CHAPTERS
- 0:00 – 2:01
Six questions to make next year your best (and why looking back matters)
Mel introduces a 22-year year-end ritual built around six questions to help you plan intentionally. She explains why “an amazing year doesn’t happen by chance,” and why self-awareness—especially about what was hard—is the real starting point for change.
- •Planning works best when you start by reviewing the last 12 months
- •Low points don’t mean you’re broken; naming them is self-awareness
- •Awareness creates clarity about what needs to change
- •This ritual is simple, repeatable, and used in Mel’s family for decades
- 2:01 – 9:03
Set up the ritual: workbook, phone, calendar, and the “look back before you look forward” rule
Mel explains the most common planning mistake: skipping reflection and rushing into goals. She gives a practical setup—workbook or paper plus your phone—so you use real evidence (photos/calendar) instead of unreliable memory.
- •Use your camera roll and calendar to avoid memory bias
- •Reviewing the year reveals forgotten highs, lows, and lessons
- •You need the true starting point before you can map directions forward
- •Reflection helps you avoid repeating mistakes and double down on what worked
- 9:03 – 10:33
The research case for reflection: writing to your future self changes behavior
Mel shares research showing that even short writing exercises can strengthen connection to your future self and improve daily choices. This becomes the psychological bridge between who you were, who you are, and who you want to become.
- •CSU/UCLA research: connecting past-present-future increases bonding to future self
- •That bond can increase exercise and intentional daily behavior
- •Writing makes goals feel more real and actionable
- •The six questions create a “bridge” to the future you
- 10:33 – 15:05
Question 1 — Identify the low points (and process them without shame)
Mel starts with the hardest question: what were the low points of the year, and why it’s healthy to face them. She explains that acknowledging difficulty helps your brain process events and reduces the lingering stress of unprocessed emotion.
- •Low moments don’t automatically mean it was a ‘bad year’
- •UC Irvine/Penn State findings: suppressing emotions increases stress and health issues
- •Writing down low points helps you release their weight
- •Ethan Kross: naming the negative creates distance from it
- 15:05 – 25:39
Using your camera roll to find patterns: busyness, self-care gaps, and relationship needs
Mel models the exercise by scrolling her own photos and naming themes rather than judging herself. She highlights how evidence reveals patterns like overwork, inconsistent health habits, and missing time with friends/family—insights you can plan from realistically.
- •Scan January onward; hold both low and high questions in mind
- •Reflection builds self-compassion and realism about what was possible
- •Mel’s themes: overwork, poor self-care, not enough friends, empty-nest shift
- •Tell the truth without self-shaming—matter-of-fact awareness fuels change
- 25:39 – 31:13
Question 2 — Capture the highs: small moments, relationships, and what you want more of
Mel shifts to highlights, emphasizing that highs aren’t just ‘big’ achievements. She shows how meaningful memories often come from people and small joys, and how reviewing them challenges negative narratives about your year.
- •Highs reveal what energizes you and what you’ll work for
- •Look for moments that made you smile or feel like yourself
- •The exercise can correct distorted self-talk (“I never see my parents”)
- •Gratitude and attention: the more you look for good, the more you see it
- 31:13 – 36:45
Claim your wins: career highs, community impact, and celebrating success
Mel encourages listeners to own and celebrate accomplishments, not minimize them. She shares major professional highlights—podcast growth, top-shared episodes, and the success of The Let Them Theory—and frames celebration as data about what matters.
- •Celebrate ‘once-in-a-lifetime’ and everyday wins alike
- •Recognition reinforces identity and future direction
- •Mel’s highlights: show rankings, audience community, book phenomenon, live tour
- •In-person connection as a standout source of energy and meaning
- 36:45 – 45:47
Question 3 — Turn highs and lows into lessons (your year is data)
Mel reframes experiences as information: what you like, need, and won’t tolerate. She shares her personal lessons—needing structure, prioritizing relationships, and being proud of specific habits—supported by research on regret and lifelong wellbeing.
- •Highs/lows aren’t just memories; they’re actionable data
- •Lessons: in-person connection matters; structure/routines improve performance
- •Relationships are central (Cornell Legacy Project; Harvard Adult Development Study)
- •Identify what you’re proud of and what to carry forward (walks, therapy, Let Them)
- 45:47 – 46:18
From reflection to strategy: the Stop–Start–Continue framework
Mel introduces the final three questions as a leadership strategy used by companies because it’s simple and effective. With your insights from the year, the framework becomes an easy way to convert reflection into a practical plan.
- •Stop/Start/Continue is a strategic planning tool
- •Lessons from the year make next steps obvious
- •This is where clarity becomes a real plan
- •The goal is deliberate change, not vague resolutions
- 46:18 – 52:20
Question 4 — What will you stop doing? Subtraction before addition
Mel argues that ‘winners quit’—not out of fear, but because priorities and values change. She offers examples of what to stop, from doomscrolling to self-criticism, and shares her own commitment to stop making excuses about resistance training.
- •Quitting can be strategic alignment, not failure
- •Cal Newport idea: real productivity = focus on what matters; subtract first
- •Stop patterns that drain energy: comparisons, over-availability, toxic relationships
- •Pick one ‘big stop’ to increase follow-through (Mel: excuses about strength training)
- 52:20 – 58:49
Question 5 — What will you continue doing? Keep what’s working and deepen it
Mel focuses on maintaining the habits and choices that made life better, without turning them into obligations. She shares specific continuations—exercise structure, proactive scheduling with friends, concerts, and learning to use AI—then prompts listeners to define theirs.
- •Continue actions that support wellbeing and relationships
- •Create a realistic routine (Mel’s 7-day plan including resistance training)
- •Be proactive: schedule friends/family in advance
- •Continue skill-building (AI) to stay current and save time for meaning
- 58:49 – 59:49
Question 6 — What will you start doing? Small starts, bold starts, and making it real
Mel invites you to choose beginnings that pull you toward a life that feels good, whether modest or ambitious. She emphasizes that writing it down transforms a vague desire into a concrete commitment and unlocks possibility.
- •A start doesn’t need to be dramatic—small changes compound
- •Examples: therapy, earlier bedtime, speaking up at work, dating, creative projects
- •Starting something new brings energy, learning, and growth
- •Writing down ‘start’ turns an idea into a real first step
- 59:49 – 1:12:23
Mel’s big ‘start’: launching Pure Genius and solving the protein gap
Mel announces a new company, Pure Genius, born from her struggle to get enough high-quality protein while traveling and from repeated expert advice on the podcast. She describes the product concept (a protein ‘shot’), her due diligence with Dr. Amy Shaw, and invites interest via a waitlist.
- •Problem: consistent, trustworthy protein intake is hard in a busy life
- •Inspiration from podcast experts (Amy Shaw, Gabrielle Lyon, Vonda Wright, Stacey Sims)
- •Solution: 3oz protein shot with 23g complete protein and amino acids
- •Co-founder story, lab visits, ingredient/taste iteration, and waitlist info
- 1:12:23 – 1:14:40
Wrap-up: why this ritual works, where to get the workbook, and encouragement to take the first step
Mel reinforces that the exercise creates clarity about who you are and what matters—and that repetition makes it more powerful each year. She closes with encouragement, a reminder about the free workbook, and an invitation to share the episode with others.
- •The six questions create a clear roadmap for the coming year
- •Reflection strengthens courage and commitment to meaningful change
- •Workbook reminder: melrobbins.com/bestyear
- •Share the exercise; support comes from doing it together
