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Science of Attraction, Compatibility & Romance | Dr. Paul Eastwick

Dr. Paul Eastwick, PhD, is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and a leading expert on the modern science of mate selection in humans. We discuss what people actually look for in a partner, including surprising findings about age preferences, finances, and physical attractiveness. We also discuss why dating apps often lead people to select for traits that don't support lasting partnerships. We discuss how initial attractions form and evolve and which factors best predict romantic relationship stability and satisfaction. We also explain activities that can expand your dating pool, as well as practical tools for building and sustaining healthy romantic relationships. This episode is for anyone currently in or wanting to be in a relationship. Show notes: https://go.hubermanlab.com/P0ICoDV Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman David: https://davidprotein.com/huberman Lingo: https://lingo.com/huberman LMNT: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman Follow Huberman Lab Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hubermanlab Threads: https://www.threads.net/@hubermanlab X: https://x.com/hubermanlab Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hubermanlab TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hubermanlab LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-huberman Website: https://www.hubermanlab.com Dr. Paul Eastwick Website: https://pauleastwick.com Bonded by Evolution (book): https://amzn.to/43P4ccq Love Factually podcast: https://www.lovefactuallypod.com Substack: https://substack.com/@pauleastwick BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/pauleastwick.bsky.social Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pauleastwick LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paul-eastwick-76a2471 Timestamps 00:00:00 Paul Eastwick 00:03:25 Evolutionary Models of Dating, Mate Value 00:08:57 Initial Attraction, Maturity 00:12:56 Sponsors: David & Lingo 00:15:21 Dating Apps; Shared Moments & Developing Attraction 00:24:17 First Impressions & Early Relationships; Partner Bias 00:31:41 Friends & Family Support; Relationship Research, Attachment Theory 00:42:15 Sponsor: AG1 00:43:34 Couple Friends, Advice from Others 00:47:35 Social Support, Women vs Men 00:55:05 Dating App Algorithms, Distrust of Men & Women 01:05:29 Activities & Dating, Observing Date Social Behavior 01:11:25 Texting, Verbal Skills 01:16:15 Sponsor: LMNT 01:17:36 Partner Actions, Dating vs Relationship 01:22:57 Dating & Asking Good Questions; Genuine Connection 01:29:36 Attraction, What Qualities Men & Women Want 01:36:18 Homosexual Dating & Relationships 01:40:08 Finances; Job Loss; Men vs Women, Ambition 01:46:28 Sponsor: Function 01:48:05 Age Difference, Men vs Women Preference; Wanting Children 01:54:58 Church, Activities, Small Groups & Dating; Work; Perceived Similarity 02:07:10 Social Media, Attraction to Alternative Partners, Infidelity 02:19:13 Stranger Attention, Mate Value 02:24:58 Past Relationship Value; Relationship Duration, Breakups 02:34:33 Physical Intimacy & Relationship Satisfaction 02:39:32 Young Adults & Changing Relationships, Technology 02:47:31 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Protocols Book, Sponsors, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter #hubermanlab Disclaimer & Disclosures: https://www.hubermanlab.com/disclaimer

Dr. Paul EastwickguestAndrew Hubermanhost
Jun 22, 20262h 50mWatch on YouTube ↗

Episode Details

EPISODE INFO

Released
June 22, 2026
Duration
2h 50m
Channel
Huberman Lab
Watch on YouTube
▶ Open ↗

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

Dr. Paul Eastwick, PhD, is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and a leading expert on the modern science of mate selection in humans. We discuss what people actually look for in a partner, including surprising findings about age preferences, finances, and physical attractiveness. We also discuss why dating apps often lead people to select for traits that don't support lasting partnerships. We discuss how initial attractions form and evolve and which factors best predict romantic relationship stability and satisfaction. We also explain activities that can expand your dating pool, as well as practical tools for building and sustaining healthy romantic relationships. This episode is for anyone currently in or wanting to be in a relationship. Show notes: https://go.hubermanlab.com/P0ICoDV Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman David: https://davidprotein.com/huberman Lingo: https://lingo.com/huberman LMNT: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman Follow Huberman Lab Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hubermanlab Threads: https://www.threads.net/@hubermanlab X: https://x.com/hubermanlab Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hubermanlab TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hubermanlab LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-huberman Website: https://www.hubermanlab.com Dr. Paul Eastwick Website: https://pauleastwick.com Bonded by Evolution (book): https://amzn.to/43P4ccq Love Factually podcast: https://www.lovefactuallypod.com Substack: https://substack.com/@pauleastwick BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/pauleastwick.bsky.social Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pauleastwick LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paul-eastwick-76a2471 Timestamps 00:00:00 Paul Eastwick 00:03:25 Evolutionary Models of Dating, Mate Value 00:08:57 Initial Attraction, Maturity 00:12:56 Sponsors: David & Lingo 00:15:21 Dating Apps; Shared Moments & Developing Attraction 00:24:17 First Impressions & Early Relationships; Partner Bias 00:31:41 Friends & Family Support; Relationship Research, Attachment Theory 00:42:15 Sponsor: AG1 00:43:34 Couple Friends, Advice from Others 00:47:35 Social Support, Women vs Men 00:55:05 Dating App Algorithms, Distrust of Men & Women 01:05:29 Activities & Dating, Observing Date Social Behavior 01:11:25 Texting, Verbal Skills 01:16:15 Sponsor: LMNT 01:17:36 Partner Actions, Dating vs Relationship 01:22:57 Dating & Asking Good Questions; Genuine Connection 01:29:36 Attraction, What Qualities Men & Women Want 01:36:18 Homosexual Dating & Relationships 01:40:08 Finances; Job Loss; Men vs Women, Ambition 01:46:28 Sponsor: Function 01:48:05 Age Difference, Men vs Women Preference; Wanting Children 01:54:58 Church, Activities, Small Groups & Dating; Work; Perceived Similarity 02:07:10 Social Media, Attraction to Alternative Partners, Infidelity 02:19:13 Stranger Attention, Mate Value 02:24:58 Past Relationship Value; Relationship Duration, Breakups 02:34:33 Physical Intimacy & Relationship Satisfaction 02:39:32 Young Adults & Changing Relationships, Technology 02:47:31 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Protocols Book, Sponsors, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter #hubermanlab Disclaimer & Disclosures: https://www.hubermanlab.com/disclaimer

SPEAKERS

  • Dr. Paul Eastwick

    guest

    Professor of psychology (social psychologist) at the University of California, Davis, specializing in attraction, compatibility, and relationship dynamics.

  • Andrew Huberman

    host

    Professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford School of Medicine and host of the Huberman Lab Podcast.

EPISODE SUMMARY

In this episode of Huberman Lab, featuring Dr. Paul Eastwick and Andrew Huberman, Science of Attraction, Compatibility & Romance | Dr. Paul Eastwick explores attraction is idiosyncratic; relationships thrive through shared moments and support Initial attraction can look like a “marketplace,” but as people spend time together, idiosyncratic preferences and compatibility increasingly outweigh consensus “mate value.”

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