The Mel Robbins Podcast

How To Make Your Life Exciting Again | Mel Robbins

Order your copy of The Let Them Theory 👉 https://melrob.co/let-them-theory 👈 The #1 Best Selling Book of 2025 🔥 Discover how much power you truly have. It all begins with two simple words. Let Them. — New research shows that your work, your life, and your relationships will get boring. Today, you’ll learn a simple tool you can use to make your life exciting, joyful, and energizing again. This profound conversation will allow you to truly understand and connect the dots between why you've become bored with what used to excite you – and how you can create more meaning in your life. In this episode, Mel is joined by the renowned neuroscientist from University College London and MIT, Dr. Tali Sharot. She is here to teach you the groundbreaking science and research about how you can start feeling excitement about your life again. Dr. Sharot is a behavioral neuroscientist and the director of the Affective Brain Lab at University College London. Her research integrates neuroscience, behavioral economics, and psychology to study how emotion and behavior influences people's beliefs and decisions. After today, you will know how to use Dr. Sharot’s research to make your life sparkle again and reignite happiness in your day-to-day life. You’ll also learn very specific, tactical things you can do to make your vacations better, avoid a midlife crisis, and improve the experience of your everyday life. By the time you finish listening, you’ll know EXACTLY what to do to create any change you want. Dr. Tali’s website: https://affectivebrain.com For more resources, including links to Dr. Tali’s book, website, and social media platforms, click here for the podcast episode page: https://www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/episode-193 Follow The Mel Robbins Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themelrobbinspodcast I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode. In this episode: 00:00 Intro 01:42: The spontaneous adventure Mel went on last night. 02:35: Do you feel like your life has gotten boring? 04:47: The research-backed reason why life is getting so boring. 06:52: What ‘habituation’ is and how it impacts every aspect of your life. 08:04: Why change is foundational for happiness and joy. 10:53: How long should your vacation be for ultimate happiness? 12:04: Why the anticipation of good things is what actually makes you happy. 13:51: 2 ways to hack happiness and feel better starting today. 15:02: Why do you feel like you are outgrowing your romantic relationship? 16:34: Why 'taking space’ in your relationship is an essential action to take. 18:02: Do this exercise with Mel to better understand habituation. 19:22: The surprising situation you will find your partner the most attractive in. 21:18: What is happening in your brain when you experience something new. 23:30: Next time you feel bored and burned out, take a break. 24:45: A simple mindfulness exercise to find gratitude for what you have. 26:05: Based on neuroscience, this is how habituation is impacting your sex life. 29:34: Why, between ages 40 and 60, you will be the unhappiest. 32:30: If you hate your job, try THIS before you quit. 34:45: The one action you need to take today to find peace. — Follow Mel: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melrobbins/ TikTok: http://tiktok.com/@melrobbins Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/melrobbins LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melrobbins Website: http://melrobbins.com — Sign up for Mel’s newsletter: https://melrob.co/sign-up-newsletter A note from Mel to you, twice a week, sharing simple, practical ways to build the life you want. — Subscribe to Mel’s channel here: https://www.youtube.com/melrobbins?sub_confirmation=1 — Listen to The Mel Robbins Podcast 🎧 New episodes drop every Monday & Thursday! https://melrob.co/spotify https://melrob.co/applepodcasts https://melrob.co/amazonmusic — Looking for Mel’s books on Amazon? Find them here: The Let Them Theory: https://amzn.to/3IQ21Oe The Let Them Theory Audiobook: https://amzn.to/413SObp The High 5 Habit: https://amzn.to/3fMvfPQ The 5 Second Rule: https://amzn.to/4l54fah

Mel RobbinshostDr. Tali Sharotguest

Jul 18, 202438mWatch on YouTube ↗

WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT

Beat Midlife Boredom: Use Neuroscience Of Habituation To Reignite Joy

Mel Robbins interviews neuroscientist Dr. Tali Sharot about habituation—the brain’s tendency to respond less to anything constant or repeated—and how it quietly makes life, work, and relationships feel dull over time.
Sharot explains that while habituation protects us from constant overload and softens painful experiences, it also numbs us to the good things we already have, reducing daily happiness unless we deliberately inject change and novelty.
They discuss research on vacations, relationships, midlife dissatisfaction, and workplace creativity, showing that small breaks, new experiences, and anticipation significantly boost joy and motivation.
The episode closes with a call to run “experiments in living” by systematically trying (and sometimes removing) things in your life to discover what genuinely increases your well-being.

IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING

5 ideas

Your brain will always normalize the familiar, so you must add change on purpose.

Habituation means even great relationships, homes, and jobs stop feeling exciting simply because your brain stops responding strongly to what’s constant; you can’t rely on circumstances alone to feel happy—you have to periodically introduce something new.

Use short, varied experiences instead of rare, long ones to maximize joy.

Sharot’s vacation research shows people peak in happiness about 43 hours into a trip and are happiest of all the day before it starts; more frequent short breaks and weekends away create more “firsts,” more peaks, and more anticipation-driven happiness.

Intentionally create “anticipatory events” to feel happier right now.

Scheduling things you look forward to—a class, a hike, a special date, a future trip—boosts current mood because the brain derives substantial pleasure from anticipating positive experiences, often more than from the event itself.

Re-spark appreciation for what you have through breaks or mental subtraction.

Physically stepping away (a trip, a few days away, a change of routine) or briefly imagining life without your partner, home, or job can “dishabituate” your brain, making old blessings feel vivid and valuable again.

Inject novelty and variety into routines to keep life and relationships alive.

Trying new routes, learning new skills, seeing your partner in new contexts, talking to different kinds of people, or altering your environment interrupts habituation, increases learning, and contributes to a more “psychologically rich” life.

WORDS WORTH SAVING

5 quotes

Maybe life isn’t boring. Maybe you’ve gotten boring.

— Mel Robbins

Our brain is like the front page of a newspaper—it cares about what’s new.

— Dr. Tali Sharot

Because of habituation, we might have great things in our life, but they don’t elicit as much joy on a daily basis as you’d expect.

— Dr. Tali Sharot

When you stare at your spouse or your work or your life for too long, it goes gray.

— Mel Robbins

You don’t really know what’s good for your life without doing experiments—just like in science.

— Dr. Tali Sharot

Neuroscience of habituation and how the brain adapts to constant stimuliImpact of habituation on happiness, relationships, and midlife satisfactionThe power of novelty, change, and learning in boosting joyVacation research: first experiences, 43-hour peak, and anticipation effectsDishabituation through breaks, perspective shifts, and varietyPractical strategies to re-spark relationships, daily life, and work“Experiments in living” as a framework for intentional life changes

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