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The Mel Robbins Podcast

What Are You Doing With Your Life? An 89 Year Old’s Best Advice for You

You are in for a treat today. You’re getting The Mel Robbins Podcast on the go! Last week, my mother-in-law, Judie, walked into our kitchen in Vermont and announced that she’s planning a big adventure, starting on her 90th birthday.

Mel RobbinshostJudie Robbinsguest

Nov 9, 202636mWatch on YouTube

Summaries, chapters, transcripts, and FAQs on this page are made by uListen, not YouTube.

CHAPTERS

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Chapter summaries

Walking interview setup: Judie’s “crazy decision” at age 89
Mel Robbins invites listeners on a walk with her husband and 89-year-old mother-in-law, Judie (“JJ”), who has exciting news. Mel frames the conversation as proof that you can make a big life change at any age.
- •Mel explains they’ll record a walking conversation with Judie, Chris, and the dogs
- •Judie has made a major decision about an adventure for the next year of her life
- •Mel sets up the theme: if Judie can change at 89, anyone can change at any age
The spark in New York: light show, a bar, and a bold Europe plan
Judie recounts a night in New York with her partner John that led to an unexpected vision. After seeing a light show at St. Patrick’s Cathedral and stopping for a drink, she proposes dropping everything to travel in Europe for a year.
- •Judie and John see “Luminaries” at St. Patrick’s Cathedral after dinner
- •At the St. Regis bar, Judie suggests they go away to Europe for a year
- •She imagines traveling simply—getting on trains and exploring places John hasn’t been
“Why wait?”: health, timing, and the shock of sudden loss
Judie explains why now is the moment: she and John are still in good shape and don’t need walking sticks. A recent sudden death in their circle reinforces her belief that there is no guarantee of tomorrow.
- •Judie notes many friends need walking sticks due to balance issues, but she and John are still strong
- •She argues they should take advantage of good health while they have it
- •A friend’s death in a car crash inspires the message: don’t wait to say ‘I love you’ or take the trip you want
When a comfortable routine becomes too small
Judie describes feeling tired of the privileged but repetitive rhythm of club dinners, bridge, and golf. She wants a different experience for what she calls the last stage of her life, including a return to London with a new kind of freedom.
- •Judie emphasizes she’s grateful, but bored with repeating the same routine
- •She wants to do something different in the last stage of life
- •She jokes about returning to London where she once lived—now returning “with my lover” and no children
Making a big change with a different kind of partner
Mel and Judie explore how John’s temperament contrasts with Judie’s spontaneity. Judie shares the practical and personality hurdles—John likes organization, his home, and routine, while she prefers books and adventure.
- •Judie says John is highly organized and a “news junkie,” while she prefers reading and escaping into books
- •John worries about his house and likes maintaining it
- •They joke about travel style differences: John resists the idea of a backpack; Judie’s willing to adapt
Time isn’t waiting: mixing things up right now
Judie underscores that any day could be the last time you do something ordinary, like walk a familiar loop. Mel expands the point: people wait for the right time due to kids, jobs, or obligations, but the most precious resource is time.
- •Judie says there’s no guarantee of tomorrow and urges action now
- •She pushes herself to walk even when it’s cold, as long as she’s able
- •Mel challenges common “not now” reasons and frames change as starting a new chapter immediately
Aging perspective: bridge, excuses, and the ‘just do it’ moment
Judie describes noticing how quickly life’s social structures can disappear, using her bridge club as an example. She connects this realization to Mel’s ‘5-4-3-2-1’ concept: the feeling of deciding and moving instead of waiting.
- •Judie looks around bridge night and thinks that in five years many won’t be there
- •She shares the instructor’s view that bridge is “a dying game” because younger generations aren’t picking it up
- •Judie equates her urgency with Mel’s ‘5-4-3-2-1’ moment: stop waiting and act
- •They discuss how people make excuses and delay changes until “tomorrow”
Planning the leap: John’s reaction and the memorial that sealed it
Judie recounts John’s disbelief when she proposes a year in Europe, and how she tries to persuade him with practical options. A memorial service—where ashes are placed into a river and the cousin’s story of ‘tomorrow’ never coming—deepens her resolve.
- •Judie proposes the idea directly; John responds that she’s out of her mind
- •She lists logistics: renting John’s house, handling the cat, and making it workable
- •Judie attends a memorial service where ashes are placed into the Battenkill River and people throw flowers
- •The cousin’s story about postponing coffee until the next morning reinforces the message: don’t wait
What it’s like to be 89: gratitude, purpose, and being an inspiration
Judie reflects on feeling fortunate to still be healthy and mentally sharp, even if slower. She cites Mel’s interview with Oprah as a catalyst for thinking about why she’s here, concluding she’s a connector and an inspiration—and that she must keep going.
- •Judie describes being healthy and mentally present as a major source of gratitude
- •She references Oprah’s message about figuring out why you’re here
- •Judie identifies herself as a connector and an inspiration, based on what people tell her
- •She says recognizing purpose doesn’t mean stopping; it means continuing to live it
Money, legacy, and the excuse of saving everything for the kids
Judie and Mel discuss how attitudes toward money shape willingness to pursue experiences. Judie notes many older people hesitate to spend savings because they want to leave money to their children, while Mel questions limiting life experiences for that reason.
- •Judie describes a family pattern of not worrying too much about money, while still saving and spending
- •Mel says thinking too much about money backfires for her, though she’s a saver
- •Judie observes older friends often resist spending because they want to leave money to their kids
- •Mel challenges the idea of robbing yourself of end-of-life experiences to preserve an inheritance
How to stay interesting: be curious, stop talking aches and pains, seek new experiences
Judie shares a line she once told Chris: if you’re not interested, you won’t be interesting. She argues that people become boring as they age when they only retell old stories or focus on ailments, and that new experiences keep you engaged and engaging.
- •Judie repeats her principle: curiosity about others makes you interesting
- •She claims many people avoid older people because they can be boring and repetitive
- •She urges focusing less on aches and pains and more on experiences
- •Mel ties it back to growth: shaking up life keeps it interesting and creates stories worth sharing
Practical takeaway: boredom is a signal, and you’re not stuck
Mel reframes Judie’s story for listeners who may not have the means to travel. The key is noticing when life feels too routine and deciding to change something—once you decide, the mind shifts from excuses to possibilities.
- •Mel suggests asking: has your routine become too routine—are you bored of your own life?
- •She says boredom can signal it’s time to start a new chapter, even without major travel
- •Mel describes the mental shift from “excuses” to “possibility” once you commit
- •They emphasize you’re not stuck—where you live, how you live, or even in a new choice
Closing mantra on the walk: live in the present, don’t wait, begin the chapter
As they catch their breath, Judie shares a saying about the present being a gift and urges living in the moment. The conversation ends with simple parting words: don’t wait—make the call, start the chapter, do the thing now.
- •Judie quotes: the past is history, the future a mystery, the present is a gift
- •Judie’s final message: don’t wait—call the friend today
- •Mel echoes: if you want a chapter, begin it
- •Mel closes by encouraging listeners to choose an interesting, adventurous life rather than waiting

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