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Lewis HowesLewis Howes

AFTER THIS You'll Change How You DO EVERYTHING | Tony Robbins & Lewis Howes

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Lewis HoweshostTony Robbinsguest
Apr 4, 201654mWatch on YouTube

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Transcript

  1. 0:00 – 0:04

    Intro

    1. LH

      [intro music]

  2. 0:04 – 1:54

    Growing Up Poor and Feeding Millions

    1. LH

      Welcome back everyone to the School of Greatness podcast. Thank you so much for being here. I am in Tony Robbins' jet. Good to see you.

    2. TR

      [laughs] Nice to see you as well.

    3. LH

      Thanks for, thanks for inviting me on your jet. I'm very excited to be here. The last-

    4. TR

      It's kind of a crazy place to meet, but I have to go, so [laughs]

    5. LH

      I... Yeah, yeah.

    6. TR

      This is the quick run and gun interview.

    7. LH

      You've got a documentary coming out right now that you're headed-

    8. TR

      Yes

    9. LH

      ... to Palm Springs for.

    10. TR

      Yes.

    11. LH

      So we're, we're doing it on the jet, which is incredible. And it inspires me about the topic we- we're covering, which is on your book, Money: Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom. Uh, you've shown that you have the financial freedom, but you didn't always have financial freedom. In fact, when you were growing up, you were really poor, right?

    12. TR

      Extremely.

    13. LH

      Extremely poor.

    14. TR

      We had no money for, at Thanksgiving for food. It's part of why last year I fed... I started feeding when I was 17. I started feeding families 'cause I was fed when I was 11. And I fed two families literally, and it was so moving I said, "I'm gonna double it." I went to four and then to eight, and then it was a, like a game to see could I-

    15. LH

      Yeah

    16. TR

      ... reach more people. And then I started with some of my employees, and then eventually I got to a million people a year, then two million. Then I started matching my foundation with two million. So for 12 years I fed, uh, four million people a year. And then when I was writing this book-

    17. LH

      Yeah

    18. TR

      ... I'm interviewing, if you can imagine, all these people that started with nothing and are multi-billionaires. At the same time, Congress cut food stamps, it's called SNAP now, but it was food stamps originally, by $8 billion.

    19. LH

      Wow.

    20. TR

      So it's equivalent, to give you an idea, of every family that's being supported giving up all their meals one week out of every month for 12 months.

    21. LH

      Wow.

    22. TR

      So I decided I wanted to do something about it, so I got a $5 million advance for the book and I gave all the money to Feeding America. And then I said, "If I want to feed 100 million, what I gotta do," so I wrote a much bigger check. And now I'm so at, uh, we did 102 million people last year.

    23. LH

      Wow.

    24. TR

      But now I'm gonna do 100 million again this year, and I got a plan to feed a billion people over the next 10 years. So I'm, um-

    25. LH

      That's-

    26. TR

      ... i- it's, it's so full circle from where I began.

    27. LH

      Wow.

    28. TR

      It's crazy and it's, uh, it's, it's an incredible privilege to be able to make a difference like that.

  3. 1:54 – 5:14

    Why Giving Comes Before Wealth

    1. LH

      How is... Why is it important to be thinking of giving and contribution in order to generate wealth? When people say that, "Well, I don't have much to give."

    2. TR

      Yeah.

    3. LH

      "I'm barely making enough to pay my rent, my food."

    4. TR

      Yeah.

    5. LH

      "How can I have the mindset of giving in order to build wealth?" What would you say?

    6. TR

      It's, it's the only... Y- you never get beyond scarcity, you gotta start beyond it. You gotta plant your feet. And, um, you know, so many people say, "Well, when I'm rich I'll give some money." [laughs]

    7. LH

      Right.

    8. TR

      If you won't give a dime out of a dollar, you're not... I can promise you, you're not gonna give 10 million out of 100 million.

    9. LH

      Right.

    10. TR

      Not in a trillion years. So if you, but if you start, what I always believe is it, it transforms you. When you... I had a group of kids that I went to, like when I was 31 years old I was invited to this, uh, grade school in Houston, Texas. And I, each grade did a little mini assembly for me of what they, how they used my stuff, you know, at that year. And at the end I was really emotional and I was like, "You guys asked me to come inspire you. You've inspired me." And so the sixth graders had only done it for one year and I said, "I'm gonna sponsor your college educations." I had no idea how I was gonna do it. I didn't have the money to do it, but I said-

    11. LH

      How old were you?

    12. TR

      I was 31 years old.

    13. LH

      Wow.

    14. TR

      I was doing well, but not that well. [laughs]

    15. LH

      [laughs]

    16. TR

      And I said, "I'm gonna pay for your college educations," but I said, "Here are the rules of the game." And I just made it up while I was right there. I said, "You gotta keep a B average. I'll get you mentors. There's no excuse not to be above average. You gotta not use drugs, you not get yourself in prison, and you gotta give me 20 hours of community service a year."

    17. LH

      Wow.

    18. TR

      And the reason I did that is I don't have a college education, but I knew if I got these kids who thought they needed something to be the ones to go give something, it would change their identity. It would change their life more than college.

    19. LH

      Right.

    20. TR

      And ironically, I think we had 70 kids originally. I lost, 95% of the kids I was gonna lose I lost the first year. It was like 30 kids, and the reason was their parents did not want them to have to do community service. They said-

    21. LH

      No way

    22. TR

      ... they should be receiving, they shouldn't have to work. And it was just staggering to me.

