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Good Inside with Dr. BeckyI Thought I’d Thrive as a New Mom — Here’s What Actually Happened
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At a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
New motherhood’s boredom: why it happens and how to cope
- Myleik describes expecting to “crush” new motherhood with planning and efficiency, only to feel bored, joyless, and trapped in repetitive newborn tasks.
- They unpack how the newborn stage can strip away novelty, autonomy, and social connection, creating a double hit of more monotony and fewer energizing outlets.
- A central theme is that the hardest part is often the “layers” added to boredom—shame, comparison, and the belief that good parents shouldn’t feel this way.
- They reframe good parenting as tolerating hard feelings rather than solving them, and emphasize boredom is not a report card on love or future parenting quality.
- Myleik shares that parenting became more enjoyable as her kids got older and life regained novelty, feedback, and easier “idea-to-action” execution.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasBoredom in the newborn stage is common and meaningful—not shameful.
Repetitive care tasks can feel mind-numbing, especially when contrasted with a previously novelty-rich life; boredom doesn’t mean you don’t love your baby or regret parenthood.
The “double whammy” is real: fewer energizing inputs plus more monotonous demands.
New parents often lose travel, spontaneity, and social time while simultaneously gaining constant repetitive chores—making boredom and low mood more likely.
Your suffering often comes from the story you tell about the feeling.
The raw feeling (“this is boring”) is hard, but adding self-criticism (“good parents don’t feel this”) and comparison intensifies distress and isolation.
Trying to ‘strategize’ your way out of boredom can backfire.
For efficiency-oriented, high-achieving people, treating boredom as a problem to solve can create pressure to feel differently; the more helpful move is practicing tolerance and self-compassion.
Boredom is not a predictor of the kind of parent you’ll be.
Dr. Becky emphasizes that hard thoughts aren’t characterological; they don’t forecast poor attachment, lack of love, or future parenting failure.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesI very quickly realized I am not enjoying this at all.
— Myleik Teele
There's no book that says, "Here's something for you when it's not enjoyable or when you feel really bored."
— Myleik Teele
It seemed like, it felt like in the moment, like, my life's going to be this way forever.
— Myleik Teele
Doing a good job as a new parent is not making the hard easy. It's actually just talking ourselves through staying in the hard, right?
— Dr. Becky
It's okay if you aren't enjoying this. It's okay. This is boring, and it's hard, and this is not a, this is not a time for you to try to strategize yourself out of the feeling.
— Myleik Teele
SPEAKERS
Dr. Becky
hostClinical psychologist and parenting expert, host of the Good Inside with Dr. Becky podcast.
Myleik Teele
guestEntrepreneur and founder of Curlbox, sharing personal experiences of early motherhood.
High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.
