JOHN ASSARAF | Understand Your Emotions & Take Control Of Your Life | Modern Wisdom Podcast 143

There are 50 different types of fears that hold most people back, but there's a common seven or so. So fear of failure, fear of succeeding and failing, fear of trying my best and disappointing myself or others, fear of being embarrassed, ashamed, ridiculed, or judged. All of these fears have to do with our self-image, self-esteem, and self-worth, and what will I think of me or what will others think of me if I don't succeed or if I do and fail? So fears are naturally occurring phenomenons in our subconscious mind as a safety and protective mechanism to keep us away from any danger or real or imagined pain or suffering. And so, it's just an automatic trigger in the subconscious mind. Now, the problem is not fear. The problem is that most people don't understand that fear, it's just a signal. It's a highly sensitive signal and mechanism in the brain, but the ramifications of not understanding what fear does is the problem.

(wave crashes) John Assaraf in the building. How are you, man?

In the building, here I am-

(laughs)

... doing great. We're- we're- we're par- we're separated by sea, but we're all connected, right?

That's- that's absolutely true. Uh, I'm super, super excited to speak to you today. So-

Thank you.

... people might have seen you on The Secret or know you as bestselling author or, you know, endlessly successful entrepreneur with multiple projects and stuff like that. Do you think that you were naturally gifted to be successful in this many domains? Is this kind of what you thought you were going to end up doing when you were younger?

(laughs) No. I- I was voted most likely to fail in life, uh, by my grade 11 students and my, uh, my basketball team that I- I excelled in basketball when I was a kid, ever thought I was gonna be a, you know, a jock, uh, you know, uh, an athlete of some sort. They- they used to say, you know, "He- he- he's brilliant on the basketball court, but he's dumber than a doorknob in the classroom."

(laughs)

And so (laughs) I- I, um, I- I never thought I would be doing what I do today. I never believed that I could. I thought I was way too dumb. Uh, I was- I was hungry, but I was- I just felt like I wasn't as smart as the other kids. Um, me and my, uh, I- I grew up in a family with, you know, hardworking parents who wanted to put food on the table for their kids. We lived in moderate, moderate, moderate, um, you know, means. Um, you know, it's, I had a bedroom with my brother. My sister had a bedroom. Um, we had an apartment. Uh, there was always arguments and fights around the lack of money. My father was a gambler and an, uh, alcoholic, uh, I believe. Uh, he hasn't drank in probably 50 years, but, uh, so a lot of struggles. And, um, and then, um, I- I- we- I didn't have the environment that really fostered me even thinking about achieving success until I had one chance encounter with one man when I was 19 years old, who asked me one question, and the answer to that question changed my life. Uh, but up until the age of 19, I thought I was, you know, gonna work in a factory, making minimum wage, living in an average place. I was struggling for money, uh, struggling to make a great life for myself. The only great life that I ever had in my imagination was from watching television.