    23. LH

      Wow.

    24. TR

      But the ones that did it, I mean, some have PhDs now, went through that process. So I really believe that the secret to living is giving, as corny as it sounds. I had an experience where I was driving on the 57 freeway not far from here in San Gabriel Valley, and it was midnight. I was driving my 1968 Volkswagen Bug, Baja Bug. And I was, been in business for, you know, a year, year and a half.

    25. LH

      [laughs]

    26. TR

      And I was working my guts out, and I was so frustrated because, you know, I always say that most people overestimate what they can do in a year, and they underestimate what they can do in a decade or two or three, right? So I had been working for this year and a half as hard as I could work, and nothing was working at the level I wanted and I was so frustrated. I was mad with myself, I was mad with the environment. I was feeling overwhelmed and stressed. It's midnight, I'm exhausted. And all of a sudden this thought hit me, and I literally pulled over on the side of the road. And I have always kept physical journals. I still have the journal to this day. And I wrote on this one whole page, "The secret to living is giving."

    27. LH

      Wow.

    28. TR

      And I sat there and I cried, 'cause I just realized my life for the last year had gotten focused on why isn't it working instead of how do I give more. And I made that shift, and it was one of the most important shifts of my entire life. And for probably a year things started to get better. And then, you know, you're in business, you make mistakes, you know? To, you know, I was a young, young kid, and I found myself all of a sudden in a 400 square foot bachelor apartment. I'd lost the progress that I'd made. And I was so broke that

  4. 5:14 – 10:42

    The El Torito Story and Letting Go of Scarcity

    1. TR

      I wrote about this at the end of my book, uh, 'cause I was trying to think, how do I get this thought across to somebody? And the most seminal moment for me was I had, I don't know, 21, $22, whatever it was, to my name. I'm living in a 400 square foot bachelor apartment. I'm feeling sorry for myself. I'm watching Luke and Laura on General Hospital.

    2. LH

      [laughs]

    3. TR

      I mean, I was a mess. I was a total mess. And I realized I've not paid my rent and I'm out of money, and I don't have any prospects for some new cash in the short term.

    4. LH

      Right.

    5. TR

      How am I even gonna eat? So I decided to go to this all you can eat salad bar that they had around the corner, this place called El Torito. It's still there in Marina del Rey.

    6. LH

      Yeah.

    7. TR

      And I lived in Venice, so it was about a three-mile walk. I didn't take the car 'cause I didn't, couldn't have paid for parking, you know, for the gas. And I walked there and I went in and I had this meal where I basically loaded up for the winter. I, you know, I ate plates of food. [laughs] Just tacos and salads and everything else. And while I was sitting there, there was this little boy that came in. He opened the door, and he was wearing this little vest, this little suit. And he, I don't know, probably nine years old, something like that, you know, eight, nine, 10. And, and he held the door open and, and in walks behind him this beautiful woman who was clearly his mother. And so, you know, I definitely took it in.

    8. LH

      [laughs]

    9. TR

      And then he sat down, he pulled out the chair for her, and he was just so attentive to his mother. I mean, he was just so with her that honestly I was moved. And so I finished my meal, and then I got up, and I paid the bill and, I don't know, it was like six dollars in those days-

    10. LH

      Yeah

    11. TR

      ... you know, for all-you-can-eat salad bar, whatever it was. And so I had whatever's left, $17, 18, $19, and I walked over to this little boy before I left and I said, "Hi," and I introduced myself. I said, "I'm Tony," and he told me his name was Paul or whatever it was.

    12. LH

      [laughs]

    13. TR

      I don't even remember his name, this little boy. I said, "Paul," I said, "You are a class act." I said, "I saw you held the door open for your woman."

    14. LH

      Yeah.

    15. TR

      "I saw you pulled out the chair for her." I said, "Taking her out to lunch like that, that is really cool." And he goes, "Well, she's my mom."

    16. LH

      Right. [laughs]

    17. TR

      [laughs] And I said, "That's even more cool." And I said, "Taking her to lunch..." He goes, "Well, I didn't take her to lunch." He goes, "You know," what I think he said he was eight or nine, he said, "I'm nine years old, I don't have a job yet," you know? And I said, "Yes, you are taking her to lunch." And I reached in my pocket and I took all the money I had left, whatever it was, $17, 18, $19, and I dropped it in front of him. I had no plan to do this. It wasn't, like, manufactured. I wasn't trying to impress this woman. And he looked up at me, like, shocked, and he goes, "I can't take that." And I said, "Sure you can." He said, "How come?" I said, "'Cause I'm bigger than you are," right?

    18. LH

      [laughs]

    19. TR

      And he laughed like crazy, and I didn't even say another word. I just walked out the door, didn't even look at his mom.

    20. LH

      You didn't get her number, huh?

    21. TR

      No, [laughs] I didn't get her number.

    22. LH

      [laughs]

    23. TR

      And I gotta tell you, it was the most powerful experience of my life-

    24. LH

      Wow

    25. TR

      ... because I didn't walk home, I kind of flew home. And I should have been like, "What is the matter with you? You have no money for food. You gave the last little pennies you have left." But I had no fear, I had no scarcity. And I got home, and I realized what I'd done. It was like, "I have no money now."

    26. LH

      Right.

