Joe Rogan Experience #1695 - Andrew Schulz

1. 0:00 – 2:54

   Texas reunion, choke attempts, and why jiu-jitsu is addictive

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drumming music plays) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out!

   2. The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music plays) And, hello Andrew.

   4. ASAndrew Schulz0:15

      Hello, Joe.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:16

      Welcome to Texas.

   6. ASAndrew Schulz0:17

      Aw, thank you so much.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:18

      It was good running into you last night. It was funny.

   8. ASAndrew Schulz0:20

      Ah, it was so much fun. Last night was great.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:21

      It was, right?

   10. ASAndrew Schulz0:22

       I choked you out, dude.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:23

       How about that spot?

   12. ASAndrew Schulz0:24

       Did-

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:24

       That golden tiger spot?

   14. ASAndrew Schulz0:25

       Like, can we talk about me choking you out? Can we talk about my-

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:27

       You tried a couple of times. It was interesting.

   16. ASAndrew Schulz0:29

       Yeah.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:30

       You got a hold of my neck.

   18. ASAndrew Schulz0:31

       But did you think I had power? Did you think I had like real choke power?

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       Uh, you could develop it.

   20. ASAndrew Schulz0:36

       (laughs)

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:37

       I think you can develop some real choke power.

   22. ASAndrew Schulz0:38

       Oh, I got a shot immediately, dude. We're 30 seconds in.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:41

       (laughs)

   24. ASAndrew Schulz0:41

       I just got trashed immediately.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:42

       You've got a good build for jiu-jitsu. You're a tall guy.

   26. ASAndrew Schulz0:44

       Uh-huh.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:44

       You got long limbs.

   28. ASAndrew Schulz0:45

       Okay.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:46

       That's really good for jiu-jitsu.

   30. ASAndrew Schulz0:47

       Okay. Nah.
2. 2:54 – 7:47

   Olympic karate controversy: knockouts, point fighting, and kata ‘dancing’ medals

   1. JRJoe Rogan2:54

      Did you see that karate in the Olympics?

   2. ASAndrew Schulz2:55

      I co- I was about to bring it up. It was unbelievable.

   3. NANarrator2:57

      Yeah.

   4. JRJoe Rogan2:57

      The guy loses-

   5. ASAndrew Schulz2:57

      It was unbelievable.

   6. NANarrator2:58

      You can ask him.

   7. JRJoe Rogan2:59

      ... by not... He wins-

   8. ASAndrew Schulz3:00

      How do you feel proud?

   9. JRJoe Rogan3:00

      ... but he loses.

   10. ASAndrew Schulz3:02

       He... How don't you feel proud? You get knocked out-

   11. JRJoe Rogan3:04

       Yeah.

   12. ASAndrew Schulz3:04

       ... in the gold medal matchup, and you win the gold, and the other guy is disqualified?

   13. JRJoe Rogan3:08

       He's disqualified for hitting you too hard.

   14. ASAndrew Schulz3:11

       Hitting you too hard. (laughs)

   15. JRJoe Rogan3:11

       (laughs)

   16. ASAndrew Schulz3:11

       And he, and here's the thing that was fucked up.

   17. JRJoe Rogan3:12

       How dumb.

   18. ASAndrew Schulz3:12

       It's like, it's not like he was standing there. He kinda leaned in to the kick.

   19. JRJoe Rogan3:17

       Yeah, yeah.

   20. ASAndrew Schulz3:17

       Like, he bent over and the dude caught him, so it's kind of on you a little bit too.

   21. JRJoe Rogan3:21

       Yeah.

   22. ASAndrew Schulz3:21

       Let's watch it.

   23. NANarrator3:22

       Yeah.

   24. JRJoe Rogan3:23

       Let's watch it because it's so dumb. And, uh, I didn't... A friend of mine sent that to me and, uh-

   25. ASAndrew Schulz3:28

       Look at this.

   26. JRJoe Rogan3:28

       (clears throat) Here it is.

