Joe Rogan Experience #2018 - Post Malone

1. 0:00 – 15:00

   (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast,…

   1. NANarrator0:00

      (drumming music) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

   2. The Joe Rogan Experience.

   3. JRJoe Rogan0:06

      Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. (rock music) Yo, bro, what's happening, my brother?

   4. PMPost Malone0:14

      I'm hanging out.

   5. JRJoe Rogan0:15

      Dude, you look fucking great. I told you that when I saw you-

   6. PMPost Malone0:17

      Thank you, sir.

   7. JRJoe Rogan0:17

      ... but I wanna tell you that on air. You look fucking great, man.

   8. PMPost Malone0:20

      Thank you, sir.

   9. JRJoe Rogan0:20

      You said you lost 60...

   10. PMPost Malone0:21

       Like 6... I was like 240, now I'm like 185.

   11. JRJoe Rogan0:24

       That's amazing.

   12. PMPost Malone0:25

       Yes, sir.

   13. JRJoe Rogan0:25

       And you did it just by cutting out soda-

   14. PMPost Malone0:28

       Yeah. I don't drink.

   15. JRJoe Rogan0:29

       ... and a lot of shows.

   16. PMPost Malone0:30

       Yeah, like shows, soda. Soda's so bad.

   17. JRJoe Rogan0:34

       It's so bad. (laughs)

   18. PMPost Malone0:35

       It's so bad. But it's so good. I'll have a soda. I'm a bad boy and I'll have a Monster Energy.

   19. JRJoe Rogan0:39

       Every now and then.

   20. PMPost Malone0:40

       But Celsius is so good too. Have you had one of those?

   21. JRJoe Rogan0:43

       Yeah, I have. They're good.

   22. PMPost Malone0:43

       It's so good.

   23. JRJoe Rogan0:44

       Yeah. The, the key to those things is just every now and then. That's the thing.

   24. PMPost Malone0:49

       Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

   25. JRJoe Rogan0:49

       You know, every now and then you reward yourself with a Coca-Cola.

   26. PMPost Malone0:52

       Yes, sir.

   27. JRJoe Rogan0:52

       You're like, "Ah, this is nice."

   28. PMPost Malone0:53

       Oh, man, and these hot Texas days.

   29. JRJoe Rogan0:56

       Mm-hmm.

   30. PMPost Malone0:56

       I've been here, we did Dallas two days yesterday, back-to-back. Yesterday and the night before.
2. 15:00 – 30:00

   Right. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan15:00

      the facilitation of language. And he thinks that all those things coincided with climate change. So as, as these rainforests receded, these lower hominids came out, tried mushrooms, started eating them, and kept eating them for millions of years. And that was a part of the diet. And as they did this, and as they understood what to get and what to eat-

   2. PMPost Malone15:20

      Right.

   3. JRJoe Rogan15:20

      ... they, they looked for it, and they ate it, um, all the time. And it probably gave them a lot of ideas for how to make tools.

   4. PMPost Malone15:27

      Right.

   5. JRJoe Rogan15:27

      It probably gave them ideas like how to harness fire. And he thinks it's the source of human evolution.

   6. PMPost Malone15:34

      Shroomies.

   7. JRJoe Rogan15:35

      Shrooms.

   8. PMPost Malone15:35

      That's amazing.

   9. JRJoe Rogan15:36

      Amazing.

   10. PMPost Malone15:37

       I believe, I believe it.

   11. JRJoe Rogan15:37

       And they're illegal, which is hilarious.

   12. PMPost Malone15:39

       Are they?

   13. JRJoe Rogan15:39

       Imagine that. Yeah. They're federally-

   14. PMPost Malone15:41

       I don't want to leave the house.

   15. JRJoe Rogan15:41

       They're federally... Yeah. (laughs)

   16. PMPost Malone15:43

       (laughs) I don't know.

   17. JRJoe Rogan15:44

       They grow whether you like them or not.

   18. PMPost Malone15:46

       Not that I have them, not that I have them there. It's just... (laughs)

   19. JRJoe Rogan15:48

       My buddy, Duncan, lived in Asheville, North Carolina. And they had so many shrooms that were growing on cow shit-

   20. PMPost Malone15:53

       Hmm.

   21. JRJoe Rogan15:53

       ... that they started giving the cows a certain kind of feed to discourage the fungus growth. They put chemicals-

   22. PMPost Malone16:01

       Here's a-

   23. JRJoe Rogan16:01

       ... in their feed-

   24. PMPost Malone16:02

       Here's-

   25. JRJoe Rogan16:02

       ... to kill the fucking fungus, the most natural thing.

   26. PMPost Malone16:05

       Y- can you get, can you get in trouble? Say you have a bunch of cattle, right? Can you get in trouble and then someone from the DEA shows up and starts flipping over your patties?

