Uncertainty is Not the Enemy

Today's episode is about learning to sit with uncertainty. The episode opens with a discussion of listener questions on how to handle risk, the ingredients of a great apology, and why people stay loyal to relationships and organizations that quietly drain them. Then Brené and Adam turn to uncertainty – how our brains are wired for a threat response, what intolerance of uncertainty actually is, and why it can drive people toward authoritarian leaders. You can find The Curiosity Shop on ⁠YouTube⁠ and ⁠Instagram⁠ (@thecuriosityshop). 0:00 - Introduction and Guest Questions 3:20 - Is Risk Something to Review or Reveal 13:40 - Why do People Stay Loyal to Bad Relationships? 22:28 - Strategies for Apologizing and Repair 32:33 - Is Uncertainty a Strength or Deficit for Leaders? 40:15 - Intolerance for Uncertainty 52:00 - Terror Management Theory and our Response to Uncertainty 59:50 - How Can We Manage Uncertainty 1:05:00 - Closing Capabilities, Cognition and Inertia: Evidence from Digital Imaging - Tripsas and Gavetti, 2000, Harvard Business School (Polaroid Study) https://www.hbs.edu/ris/PublicationFiles/00-067_cdcafdf1-d946-44ec-96ad-558ad606477d.pdf The Fearless Organization: Creating Psychological Safety in the Workplace for Learning, Innovation, and Growth - Amy Edmondson, 2019, Book https://amycedmondson.com/psychological-safety/ Is it Safe to Speak Up at Work? - Adam Grant and Amy Edmonson, July 2021, Worklife with Adam Grant Podcast https://www.ted.com/talks/worklife_with_adam_grant_is_it_safe_to_speak_up_at_work Anchored, Aligned, Accountable: A Framework for Transcending Bullsh*t and Transforming Our Lives and Work (Foreword by Brené Brown) - Aiko Bethea, 2026, Book https://www.amazon.com/Anchored-Aligned-Accountable-Transcending-Transforming/dp/0593732162 Predicting Exit Voice Loyalty and Neglect - Withey and Cooper, 1989, Administrative Science Quarterly https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/Predicting-Exit,-Voice,-Loyalty,-and-Neglect.-Withey-Cooper/fcb359fca6d04aacc3c560f0bd11fb2bfc281aa8 Exit, Voice, and Loyalty: Responses to Decline in Firms, Organizations, and States - Albert Hirschman,1970, Book https://www.researchgate.net/publication/268485669_Hirschman_and_Voice/link/5b571700aca27217ffb7b806/download?_tp=eyJjb250ZXh0Ijp7ImZpcnN0UGFnZSI6InB1YmxpY2F0aW9uIiwicGFnZSI6InB1YmxpY2F0aW9uIn19 The Decision Lab: System Justification Theory https://thedecisionlab.com/reference-guide/sociology/system-justification-theory The Secrets of a Great Apology - Adam Grant and Beth Polin, 2025, WorkLife with Adam Grant Podcast https://www.ted.com/pages/the-secrets-of-a-great-apology-transcript The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships - Harriet Lerner, 2025, Book https://www.amazon.com/Dance-Anger-Changing-Patterns-Relationships/dp/0062319043 I’m Sorry: How to Apologize and Why It Matters, Part 1 of 2 - Brené Brown and Harriet Lerner, 2020, Unlocking Us with Brene Brown Podcast https://brenebrown.com/podcast/harriet-lerner-and-brene-im-sorry-how-to-apologize-why-it-matters-part-1-of-2/ Conclave - Robert Harris, 2016, Book https://bookshop.org/p/books/conclave-robert-harris/8e71e23a28df2e93?source=aw&sv1=affiliate&sv_campaign_id=449857&utm_source=awin&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=449857&utm_term=0&sscid=92005_1776076021_301f35b7503e6d13630c0fd15d67ed9c&awc=92005_1776076021_301f35b7503e6d13630c0fd15d67ed9c A Comprehensive Analysis of COVID-19 Misinformation, Public Health Impacts, and Communication Strategies: Scoping Review - Kisa, 2024, Journal of Medical Internet Research https://www.researchgate.net/publication/383395233_A_Comprehensive_Analysis_of_COVID-19_Misinformation_Public_Health_Impacts_and_Communication_Strategies_Scoping_Review Into the Unknown: A Review and Synthesis of Contemporary Models Involving Uncertainty - Carleton, 2016, Journal of Anxiety Disorders https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0887618516300251 Conceptual Models of Generalized Anxiety Disorder - Fisher and Wells, 2011, Psychiatric Annals https://www.researchgate.net/publication/269477556_Conceptual_Models_of_Generalized_Anxiety_Disorder The Other Side of Change: Who We Become When Life Makes Other Plans - Maya Shankar, 2026, Book https://mayashankar.com/ Aftereffects of Stress on Human Performance and Social Behavior: A Review of Research and Theory - Cohen (Includes the work of Glass and Singer), 1980, Carnegie Mellon Research University https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Sheldon-Cohen/publication/15796493_Aftereffects_of_stress_on_human_performance_and_social_behavior_A_review_of_research_and_theory/links/02e7e52a86a0842d4f000000/Aftereffects-of-stress-on-human-performance-and-social-behavior-A-review-of-research-and-theory.pdf Hofstede's Cultural Dimensions on Uncertainty Avoidance https://geerthofstede.com/culture-geert-hofstede-gert-jan-hofstede/6d-model-of-national-culture/ For full show notes, see audio platforms.