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Lewis HowesWHY SUCCESS Comes From MASTERING Your DARK SIDE | Robert Greene & Lewis Howes
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Chapter summaries
Greeting Robert Greene, the First Guest
Lewis Howes welcomes Robert Greene back and recalls that Greene was guest on episode one of the show, now past 1,000 episodes. They trade compliments about their different strengths in observing human behavior.
- •Greene was the first guest on The School of Greatness almost eight years ago
- •The show now has over 1,000 episodes and 250 million downloads
- •Greene was named the number one moment of the 1,000-episode retrospective
- •Howes says Greene researches history while he reads people and body language
Surviving the Stroke and Drawing on His Books
Howes asks what Greene learned from the stroke that nearly killed him. Greene describes the daily struggle of recovery, his determination, and how The 50th Law, Mastery and The Laws of Human Nature each help him cope. He also reflects on mortality and being given a second lease.
- •Greene refused to give in to hopelessness and wanted to write another book
- •Recovery is a daily battle involving therapy, exercise and a recumbent bike
- •The 50th Law helps with fear, Mastery with repetition, and Human Nature with controlling anger and impatience
- •The second anniversary of the stroke made him think it could have been the anniversary of his death
- •He tries to transmute negative experiences into positive ones, an idea he links to amor fati
Attitude as a Lens and Turning Obstacles into Opportunity
Asked how to transform when everything seems negative, Greene points to the chapter on attitude in The Laws of Human Nature. He argues your outlook shapes both how people react to you and how you experience hardship such as COVID, and he applies this to his own stroke.
- •Attitude works like a camera lens, and a negative one crystallizes over time
- •Your initial attitude shapes how others respond to you
- •COVID can be seen as an opportunity to rethink life and goals
- •Greene recommends Ryan Holiday's The Obstacle Is The Way
- •The stroke has been a blessing in some ways and motivates him on his seventh book
Why Failure Teaches More Than Success
Howes asks how great figures from history rebound from tragedy. Greene cites Lincoln and Churchill, argues that defeat is the greatest thing that can happen to you, and tells the story of his first rejected draft of The 50th Law. He uses Napoleon to show how success breeds grandiosity and conservatism.
- •Lincoln and Churchill both suffered major setbacks and recovered
- •Success makes people stop learning and surround themselves with flatterers
- •Greene's first draft of The 50th Law was dropped and rewritten in eight months
- •Napoleon's decade of success was followed by failures as it went to his head
- •Success makes you conservative, while great things come from openness and change
Questions to Ask After a Loss and Being Future-Oriented
Greene offers questions to ask after tragedy: could it have been worse, and what can I learn from this. He stresses staying future-oriented rather than obsessed with the past. Howes shares how he told himself to have hindsight now after a breakup.
- •Ask whether it could have been worse and what the worst scenario would have been
- •Ask what lesson you can learn, such as what you want from a relationship
- •Being enmeshed in the moment makes things seem larger than they are
- •Successful people tend to be oriented toward the future, like a next man up mentality
- •It is okay to be depressed for a while after a setback
Emotions, the Rider and the Horse
Howes asks about expressing emotions. Greene says repressing emotions has a price, citing Carl Jung, but constantly emoting shows weakness. He uses the rider and horse metaphor for balance and describes handling his own anger.
- •Repressed emotions come out in uncontrollable ways
- •Constantly emoting makes you look weak and lacking self-control
- •The rational rider must guide the emotional horse without holding the reins too tightly or too loosely
- •Before reacting, ask why you are angry and whether you will feel it in three weeks
- •Anger can be redirected into work like writing a book or a social cause
Never Outshine the Master and Getting Fired
Asked for his favorite law before the stroke, Greene names law one of The 48 Laws of Power, never outshine the master, and explains how he was fired from a research job. Howes shares his own firing story, and Greene explains that bosses carry hidden insecurities and that people hide their real motives.
- •Greene was the top researcher on a TV show but was fired, he later realized for outshining his boss
- •Howes was fired from a grounds crew job at 13 after a fist fight
- •Everyone has an ego and insecurities, and bosses often more than others
- •People give cover stories, so you often don't know why you were treated badly
- •This confusion is why Greene wrote The Laws of Human Nature
Assume Formlessness, Mastery, and Choosing Challenges
Greene says his current favorite is law 48, assume formlessness, which helps him stay mentally fluid after the stroke. Howes questions how this fits with mastery, and Greene explains formlessness comes after years of discipline. They discuss exploring paths early in a career and picking challenges slightly above your skill level.
