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WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Codie Sanchez Shares Communication Techniques Top Leaders Use to Command Respect
- Sanchez argues that leaders lead with the headline, speak decisively, and cut hedging and filler so their words carry weight and their ideas can't be easily taken by others.
- She explains, drawing on behavioral psychologist Vanessa Van Edwards, that respect comes from quickly signaling both warmth and competence, using specific cues like the slow triple nod, head tilt, steepling, and posture.
- She teaches delivery techniques under the acronym GET (gestures, eyes, tone), plus deliberate pauses, a lower flatter vocal tone, and stories that lead before data.
- She covers framing tools including the rule of three, controlling the frame in a debate, naming the elephant in the room, ending with a command, and asking sharper questions.
- She advises projecting calm certainty, including not crying in meetings, and says top communicators are made through preparation, with an email exercise to see whether you lean warm or competent.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasStart with the point, not the preamble
Sanchez says giving the headline first frames the conversation, keeps people leaning in, and makes it hard for others to restate and claim your idea. Her formula for asking for time is what's wrong, why the other person should care, and how long it will take.
Respect is built on warmth and competence signals
Sanchez says the faster you signal 'I'm a friend' and 'you can rely on me,' the more people respect you. Warmth cues include the slow triple nod and head tilt, while competence cues include tall posture, hands visible, and steepling.
Fewer, sharper words with numbers carry authority
Saying 'We'll double revenue in 12 months' beats a vague plan to increase revenue significantly. Sanchez says data plus brevity signals confidence, and a phrase like 'my gut reaction' plus a clear next step lets you sound authoritative even when you're unsure.
Pauses and a lower, flatter tone create gravity
After a key point, Sanchez recommends stopping and counting to five, raising a finger to hold the floor if someone jumps in. She also advises avoiding the upward inflection at the end of sentences and avoiding filler words.
Stories stick while numbers slide off
Sanchez says stories should lead, with data woven in afterward. She illustrates this with a friend returning to a bad relationship, where recalling a specific night of crying is more memorable than a string of questions.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesHumans follow stories, not spreadsheets. Stories are sticky. Numbers slide off.
— Codie Sanchez
whoever controls the frame controls the debate.
— Codie Sanchez
The way that you get to the top 1% is you prep more than the other 99% do.
— Codie Sanchez
They use warmth and competence, and they use them like a scalpel, not a sledgehammer.
— Codie Sanchez
You can hate me on the internet for this, but your bank account will love me.
— Codie Sanchez
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SPEAKERS
Codie Sanchez
hostEntrepreneur and host of the BigDeal Podcast (BigDeal by Codie Sanchez), focused on business and investing.
High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.