   27. JRJoe Rogan16:16

       It would be a hard thing. I mean, they'd have to really be going after you, because obviously that shit just grows naturally.

   28. PMPost Malone16:20

       Right.

   29. JRJoe Rogan16:21

       And it's not like... You don't have to do anything. They, they're everywhere. They're, they're everywhere. Like Duncan said, it's like there's... 'Cause the way, um, mushrooms work is there's spores, right? But then there's the most of the, the, what you see that pops out of the ground is like the fruit of the actual mushroom.

   30. PMPost Malone16:40

       Right.
3. 30:00 – 45:00

   Sure. …

   1. JRJoe Rogan30:00

      weird, because then you feel like all these people that you're running into, like, they're potential problems, or they're potential threats, or they're potential annoyances. Like, let me get away from these people.

   2. PMPost Malone30:10

      Sure.

   3. JRJoe Rogan30:11

      And it's just, that's not how it is when there's a few people.

   4. PMPost Malone30:14

      Right.

   5. JRJoe Rogan30:14

      Like, when you're walking down the street in a small town-

   6. PMPost Malone30:16

      Right.

   7. JRJoe Rogan30:16

      ... and you see somebody. You're like, "What's up, dude? How you doing, man?"

   8. PMPost Malone30:18

      No shit, there's a person there. What's up? (laughs)

   9. JRJoe Rogan30:19

      Yeah. "Hey," person.

   10. PMPost Malone30:20

       "What's up?" (laughs)

   11. JRJoe Rogan30:21

       "Hi," other person. It's just when it's thousands of them and they're all around you-

   12. PMPost Malone30:24

       Yeah.

   13. JRJoe Rogan30:24

       ... nobody talks to anybody.

   14. PMPost Malone30:25

       Yeah.

   15. JRJoe Rogan30:25

       Like, you don't strike up a casual conversation when you're in a crowded line filled with people walking down the street.

   16. PMPost Malone30:32

       Right.

   17. JRJoe Rogan30:32

       People don't talk.

   18. PMPost Malone30:33

       Everybody's got their own shit to do.

   19. JRJoe Rogan30:35

       Yeah.

   20. PMPost Malone30:35

       And, and, and it's so weird. Like, you look at, like, even 100 years ago.... like, people would sit down, like, on a bench, and just be like, "What's up?"

   21. JRJoe Rogan30:45

       Yeah.

   22. PMPost Malone30:45

       Like, what's the, how- how are, like, have, and have, like, conversations.

   23. JRJoe Rogan30:48

       Yeah.

   24. PMPost Malone30:48

       And I was, I, I don't remember exactly where I was, but I think I was in New York doing something, and there was a guy, I was doing, like, a show, and we were in this building, and there was, like, a smoking area outside. And there was this guy playing chess with himself.

   25. JRJoe Rogan31:04

       Wow.

   26. PMPost Malone31:04

       And, and my buddy goes up, and he's like, "Hey, can I play chess with you?" And I was like, "Yeah." And it's just like how shit would've gone, like-

   27. JRJoe Rogan31:13

       Yeah.

   28. PMPost Malone31:13

       ... 100 years ago.

   29. JRJoe Rogan31:14

       Right.

   30. PMPost Malone31:14

       But now, it's just like, I don't wanna talk to anybo- like, you know, it's so fucking weird, man.
4. 45:00 – 1:00:00

   That's fucking... That's badass.…

   1. JRJoe Rogan45:00

   2. PMPost Malone45:01

      That's fucking... That's badass. And, but to be able to pull that out is pretty cool.

   3. JRJoe Rogan45:05

      Yeah.

   4. PMPost Malone45:05

      But the Lockpick Lawyer, he can get into, like, anything. Yeah, this is... Dude, it's so cool, man. This... See, this is the, this is the Lexic- Lexus, uh, RX300. I love this lock. Um-

   5. JRJoe Rogan45:19

      You know locks?

   6. PMPost Malone45:20

      No, sir.

   7. JRJoe Rogan45:21

      (laughs)

   8. PMPost Malone45:21

      But as you, uh, but as you see here with this, uh-

   9. JRJoe Rogan45:24

      Oh, the little things it's got?

   10. PMPost Malone45:24

       ... with this toy 48, with the toy 48.

   11. JRJoe Rogan45:27

       Oh.

   12. PMPost Malone45:27

       Man, he'll get in here so quick.

   13. JRJoe Rogan45:29

       Oh, my God, he can get in anywhere with these things.

   14. PMPost Malone45:31

       And that's my favorite lock, so...

   15. JRJoe Rogan45:33

       This is crazy. Look how he's doing this.