    27. TR

      "I have, like, no money, nothing," right? I was trying to conserve by going there, you know? And I don't, I don't know, I just, I worked out a plan. I figured I'll make some... I'll figure this out. And the next day, I got the old snail mail, and came in around, like, noon, and I pull out this letter, and there was a, a young man that I had loaned $1,200 to, and he had not paid me back, and I was desperate for cash.

    28. LH

      Yeah.

    29. TR

      So I probably called him 10 times trying to track him down. Not a single response, and I was so hurt and pissed. And here's the letter from this guy saying, "I'm really sorry. I know you've been trying to reach me."

    30. LH

      Wow.

  5. 10:42 – 16:16

    Influences, Mentors, and Staying Hungry

    1. LH

      Who was the most influential person in your life growing up?

    2. TR

      Well, my mom was, um, in that she, she taught me to... She demanded that I show up in a different way than most people would, um, meaning she wanted me to grow, she wanted me to be successful. She pushed me incredibly hard. But also she was kind of, you know, she was a drug addict, a prescription drug addict.

    3. LH

      Wow.

    4. TR

      She overused those, and she was an alcoholic. We had no money and we lived in a 1,200 square foot house, and my four different fathers all lived in the living room-

    5. LH

      Yeah, yeah

    6. TR

      ... at different stages. She had her own room, and she would call me every day on the phone, 11955, so you could ring your own phone, and I'd pick it up, and she'd give me instructions, and I'd go to the s- store on my bicycle, and I'd buy the groceries, and I'd make the meal. I really literally didn't see my mom most days.

    7. LH

      Mm.

    8. TR

      Um, and I didn't understand any different. So she gave me an incredibly high standard and she gave me a big challenge. And she was physically abusive. She smashed my head against the wall till I bled. She poured liquid soap down my throat till I threw up-

    9. LH

      Wow

    10. TR

      ... 'cause she thought I was lying.

    11. LH

      Wow.

    12. TR

      And yet I loved her, and I knew she loved me, so it's confusing as hell, but she made me a practical psychologist-

    13. LH

      Wow

    14. TR

      ... 'cause I had to figure out, I have a younger brother five years younger, a younger sister seven years younger, and I had to figure out- How am I going to keep them from getting hurt? And if she had been the mother I thought I wanted, I wouldn't be one tenth as driven. I wouldn't... You know, I suffered so much, I don't want anybody else to suffer.

    15. LH

      Right.

    16. TR

      That's why I'm as driven as I am. I don't have to do anything at this stage of my life, but I'm, I'm more driven today than when I began. So she was the most influential person. The next most influential person, um, were a set of mentors. I had Jim Rohn, you know, the personal development speaker I went to work for when I was 17. Massively influenced my philosophy. Uh, John Grinder, who started NLP-

    17. LH

      Yeah

    18. TR

      ... taught me strategy. He taught me how to produce results that people thought would take decades in, in days and, and in minutes. And, um, and I became his top student and so forth. So, and then along the way, I've had incredible mentors. Peter Guber, who owns the-

    19. LH

      Yeah

    20. TR

      ... NBA Warriors and the LA Dodgers and, you know, Mandalay Pictures. One of my dearest friends for 30 years plus. Um, Mark Benioff, you know, I've been-

    21. LH

      Yeah

    22. TR

      ... coaching him for 16 years from the day he started Salesforce. You know, he told me, "Tony, I'm leaving my company because of you. I'm gonna start this company, salesforce.com. We're gonna do 100 million a year." Now they're doing eight billion.

    23. LH

      [laughs]

    24. TR

      Um, so I've got some really-

    25. LH

      Sure.

    26. TR

      Steve Wynn is a mentor for me. So I have a lot of brilliant people, and I'm always, I coach others and I get coached by others.

    27. LH

      Yeah. Yeah. You've been doing the work for 40 years, right?

    28. TR

      Well, not quite. [laughs]

    29. LH

      Almost 40 years.

    30. TR

      39. It's my 39th year.

  6. 16:16 – 18:19

    Legacy: Planting Seeds and Being a Blessing

    1. LH

      in a few sentences, what would you say is your current vision for life? What's, what's the vision you have, and what's the legacy that you wanna leave behind?

    2. TR

      I saw, uh... Have you seen Hamilton the play in New York?

    3. LH

      I hear it's incredible.

    4. TR

      I just wanna-

    5. LH

      Everyone's raving about it.

    6. TR

      Yeah.

    7. LH

      You've seen it, right, Nick?

    8. TR

      Yeah.

    9. LH

      Yeah, it's amazing, right?

    10. TR

      Isn't it extraordinary?

    11. LH

      It's amazing, yeah.

    12. TR

      Yeah.

    13. LH

      It's just amazing.

    14. TR

      I, I loved it. I, I thought it was a lot, might be a lot of hype, but it was as good as, as the promise.

    15. LH

      Really?

    16. TR

      There's a line in Hamilton that I thought was really interesting. It says, "Legacy is planting seeds in a garden that you'll never see."

    17. LH

      Oh.

    18. TR

      I thought it was really interesting. Um, but so for me, I know-

    19. LH

      What's the, what's the garden you wanna create you'll never see?

    20. TR

      Yeah, yeah.

    21. LH

      [laughs]

    22. TR

      For me, it's human lives. For me, it's, it's I love... My life is about being a blessing in the lives of the people I meet. I hope that whoever decides to watch your video, um, I hope something here will strike them, and they can say, "You know, I gotta get in proximity," or, "I gotta raise my standard," or, "I'm gonna go master my damn money. I'm not gonna dabble." I hope that it stimulates someone in a way where it becomes a blessing in their life.

