Skip to content

By playing, you agree to uListen's Terms and Privacy Policy and YouTube's Terms of Service.

Jay Shetty PodcastJay Shetty Podcast

Charli D’Amelio: When I Hit 100M Followers I Was At My Lowest Mentally… @CharlidAmelio

Today, I welcome Charli D’Amelio, the 19-year-old who became a celebrity thanks to her rapid rise on TikTok where she has amassed over 150 million followers, making her the most followed person on the platform.

Charli D’AmelioguestJay Shettyhost
Oct 30, 20231h 32mWatch on YouTube

Summaries, chapters, transcripts, and FAQs on this page are made by uListen, not YouTube.

Great conversations run long. Their best ideas don't have to.

uListen is free on iPhone, iPad, Android, Chrome, and Claude.

See how

At a glance

WHAT IT’S REALLY ABOUT

Charli D’Amelio on identity loss, fame pressure, and rebuilding herself

  1. Charli D’Amelio describes how sudden fame shifted her life from being unnoticed to being constantly judged, leading her to create a protective public persona that didn’t match how she felt privately.
  2. She says labeling her success as luck helped her stay humble but also intensified doubts about deserving her career, especially when criticism and exclusion from peers reinforced insecurity.
  3. She explains that molding herself to satisfy comments and adult expectations left her unsure who she was, and she’s now rediscovering identity through small choices—style, music, routines, and self-talk.
  4. She discusses how family pressures and mental strain showed up during season three of their reality show, and how edits and online reactions can misrepresent what she was actually experiencing.
  5. She shares how she’s learning to ignore bait and rumors, prioritize mental health over saying yes to everything, and rebuild confidence by speaking more openly and leading with empathy.

IDEAS WORTH REMEMBERING

5 ideas

Fame forced a split between her public image and her private self.

She describes putting up a protective “shield” early on—saying hate didn’t bother her publicly while crying privately—which later made it hard to get out of that shell and be honest about her feelings.

Calling success “luck” can protect humility while quietly eroding self-worth.

She says viewing her success as “luck” helps her stay humble, but it also fed doubts about whether she deserved her platform—especially when others told her she didn’t.

Over-optimizing for approval can erase your sense of identity.

She explains she began letting comments dictate choices (what she wore, said, and posted) until she realized she didn’t know her own preferences—answering “I don’t know” to basics like style, music, movies, and makeup.

Rebuilding identity started with support systems and small experiments in daily life.

She describes getting “really low” at different times, including staying in her room for long periods, and says therapy, family support, and being pushed to re-engage with life helped her start trying new things to learn who she is.

Small, self-directed routines became a source of control and calm.

She highlights everyday, controllable routines—cleaning/organizing, time with her dogs, dancing alone in her garage—as grounding, therapeutic, and a way to regain agency when so much else feels scrutinized.

WORDS WORTH SAVING

5 quotes

It was one day, no one cared what I did, no one cared what I wore, what I looked like, what I said. And then all of a sudden, that was all anyone would talk about.

— Charli D’Amelio

I have so much life that no one sees. I have so much about me that no one knows about. And I'm fine with that, you know?

— Charli D’Amelio

I don't feel like I need to change myself for anyone because I've, I did that for so long, and it was so exhausting.

— Charli D’Amelio

It was actually right when I hit 100 million, I think I was at the lowest mental state possible, and I looked so happy online.

— Charli D’Amelio

Lead with empathy. Don't be so hard on every single thing, every situation, everything, no matter what. Like, you never, ever know what someone's truly going through.

— Charli D’Amelio

Read the available transcript
Sudden fame and constant scrutinyLuck vs. deservingness and self-worthPublic persona vs. private selfTherapy, self-talk, and identity discoveryFamily dynamics under pressureReality TV filming and narrative editsRumors, clickbait, and not responding to bait

Ask ChatGPT about this episode

Get its key ideas, plus a summary of each chapter linked to that point in the video, right in your chat.

  1. Add uListen AI to ChatGPT.

    Install uListen AI in ChatGPT (opens in a new tab)Needs a ChatGPT account.

  2. Paste this prompt into a new chat.

    Use uListen AI to give me this episode's key ideas and a chapter-by-chapter summary, with timestamps: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Imz9Opijg5w

SPEAKERS

  • Charli D’Amelio

    guest

    TikTok creator and dancer who rose to global fame as a teen and later expanded into TV and live performance.

  • Jay Shetty

    host

    Podcast host and bestselling author of the health and wellness show “On Purpose with Jay Shetty.”

High quality AI-generated summary created from speaker-labeled transcript.

Get more out of YouTube videos.

Read along on your phone, search it beside the video, or ask your favorite AI app what was said.

iOSAndroidClaudeChatGPTChrome