: calming the parent nervous system

    1. SPSpeaker15:20

       Everybody likes to poop at home.

    2. BEDr. Becky15:22

       Wait. Just say that again.

    3. SPSpeaker15:24

       Everybody likes to poop at home. We all just like to poop where we're comfortable.

    4. BEDr. Becky15:28

       I really mean this. I feel like there's something in my body that's tearing up as you're saying that. Like, just so normalizing. Like wait, we all like to poop where we're comfortable, and even more generally, we're all more comfortable feeling vulnerable and exposed when we're, you know, in a place that feels really safe and known to us. And pooping is like you're naked, you're like sitting down, you're, you know, you're working through something maybe, right? So I, I love that framework. Okay, so let's, let's normalize that. Like yes, it's, it's really normal to wanna poop in a way that is most comfortable and known to you. And I think as parents we're often like, "Okay, well, what's after that?" And there is after that, but sometimes it's okay to just pause and be like, "Wait, that, that shifted my body. That shifts how I feel. That shifts my urgency. That shifts the question of what timeline." It, it also makes me just align with my kid instead of being against them, right? Okay, so what else? So I think that's a great way to start.

    5. SPSpeaker16:27

       So I think as adults and as parents we understand that there are these, like, societal pr- pressures that are in place. There is control here. We have to have our kid potty-trained before they go to preschool. They can't be in this classroom if they aren't potty-trained. So we are taking on that pressure, and then we're placing it on our children whether we feel like we are or we aren't. And so this was something that I really worried about putting my own kids into preschool too. Like, there are gonna be accidents. There are gonna be things that happen, whether it's poop-holding or pee. It's a new environment. We all prefer going to the bathroom at home. [laughs] So I think first is sitting with that that, that we feel that pressure, and it's not right. It's n- schools, you know, I understand they can't, they can't be doing that for a lot of children of helping them through diapers and things like that. It's a, it's a rite of passage, but this isn't gonna last forever. He, when you use the example of my kids being 28 coming in the bathroom with me, no, that's not gonna happen. And, and her son is not going to be 28 years old and only pooping in a diaper either.

    6. BEDr. Becky17:26

       I just want, I just wanna name that because we all do this as parents so much that I, I've called it the fast-forward error, right? My kid's hitting and I see them in jail. My kid's not pooping, and like, it's for some reason I have an image of them at like age 30 in a diaper and we fast-forward our struggle today to the same struggle, but with our kid older in higher stakes. And then we take all of that anxiety of all those years in the future, and we bring it back to today, and then we intervene today based on that anxiety, based on that fear, as opposed to based on whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, okay. What is today's date? How old is my kid right now? What's going on for my kid, and what do they need today? Because the best thing I can do, even for my kid in the future, is helping them With what they need today. And like saying hi to that fear and that fast-forward thought, ooh, let me come back, and even saying out loud what day it is, is like a good reminder for your body, it is not 2049. No, no, no. Okay. Let me come back and remind my body, I'm gonna figure this out. I have faith in myself and my kid. It, it's, it's hugely anxiety relieving.

14. 18:38 – 22:10

    Troubleshooting diaper-pooping: pain, positioning, privacy, and autonomy

    1. SPSpeaker18:38

       I think the other piece of this too is that, you know, with that control, like I mentioned, I even struggle with that, not having control over watching my kids, you know, how much pee did they have? Did they really empty their bladder? Did they really empty their bowels fully and completely? I have friends who have this poop holding that we call it, and we're not in control of this, and our kids are. This can be triggering, it can be, uh, stressful, and we don't know, do we just give them a diaper 'cause we know that they're not going to feel comfortable if they don't get their poop out, or are we perpetuating the problem? So one of the things that I had done and what I had encouraged some of my friends to do is, first of all, make sure there's no underlying medical issues, that there's like an outlet problem in the, in the anus, or, you know, that the stools are too hard and maybe they hurt them coming out, and so they feel more comfortable in their diaper. Also, think about what kids, their body position is when they are hiding behind the couch or in the curtains kind of squatting down, going in their diaper. That body position is entirely different than sitting on a potty. And so when we talk to our children about, you know, sitting on the potty, what makes you comfortable, you know, what's comfortable with the diaper here. Also, maybe is it because kids a lot of time will go hide when they're pooping in their diaper. Is it that they want privacy in the bathroom? Is it kind of scary? Everybody's staring at them to go poop, and maybe that's not what they want either. [laughs] So kind of having a conversation, does it hurt when it's coming out? What is the, you know, at, at this age when we're potty training, there is, there is some conversation that our kids can tell us, you know, why they prefer a diaper versus the potty, and it might be the size of the potty. It might be the body positioning. It might be that they're, it, it hurts. And so we can, we can intervene in different ways based upon what our kid is telling us there.