   27. ASAndrew Schulz3:30

       Look at this. Look, he-

   28. JRJoe Rogan3:31

       He leans back, yeah.

   29. ASAndrew Schulz3:31

       ... he bends over.

   30. JRJoe Rogan3:32

       Yeah.
3. 7:47 – 10:39

   Birthday gifts, Austin weirdness, and the ‘New York is doomed’ debate

   1. ASAndrew Schulz7:47

      Uh, happy birthday. Jamie reminded me it was your birthday.

   2. JRJoe Rogan7:50

      Thank you. Thank you very much.

   3. ASAndrew Schulz7:51

      I have a, I have a present for you.

   4. JRJoe Rogan7:52

      Oh, do you really?

   5. ASAndrew Schulz7:52

      Yeah, yeah. I was waiting-

   6. JRJoe Rogan7:54

      Oh, okay.

   7. ASAndrew Schulz7:54

      ... until the start to give it to you.

   8. JRJoe Rogan7:54

      Oh.

   9. ASAndrew Schulz7:55

      Okay? Here's my present for you.

   10. JRJoe Rogan7:56

       Ooh.

   11. ASAndrew Schulz7:57

       This is-

   12. JRJoe Rogan7:57

       Ooh.

   13. ASAndrew Schulz7:58

       This is, this is a gift.

   14. JRJoe Rogan7:59

       Is it your shirt?

   15. NANarrator7:59

       (laughs)

   16. JRJoe Rogan7:59

       (laughs)

   17. ASAndrew Schulz8:00

       No, this is for you. This is not mine at all.

   18. JRJoe Rogan8:02

       I mean, the shirt looks good. Do you want it?

   19. ASAndrew Schulz8:03

       This is for you. Shouts to Pound 4 Pound for making it.

   20. NANarrator8:05

       Bohemia and Grove?

   21. JRJoe Rogan8:05

       (laughs)

   22. ASAndrew Schulz8:06

       Shouts for Pound 4 Pound for making it for us. (laughs)

   23. NANarrator8:10

       (laughs)

   24. JRJoe Rogan8:11

       1999 Bohemia and Grove. It was amazing.

   25. ASAndrew Schulz8:12

       It was a great year. It was a great year for the Grove, 1999.

   26. JRJoe Rogan8:14

       Look at the quality of this shirt. It's heavy.

   27. ASAndrew Schulz8:15

       There we go. Pound 4 Pound is good stuff.

   28. JRJoe Rogan8:17

       I haven't seen that man.

   29. ASAndrew Schulz8:17

       But I figured you would like this. Happy birthday.

   30. JRJoe Rogan8:20

       Look how heavy that shirt is, and also it's wet.
4. 10:39 – 18:54

   Cuomo scandal satire and ‘I’m Italian’ as a defense

   1. NANarrator10:39

      Did you see Kyle Dunnigan's take on it?

   2. ASAndrew Schulz10:41

      No, what did he do?

   3. NANarrator10:41

      Oh, my God. Kyle Dunnigan-

   4. ASAndrew Schulz10:43

      He's got great stuff. Shouts to Kyle, man. He's got great-

   5. NANarrator10:45

      Shout out to Kyle Dunnigan and, uh, Kurt Metzger, yeah.

   6. ASAndrew Schulz10:48

      And Kurt too. Yeah.

   7. NANarrator10:48

      Yeah, yeah.

   8. JRJoe Rogan10:48

      Kurt, they're being killed.

   9. NANarrator10:48

      I'm having them both come on together.

   10. ASAndrew Schulz10:50

       Oh, God bless 'em.

   11. NANarrator10:50

       They, they have one of the best shows that's ever existed.

   12. JRJoe Rogan10:53

       Yeah.

   13. NANarrator10:54

       First of all, they're doing, they're doing that Biden sitcom.

   14. JRJoe Rogan10:57

       Okay.

   15. NANarrator10:57

       Have you seen that?

   16. JRJoe Rogan10:57

       No, no. I haven't seen that.

   17. NANarrator10:58

       The Fresh Pres?

