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Lewis HowesSTOP DOING These Things If You Want To FIND LOVE TODAY |DeVon Franklin & Lewis Howes
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WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
DeVon Franklin on Love, Lust, Truth, and Dating With Intention
- DeVon Franklin says a war between love and lust sits inside every man, and that men are conditioned to feed lust, which makes commitment to one woman hard without practiced discipline.
- He argues that honesty and dating with intention are essential: men should tell a partner early when they lack peace, and women should get out of the gray area by asking clear, direct questions.
- Franklin says suppressed emotions and wounds, including his own grief over losing his father at age nine, drive men toward vice and achievement as ways to prove their worth, and that healing has to happen internally.
- He describes marriage as the constant negotiation of two different people, and recommends small daily habits like starting the day in love and staying plugged into a partner's life.
- He tells women to observe before trusting a man, hold onto their power, and leave a man unwilling to do his own work rather than lower their standards.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasLust is fed by culture, while love must be deliberately cultivated.
Franklin says men are taught that more women is better, so appetite grows without discipline, and marriage does not automatically supply the discipline that was never practiced.
Peace is the best barometer of whether a relationship is right.
Franklin calls inner peace a compass for telling love from lust, and says that when it is missing, a man should tell his partner the truth as soon as possible rather than let her invest more emotionally.
Dating with intention means being transparent about where you are.
He says that if a man still wants to explore, he should let women know his intentions so they can decide as adults whether to engage, and he calls multiple undisclosed partners part-time manipulation.
Women should observe before giving trust and get out of the gray area.
Franklin advises an observation period, using the analogy of not giving a phone passcode after a month but giving one's body, and he urges women to ask direct questions about exclusivity and plans.
Suppression gives pain power, and external achievement cannot heal an internal wound.
Franklin says he drove himself to prove his worth after losing his father, and that healing came from acknowledging the feeling, asking where it comes from, and valuing being over doing.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesif you don't trust him enough to give him the code to your phone, why would you give him your body?
— DeVon Franklin
Because I believe our vulnerability leads to our victory, not the opposite way.
— DeVon Franklin
anything we suppress, uh, we empower. We empower it to destroy us.
— DeVon Franklin
I would say, uh, love will, love works, and love wins. That's what I would say. Love will always find a way, love absolutely works, and at the end of the day, love will win.
— DeVon Franklin
when I'm really in the presence of greatness, I'm absolutely in the presence of humility.
— DeVon Franklin
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SPEAKERS
DeVon Franklin
guestProducer, author, and motivational speaker focused on faith, relationships, and personal development.
Lewis Howes
hostHost of The School of Greatness podcast and author focused on self-improvement and high performance.
High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.