    23. LH

      Yeah.

    24. TR

      And my legacy is the lives that I've touched, and my legacy is the institutions that I'm building right now that when I'm gone will continue to touch people, my foundation, the work that I'm doing with mentoring with kids.

    25. LH

      Mm-hmm.

    26. TR

      Um, I mean, the ability to touch another generation. But my heartfelt prayer every day is be a blessing. And you know, it's interesting. Sometimes you're a blessing just by giving somebody a few moments-

    27. LH

      Yeah

    28. TR

      ... just by loving on them, just being with them. Sometimes you're being a blessing 'cause you coach them or you intervene with them. Um, you can be a blessing in so many ways, but that's my daily focus, and it's not what I'm gonna build for the long term. It's really what am I gonna do right now.

    29. LH

      Why is that? I mean, why do you wanna create that legacy?

    30. TR

      Um, again, it's less about legacy than it is about- Doing what I'm made for while I'm here and maximizing. I, you know, I want the end to have me... I wanna be climbing the mountain when I die, not sliding. [laughs]

  7. 18:19 – 22:01

    Staying Grounded: Ego, Grace, and a Teenage Sportscaster Dream

    1. LH

      How do you stay grounded in your personal and intimate relationships when everyone wants a piece of you? You know, you sell out events, 10, 20, 30,000 people-

    2. TR

      Yeah

    3. LH

      ... come to your conferences, pay tens of thousands of dollars. Um, everyone wants to interview you.

    4. TR

      Yeah.

    5. LH

      Uh, you're coaching presidents, billionaires, world-class athletes. They call you, they want you-

    6. TR

      Yeah

    7. LH

      ... to help them break through the next level. How do you stay grounded in your marriage, or with your kids, or with, you know, friends?

    8. TR

      Yeah. My mom, my mom's craziness gave me a great gift. Um, I wanted to be a professional athlete, and, uh, wanted to be a professional baseball player, and when I got cut from the junior high school team-

    9. LH

      [laughs]

    10. TR

      ... I figured out I'm in trouble. [laughs] And so I decided to become a sportscaster, a sports writer.

    11. LH

      Oh, wow.

    12. TR

      And so I took typing when I was in junior high school.

    13. LH

      Wow.

    14. TR

      I, I was the only boy in an all-girl, uh, shorthand class, so I could capture everything, 'cause I wanted to be the best reporter-

    15. LH

      I get it

    16. TR

      ... best sportscaster. I interviewed Howard Cosell and Woody Hayes and Dodgers and Rams.

    17. LH

      Wow.

    18. TR

      I got a job working for a daily newspaper when I was 13.

    19. LH

      Yeah.

    20. TR

      Um, and then I got this huge break, which was I got these interviews no one had, like Joe Namath when he was so famous.

    21. LH

      Yeah.

    22. TR

      I got these interviews, and, uh, here in LA, KTTV Channel 11, it's now a Fox channel, um, they were trying to get viewership, and so they kept trying different kinds of sportscasters. They even tried Fanny Foxx the stripper. And-

    23. LH

      [laughs]

    24. TR

      ... and somebody watched some interviews I did-

    25. LH

      Yeah

    26. TR

      ... and went, "Holy shit, this 14-year-old kid," I was about to be 15, "he's brilliant, and he's getting interviews nobody else is getting," you know?

    27. LH

      Wow.

    28. TR

      So they called me up, and they offered me the job to be the nightly sportscaster a- as I was turning 15.

    29. LH

      Wow.

    30. TR

      And I was out of my mind. Like, the dream I was gonna have when I was, like, 25 or 30-

  8. 22:01 – 23:28

    Failure and the Purpose of Goals

    1. LH

      do you ever question choices or decisions you make today? Ca- And does-

    2. TR

      Well-

    3. LH

      ... does everything you touch turn into what you want it to be?

    4. TR

      No, of course not.

    5. LH

      No?

    6. TR

      No. Um, failure is part of life.

    7. LH

      Yeah.

    8. TR

      I mean, uh, the difference for me, though, is I look at failure as a stepping stone to success. It's a, it's a speed bump. Uh, I know I'm gonna fail. Um, but it's not failure if you learn something. And so-

    9. LH

      Yeah

    10. TR

      ... gosh, I've, I've made so many mistakes.

    11. LH

      Yeah.

    12. TR

      I've screwed so many things up, but every time I do, it just becomes, it becomes a way for me to explain to someone else what it takes. You know, it's like, "Here's what I've done." I, I think I have the ability to influence people 'cause I talk about my failures, I talk about all the things that mess me up, but I show people that I didn't let it stop me, and you don't need to let it stop you.

    13. LH

      Right.

    14. TR

      And I think, I think that's really the secret there.

    15. LH

      Right. And if everything you touch was successful-

    16. TR

      First of all-

    17. LH

      ... you probably wouldn't be able to relate to people as much, right? [laughs]

    18. TR

      No, you wouldn't be able to relate, and also it'd be total bullshit-

    19. LH

      Right

    20. TR

      ... and everyone would know it's bullshit. And also you'd be bored silly.

    21. LH

      Right.

    22. TR

      I mean, think about it. If you just said, "I want this," and it happened, "I want this," and it happened, you know, people don't value what they don't fight for.

    23. LH

      Mm.

    24. TR

      You know? It's like you see kids sometimes in a... You know, your parents will say, "You're not gonna value this if you don't work for it." And you're a kid going, "I'll value it, just give it to me," right?

