By playing, you agree to uListen's Terms and Privacy Policy and YouTube's Terms of Service.
ADHD Chatter Podcast5 Signs You Have Autism AND ADHD + how to spot it EARLY in children | Dr Becky Quicke
Summaries, chapters, transcripts, and FAQs on this page are made by uListen, not YouTube.
Great conversations run long. Their best ideas don't have to.
uListen is free on iPhone, iPad, Android, Chrome, and Claude.
See howAt a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Dr Becky Quicke on Spotting and Understanding AuDHD in Children and Women
- Dr Quicke explains that AuDHD children have a narrow window of capacity, so they swing easily between overwhelm and under-stimulation, which can show up even in babies and look different from ordinary toddler tantrums.
- She says the two conditions can mask each other but can also intensify each other or work well together, so some women with a life that works for them still meet criteria for both.
- She argues early diagnosis reduces shame, helps people understand their needs, and can change a child's experience, while late diagnosis often brings relief, grief, anger and a need to peel back years of masking.
- She describes how gender stereotypes and 'good girl' conditioning have led to girls and women being missed, and how assessment must carefully separate trauma from neurodivergence.
- She identifies trust and a secure base as the core of a healthy family dynamic, noting that a parent's defensiveness about neurodiversity can reinforce a child's sense that something is wrong with them.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasAuDHD children have a narrow window of capacity
Dr Quicke says children can quickly become overwhelmed or underwhelmed, even as babies, because the AuDHD body is very sensory-permeable and feels stimulation intensely.
Meltdowns are different from toddler tantrums
Parents told her that the distress in AuDHD children feels more extreme than the 'terrible twos', though parents often assume it is typical tantrum behavior.
Autism and ADHD can cancel, intensify, or complement each other
Dr Quicke notes that women often feel they are neither condition because of masking, yet ADHD can also amplify the autistic experience, and some people combine the two to build strategies that work well.
Shame is the central harm of late or missed diagnosis
She defines shame as 'I am wrong' rather than 'I did something wrong', and says diagnosis can dissolve it, while unresolved shame leads to defenses such as avoidance or projection.
Social conditioning causes girls to hide their traits
Early gender stereotypes and 'good girl' programming teach girls to be still and obedient, so they suppress movement and true selves, and the education system's demand to sit still makes this worse.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesguilt is I have done something wrong, shame is I am wrong.
— Dr. Becky Quicke
understanding ourselves means that we can create a life where we don't need to cope.
— Dr. Becky Quicke
They intensify each other as well.
— Dr. Becky Quicke
Tomatoes, the fruit that doesn't belong in a fruit salad.
— Dr. Becky Quicke
children are, um, um, a mirror for us as parents.
— Dr. Becky Quicke
Ask ChatGPT about this episode
Get its key ideas, plus a summary of each chapter linked to that point in the video, right in your chat.
Add uListen AI to ChatGPT.
Install uListen AI in ChatGPT (opens in a new tab)Needs a ChatGPT account.Paste this prompt into a new chat.
Use uListen AI to give me this episode's key ideas and a chapter-by-chapter summary, with timestamps: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoQZJ1to-RM
SPEAKERS
Dr. Becky Quicke
guestClinical psychologist specializing in assessing ADHD and autism, particularly in girls and women.
Alex Partridge
hostHost of the podcast ADHD Chatter.
High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.