   18. JRJoe Rogan10:59

       No, no.

   19. NANarrator11:00

       Oh, my God. It's fucking amazing-

   20. JRJoe Rogan11:01

       Uh...

   21. NANarrator11:01

       ... 'cause it's all face swaps.

   22. JRJoe Rogan11:02

       Yeah, yeah, yeah.

   23. NANarrator11:03

       So it's got Biden and the face swaps.

   24. JRJoe Rogan11:04

       Yeah.

   25. NANarrator11:05

       And now he's got- (laughs)

   26. JRJoe Rogan11:06

       Oh, love it.

   27. NANarrator11:07

       ... it's Biden with Ben Shapiro on his left. (laughs)

   28. JRJoe Rogan11:08

       Oh, Ben. On look at AOC.

   29. NANarrator11:10

       He's doing AOC. Yeah, it's fucking amazing. But-

   30. JRJoe Rogan11:13

       Yeah.
5. 18:54 – 21:57

   Biden sniffing clips, cognitive decline, and power corrupting in politics

   1. ASAndrew Schulz18:54

      That's fine. And I don't think it's ... And I think that's a lot of like the Biden thing, like you know like the Biden sniffing kid shit.

   2. JRJoe Rogan18:59

      Hmm. I don't like that.

   3. ASAndrew Schulz19:00

      Bro, it's ... You wouldn't let him sniff your kid?

   4. JRJoe Rogan19:02

      That sniffing kid thing bo- that bothers me.

   5. ASAndrew Schulz19:03

      I'd let him sniff my kids, bro.

   6. JRJoe Rogan19:04

      Really?

   7. ASAndrew Schulz19:05

      100%.

   8. JRJoe Rogan19:05

      'Cause you don't have any kids. Once you have kids, you're like, "Why are you sniffing my kid?" Your, your father instincts would kick in.

   9. ASAndrew Schulz19:11

      (sighs) Let me think.

   10. JRJoe Rogan19:13

       Plus I, I don't think you'd remember if it's a kid or not. I think you'd be confused.

   11. ASAndrew Schulz19:18

       Just in the moment he's like, "This is a full-"

   12. JRJoe Rogan19:19

       Maybe think it's like a smaller person.

   13. ASAndrew Schulz19:20

       That's it. Yeah. Ah, just sniffing midgets.

   14. JRJoe Rogan19:22

       A smaller adult. (laughs)

   15. ASAndrew Schulz19:23

       Dude, that's, that's one of my favorite pastimes, dude. I'm a midget sniffer, dude. Uh, if I see a midget, I gotta smell them, dude. They smell so delicious.

   16. JRJoe Rogan19:30

       (sighs)

   17. ASAndrew Schulz19:31

       I just don't think like ... I think that thing is, is way bigger a deal than it needs to be.

   18. JRJoe Rogan19:36

       The sniffing?

   19. ASAndrew Schulz19:37

       Yeah. Like the cognitive ability is the thing that scares me, not sniffing kids.

   20. JRJoe Rogan19:40

       Right.

   21. ASAndrew Schulz19:41

       Just keep the kids away from him.

   22. JRJoe Rogan19:42

       I think the sniffing kids in public is part of the cognitive decline. Like he doesn't recognize that people don't like that.

   23. ASAndrew Schulz19:48

       But you don't think-

   24. JRJoe Rogan19:49

       Look at him.

   25. ASAndrew Schulz19:49

       ... it's just him being 200? Look at him.

   26. JRJoe Rogan19:51

       Look at all these kids he's sniffing.

   27. ASAndrew Schulz19:51

       Oh, that one on the side is fucked up at the bottom right.

   28. JRJoe Rogan19:54

       All of them are fucked up.

   29. ASAndrew Schulz19:54

       I mean, it looks like he's like pulling ... Yeah.

   30. JRJoe Rogan19:56

       They're all fucked up.
6. 21:57 – 28:36

   Epstein aftermath: blackmail theory, Ghislaine’s role, and why people stop caring

   1. ASAndrew Schulz21:57

      Yeah. I don't know. I just feel like people stop caring. Like it's weird. Like we only have like a certain tolerance for caring.

