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JOHN ASSARAF | Understand Your Emotions & Take Control Of Your Life | Modern Wisdom Podcast 143

John Assaraf is an author, entrepreneur and mindset expert. Our brains are the most complex organisms in the known universe, but they don't come with an instruction manual. Today John takes us through some of the key principles to harness our brains to work for us, not against us. Expect to learn... What are the primary emotions which affect us every day? How can we overcome anxiety and fear? Why is precision with our speech so important? Which habit has had the most positive impact on John's life? What is John's issue with The Secret? And much more. Get Surfshark VPN - https://surfshark.deals/MODERNWISDOM (Enter Promo Code MODERNWISDOM for 83% off & One Extra Month Free) Extra Stuff: Follow John on Twitter - https://twitter.com/johnassaraf Buy Innercise - https://amzn.to/2uFqdxf Check out John's Website - https://www.myneurogym.com/ Take a break from alcohol and upgrade your life - https://6monthssober.com/podcast Check out everything I recommend from books to products - https://www.amazon.co.uk/shop/modernwisdom - Listen to all episodes online. Search "Modern Wisdom" on any Podcast App or click here: iTunes: https://apple.co/2MNqIgw Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2LSimPn Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/modern-wisdom - Get in touch in the comments below or head to... Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx Email: modernwisdompodcast@gmail.com

John AssarafguestChris Williamsonhost
Feb 16, 202048mWatch on YouTube ↗

At a glance

WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT

Reprogram Your Brain: Turn Fear Into Fuel And Design Success

  1. John Assaraf explains that modern underperformance is rarely about lacking information, but about unmanaged inner blocks like fear, limiting beliefs, self-image, and doubt. Drawing on neuroscience and psychology, he frames fear as a useful brain signal, not an enemy, and shows how awareness allows us to respond instead of react.
  2. He outlines four primary internal obstacles and offers practical tools—such as specific breathing and awareness exercises (Innercises)—to interrupt automatic patterns and regain control of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
  3. Assaraf also contrasts the popularized "law of attraction" with his "law of GOYA" (Get Off Your Ass), emphasizing that aligned action in the right order, plus mental and emotional alignment, is what actually produces results.
  4. Throughout, he stresses that no one is born with fixed beliefs or habits; by consciously rewriting our internal "script," building empowering habits, and using the brain more skillfully, we can deliberately create a different life.

IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING

5 ideas

Treat fear as a signal, not a stop sign.

Fear is a survival mechanism that flags potential danger, real or imagined. If you pause and assess—rather than automatically retreat—you can decide whether to proceed and even convert that nervous energy into forward momentum.

Identify and challenge limiting beliefs that shape your behavior.

Thoughts like "I’m too old" or "I’m not smart enough" form a lens that dictates what you attempt. Becoming aware of these implicit beliefs allows you to consciously replace them with empowering ones that support your goals.

Use simple state-change tools to regain control under stress.

Assaraf’s Innercise ‘Take 6, Calm the Circuits’—six slow nasal inhales with long straw-like exhales—shifts you from fight-or-flight (sympathetic) into a calmer, thinking state (parasympathetic). Pairing this with AIA (Awareness, Intention, Action) helps you interrupt old patterns and choose your next move deliberately.

Rewrite your personal “script” instead of replaying your old story.

Rather than staying trapped in a narrative of failure or limitation, you can write a new story beginning with “I’m so happy and grateful for the fact that…”, describing the income, body, relationships, and lifestyle you want, then rehearse and act it out until it becomes your new identity.

Focus on empowering vs. disempowering habits instead of ‘good’ vs. ‘bad’.

Labeling thoughts or behaviors as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ adds shame and resistance. Ask instead whether a habit moves you toward or away from your goals; that framing keeps you in choice and makes change more workable.

WORDS WORTH SAVING

5 quotes

Today's problem isn't that the how-to doesn't exist. It's all of the internal bullshit that people are dealing with that holds them back.

John Assaraf

The problem is not fear. The problem is that most people don't understand that fear is just a signal.

John Assaraf

You are not a victim of your circumstance or your conditions. The only way you're a victim is if you take that role on as part of your identity.

John Assaraf

If I understand that I am not my thoughts, I'm not my emotions, I'm not my behaviors, I'm not my results…I have those, then the question is, can I choose ones that are better for me?

John Assaraf

The law of attraction should be renamed to the law of resonance…Get your head, your heart, your gut, and your behaviors aligned, and then you will be in resonance.

John Assaraf

The four core internal blockers: fear, limiting beliefs, self-image, and lack of skills/knowledgeNeuroscience of fear, survival, and the brain’s protective algorithmsUsing awareness, meditation, and Innercises to manage emotions and behaviorEmpowering vs. disempowering habits and the anatomy of a habit loopRewriting personal identity and life story through deliberate mental scriptingThe law of attraction vs. the law of GOYA (action and resonance)Planning, right action, and leveraging existing expertise to achieve goals

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