Modern WisdomCristoph | Mental Health As An International DJ | Modern Wisdom Podcast 111
CHAPTERS
- 0:00 – 1:03
The hidden cost of DJ success: loneliness, jet lag, and dark thoughts
Cristoph opens with a candid look at the non-glamorous side of touring—sleep deprivation, isolation, and the mental strain that can spiral quickly. He shares a frightening moment where intrusive thoughts emerged after days without sleep, signaling that something was seriously wrong.
- •Touring isn’t “glamour”—it can erode your mental stability
- •Struggling to readjust to normal life after returning home
- •Severe sleep deprivation leading to intrusive, dangerous thoughts
- •Early framing of mental health as a central theme of the episode
- 1:03 – 4:34
Constant travel and what “slowing down” really feels like
Chris and Cristoph discuss the relentless logistics of international touring and how downtime can feel oddly uncomfortable. Cristoph explains how adrenaline carries him through long runs of shows, but the crash hits hard once he’s home—jet lag, illness, boredom, and restlessness.
- •Non-stop routing across continents and the difficulty of switching off
- •Adrenaline and responsibility to deliver energy for paying crowds
- •Post-tour consequences: jet lag, flu-like sickness, exhaustion
- •Downtime creates boredom and a pull back toward the road and studio
- 4:34 – 7:25
Fear of flying, anxiety, and the “unnatural” reality of life in the air
Cristoph recounts his former fear of flying and how repetition turned it into a necessity rather than a comfort. They explore how frequent flying is physically unnatural and psychologically taxing, even for people who do it constantly.
- •Using alcohol in the past to cope with flight anxiety
- •Ongoing inner dialogue during turbulence and long-haul flights
- •Doctor’s warning about the abnormality of constant air travel
- •Accepting flying as a job requirement to pursue ambitions
- 7:25 – 9:14
Origin story: Newcastle roots, loss, and learning to produce without instruments
Cristoph explains how DJing ran in his family and how a friend’s sudden death became a wake-up call to pursue music seriously. He describes teaching himself production (despite not playing instruments) and building tracks by instinct and dancefloor experience.
- •Family background in DJing and early identity as a DJ
- •A friend’s death triggers urgency and commitment to goals
- •Learning production via Ableton/piano roll rather than instruments
- •Designing music around what works at specific moments in the night
- 9:14 – 11:35
Building a foundation: long sets, crowd reading, and standing out in a competitive scene
The conversation shifts to the ‘apprenticeship’ years—five-to-six-hour club sets and constant experimentation. Cristoph explains how those brutal shifts trained him to read rooms, develop a distinct sound, and compete when trends shifted in Newcastle.
- •Long-form DJ sets as skill-building for pacing and crowd psychology
- •Doing “homework” to differentiate from other DJs
- •Responding to changing trends (funky house surge) by making bootlegs/mashups
- •Early local gigs as “baptism of fire” for later big-stage confidence
- 11:35 – 16:37
Career strategy and not compromising: the Ibiza walk-off story
Chris tells a famous story where Cristoph refused to change his warmup direction in Ibiza and walked out rather than compromise. Cristoph explains the long-game thinking behind it—protecting relationships with headliners and preserving his reputation and role as a proper warmup DJ.
- •Pressure from promoters to raise BPM and “go harder” immediately
- •Refusing to sacrifice the warmup function and long-term credibility
- •Thinking about future relationships with headliners and industry gatekeepers
- •Belief in self and career trajectory, even when it costs short-term wins
- 16:37 – 20:36
The breakthrough with Eric Prydz: ‘Katzie’, sacrifice, and going 0 to 100
Cristoph shares the pivotal sequence of events that connected him to Eric Prydz—Eric playing ‘Katzie’, a canceled U.S. show, and a last-minute warmup opportunity in LA. Taking financial risk to seize the moment led to major career acceleration and deeper collaboration.
- •Eric Prydz discovers and plays Cristoph’s track on his show
- •Opportunity arises due to circumstances around a charity show in LA
- •Cristoph pays his own way to warm up for his hero—betting on himself
- •Rapid escalation: Epic 5 booking and long-term professional relationship
- 20:36 – 28:14
From fanboy to friend: touring with Prydz and the surrealness of mentorship
They explore how it feels to go from idolizing an artist to being in regular contact and touring together. Cristoph describes the lingering butterflies when Prydz texts and shares humorous stories from Sweden gigs and life on the road with him.