   16. PMPost Malone45:35

       (laughs) That's your favorite lock?

   17. JRJoe Rogan45:37

       Look how he's doing this. This is nuts.

   18. PMPost Malone45:39

       So they'll make... They'll do, like, challenges for him, and he'll just get in there no problem. It is so... And I never was interested, but this shit is like... it's like ASMR. It is so fun to watch. And I'll just watch this all night. Um-

   19. JRJoe Rogan45:55

       This is wild how he's doing this-

   20. PMPost Malone45:57

       It's amazing.

   21. JRJoe Rogan45:57

       ... where he's literally figuring out where the key slots are-

   22. PMPost Malone46:00

       Yeah.

   23. JRJoe Rogan46:00

       ... and pushing it into place.

   24. PMPost Malone46:01

       So these cards are pretty cool. So they, they make them for specific locks.

   25. JRJoe Rogan46:07

       Wow.

   26. PMPost Malone46:07

       And you can just get in there and find, uh-

   27. JRJoe Rogan46:10

       That's crazy.

   28. PMPost Malone46:11

       ... like all the grid and all the indicators and shit like that. I don't know exactly how it works.

   29. JRJoe Rogan46:16

       Wow.

   30. PMPost Malone46:16

       Don't listen to me about it.
5. 1:00:00 – 1:10:49

   Well, how do you…

   1. JRJoe Rogan1:00:00

      s-... You know, just a little break from things.

   2. PMPost Malone1:00:03

      Well, how do you find time, Joe?

   3. JRJoe Rogan1:00:05

      I make it, force it. Just force it. Give me one of them Bud Lights. Fuck it.

   4. PMPost Malone1:00:11

      Fuck it. Got it. Let's go.

   5. JRJoe Rogan1:00:12

      They're cold too.

   6. PMPost Malone1:00:13

      We've been drinking Bud Light consistently on this show. Yeah? I'm sure the comments are afire- (laughs) ... with those, those folks that like to get riled up about stupid shit.

   7. JRJoe Rogan1:00:23

      Well, that's what I said, you know. I, I... Before the show, I was like, just back to the conversation we were just having. There's not a lot of comfort in the modern world, man. And I've been drinking this forever.

   8. PMPost Malone1:00:38

      Yeah.

   9. JRJoe Rogan1:00:38

      And I don't-

   10. PMPost Malone1:00:39

       Gives you comfort.

   11. JRJoe Rogan1:00:40

       I'm drinking my fucking... I'm gonna... Goddammit, I'm gonna drink a fucking beer, Joe Rogan.

   12. PMPost Malone1:00:44

       Yeah. A Bud Light too.

   13. JRJoe Rogan1:00:46

       I'm gonna drink a fucking Bud Light, and it's yummy.

   14. PMPost Malone1:00:48

       Forget about everybody's outrage.

   15. JRJoe Rogan1:00:50

       (laughs)

   16. PMPost Malone1:00:50

       Settle down, everybody. Relax. They fucked up, so let them off the hook. They fucked up. This one thing, it's not even that big a deal, but when- It's-

   17. JRJoe Rogan1:00:58

       ... when Kid Rock shoots your fucking beer, it's game over.

   18. PMPost Malone1:01:01

       It was a cool MP5, though.

   19. JRJoe Rogan1:01:04

       (laughs) It was.

   20. PMPost Malone1:01:05

       It was. It was a cool gun.

   21. JRJoe Rogan1:01:06

       When Kid Rock shoots your beer.

   22. PMPost Malone1:01:07

       But that's... I... You don't wanna... You... First off, you gotta buy the beer. And you know how much ammo is nowadays, so it's just like... (laughs)

   23. JRJoe Rogan1:01:13

       It was an expensive publicity stunt, but I think it was well worth it. Well, if you look at the impact that it did, that's what's crazy. I guess people are just looking for shit to get annoyed with lately.

   24. PMPost Malone1:01:26

       Yeah. I mean, I don't know. It, it's...

   25. JRJoe Rogan1:01:30

       ... it's interesting. And I- I- I- I love watching the show because it's so ... you just talk.

   26. PMPost Malone1:01:40

       Yeah.

   27. JRJoe Rogan1:01:41

       You just talk, and me and, me and my friends, we say, "You know, it's nice because you don't have any judgment, and you listen to, to people talk, and you actually have a conversation, which is really nice."

   28. PMPost Malone1:01:56

       Well, in this age of short attention span, it's, that shit doesn't appeal to everybody. There's a lot of people that aren't interested in that.

   29. JRJoe Rogan1:02:03

       Right.

   30. PMPost Malone1:02:03

       And they're interested in long form conversations. They're interested in reading books. They're interested in just, just listening to music just for the sake of listening to music.

Episode duration: 4:41:31