- •Assume formlessness means adapting fluidly, a law drawn from military thinking
- •Musashi could be formless only after 20 years of life and death fights
- •Early career paths should be neither too rigid nor too scattered
- •Greene found his calling at 36 or 37 after trying eight forms of writing
- •Choose projects slightly above your current skill level
Confronting Your Dark Side and Channeling Anger
Greene's favorite chapter in The Laws of Human Nature is about the shadow. He explains how repression creates destructive outbursts, and how he channeled anger from Hollywood into The 48 Laws of Power. They discuss Kobe Bryant, LeBron James and Martin Luther King as examples of channeling dark energy into higher purposes.
- •The dark side comes from childhood impulses we repress to be good social animals
- •Repressed emotions can erupt as addiction or anger issues
- •Greene's anger at Hollywood fueled his first book, aimed at helping others
- •Great athletes like Kobe Bryant and LeBron James channel competitive anger
- •Working for a cause greater than yourself keeps you from being a prisoner of anger
The Law of the Sublime and Living in the Imagination
Greene describes his next book, The Law of the Sublime, motivated by his frustration that people live in narrow, banal worlds. He explains the meaning of sublime as approaching the threshold of death, and how the stroke made death a felt experience. Because he can't travel, he must live the book through imagination.
- •The book aims to reanimate the soul and open the mind to the wonder of being alive
- •Sublime relates to going right up to the limit, with death as the main threshold
- •Greene wrote the death chapter of Human Nature just before his stroke and found death was a feeling, not an idea
- •He planned adventures for the book but now must imagine them
- •Imagination helps people see that things don't have to stay as they are
Historical Heroes: Machiavelli, Da Vinci and Cleopatra
Howes asks whom Greene finds most inspiring from his research. Greene names Machiavelli for his realism and Renaissance range, Leonardo da Vinci for being far ahead of his time, and Cleopatra for her intelligence and theatrical seduction.
- •Machiavelli inspired The 48 Laws and appealed to Greene for his honesty
- •Machiavelli also wrote The Discourses and the comedy Mandragola
- •Da Vinci drew tanks and flying machines and showed empathy for animals
- •Cleopatra was smart, well-read and seduced Mark Antony with spectacle
Getting Inside Other People's Minds
Asked which skill 20-somethings should master, Greene says it is getting inside the minds of others. He advises treating other people as more interesting than yourself, listening to subtext, and drawing people out subtly about their childhood.
- •Understanding others' minds is the skill that makes the sky the limit
- •Switch from self-absorption to treating others as fascinating characters
- •Understanding people stops you from taking their behavior personally
- •Ask subtle questions, often about childhood, and let them do most of the talking
- •Mirroring is a slightly manipulative but powerful connector
Preparation, Doubt, and Exposing Yourself to Fear
Howes asks how to avoid insecurity around higher-status people and how to handle self-doubt. Greene says preparation removes most doubt, using Hitchcock, and that you must take the first step and face fears, citing his own claustrophobia. Both stress experiencing fear directly and not wasting your potential.
- •Doing your homework removes about 80% of nervousness, and a little tension is useful
- •Hitchcock stayed calm because he prepared every detail beforehand
- •Avoiding a fear never overcomes it, as with Greene's claustrophobia after a theater fire
- •Howes recommends listing fears and facing the top one repeatedly, as he did with public speaking
- •Not trying leads to the worst feeling of all, wasting your potential
Greene's Lingering Fear, the Zeitgeist, and Closing
Greene admits he still has a tremendous fear of failure that keeps him motivated. Asked what people don't ask him, he discusses the current zeitgeist, predicting a revolutionary generation and urging people to embrace change. Howes closes with where to find Greene's work.
- •Greene still fears failing his readers with each new book
- •Young people drive cultural change and structures have been static for decades
- •Greene predicts a revolutionary generation following the crisis generation
- •He urges embracing change and the new opportunities it creates
- •Greene's website is PowerSeductionAndWar.com