- •Intense fandom history (Creamfields pilgrimage just to see Prydz)
- •Still feeling nerves and disbelief when contacted by his hero
- •Touring together turns the relationship into genuine friendship
- •Anecdotes from Sweden: unusual venues, afterparties, and shared banter
- 28:14 – 31:27
Sound and emotion: balancing drive with melody and creating memorable moments
Cristoph explains his musical philosophy—bridging driving energy for peak-time sets with melodic emotion that audiences remember. He and Chris discuss tracks that create emotional crowd reactions and why melody and breakdowns matter in club experiences.
- •Bridging tech-driven energy with progressive/melodic emotion
- •Avoiding ‘floaty’ prog at peak time while still capturing euphoria
- •Crowd memory: people remember melodies and breakdowns, not repetitive drops
- •Examples of emotional records and standout live moments (e.g., engagements)
- 31:27 – 37:38
Tour manager realities: logistics, trust, and the mental impact of traveling alone
Cristoph breaks down what tour managers actually do and why he hasn’t had one—until recently feeling the need for company. He describes how traveling alone amplifies self-consciousness, avoidance behaviors, and the tendency to isolate in hotel rooms.
- •Tour manager duties: travel, hotels, promoter liaison, and setup support
- •Trust and lifestyle fit are essential because you live in each other’s pockets
- •Solo travel intensifies anxiety and self-consciousness in public spaces
- •Isolation spiral: room service, staying inside, and repetitive airport/hotel loops
- 37:38 – 39:41
Avicii and the broader mental health conversation in DJ culture
Using Avicii’s death as context, they discuss mental health pressures unique to touring—extreme highs followed by lonely crashes, substance availability, and burnout. Cristoph emphasizes that the issue isn’t just in DJing but reflects wider human needs for stability and connection.
- •Avicii as a catalyst for mental health awareness in the industry
- •Touring creates emotional peaks/troughs and post-show loneliness
- •Role of alcohol/drugs and comedowns in destabilizing mood
- •Mental health as universal: humans require connection, meaning, and routine
- 39:41 – 48:41
Cristoph’s crisis: sleep deprivation, compulsive behavior, voices, and getting help
Cristoph recounts a severe episode after touring where insomnia and jet lag pushed him toward delusional behavior and intrusive thoughts. He sought support from family and doctors, used medication temporarily, and learned coping strategies for managing sleep and time zones.
- •Days without sleep leading to erratic purchases and bizarre late-night actions
- •Intrusive thoughts while driving—realizing something was wrong
- •Medical explanation: sleep deprivation causing delusion-like symptoms
- •Short-term medication and learning to ‘sleep when you can’ as a touring skill
- 48:41 – 54:27
Social media is a highlight reel: envy, distorted comparisons, and ‘fame’ misconceptions
Cristoph rejects the idea of ‘fame’ and explains how social media misrepresents what touring life looks like day-to-day. Chris adds the idea that we see others’ curated best moments while experiencing our own messy reality, which fuels insecurity and dissatisfaction.
- •Instagram/Twitter portrayals hide boredom, loneliness, and downtime realities
- •The asymmetry of comparison: others’ highlights vs. our full experience
- •Reframing ‘success’ as being lucky to do meaningful work, not being famous
- •Encouraging friends to change jobs/relationships rather than accept unhappiness
- 54:27 – 1:05:38
Finding balance: routines, gym, moderation, and managing nerves on stage
Cristoph outlines what helps him stay stable—exercise, eating well, and structured recovery between tours. He also admits he uses alcohol as ‘Dutch courage’ due to intense performance nerves, including physical symptoms like shaking and vomiting before sets.
- •Routine as the antidote: gym, nutrition, and reset periods between tours
- •Moderation and strategic breaks (some DJs go teetotal temporarily)
- •Performance anxiety: needing a drink to cope with nerves in the booth
- •Recognizing early warning signs and building sustainable habits
- 1:05:38 – 1:21:30
Travel survival and creative life: lounges, plane habits, Netflix inspiration, and future plans
They close by discussing practical travel comforts, how Cristoph kills time on flights, and where he prefers to produce music. The episode ends with his upcoming touring schedule, release strategy (singles vs EPs/albums), and where fans can follow his work.
- •Airport/flight coping: lounges, seating choices, games, and comfort upgrades
- •Producing more in hotel rooms than on cramped flights; media as creative fuel
- •Near-term touring schedule across multiple regions and major events
- •Release approach: singles performance vs conceptual projects; label ambitions
