#1 Divorce Lawyer: After 1000 Cases, Here’s the REAL Reason Marriages Fail (It’s NOT What You Think)

What do you need from a partner that you haven’t been getting? Today, Jay sits down with renowned divorce attorney and author James Sexton for a conversation that redefines what it means to love and be loved. With over twenty-five years spent guiding couples through heartbreak and separation, James has witnessed both the beauty and the brutality of human connection. They talk about how we’re taught to plan weddings rather than marriages, and why the most meaningful moments come from small, steady acts of care, not grand romantic gestures. Whether it’s remembering to replace a partner’s favorite granola or reaching for their hand without being asked, James shows that a strong marriage isn’t about avoiding conflict, but about staying close even in the uncomfortable moments. He reminds us that love isn't for the faint of heart. In this interview, you'll learn: How to Stay Connected in Love How to Keep the Spark Alive in Marriage How to Recognize When Disconnection Begins How to Argue Without Breaking the Bond How to Rebuild Trust After Betrayal How to Talk About Difficult Topics with Compassion How to Choose Courage Over Comfort in Relationships What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 00:29 The Real Reasons Marriages Fall Apart 02:39 Why Do We Still Get Married? 04:40 The Truth About the Wedding Industry 08:54 What Divorce Really Looks Like 13:16 The Hard Conversations Bring You Closer 15:44 What is the True Cause of Divorce? 22:48 The Power of Small Gestures in Love 28:52 Simple Ways to Appreciate Your Partner 32:09 How We Repeat Our Parents’ Patterns 38:41 Navigating Love After Having a Child 42:55 How to Reconnect with What Brought You Together 46:17 Why Does Asking For Love Feel Needy? 50:10 Designing the Ideal Contract for Modern Love 57:55 Understanding the Connection Between Desire and Disconnection 01:01:13 Commitment vs. Passion 01:07:07 How to Begin the Conversations You’ve Been Avoiding 01:11:47 The Lies We Tell Ourselves in Love 01:16:05 Should You Get a Prenup? 01:22:26 How to Bring Up The Prenup 01:29:45 Talk Through Your Anger, Don’t Act On It 01:31:18 Using Love As a Weapon 01:36:17 Should You Fight for It or Let Go? 01:42:59 How Parental Conflict Affects Children 01:48:59 Be the Calm Your Child Needs 01:59:09 The Real Problems Marriage Can’t Solve 02:02:52 Who Files For Divorce More: Men or Women? 02:07:46 How Divorce Impacts Men and Women Differently 02:13:39 James on Final Five Episode Resources: https://www.nycdivorces.com/ https://www.instagram.com/nycdivorcelawyer https://www.tiktok.com/@nycdivorce https://www.linkedin.com/in/james-j-sexton-805109b7/ https://www.instagram.com/jayshetty https://www.facebook.com/jayshetty/ https://x.com/jayshetty https://www.linkedin.com/in/shettyjay/ https://www.youtube.com/@JayShettyPodcast http://jayshetty.me

Jay ShettyhostJames Sextonguest

Nov 24, 20252h 27mWatch on YouTube ↗

EPISODE INFO

Released: November 24, 2025
Duration: 2h 27m
Channel: Jay Shetty Podcast
Watch on YouTube: ▶ Open ↗

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

What do you need from a partner that you haven’t been getting? Today, Jay sits down with renowned divorce attorney and author James Sexton for a conversation that redefines what it means to love and be loved. With over twenty-five years spent guiding couples through heartbreak and separation, James has witnessed both the beauty and the brutality of human connection. They talk about how we’re taught to plan weddings rather than marriages, and why the most meaningful moments come from small, steady acts of care, not grand romantic gestures. Whether it’s remembering to replace a partner’s favorite granola or reaching for their hand without being asked, James shows that a strong marriage isn’t about avoiding conflict, but about staying close even in the uncomfortable moments. He reminds us that love isn't for the faint of heart. In this interview, you'll learn: How to Stay Connected in Love How to Keep the Spark Alive in Marriage How to Recognize When Disconnection Begins How to Argue Without Breaking the Bond How to Rebuild Trust After Betrayal How to Talk About Difficult Topics with Compassion How to Choose Courage Over Comfort in Relationships What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 00:29 The Real Reasons Marriages Fall Apart 02:39 Why Do We Still Get Married? 04:40 The Truth About the Wedding Industry 08:54 What Divorce Really Looks Like 13:16 The Hard Conversations Bring You Closer 15:44 What is the True Cause of Divorce? 22:48 The Power of Small Gestures in Love 28:52 Simple Ways to Appreciate Your Partner 32:09 How We Repeat Our Parents’ Patterns 38:41 Navigating Love After Having a Child 42:55 How to Reconnect with What Brought You Together 46:17 Why Does Asking For Love Feel Needy? 50:10 Designing the Ideal Contract for Modern Love 57:55 Understanding the Connection Between Desire and Disconnection 01:01:13 Commitment vs. Passion 01:07:07 How to Begin the Conversations You’ve Been Avoiding 01:11:47 The Lies We Tell Ourselves in Love 01:16:05 Should You Get a Prenup? 01:22:26 How to Bring Up The Prenup 01:29:45 Talk Through Your Anger, Don’t Act On It 01:31:18 Using Love As a Weapon 01:36:17 Should You Fight for It or Let Go? 01:42:59 How Parental Conflict Affects Children 01:48:59 Be the Calm Your Child Needs 01:59:09 The Real Problems Marriage Can’t Solve 02:02:52 Who Files For Divorce More: Men or Women? 02:07:46 How Divorce Impacts Men and Women Differently 02:13:39 James on Final Five Episode Resources: https://www.nycdivorces.com/ https://www.instagram.com/nycdivorcelawyer https://www.tiktok.com/@nycdivorce https://www.linkedin.com/in/james-j-sexton-805109b7/ https://www.instagram.com/jayshetty https://www.facebook.com/jayshetty/ https://x.com/jayshetty https://www.linkedin.com/in/shettyjay/ https://www.youtube.com/@JayShettyPodcast http://jayshetty.me

SPEAKERS

Jay Shetty
host
Host of the Jay Shetty Podcast.
James Sexton
guest
Divorce attorney and author of "How to Stay in Love".

EPISODE SUMMARY

In this episode of Jay Shetty Podcast, featuring Jay Shetty and James Sexton, #1 Divorce Lawyer: After 1000 Cases, Here’s the REAL Reason Marriages Fail (It’s NOT What You Think) explores divorce lawyer reveals marriage fails through disconnection, not dramatic betrayals James Sexton argues that the real driver of divorce is gradual disconnection from self and partner, not headline causes like cheating or money.

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