Modern WisdomAre Incels A Threat To Society? - William Costello
At a glance
WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT
Incels, Mating Crisis, And Modern Feminism’s Unintended Social Consequences
- Chris Williamson and evolutionary psychology researcher William Costello discuss incels within a larger “modern mating crisis” shaped by feminism, online dating, shifting gender roles, and economic incentives. They argue that corporate and cultural forces push a male-default, careerist model onto women while devaluing motherhood, contributing to declining birthrates and relationship instability. Costello presents data showing extreme loneliness, depression, and suicidality among incels, alongside evidence that a small minority of high-status men capture a disproportionate share of sexual opportunities. They also critique media alarmism about incel terrorism, suggesting the bigger risk is self‑directed harm and a broader societal destabilization from large numbers of unpartnered men and women.
IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING
5 ideasA small minority of men are monopolizing sexual access in the modern mating market.
Data cited show the top 20% and especially top 5% of men greatly increased their number of sexual partners over time, while overall male partner counts stayed flat—evidence of “effective polygyny,” where a few high-status ‘Chads’ dominate.
Corporate and cultural messaging incentivize women toward child-free, careerist lifestyles.
Bloomberg and Morgan Stanley portray single, childless women as aspirational worker-consumers, which Costello and Williamson see as aligning with corporate interests and contributing to a Brave New World–style, atomized, hedonistic society.
Incels are severely mentally unwell and primarily self-hating, not simply misogynistic extremists.
Costello’s research finds very high rates of depression, anxiety, loneliness, and suicidality among incels, with most of their toxic language directed at themselves; only a minority of posts are overtly racist or misogynistic, and the majority don’t fit a classic organized-terror profile.
Belief in permanent inceldom and the black pill mindset worsens mental health outcomes.
Around 80% of surveyed incels believe they will be celibate for life, and this sense of permanence plus an external locus of control strongly predicts lower life satisfaction and higher depression, reinforcing hopelessness and withdrawal.
Hypergamy is changing but not disappearing, and the consequences can be ugly.
As more women out-earn or out-educate men, some are “mating down” reluctantly, with evidence of rising female infidelity and greater reports of intimate partner violence in relationships where the woman has higher status—indicating unresolved tension in shifting gender and status dynamics.
WORDS WORTH SAVING
5 quotesThe mating crisis hurts everybody, not just incels, not just men. It hurts almost everybody except a tiny minority of men at the top.
— William Costello
Loveless sex is not empowering, and teaching women that they should compete with men on having loveless sex—only one gender is going to win that. It’s not going to be the women.
— Chris Williamson
We live in a world that’s very saturated with sex. You get the impression that everyone is out there having amazing sex lives… People overestimate how much sex other people are having.
— William Costello
Evolutionarily, we’re not actually enemies; we’re each other’s greatest ally. These concerted efforts to make men and women adversarial are ultimately doomed to fail in the face of 150,000 years of selection pressures causing us to love each other.
— William Costello
From an extremism point of view, what does extreme inceldom look like? To me, it looks more like suicidality than terrorism.
— William Costello
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