    25. LH

      [laughs]

    26. TR

      But it's true.

    27. LH

      Yeah.

    28. TR

      You know? The things-

    29. LH

      Yeah

    30. TR

      ... we've worked the hardest for, we value the most.

  9. 23:28 – 27:12

    Money and Marriage: The Squeaky Negotiator

    1. LH

      now I'm curious about relationships and building wealth.

    2. TR

      Yeah.

    3. LH

      Is it important to... Or, or how important is it to have the right partner in a marriage or an intimate relationship in relating to building wealth? Does it matter who you choose, their mindset? Um, does any of that play the effect on how much you're gonna make, or...?

    4. TR

      It won't affect how much you make, but it'll affect how, [laughs] your relationship a lot, right?

    5. LH

      Uh-huh.

    6. TR

      You know, getting on the same page is really, really important. But when my wife and I met, my wife, we both grew up very poor. But I decided that I was going to find a way to add so much value that money would never be a question for my family and, and, you know, it would never stop me from giving or doing or sharing anything. And I made that decision early on, so I became an earner. I have ways of earning. She became a negotiator, a cost manager. Her mom's number one thing if somebody comes in, she goes, "Sharpen your pencil. That's not a good enough deal."

    7. LH

      That's right.

    8. TR

      And so when we first met, I remember we were, we were in New York City, and this dates me how old I am, but I remember when they first came out with digital cameras, the very first digital cameras from Sony.

    9. LH

      [laughs]

    10. TR

      And it was, like, such a cool thing. You could take 12 pictures or whatever it was in those days.

    11. LH

      [laughs]

    12. TR

      But we were down in, um, New York City. We're in Times Square, and we went into one of those camera shops, and it was Christmastime. And I saw the camera and I was, like, so excited about this camera. And I said, "You know what? I'm gonna get one for my brother, my sister, my mom," and, you know, I came up with, I don't know, it was like 12 cameras. And they were very expensive then.

    13. LH

      Yeah.

    14. TR

      I think they were like $1,200 or $2,000 each.

    15. LH

      Yeah.

    16. TR

      They were really crazy.

    17. LH

      Now they're like $200 for the same thing.

    18. TR

      Yeah. No, not, not even. It's a million times better.

    19. LH

      Yeah.

    20. TR

      But I go up to the counter and the guy goes, "Oh my God, Tony Robbins, can I take a picture with you? I'll put it on the wall and sign..." I said, "Sure." And she goes, "Hey." She goes, "Sharpen your pencil. What kind of deal are you gonna give my boyfriend here?"

    21. LH

      Oh my gosh.

    22. TR

      And I wanted to grab her by the throat-

    23. LH

      [laughs]

    24. TR

      ... and just go, "What are you doing here?" It's like, "What are you doing?" And, and she's like, "No, no, what's the deal here?" And he goes, "Oh, well, uh, I'll give you 10% off." She goes, "Sharpen your pencil. 10%?"

    25. LH

      Wow.

    26. TR

      "You're not taking a picture with my boyfriend." And I wanted to murder her, right?

    27. LH

      Wow.

    28. TR

      And I was so mad. I mean, I was so mad. And so she got, like, 15% off and free camera cases and [laughs] all this stuff.

    29. LH

      [laughs]

    30. TR

      And I'm shaking my head. And we left and I was like, "I'm so..." We had this big fight.

  10. 27:12 – 29:57

    Money as a Magnifier and Understanding the Rigged System

    1. LH

      there's a lot of people that I grew up with who were poor, who had a negative mindset around money.

    2. TR

      Yes.

    3. LH

      They thought it was evil, that it was bad.

    4. TR

      Yeah.

    5. LH

      What would you say to someone who has that mindset where they just, they have a story around money that isn't a positive one?

    6. TR

      Yeah.

    7. LH

      They think of money, they think of evil, bad, corruption, whatever it may be.

    8. TR

      Yeah.

    9. LH

      How does someone shift it? Like, what's... Is it a daily practice? Is it something they can do right away?

    10. TR

      It's the truth. Get to the truth. The truth is simple. Money does not change people. Money makes you more of what you are. It's a magnifying tool.

    11. LH

      Interesting.

    12. TR

      If you're mean, you got a lot more to be mean with. If you're generous, you got a lot more to be generous with and give. So it's, it's bullshit that money is anything. All money is, is a symbol, and we all project on that symbol different things.

    13. LH

      Yeah.

    14. TR

      You can, you know, if you feel out of control with money, then you're gonna project it as evil. If you feel incompetent and you see someone else more successful, "Oh, they're the 1%, they're the jerks."

    15. LH

      Right.

    16. TR

      Usually, by the way, they're the 0.001% you're pointing at. [laughs]

    17. LH

      Right.

    18. TR

      But it used to be aspirational to be in the 1%.

    19. LH

      Yeah.

    20. TR

      Today there's this new mindset that says they're evil, they're wrong. The people in our society that say they're the 99% are lying because half this planet lives on $2.50 a day.

    21. LH

      Yeah.

    22. TR

      Right? $900 a year. If you are considered in poverty in the United States, you are the 1% of earners in the world. You are the 1%.

    23. LH

      In poverty.

    24. TR

      In poverty in the U-

    25. LH

      US

    26. TR

      ... US poverty.

    27. LH

      In the US, you're the 1% of the world.

    28. TR

      Is the 1% of the world's earners.