   2. JRJoe Rogan22:03

      Right.

   3. ASAndrew Schulz22:03

      Like we really cared about the Epstein shit for a minute. Everybody was wearing T-shirts and hashtag this and that. Epstein isn't dead or whatever.

   4. JRJoe Rogan22:10

      Right. He didn't hang himself.

   5. ASAndrew Schulz22:11

      He didn't hang hisself. Yeah. And like now we're like, "Okay." It's like the UFO thing. Like we were really all about it, and then the government was like, "Yeah, there might be some." And then we're like, "Okay. Give us what we need."

   6. JRJoe Rogan22:19

      It's actually pretty dangerous if you think about the fact that you got this guy who is a, a key witness in one of the most high profile sex trafficking things ever.

   7. ASAndrew Schulz22:31

      Hmm.

   8. JRJoe Rogan22:32

      Like what ... If, if what he's ... What they accused him of is accurate-

   9. ASAndrew Schulz22:36

      Yeah.

   10. JRJoe Rogan22:36

       ... and that he really did involve heads of state, politicians, scientists, celebrities-

   11. ASAndrew Schulz22:44

       Yeah.

   12. JRJoe Rogan22:44

       ... and he brought them all to Fuck Island-

   13. ASAndrew Schulz22:46

       Yes.

   14. JRJoe Rogan22:46

       ... and he's filmed them.

   15. ASAndrew Schulz22:47

       Yes.

   16. JRJoe Rogan22:48

       If that's real (clears throat) if he really did have this giant fucking Rolodex of people that he could call-

   17. ASAndrew Schulz22:58

       Hmm.

   18. JRJoe Rogan22:58

       ... and go, "Hey, you know, uh, I got this video."

   19. ASAndrew Schulz23:01

       Yeah.

   20. JRJoe Rogan23:01

       "And uh, I don't want to release it, but-"

   21. ASAndrew Schulz23:03

       Hmm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan23:03

       "... I also want $150 million."

   23. ASAndrew Schulz23:05

       Yeah. He might need to cough that up.

   24. JRJoe Rogan23:07

       Who was that one guy who was the hedge fund guy that it turned out that they, they found that he had given Epstein $150 million?

   25. ASAndrew Schulz23:15

       (sighs) Yeah. This is, uh, this is like the most recent one that came out. He's like a big, uh ... Ah, fuck. What is this guy's name?

   26. JRJoe Rogan23:21

       (clears throat)

   27. NANarrator23:22

       Leon Black.

   28. JRJoe Rogan23:24

       The super rich cat.

   29. NANarrator23:25

       And this guy is also in the news today.

   30. JRJoe Rogan23:27

       He's in the news today?
7. 28:36 – 37:18

   Comedy audiences, ‘woke’ pushback, and how to build jokes for hostile rooms

   1. ASAndrew Schulz28:36

      I guess I'm so just like-

   2. JRJoe Rogan28:38

      Over it?

   3. ASAndrew Schulz28:39

      I'm just out of the, I'm out of the loop, you know? Like, like it's, it's ... I don't know. It's weird. It's like one of these things, I remember I, when we moved back to New York, you know, I started doing shows again and it was like for the first time and like ... It was the first time in like four months that like I did shows for a crowd that like kind of groaned and had like pushback on like ideas or words.

   4. JRJoe Rogan28:59

      Yeah. 'Cause you've been in Miami. (laughs)

   5. ASAndrew Schulz29:00

      And I've been in Miami. And we've been on the road and I've been performing for my guys, right?

   6. JRJoe Rogan29:03

      Yeah.

