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Talking About Peer Pressure with Your Teen — Brought To You by Life360

What’s the most important skill for teens to resist peer pressure? The answer might surprise you. Here’s how to talk to your kid about this issue and prepare them for tricky situations. Today’s episode is brought to you by Life360: The location-sharing app that makes everyday family life better by simplifying and streamlining how you communicate and connect with each other. Learn more here: https://bit.ly/42H0SAB Get the Good Inside App by Dr. Becky: https://bit.ly/3Pu5WAI Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our newsletter: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter Order Dr. Becky's book, Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be, at goodinside.com/book or wherever you order your books.

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Feb 5, 20253mWatch on YouTube ↗

At a glance

WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT

Help teens resist peer pressure by strengthening self-talk and confidence

  1. Dr. Becky argues that resisting peer pressure depends more on what teens say to themselves than on rehearsed lines to say to friends.
  2. She recommends parents bring up peer pressure during a calm moment and normalize it by sharing their own adolescent experience.
  3. The practical strategy is to help teens generate confidence-building self-statements they can use in high-pressure situations (e.g., around drinking).
  4. She notes teens may roll their eyes or act annoyed, but that reaction can coexist with absorbing the message and building independence.

IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING

5 ideas

Focus on internal scripts, not comeback lines.

The most protective factor in a pressured moment is a teen’s ability to reassure themselves and access confidence, rather than perfectly wording a refusal to peers.

Teach the skill proactively when things are calm.

Bringing it up outside of conflict or real-time pressure helps teens think creatively and lowers defensiveness, making the tool more likely to stick.

Normalize peer pressure as common and sometimes subtle.

Describing pressure as sometimes direct and sometimes “in the air” helps teens recognize it earlier and reduces shame about feeling influenced.

Help your teen generate their own self-talk first.

Pausing and asking what they could say to themselves increases buy-in; if they can’t think of anything, parents can offer a few options as scaffolding.

Use identity-affirming statements to protect autonomy.

Phrases like “I’m still an awesome person if I decide differently” reinforce self-worth independent of group approval, which supports better choices.

WORDS WORTH SAVING

5 quotes

The most important thing in resisting peer pressure is knowing what you can say to yourself.

— Dr. Becky

When you're in a situation where your friends are kind of pressuring you to do something, what helps you make a good decision isn't thinking about what to say to them.

— Dr. Becky

Dealing with peer pressure, it isn't about what you say to your friends. I've actually learned it's about what you say to yourself, and this is really true for adults too.

— Dr. Becky

I'm still an awesome person if I make different decisions than my friends.

— Dr. Becky

This feels like something I have to do in the moment, and at the same time, there's no pressure. I can make a different decision.

— Dr. Becky

Peer pressure reframing (internal vs external responses)Confidence and identity in decision-makingParent-teen conversation timing (calm moments)Modeling and normalization through personal storiesSelf-talk scripts for high-pressure situationsTeen defensiveness/eye-rolling as independenceExample scenario: alcohol use

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