    29. LH

      Wow.

    30. TR

      So what you're doing is saying, "Poor me," while you're typing on your Apple computer-

  11. 29:57 – 37:51

    Fees, Fiduciaries, and the Dual Registration Problem

    1. TR

      But it literally is the 50 smartest minds- ... in the world. And we were talking before we started the interview that you learned something new over the last six months or year- Yeah ... since writing the book came out. Yeah. Can you share with us- Something new and disappointing ... can you share with us, talking about fiduciaries? Yes. Well, w- the first thing that I did was most people don't understand that there are lots of things you can't control in the system, but there are a few things you can control, and that's what you focus on and you can win. Right. And one of those is you can't control where the markets are gonna go, real estate, stock, anything. Yeah. But you can control fees, and that sounds so third grade. Like, what does that matter? And not sexy. Not sexy. But when I met with Jack Bogle, who created Vanguard, I mean, the largest index fund in the world, they got $3 trillion- Wow ... with a T, um, and 63 years in the business, he said, "Tony, I know you care. You've got to uncover for people where the fee structures are." Like, for example, most people in America have their money in their home or their 401 [k] . Uh-huh. And there's more 401 [k] s than there are homes, right? Yes. He said, "Tony, the abuse in that system is so bad." So when you uncover the fees, and I did this in the book, I created a system where people could go into showmethefees.com if they had a 401 [k] , and it showed you exactly what the fees are and what it means to you compounded. Because every 1% in fees you pay more than you need to, because of compounding, means you gave up 10 years of income when you go to retire. Mm. So for example, the average person puts their money in a mutual fund. They don't know which mutual fund to go to. They look on Morningstar maybe. It's five stars. If it's five star, you're already overpaying for it. It's not gonna- Right ... stay a five star. And the average mutual fund pays 3.12%, all right? That's the cost. Now, you think it's 1%, but there's a 35-page document that if you know how to read it- All the fees ... you'll find 17 other fees, right? Yeah. Well, why does that matter? It's only 3%. It's 3% compounded year after year. So what happens is you go out and you put a- you put yourself in this position, and you could have paid for Vanguard, for example, an index fund, 14 basis points. That's 14/100 of a percent, of 1%. The other person's paying 3% for the same product. It's the exact same set of stocks. Right. So what's the difference? Well, those 3% are gonna cost you, to give you a perspective, 60% of what you earn is gonna go to somebody else- Mm ... that didn't have to go to them, just 'cause you were ignorant. Right. So it's kinda like, do you wanna buy a Honda Accord, an example I always give, is $20,000? But in this case, $20,000 Honda Accord, you're paying 1.24 million. That's the difference between .14 and 3.12. Sure, sure. And so there are people living next door to each other that are paying 1000% more, most of them 100% more, than their neighbor for the same product. There's no industry in the world except the financial industry we can do that, and the way they do it is by confusing you so much that you give up and say, "Just, you know, manage my money," and so they take it away from you. So in the book, I explain how to do that. I also built a site, another site, called portfoliocheckup.com, and I built it so you could put all your accounts in there, not just 401 [k] . It pulls them for you in two minutes, shows you all the costs, shows you how much risk you're truly taking, and compares you to some of the best portfolios in the world so you know how it compares. I don- just like the book, I donated all the profits from it, didn't do anything. And then if you wanted to work with someone, I taught everyone, 90% of the people in the financial markets, uh, that you go to as a wealth manager, investment manager, they're a broker. Yeah. And there's nothing wrong with a broker except they're just a salesman, and they're gonna sell you what the house tells them to sell you, 'cause the house always wins. Right. And they, they're gonna sell you underperforming assets, 'cause mutual funds, 96% of them never match the market over any 10-year period of time. So it's gonna underperform, and they're gonna overcharge you. So I said go to a fiduciary, new word for everybody. Okay. The F-word, fiduciary. [laughs] All it means is there's a small percentage of the population that's required by law to put your needs ahead of their own, meaning if I told you... I'm a fiduciary, and I tell you to buy Apple this morning, and then the stock drops and I buy it later today for myself, I have to give you my stock. That's how strong the law is. Really? Yeah. All right. Small group, they're called RIAs, registered investment advisors, or fiduciaries. So I built this platform, gave away all the money, and then said, "Go to a fiduciary," and I recommended the seven largest fiduciaries in the country. And then five months ago, I had one of the guys on the platform, his name is Peter Mallouk, and he has a company called Creative Planning. And Creative Planning is the number one rated firm in the world, number one independent wealth manager by Bloomberg for three years in a row. That's- no one's ever done it for three years. Two years in a row for CNBC. And he built this family office. It's like billionaires have a family office. It's a place where they have eight or nine people who one works on protecting you, one works on your mortgages, one works on your taxes, one to make sure you get the most efficiency, one's working on your investments. And all billionaires have a family office. He built a family office for people that are multimillionaires. Uh-huh. And so he comes to meet with me, and he said, "Tony, I wanna share something with you." He goes, "There are these hidden rules in the law, these gray areas, that are people are on the edge legally, and everyone on your platform is doing this." And he said, "It's called dual registration." And what's that? He said, "I tell you I'm a fiduciary, so now you trust me." [laughs] "And legally I'm responsible to take care of you." Uh-huh. "But I have this dual registration, so in the middle of the conversation, I can switch hats and become a broker, and you don't know it." Wow. "And I can sell you some product that c- costs two or three or 4%, and it underperforms, and you don't even know it. You think I'm giving you independent advice, and it's not independent advice." And I did the homework, and every firm, including some people I really like, were doing it, 'cause it was a way to get more margin for their business. Sure. So it's not right. So I kicked everybody off the platform, and I sat down with Peter and I said, "You're the only guy of size..." He has 20 billion in assets he's approaching right now. Wow. I said, "You're the only guy, and you're number one." I said, "I wanna recommend more people to you, but you only do billionaires and multimillionaires." Right. I said, "Keep doing that. You got the greatest practice in the world. But how about you build something, another division, that'll work with people with as little as $50,000, and give them the CPA, the tax, give them everything- Right ... the same." And he charges less than 1%. 1.2 is the highest for somebody with, like, no money, and it goes down to 25 basis points. I said, "People don't, people charge more than that just for the financial advice. You're doing everything."

