Skip to content
Good Inside with Dr. BeckyGood Inside with Dr. Becky

How to Stop Being a People Pleaser

It’s hard to say no. Really hard. If you were raised to be a “good kid,” to be agreeable, to make other people happy… well, then it makes complete sense that it’s hard for you to prioritize yourself as an adult. Here’s the good news: This “people pleasing” trait isn’t all of you. It’s just part of you. And as a recovering people pleaser herself, Dr. Becky knows exactly how to connect with this part while strengthening other parts of yourself—so that you can set healthy boundaries, respond to pushback, and reduce guilt. Even better: This episode’s scripts and strategies won’t only help you stop the people pleasing cycle for yourself, but also for the next generation. Let’s model how to honor our own needs while staying connected to others, so our kids can do the same. Join Good Inside Membership: http://www.goodinside.com Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter Want More? Check these out: Eve Rodsky on How to Stop "Doing It All" - https://youtu.be/WdeiM4Jgw9I Motherhood Doesn’t Have to Be Martyrdom - https://youtu.be/ywJMtRHzqFY Why Won't My Kids Listen To Anything I Say? - https://youtu.be/Rb7FSL1y3Oo Deeply Feeling Kids Need a Different Approach - https://youtu.be/WQNM5EyDtKE Yes, One-Year-Olds Have Tantrums - https://youtu.be/yE2To4sOHG8

Dr. Beckyhost
May 24, 202231mWatch on YouTube ↗

Episode Details

EPISODE INFO

Released
May 24, 2022
Duration
31m
Channel
Good Inside with Dr. Becky
Watch on YouTube
▶ Open ↗

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

It’s hard to say no. Really hard. If you were raised to be a “good kid,” to be agreeable, to make other people happy… well, then it makes complete sense that it’s hard for you to prioritize yourself as an adult. Here’s the good news: This “people pleasing” trait isn’t all of you. It’s just part of you. And as a recovering people pleaser herself, Dr. Becky knows exactly how to connect with this part while strengthening other parts of yourself—so that you can set healthy boundaries, respond to pushback, and reduce guilt. Even better: This episode’s scripts and strategies won’t only help you stop the people pleasing cycle for yourself, but also for the next generation. Let’s model how to honor our own needs while staying connected to others, so our kids can do the same. Join Good Inside Membership: http://www.goodinside.com Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter Want More? Check these out: Eve Rodsky on How to Stop "Doing It All" - https://youtu.be/WdeiM4Jgw9I Motherhood Doesn’t Have to Be Martyrdom - https://youtu.be/ywJMtRHzqFY Why Won't My Kids Listen To Anything I Say? - https://youtu.be/Rb7FSL1y3Oo Deeply Feeling Kids Need a Different Approach - https://youtu.be/WQNM5EyDtKE Yes, One-Year-Olds Have Tantrums - https://youtu.be/yE2To4sOHG8

SPEAKERS

  • Dr. Becky

    host

    Clinical psychologist and parenting expert; host of Good Inside.

EPISODE SUMMARY

In this episode of Good Inside with Dr. Becky, featuring Dr. Becky, How to Stop Being a People Pleaser explores rewire people-pleasing by separating needs, tolerating disappointment, parenting differently People-pleasing is framed as a protective “part” learned early (often through “good girl” conditioning) that prioritizes others’ wants over one’s own and is hard to rewire because it once supported safety and attachment.

RELATED EPISODES

When Depression Doesn't Look Like Depression | Dr. Becky and Dr. Chris Choukalas

When Depression Doesn't Look Like Depression | Dr. Becky and Dr. Chris Choukalas

Walking on Eggshells With Your ADHD Tween? Here’s What May Be Happening Underneath

Walking on Eggshells With Your ADHD Tween? Here’s What May Be Happening Underneath

AI, Kids, and the Skills We Can’t Afford to Lose

AI, Kids, and the Skills We Can’t Afford to Lose

How to Set a Curfew — Brought To You by Life360

How to Set a Curfew — Brought To You by Life360

Coming Soon

Coming Soon

Talking About Peer Pressure with Your Teen — Brought To You by Life360

Talking About Peer Pressure with Your Teen — Brought To You by Life360

Get more out of YouTube videos.

High quality summaries for YouTube videos. Accurate transcripts to search & find moments. Powered by ChatGPT & Claude AI.