   7. ASAndrew Schulz29:03

      So it's like they understand what they're coming into. And what's so interesting is I used to be so angry at that. I'd be so angry when audiences do that. Be like, "Why are you guys being fake? Why are you lying to yourselves? You're being hypocrites. You're laughing at this part of the joke, which is way worse than this part, but just this one wet bad word makes you feel uncomfortable." And then I realized like these people would all act the exact same way as the people at my shows if they were in that environment. This is just an unfamiliar environment for them. They're at the Comedy Cellar, but they're there with their coworkers. They might not want their coworkers to know that they find trans jokes funny, or homophobic jokes funny, or racist jokes funny. You're ... There's a level of discomfort-

   8. JRJoe Rogan29:42

      Do you think it's unique that because they're at, with their coworkers-

   9. ASAndrew Schulz29:43

      I think when you're-

   10. JRJoe Rogan29:44

       ... that's unique to New York City?

   11. ASAndrew Schulz29:45

       I think it's like you know how you should be, and you know how you should be in public, and you also know how you are. And I think the great thing, at least that I've been able to experience, is people get to be who they are at these shows, right? So like everybody knows that everybody could get it, any race, religion, anybody. If you're trans, you're gonna get it. Everybody's getting it at the shows.

   12. JRJoe Rogan30:06

       Right.

   13. ASAndrew Schulz30:06

       So everybody submits to that when they walk in. They're okay. But when you're at the random show with people that they don't even know in the lineup, you know, everybody's doing 15-minute spots, you don't know what behavior you should have. So you go in there going, "Okay, I gotta be appropriate like I'm appropriate at work."... and it's up to us to either make the jokes funny enough so that they can kind of let loose a little bit. And that is on us, I'll take that, but also create a culture at the club where the club is like, "Hey, you're allowed to laugh. It's okay to laugh. It's okay."

   14. JRJoe Rogan30:36

       Mm-hmm.

   15. ASAndrew Schulz30:36

       'Cause I guarantee every one of those people, if they came to one of my shows, would just fall in line. They'd just fall right the fuck in line.

   16. JRJoe Rogan30:40

       Because they would be there with your fans.

   17. ASAndrew Schulz30:42

       They'd be there for their f- and they'd see, like-

   18. JRJoe Rogan30:43

       And people would understand it.

   19. ASAndrew Schulz30:44

       Exactly. They-

   20. JRJoe Rogan30:45

       Yeah. But that's the one good thing about having your own show, where people know what to expect.

   21. ASAndrew Schulz30:49

       Mm-hmm.

   22. JRJoe Rogan30:50

       But it's also the one good thing about being in a place like The Cellar or The Store-

   23. ASAndrew Schulz30:53

       Mm-hmm.

   24. JRJoe Rogan30:53

       ... where you're dealing with 15 people a night, where you can't get away with that.

   25. ASAndrew Schulz30:58

       Yep.

   26. JRJoe Rogan30:58

       And so you need to-

   27. ASAndrew Schulz30:59

       You need the balance.

   28. JRJoe Rogan31:00

       You need to figure out how to finesse people that might not agree with your ideas-

   29. ASAndrew Schulz31:03

       100%

   30. JRJoe Rogan31:04

       ... and, uh, it allows you to, like, structure your jokes in a way where you're, you know, you make 'em more palatable with the same ideas-
8. 37:18 – 44:21

   Schulz’s near-drowning surfing story and BJ Penn’s wave-pool nightmare

   1. ASAndrew Schulz37:18

      Like, I try to go on vacation with, with, with my girl and we went to, after last time I came here.

   2. NANarrator37:23

      Mm-hmm.

   3. ASAndrew Schulz37:24

      We went to Hawaii.

   4. NANarrator37:24

      Yeah?

   5. ASAndrew Schulz37:24

      We went to Lanai.

   6. NANarrator37:25

      Yeah.

   7. ASAndrew Schulz37:26

      And, uh, I almost died, by the way.

   8. NANarrator37:28

      What happened?

   9. ASAndrew Schulz37:28

      I almost drowned.

   10. NANarrator37:29

       What?

   11. ASAndrew Schulz37:30

       Yeah.

   12. NANarrator37:30

       For real?

   13. ASAndrew Schulz37:30

       I did drown, actually. (laughs) Yeah.

   14. NANarrator37:32

       What do you mean?