    2. LH

      Yeah.

    3. TR

      I said, "If you do that, I'll partner with you."

    4. LH

      Mm.

    5. TR

      So he ag- he took three weeks, came back to me, went back and forth, started building a new division. Over the last five months he's been building it. So now I'm on his board of advisors, and I'm also the chief of investment psychology.

    6. LH

      Yeah.

    7. TR

      So I educate both the general public and his people on how to meet people's financial needs at a different level. And I got him to create a second opinion, which means i- if you had a health challenge, anybody smart knows no matter what this person tells you, get a second opinion and go to the best.

    8. LH

      Yeah.

    9. TR

      'Cause there's so many opinions about what to do health-wise. There's so many opinions what to do financially.

    10. LH

      Yeah.

    11. TR

      So I said, "Why don't you give a second opinion from the number one firm on earth? Why don't you provide that, give people a plan, and then they can go implement on their own if they want, or for less than 1% they can go with you." I think most people will end up going with you.

    12. LH

      Right.

    13. TR

      So he's agreed to do it, and anyone who wants to can go to thenumberonefirm.com.

    14. LH

      Yeah.

    15. TR

      thenumberonefirm.com, or they can go to creativeplanning.net.

    16. LH

      Okay.

    17. TR

      And you can just apply. They'll interview you. They'll take you through a process. They'll build a plan for you, and then you can go implement it or you can work with them.

    18. LH

      Amazing. Amazing. Uh, a few questions left for you-

    19. TR

      Yeah

    20. LH

      ... if that's cool. And, uh, we'll have all this linked up here at the end, so if you're listening to the podcast, I'll give you guys the show note information soon. If you're on YouTube watching this, this will all be linked up below. And also I'm gonna do something. For anyone watching this on YouTube, the first 100 people to leave a comment and share this video, I'm gonna buy you a book. I'm gonna send you one of his books, a paperback copy, uh, for the first p- 100 people that do that.

    21. TR

      Oh, that's cool.

    22. LH

      Um, 'cause I wanna get the message out there.

    23. TR

      That's great. By the way, every book that is bought, 50 people are fed.

    24. LH

      There you go.

    25. TR

      So all the money still goes out-

    26. LH

      There you go

    27. TR

      ... in the paperback just like that.

    28. LH

      There you go. You should buy one as well and give it away.

    29. TR

      [laughs] That's awesome.

    30. LH

      That's what you should do. Um,

  12. 37:51 – 39:23

    Gratitude, Family, and Work-Life Integration

    1. LH

      final few questions. What are you most grateful for in your personal life?

    2. TR

      My wife, by far. I mean, I love my children completely, but my wife is truly the greatest gift in my life.

    3. LH

      Mm.

    4. TR

      My kids are adults, I'm so proud of them. Um, but she is nothing but love. She's as mission driven as I am. Uh, she doesn't have the same constitution I do. So, you know, I'm a crazy person-

    5. LH

      [laughs]

    6. TR

      ... 50 hours in a weekend on stage, you know. I do literally 18 miles on the first day.

    7. LH

      Yeah.

    8. TR

      You've seen-

    9. LH

      I've seen 'em

    10. TR

      ... running around, jumping off the stage, getting people involved.

    11. LH

      I've walked on, fly, I've done it all.

    12. TR

      Yes, I know.

    13. LH

      It's amazing. Yeah, yeah. [laughs]

    14. TR

      I do literally 26 miles to 27 on the third day, where I start at 8:30 in the morning and finish at 1:00 AM with one one-hour break. So the demands I make on my body are intense. My wife has the same will I have, not the same physical, so I try to take care of her that way, but her love, her joy, her happiness lifts my soul and spirit. People say, "Who inspires you?" I say, "My wife," in the first place. Uh, I love my children. I'm so close. One of my-

    15. LH

      Jarek, the buddy, yeah

    16. TR

      ... other sons, Jarek is, I know a friend of yours.

    17. LH

      Yep.

    18. TR

      He's a tremendous coach. I'm really proud of him. One of my other sons is a partner in some of my financial businesses-

    19. LH

      Nice

    20. TR

      ... Josh. So my family is in- involved with my mission, which I'm really grateful for, 'cause people talk about work-life balance, and it's bullshit. Anybody who's an overachiever, you're not gonna find balance. Balance is-

    21. LH

      No

    22. TR

      ... like a teeter-totter, you know. If you're in a teeter-totter and you get balance for 10 minutes, you and I, what are we gonna do after 10 minutes? Somebody's gonna start jerking this around to have some fun.

    23. LH

      Boring shit, yeah, yeah.

