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Terry Real on Huberman Lab: Why stoicism damages intimacy

Stoicism trains men to suppress feelings until relationships break; Real covers relational skills, vulnerability, and how to rebuild intimacy through conflict.

Terry RealguestAndrew Hubermanhost
Dec 29, 20252h 50mWatch on YouTube ↗

CHAPTERS

  1. 0:00 – 2:53

    Terry Real

  2. 2:53 – 7:39

    Men & Masculinity, Political vs Psychological Patriarchy, Feminism

  3. 7:39 – 10:50

    Stoicism, Vulnerability, Traditional Masculinity, Emotions

  4. 10:50 – 13:14

    Sponsors: BetterHelp & David

  5. 13:14 – 21:54

    Masculinity Across Decades, Giving; Gratification vs Relational Joy

  6. 21:54 – 31:17

    Healthy Emotional Expression, Connection & Vulnerability; Self-Esteem

  7. 31:17 – 35:10

    Feeling Emotions, Tools: Asking For Help; Fights & “What Do You Need?”

  8. 35:10 – 40:47

    Self-Esteem & Relationship Accountability; Criticism, Redefining Strength

  9. 40:47 – 42:32

    Sponsor: AG1

  10. 42:32 – 50:21

    Healthy Criticism, Tool: Women & Articulating Needs

  11. 50:21 – 58:11

    Childlike Behavior, Wise Adult & Trauma, Tool: Relational Mindfulness

  12. 58:11 – 1:08:14

    Tool: Responsible Distance Taking; Self-Interest; Relationship “Biosphere”

  13. 1:08:14 – 1:17:51

    Alcohol, Men & Friends, Loneliness, Men’s Retreat

  14. 1:17:51 – 1:25:39

    Fraternities, Men’s Groups, Tool: Relationship vs Individual Support

  15. 1:25:39 – 1:27:27

    Sponsor: Function

  16. 1:27:27 – 1:36:11

    Lack of Male Friends, Hiking, Community, Teaching Young Men

  17. 1:36:11 – 1:40:40

    Cannabis, Alcohol, Young Men & Purpose, Flexibility & Manliness

  18. 1:40:40 – 1:45:01

    Work, Life Purpose & Men; Skillful Warriors

  19. 1:45:01 – 1:53:24

    Absent Fathers; Early Childhood & Proper Nurturing; Caretaking

  20. 1:53:24 – 1:54:47

    Sponsor: Waking Up

  21. 1:54:47 – 1:59:02

    Women & Speaking Relationally, Objectivity Battle

  22. 1:59:02 – 2:08:04

    Addiction & Disconnection, 12-Step Meetings & Fellowship

  23. 2:08:04 – 2:11:57

    Pornography, Internet, Intensity vs Intimacy; Optimization

  24. 2:11:57 – 2:22:29

    Tool: Families & Hanging Out; Relational Joy; Relational Recovery

  25. 2:22:29 – 2:28:21

    Giving Criticism, Tools: Make Requests; Feedback Wheel

  26. 2:28:21 – 2:34:17

    Gratitude, Aging; Skillful Fighting in Relationship & Repair

  27. 2:34:17 – 2:44:00

    Men & Self-Esteem, Mentors, Tool: Inner Dialogue without Harshness

  28. 2:44:00 – 2:48:00

    Y Chromosome, Wholeness

  29. 2:48:00 – 2:50:30

    Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Sponsors, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter

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