   15. ASAndrew Schulz37:32

       I was surfing. Uh, yeah, that was crazy.

   16. NANarrator37:35

       What happened?

   17. ASAndrew Schulz37:36

       Uh, well, the whole time I was trying to surf. I grew up surfing, right? When I was here I went to Waco, I, to surf there.

   18. NANarrator37:41

       Yeah.

   19. ASAndrew Schulz37:41

       Waco is an amazing place. Um, and I was trying to organize surfing on the island of Lanai. Lanai is the one island that's, like, blocked from northern swells, so there's no surf. The one island. I didn't realize this. I'm like, "We're going to Hawaii, there's going to be surf." Right? Of course. I go to the hotel, "Can I get a surfboard?" They're like, "No, we really don't recommend. This is only for, like, experts and that kind of stuff." And I'm like, "I've been surfing my whole life, I'll be okay." So I find a way, I asked a million different people. I finally find a way, contact this guy Lanai, who's from Lanai. He's a, a guy, he's a celebrity out there in Hawaii, and, uh, good friends with BJ Penn.

   20. NANarrator38:12

       Oh.

   21. ASAndrew Schulz38:13

       Yeah, who, who has one of the most horrifying stories, by the way, of getting caught in a wave pool.

   22. NANarrator38:17

       Yeah, I heard about that.

   23. ASAndrew Schulz38:18

       I mean, this was ... Jesus Christ. So, uh, I finally get a surfboard. They drop it off at the hotel and the hotel's like, "Please, you shouldn't surf." And I'm like, "Ah, it's gonna be fine." They have once in a decade waves while I'm there. This never happens. It's supposedly flat the whole time in winter. Once in a decade right outside of the hotel, okay?

   24. NANarrator38:36

       Hmm.

   25. ASAndrew Schulz38:38

       I don't know how to relax. Like, I, I don't know how to just sit on a thing and relax. I can't do that, right? My girl learned that about me when we went there. So I'm like, "Let me just go surf." I surf the first day, fun. Surf the second day, fun. I go one more day I'll surf and then we'll just do activities for the rest of the time. I go out there, I catch a few waves. The waves are breaking off of this point, right? So that, that means that there's reef here and there's some rocks. And the rocks, the wave wraps around the rocks and the rocks starts to break and then they go. You take off on the wave really close to the rock, okay? And, uh, if you're, what I was basically doing is watching the, the locals take off. And I was just taking off a little bit further outside than them. I'm like, "If that's where they take off, I go a little outside, I'll be okay." I went out, it was only two of us. Every day there'd be like four of us. It was like nobody surfing. It was un- unbelievable the luck that I got. It's just me and another white dude from, like, North Carolina or some shit. So I don't know exactly where the takeoff is, so I'm a little bit deeper. Big one comes in. I'm like, "Okay, I got this." I go, paddle, pop up. I fall on the takeoff, right? Not a big deal. I fall on waves all the time. I'm getting thrashed around a little bit. It's like head high waves, nothing like that crazy. But, like, I get thrashed or whatever. I try to go to the surface and I can't. Like, what the fuck is going on here, right? I didn't even really care about my breath when I first went in because I'm not intending on being down for that long. You know what I'm saying?

   26. NANarrator39:57

       Right.

   27. ASAndrew Schulz39:57

       Like, it's, it's, it's just a little tumble. I just went off the wave, nothing.

   28. NANarrator39:59

       Right.

   29. ASAndrew Schulz40:00

       Try to go up, I can't. Try to go up, I can't. I try to pierce the, the, the, the surface and I exhale right before.

   30. NANarrator40:11

       (gasps)
9. 44:21 – 52:28

   North Korea debate: skepticism vs documented atrocities and propaganda

   1. ASAndrew Schulz44:21

      Heavy shit. But, yeah, I g- I guess I need to keep doing things. See? Take that, North Korean lady. That's a real story about struggle.

   2. JRJoe Rogan44:28

      (laughs)

   3. ASAndrew Schulz44:28

      (laughs) Yo, yo, yo. Yo, that was the most entertaining depressing fucking podcast, bro.