    24. TR

      Right? You're gonna be bored out of your mind. So I think of it as work-life integration.

    25. LH

      Yeah.

    26. TR

      And the more you can get the people you love involved with what you do for your mission or for your work-

    27. LH

      Mm

    28. TR

      ... um, then you don't have to worry about that w- work-life balance.

    29. LH

      I love that. I love it. That's a good answer. Thank you. Um,

  13. 39:23 – 48:52

    Three Truths and Choosing a Beautiful State

    1. LH

      I don't think I asked you this question last time, so I wanna see what your, your answers are. I've been asking everyone else recently, though. Uh, if this is many, many years down the line, it's your last day. It's a very happy day. Everyone's there. You've created everything you've ever imagined. The seeds you planted are happening, and the gardens are being, you know, created everywhere. Um, but everything you ever produced, physical books, audio, workshops, videos, have all been erased for whatever reason.

    2. TR

      Yeah.

    3. LH

      And you have one piece of paper. Your great-great-great grandchild says, "Here's a piece of paper. Can you write down three truths, three things that you know to be true that you could, that we could remember you by?"

    4. TR

      Yeah.

    5. LH

      "Since we don't have anything else, but these are the three things that is like your Bible-

    6. TR

      Yeah

    7. LH

      ... the lessons that we should be remembered-

    8. TR

      Yeah

    9. LH

      ... remembering to use and to follow for the rest of our lives." What would you say, those three things?

    10. TR

      Love is everything.

    11. LH

      Yeah.

    12. TR

      Um, uh, the secret to living is giving.

    13. LH

      Mm.

    14. TR

      And remember that the most important decision of your life is deciding whether you're truly committed to being happy no matter what.

    15. LH

      Mm.

    16. TR

      Because life is gonna throw all kinds of curveballs at all of us. Uh, there's, the one thing that's in common in this lifetime is extreme stress. You're gonna experience it if you haven't already, and even if you have, you will in the future. How you like this positive thinking?

    17. LH

      [laughs]

    18. TR

      But it's just true. Someone you're gonna care about is gonna die. Someone's gonna take advantage financially if you're not careful. You're gonna find yourself in a position the government might change the rules, and you can't do what you were doing before. Um, somebody call, like I've gotten a call saying you got a tumor in your brain. Those days alter you.

    19. LH

      Yeah.

    20. TR

      And if you decide that you're gonna live in a beautiful state of mind, that doesn't just mean happy. It means, uh, n- people say, "Oh, yeah, I'm committed to be happy, but my wife left me." Well, then you're not committed to being happy. You're committed to be happy unless your wife leaves you, and you can't control that. You know, you can certainly influence it, but you can't control it. Or, "I'm gonna be happy except my friend died." Your friends are gonna die.

    21. LH

      Yeah.

    22. TR

      Your family are gonna die. So the greatest gift you could give yourself besides making this life about love and making this life about giving, because to give you have to keep growing-

    23. LH

      Mm

    24. TR

      ... is, I believe, to make that decision and say, "Life is too short to suffer."

    25. LH

      Mm.

    26. TR

      And most achievers like you and I, we'd never use the word suffering, but we get stressed, we get pissed, we get overwhelmed. Some people get sad or depressed, and those are all forms of suffering. And all your entire life you live in one of two states, states of suffering or beautiful states of being. And in a beautiful state of being... [door opening] Hey, guys. [laughs] In a beautiful state of being... We're still filming.

    27. LH

      Last couple minutes. Sorry. [laughs]

    28. TR

      [laughs] That's good for your film. [laughs] Thanks, Kirby.

    29. LH

      No, that's good.

    30. TR

      [laughs] Yeah, I know we're late. We're finishing right now.

  14. 48:52 – 53:56

    Acknowledgment and Greatness in Givers and Nuns

    1. TR

      of them.

    2. LH

      Of course, I love it. One final question. Before I ask it, I want to, uh, acknowledge you, Tony, for, uh, everything. When I was 16, I told you this the last time, when I was 16, my dad got me and my mom a ticket to go watch you in St. Louis-

    3. TR

      Yeah

    4. LH

      ... at a big, uh, arena.

    5. TR

      Yeah.

    6. LH

      Um, actually, Donald Trump was speaking there.

    7. TR

      I remember that.

    8. LH

      And Larry King-

    9. TR

      Yes

    10. LH

      ... who I just had dinner with recently, was speaking over a ca-

    11. TR

      Yeah

    12. LH

      ... uh, over a TV.

    13. TR

      Yeah.

    14. LH

      And, uh-

    15. TR

      By video, by Skype.

    16. LH

      Yeah, by Skype and/or whatever it was then.

    17. TR

      Yeah.

    18. LH

      This is 20 years ago or something.

    19. TR

      Yeah.

    20. LH

      Um, and I, uh, I never heard about you before. My dad said, "You gotta go do this," because I was going through a lot. I'm going through a lot emotionally.

    21. TR

      Yeah.

    22. LH

      And I remember listening and watching in be- I was more inspired by, like, um, the football coaches that were there and the-

    23. TR

      Yeah

    24. LH

      ... and the, the athletes. I think Jerry-

    25. TR

      St. Louis Rams.

    26. LH

      Yes, he was there.

    27. TR

      Yeah.

    28. LH

      I think Jerry Rice might have been there or something else like that.

    29. TR

      Yeah, yeah.

    30. LH

      And I was more in- interested in that.

Episode duration: 54:00

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