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Dr. Shadé ZahraiDr. Shadé Zahrai

How Do You Know if You Made the Right Decision? | 3 Filter-Questions

The ability to make good decisions is one of life's most important yet underrated skills. Because, let's face it, a big part of where you are in life right now has to do with the bigger decisions that you made and acted on.

Dr. Shadé Zahraihost
Nov 12, 20207mWatch on YouTube ↗

Summaries, chapters, transcripts, and FAQs on this page are made by uListen, not YouTube.

At a glance

WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT

Three-question decision filter to reduce overthinking and choose confidently

  1. The video explains how the brain’s threat-bias can trigger over-analysis and make you fixate on “what-ifs” after (or before) a major decision.
  2. It introduces a three-question filter—growth, ego-check, and excitement—to cut through mental clutter and assess whether a path is right for you.
  3. It warns that decisions driven by status, titles, or other people’s approval often fail to produce lasting fulfillment due to the “hedonic treadmill.”
  4. It adds two pragmatic considerations—avoiding intentional harm and ensuring you have the means/timing—to make bold choices responsibly.
  5. It reframes decision-making as aiming for 70–80% certainty (not perfection) and notes most life decisions are reversible, making learning and growth the key upside.

IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING

5 ideas

Your brain will naturally magnify risks unless you deliberately refocus it.

Because the brain is wired for protection, it scans for threats and “what-ifs,” which can create a self-reinforcing loop where you notice evidence that supports fear-based beliefs.

Stop demanding 100% certainty; aim for “good enough” confidence.

You can’t guarantee outcomes, so holding decisions to an impossibly high bar increases paralysis; being satisfied with ~70–80% clarity can be more realistic and effective.

Choose paths that promote growth, even if success isn’t guaranteed.

If a decision will challenge you, stretch your comfort zone, and build capability or character, it can be “right” because the learning stays with you regardless of outcome.

Ego-driven decisions are a major red flag.

If the motivation is title, status, superiority, or validation, it’s unlikely to create durable happiness; research-linked dynamics like the hedonic treadmill mean the “high” fades quickly.

Approval-seeking can quietly hijack your choices.

Wanting others’ validation provides psychological safety, but “because they want me to” is not a stable foundation for major life or career decisions.

WORDS WORTH SAVING

5 quotes

You're never going to have a guaranteed outcome.

— Dr. Shadé Zahrai

Sometimes it's about being satisfied with 70 or 80% and not holding yourself to an impossibly high standard.

— Dr. Shadé Zahrai

Your brain, if left unchecked, has a natural tendency to dwell on the risks and the threats.

— Dr. Shadé Zahrai

You need to be invested in it for the right reasons. "Because they want me to," doesn't qualify.

— Dr. Shadé Zahrai

The best part about 99.9% of life decisions are that they are reversible, excluding having children or skydiving without a parachute, so think wisely about those.

— Dr. Shadé Zahrai

Read the available transcript
Overthinking and threat-focused brain biasConfirmation/attention bias (“you notice what you focus on”)Three-question decision filterGrowth through challenge and discomfortEgo, titles, status, and approval-seekingHedonic treadmill and lasting fulfillmentReversibility, planning, and responsible risk-taking

SPEAKERS

  • Dr. Shadé Zahrai

    host

    Organizational psychologist and leadership expert, host of the Dr. Shadé Zahrai channel.

High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.

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