   4. JRJoe Rogan44:37

      (laughs)

   5. ASAndrew Schulz44:37

      Oh, my god.

   6. JRJoe Rogan44:38

      Damn you.

   7. ASAndrew Schulz44:38

      Do you think it's all real?

   8. JRJoe Rogan44:40

      Oh, it's 100% real.

   9. ASAndrew Schulz44:41

      'Cause I was reading some shit-

   10. JRJoe Rogan44:41

       Bro, she's so small, she's so small from, from lack of food. Like, she's-

   11. ASAndrew Schulz44:46

       Not all of her, Joe.

   12. JRJoe Rogan44:48

       Yeah, well I think that was after the fact.

   13. ASAndrew Schulz44:50

       Not all of her.

   14. JRJoe Rogan44:50

       I think that was, uh, I think a doctor was involved.

   15. ASAndrew Schulz44:53

       You think so?

   16. JRJoe Rogan44:53

       Yeah.

   17. ASAndrew Schulz44:54

       'Cause I almost shaking-

   18. JRJoe Rogan44:55

       But shaking her hand?

   19. ASAndrew Schulz44:56

       ... I almost started making my girl eat rats after I saw her, dude.

   20. JRJoe Rogan44:59

       (laughs)

   21. ASAndrew Schulz44:59

       I saw her talk on that podcast, all they ate is rats. I was like, "Oh, did ya?" (laughs)

   22. JRJoe Rogan45:04

       (laughs) It was mostly, uh, grasshoppers, I think.

   23. ASAndrew Schulz45:06

       Grasshoppers?

   24. JRJoe Rogan45:06

       Yeah.

   25. ASAndrew Schulz45:07

       Whatever, fry 'em up, dude.

   26. JRJoe Rogan45:08

       Yeah, yeah, I get it.

   27. ASAndrew Schulz45:11

       (laughs)

   28. JRJoe Rogan45:12

       (laughs)

   29. ASAndrew Schulz45:12

       She came outta North Korea stacked.

   30. JRJoe Rogan45:14

       Yeah, she's... definitely. Um, she's, uh, like 80 pounds.
10. 52:28 – 55:52

    Miami ‘balling,’ Europe tour ideas, and building a traveling content crew

    1. ASAndrew Schulz52:28

       Yeah, it just fell apart in Miami, and I just started doing all this stuff.

    2. JRJoe Rogan52:31

       Started balling.

    3. ASAndrew Schulz52:32

       I started balling again.

    4. JRJoe Rogan52:32

       See, that's what I'm saying. You look like you're- you were balling a little down there.

    5. ASAndrew Schulz52:35

       Ah, dude, that's-

    6. JRJoe Rogan52:35

       I thought you were gonna stay there.

    7. ASAndrew Schulz52:36

       ... fuck.

    8. JRJoe Rogan52:36

       I was hoping you were gonna stay there.

    9. ASAndrew Schulz52:37

       You wanted me to stay?

    10. JRJoe Rogan52:38

        Yeah, I did.

    11. ASAndrew Schulz52:39

        You wanted me to stay?

    12. JRJoe Rogan52:39

        I liked what you were doing down there, and I felt-

    13. ASAndrew Schulz52:40

        Ah, fuck.

    14. JRJoe Rogan52:40

        ... like you could change the comedy scene in Miami. Like-

    15. ASAndrew Schulz52:43

        They ... It would've been good.

    16. JRJoe Rogan52:44

        ... you being down there, you would've- you would've invited other degenerates to move down there too.

    17. ASAndrew Schulz52:48

        I know. I know.

    18. JRJoe Rogan52:48

        And they would all move down there and start wearing these Hawaiian shirts-

    19. ASAndrew Schulz52:52

        (laughs)

    20. JRJoe Rogan52:52

        ... and big straw hats. (laughs)

    21. ASAndrew Schulz52:54

        (knocks on desk) We leaned in, huh?