    2. BEDr. Becky20:19

       I really mean this, so, so helpful. And, you know, I think kids have very few opportunities to really say, "I am in full control. Full control." And that's okay. We don't want them to be in full control of deciding if they go to school, right? They, they don't do those things. But what they can fully be in control of is what goes into their body for food and what goes out of their body with pee and poop. And they are then very kind of understandably resistant to anybody impinging on those few areas that they actually feel really independent. And then it becomes almost an identity battle, that the more are my, the more I feel my parents' anxiety about my poop or control, or you have to poop before you do this. I know you're able to do it. Why are you being so difficult, right? When they add control and shame, my body literally from a psychological point of view tenses up. It's the opposite of the movement and release we need. But also i- it's almost like a kid would have to resist more as a way of saying, "Now this is the only way I can define being my own person, is, is actually by keeping all of this in," right? And we can't win that identity battle when it becomes this like existential crisis of independence. So I'm wondering how we end this conversation, Abby, because I really, like, I feel like we could talk forever, and like I am gonna follow up with you. I have so many other things, um, I wanna say. Um, anything last on, on your mind? Anything you want to share with parents? Anything you wanna get off your chest about poop? Any poop songs you, you know, I don't know, have in your repertoire to sing? Anything we, anything that you think would be a good, a good pause for now?

    3. SPSpeaker22:00

       I don't have any poop songs.

    4. BEDr. Becky22:01

       Oh, God.

    5. SPSpeaker22:01

       I wish I did. I do sing a lot of songs to my children, but I never made up a poop one.

    6. BEDr. Becky22:06

       Ooh.

    7. SPSpeaker22:06

       Um, you've sparked my creativity now.

    8. BEDr. Becky22:08

       There you go.

    9. SPSpeaker22:08

       I might have to come up with one.

    10. BEDr. Becky22:09

        [laughs]

15. 22:10 – 23:57

    A simple technique: deep belly breaths, short sits, and honoring the urge

    1. SPSpeaker22:10

       Um, one thing I do wanna mention is if your kid is sitting on the potty and they have that poopy feeling but no poop is coming out, I ha- get this a lot from my kids, "Mom, no poop is coming out of my body, but I have that feeling," I really encourage them, take three big breaths. Um, and I show them how we fill up our belly with it, and adults can do this too. Three big breaths where we fill up our abdomen, and if nothing comes, it's time to get off the toilet until we have that poopy feeling again. And a lot of times my kids will start yelling from the bathroom, "It's working." And of course it is, because we need to fill up that abdominal, abdominal cavity with some pressure to help our, our muscles kind of relax and evacuate from below. It's not actually bearing down and pushing. It's, uh, this filling of our abdominal cavity. And so that's a big thing is deep breaths and just allowing, honoring our urge to defecate, that's important, and then allowing it to happen, so no more than three to five minutes on the toilet maximum.

    2. BEDr. Becky23:08

       This, uh, this is another great way to end. It, like, does so many things. It really helps, uh, the process, the evacuation process, and it kind of is a signal to your body, like, I'm safe. I will be trying that later today, so, and I will be thinking of you, you know-

    3. SPSpeaker23:21

       Thank you

    4. BEDr. Becky23:22

       ... in that moment. I will. Um, this has been so helpful, so de-shaming, so immediately usable, and I wanna thank you for not only, you know, talking about a topic that feels almost still taboo in so many homes, and talking about it in a way that really makes sense and is so actionable. So thank you so much.

    5. SPSpeaker23:44

       Thank you for having me talk about something that I'm so passionate about, and I love to talk about poop. But just a reminder, everybody does it, and we're all on the same playing field. There's nothing exciting about it. Everybody does it.

16. 23:57 – 26:08

    Closing action step: talk about poop today + show notes and credits

    1. BEDr. Becky23:57

       So let's end today with one simple action item that we can all do in our homes with our kids. Talk about poop with your child today. Not in the context of, do they need to poop, or I know you have to go poop, but just in the context of de-shaming the poop process. It can be simple and short, just saying to your kid, "Hey, you know what? Everyone poops. You know what? We talk a lot sometimes about your poop. That's going on in your body, and I trust you to figure that out. You should know that I poop too. I poop, you poop, everyone poops." Let's de-shame poop together in these small ways. [outro music] Thanks for listening. To share a story or ask me a question, go to goodinside.com/podcast. You could also write me at podcast@goodinside.com. Parenting is the hardest and most important job in the world, and parents deserve resources and support so they feel empowered, confident, and connected. I'm so excited to share Good Inside Membership, the first platform that brings together content and experts you trust with a global community of like-valued parents. It's totally game-changing. Good Inside with Dr. Becky is produced by Jesse Baker and Eric Nuzum at Magnificent Noise. Our production staff includes Sabrina Farhi, Julia Natt, and Kristin Mueller. I would also like to thank Erica Belsky, Mary Panico, Jill Cromwell Wang, Ashley Valenzuela, and the rest of the Good Inside team. And one last thing before I let you go. Let's end by placing our hands on our hearts and reminding ourselves, even as I struggle and even as I have a hard time on the outside, I remain good inside. [outro music]

Episode duration: 26:14