    22. JRJoe Rogan52:58

        (laughs)

    23. ASAndrew Schulz52:58

        Look at this asshole. How many buttons are unbuttoned? Look at it.

    24. JRJoe Rogan53:01

        I love it. I love it.

    25. ASAndrew Schulz53:03

        Look at it.

    26. JRJoe Rogan53:03

        I love it. I love it. You know where I think, uh, I think we're gonna go? This is what I wanna do. I really liked going there. I'm curious about your take on this. So, I was thinking of, like, doing, like, a European ... Some shows in Europe, right? Mm-hmm.

    27. ASAndrew Schulz53:16

        And obviously, if things are open or whatever, come- maybe come next summer. So, I was like, "What if we spent, like, a- a month and a half in, like, Italy, and then did the shows on the weekends, and then podcasts and stuff during the week, so it was almost like a shorter version of what we did in Miami?"

    28. JRJoe Rogan53:32

        You definitely could do that. Um-

    29. ASAndrew Schulz53:34

        Be fun, right?

    30. JRJoe Rogan53:35

        Yeah, you could do that anywhere you ... How big is your crew? How many people do you tr- travel with?
11. 55:52 – 1:14:27

    Australia lockdowns, variants, vaccines, monoclonals, and ‘leaky’ protection

    1. JRJoe Rogan55:52

       Did you see the fucking... The, the latest?

    2. ASAndrew Schulz55:55

       The articles?

    3. JRJoe Rogan55:55

       People are freaking out in Australia-

    4. ASAndrew Schulz55:57

       Ugh, it's so funny.

    5. JRJoe Rogan55:57

       ... because he was talking shit about Australia. (laughs)

    6. ASAndrew Schulz55:59

       It's so funny.

    7. JRJoe Rogan56:00

       He's like, "They used to be in lockdown." They like it 'cause they can just get drunk in their backyard.

    8. ASAndrew Schulz56:05

       Yeah, yeah. (laughs)

    9. JRJoe Rogan56:05

       And people in Australia are like-

    10. ASAndrew Schulz56:06

        How dare he? (laughs)

    11. JRJoe Rogan56:06

        ... "What is he saying? How dare he?" But here's the thing, man. They've had nine deaths since, like, last October.

    12. ASAndrew Schulz56:12

        Right.

    13. JRJoe Rogan56:12

        Their, their lockdowns are fucking preposterous. And that's what happens when you take guns away from people.

    14. ASAndrew Schulz56:16

        Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. Okay.

    15. JRJoe Rogan56:18

        You take guns away from citizens.

    16. ASAndrew Schulz56:19

        Okay.

    17. JRJoe Rogan56:19

        They took all their guns in the '90s.

    18. ASAndrew Schulz56:20

        Yeah.

    19. JRJoe Rogan56:21

        Look at this. American Comedian Jokes-

    20. ASAndrew Schulz56:22

        This is hilarious.

    21. JRJoe Rogan56:23

        ... "Australians love lockdowns 'cause they're lazy descendants of criminals who," (laughs) "who, who don't want to work" and "restrictions aren't that bad-"

    22. ASAndrew Schulz56:30

        It's amazing.

    23. JRJoe Rogan56:31

        "...'cause they just want to get hammered in their backyards." (laughs)

    24. ASAndrew Schulz56:33

        I love it. I love it. Every time, like, they... Every time that they take him seriously and they print it in, like, a newspaper or an article...

    25. JRJoe Rogan56:41

        Look at this.

    26. ASAndrew Schulz56:41

        Yeah.

    27. JRJoe Rogan56:42

        "Dillon has a point, as opinion polls consistently show overwhelming support for lockdown-happy premiers like Western Australia's Mark McGowan."

    28. ASAndrew Schulz56:50

        Mark McGowan.

    29. JRJoe Rogan56:50

        "Even Daniel Andrews, at the heart of Victoria's five-month outbreak last year, approved of his ultra-harsh stage four lockdown." It's fucking dumb.

    30. ASAndrew Schulz57:01

        Yeah.

Episode duration: 3:11:12